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Chapter 1: What questions did you receive for the 4.2 million subscriber Q&A?
What's happening, people? Welcome back to the show. It is a 4.2 million subscriber Q&A episode. And as is tradition, I asked for questions from Twitter and YouTube and Instagram, and there were lots. So let's get into it. Stealthing through 21. What's going on with all these group episodes in the studio?
Yeah, I guess I kind of launched this studio and at no point actually got to tell you that it was happening. It's sort of unceremonious beginning. There was no ribbon cutting thing. And I'm just having a lot of fun having multiple guests in the studio with me.
You know, for a long time, Modern Wisdom has been very serious, meaningful conversations, me talking to world experts, you know, 1,100 episodes like that. And I still love doing that. But Sometimes it can feel a little bit like homework when it's very serious all the time.
And these hang style episodes, the one that I did with Huberman, McCusker and Segura for me was one of the most fun conversations I've ever had. I thought that was awesome. I think that the episodes I do with George and Sean have been so much fun as well. The debate stuff is cool because it's not necessarily people on opposite sides of
Of a discussion, one of the problems of most debates, at least for me on the internet, is that it becomes a slanging match. Everyone's there as basically a verbal blood sport to see who can fuck who up the most. And you don't actually get to arrive at consensus at the end.
What you get is a bunch of people who shouted and you don't actually know what the conclusion is or the takeaway because no one's going to cede ground. No one ever says... oh, actually, that's an interesting insight. I never thought of that because they know that they're supposed to be in opposition.
Whereas the conversations that I'm trying to put together are people who have slightly differing perspectives on the same topic. And that means that maybe they can actually develop each other's worldviews as opposed to it just being this like...
bay blade remember bay blades where you like gripped it and ripped it and it span around and everybody got destroyed in the end everybody got destroyed i don't want that uh i'm just having a lot of fun i want to have a lot of fun on the show especially this year you know it took six months to build the studio and i love being here and i i'm not gonna do that and not invite my friends around to hang out and have a good time and have a laugh also if i'm being honest i think that
the sort of grind slop era of pushing people to always, always only ever really focus on personal development and self-improvement at the expense of everything else. I'm personally feeling a little bit of fatigue with that. And that's still amazing for me and Hormozy to sit down and talk and get people to lock in.
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Chapter 2: What are your thoughts on the impact of Harambe on society?
Kayla, I'm sorry that I haven't been responding to your comments. If you've been here since 100 followers and I'm still landing on your newsfeed, that feels pretty sticky. I apologize that you think that the show's dropped off. I let fame get way to my head. I'm going to push back against that one. British people and the brand of British person that I am basically has anti-ego.
And I don't think it's fair to allege that I've let fame get way to my head because I'm not responding to your comments. There used to be 100 followers and I would respond a lot. There's 4.2 million now. I'm still responding a lot. There's just more people for the responses to go around, okay? I'm really trying. I don't even have good guests anymore. I apologize.
I would love to hear who you would like me to bring on the show. I'm always open to suggestions from you or from anybody else. And I've listened and I've brought on lots of suggestions that have come. Many of the suggestions are people suggesting themselves and other suggestions don't work. Not right. There's a mixed bag of tastefulness inside of every audience. Mine is more tasteful than most.
Thank you. I'm sorry, Kayla, but I'm glad that you've been here for the last eight and a bit years. I hope that you keep listening. This episode is brought to you by Whoop. According to my Whoop, I've tracked nearly 2000 days of my life. And the thing that still gets me is that I could have predicted almost every bad day before it happens.
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Chapter 3: How do you feel about sleeping with an ex?
Try it for free. If you don't like it after 29 days, they just give you your money back. Right now, you can get the brand new Whoop 5.0 and that 30-day free trial by going to the link in the description below or heading to join.whoop.com slash modernwisdom. That's join.whoop.com slash modernwisdom. Verocoria. Whatever. Talk about golden retrievers.
Dude, where I live in Austin, Texas is kind of like It's essentially the epicenter. It's the supermassive black hole in the center of the golden retriever verse of Austin, Texas. And I think that this is maybe a psyop by Big Golden to get me to buy a golden. You know the Truman Show and the guy comes over the radio? He's like...
send in another three golden retrievers to sniff his leg as he walks past. And it's every single fucking day that I go. So I'm happy to talk about golden retrievers. Wally meets world on Instagram is perhaps my favorite Instagram account. It's this overly emotional golden retriever who permanently looks like he's going through a depressive episode. And I love him. I love him so much.
Like if I sat down, I would, I would happily do a round table episode with three golden retrievers. Um, Give me time. Give me time. I really want to have one. I feel bad because my mom and dad always had dogs when I was growing up and they treated them so well in terms of they always got walks. They were always looked after.
They weren't pampered, but they were just, they were never left alone for too long. They got regular exercise. They were golden border collies. I would feel so bad knowing the standard of care that a dog can get and that a dog did get from my mom and dad. I would feel bad to have one and not do that for it.
So I'm aware this is like... It's the I'm not ready to have a baby equivalent for fucking golden retrievers. But... I really want one and I'm trying to not be selfish about getting one just because I want it to then not give it the standard of care that I think it deserves. So I will soon, so soon.
If anyone can recommend a golden retriever breeder or something, that probably will push me a little closer. Nice, fluffy, a show golden, not a working golden, please. Love working goldens, but I want a big, I want a big fluffy idiot, please. Big fluffy idiot, thank you. Amber Ravina, more open tabs, group pods, please, and thank you. Yes. Yes, but caveat, I don't know what the name is.
I don't know what the name is of all of these. I've been fighting so hard behind the scenes to work out what to call these things. We were going to call the big names episodes, like human McCusker Segura, Uncommon Conversations, because it is. It's a strange group of people. It's so long. When you try and put that on YouTube or Spotify, it's huge. It takes up loads of space.
So then we were going to call it smoke break, right? It's casual. We're going to call it hot mic and someone's got hot mic and they've got George Bush money. So I don't want to go up against them. Then it was going to be smoke break.
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Chapter 4: How do you deal with the pressure of being a public figure?
It still might be, you know, the CEO goes out for a smoke break and the janitor's there kind of playing off that. Plus it's casual and relaxed. Then it was going to be good vibes or good dudes. And it would be funny if we brought a girl along because she would still be a good dude.
And then the one with George and Sean and the guys was maybe going to be good dudes or rabbit hole because we keep going down rabbit holes. But then there's a New York Times limited series from ages ago called Rabbit Hole.
And then it was going to be open tabs because it's all of the things that are in our minds and all of the different tabs that we've got open on Chrome, the shit that we've seen on the internet. I don't know what to call it. And it's giving me It's giving me low-key anxiety because I keep releasing episodes and I can't decide. I can't decide what it is. And we keep on having the same...
Discussions, and we were also going to call it blunt rotation. The big episode was going to be called blunt rotation. I don't know what to call it. Maybe I should just do... If I do a poll, people are going to vote on the one that they think sounds cool, but not the one that they would click on.
And then every time that we pick something, we have to go through... We have to check with an IP lawyer. Because when you get to a certain size... because people think that you have money that they can come after you for. It's called passing off in the UK. I don't know what the equivalent is in the US. Infringement, basically.
And the US is a first to use, not a first to file as well in trademark law, which means you get a degree of protection by simply using it first, even if you haven't registered it. The fucking nightmare. But whatever it's called, you will be getting more of those group pods. I enjoy them. I think they're fun. Just need a name, okay? PNobel3, can you get Elon Musk on the pod?
I got put in a signal group chat with him last week. I've been orbiting for a while, which I guess is an appropriate term for him, both sexually and physically. And I had slowly sort of crept toward him. He'd watched a bunch of the pods. He posted the David Friedberg app that we did on X, which was very kind. And then I got put in a group chat after he posted that one.
And I said, do you want to come on the pod? And he said, maybe after the SpaceX IPO. So just waiting for maybe the most valuable company ever in history to go public. And then once that's happened, we'll do something. I've got an idea. for how I want to put that together. I want to do something incredibly special, similar to the McConaughey, kind of the big moment.
And regardless of what you think about Elon, you don't even need to like him. You don't need to agree with him. You can't deny that he's one of the most influential people on the planet. He is. And maybe one of the most influential people. He may end up being the most influential person in history by the time that he dies.
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Chapter 5: What was your favorite part of the recent tour in Australia?
And I think... it's a good idea to have a conversation with someone like that. So I'm going to try and I'm going to do something special. K-P-T-M-I-Z. Chris, I found the tall girl problem is actually a compounding issue. If a woman has a high income plus high EQ from therapy, plus the wisdom of intense life experiences, she becomes taller in ways she can't unlearn.
How do we address this asymmetric growth? Is it a problem of how we incentivize men toward internal work? Or is it that we lack therapy or growth models specifically tailored to men? P.S., Curious if other women here feel their height is coming at least equally, if not more from their personal growth than their paycheck. This is why I love the Modern Wisdom audience.
Like that is a fucking awesome question. That is a really, really interesting question from someone who's thought about it deeply. And that's why I love you guys. The question here, tall girl problem, socioeconomic success from women has made it difficult or more difficult for them to find a partner who is as socioeconomically successful as they are or more.
Women typically want to date a man who's as educated as they are or more and as financially successful as they are or more. There is a third element here that's being proposed by KP, which is the emotional development. If you've done a lot of self-work, here is another... delta to another distance from you to the people that you're trying to date.
And I get the sense that this is actually one that could maybe be more destructive to relationships, especially over the long term. So on the front end, when you meet someone, you might be more concerned with their education level and their current earning. As you get into a relationship, that may, I think, become less and less relevant.
On the other side, I think someone's emotional intelligence up front, you're not being that emotional, right? When you first meet somebody, you maybe get some senses here and there.
But as you get deeper into the relationship, if you've done a lot of self-work, if you've done a lot of therapy, if you've thought deeply about your emotions, you're trying to connect to your feelings, you're understanding your patterns, you're really trying to go there. You're trying to hold your emotions. You're trying to develop yourself.
If you and your partner have a big delta, I think that is... going to create more friction and make you feel more alone in the relationship than them not having a master's when you've got a master's and they've just got an undergrad degree or something like that. So I think this is almost certainly a contributing element.
I don't know whether the asymmetric growth is that women are doing more emotional work. It obviously seems like you are, unsurprising, Modern Wisdom listener, obviously. I don't know whether that is on average true for women to be more emotionally in tune and developed than men are in the same way as high levels of degree accomplishment and high levels of financial success are true.
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Chapter 6: When is the right time to settle down?
I was like, oh, well, why don't I do a mixer after the live event? It's going to be hard because like London, the Apollo show in London in October is, it's a three and a half thousand capacity venue and we sold it out last time. So first off, where the fuck am I going to put, let's say 20% of the people from there go. That's a lot of people, like 700 people is a lot of people.
And what if this, I just had this vision in the back of my mind that two people get drunk and go home and have a fumble. And then like right wing misogynist, blue pilled cuck, feminist podcaster embroiled in drunken. I'm like, I wasn't even there.
I was just trying to get, I was just trying to fucking fix the birth rate and get some, make people, help people fall in love and find someone that they're less alone with. So. That's what I'm trying to think about. Maybe just come to the live shows and just hang around in the lobby and have a little flirt, have a little chat, you know? Maybe that'll fix it. But I feel you.
If you're very emotionally developed, it's going to be hard to resonate with people. And yeah, you become taller in ways you can't unlearn, right? You can stop going to work. If you want to settle down, start a family, you can pivot your career. It's very difficult to forget that. the inner work that you've done, the emotional development, and it's going to make you feel quite alone.
So the more developed that you get as a human, it's kind of like having a really refined palate. become a foodie and you can understand the difference between this particular type of bolognese sauce and another one. And it means as your palate is more refined, there are fewer and fewer places that you can go to eat because you're not going to be able to enjoy things in quite the same way.
You may be going to see through the shallowness of certain types of foods in ways that someone who doesn't have such a developed palate might not. They might not struggle with it. And I feel for you, but also I think that the development is worth it. You just need to work a little bit harder to find your person. And I am going to try and help.
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Chapter 7: What is the smallest hill you would die on?
It's incredibly unattractive and does risk you being accused of, we've heard this before. It's like, well, if you've heard it before, why aren't you implementing it? If you've heard everything about sleep, why does your sleep still suck? If you already know the 80-20, if I've covered the 80-20, I've covered the 100-0, why does your sleep still suck? Well, it's because you're not doing it.
And maybe you need to be reminded of it more. Or maybe I need to do recap episodes. I don't know. I understand what you mean. And I'm actively trying to avoid adding unnecessarily to grind slop and creating this sense of people... don't feel enough.
The only way that I can be enough is if I'm permanently pushing myself nose to the grindstone as hard as possible and optimizing areas of my life that don't matter that much. trying to contribute, trying to give people a varied diet when it comes to this. And, you know, if I want to go back over old stuff, I will do.
And if I want to try and have somebody on to discuss something because I've kind of forgotten, my sleep started to suck a little bit. And I'm like, okay, fuck it. Matt Walker, spin you back up. Let's do the greatest hits. Maybe I'll do that too. But I'm conscious of what you're saying and it's an accurate insight. I'm with you. I'm with you.
Jared, have you ever considered that you might have a drinking problem? I don't consider a lot, Chris. Well, you drank an entire case of Athletic Brewing Co. last night. But they're non-alcoholic. And that's not a problem? Sorry, man. I just kept chugging away for the regret to creep in. Never happened. See, most people, like Jared, don't want to change what they drink.
They just don't want the next day to be a complete write-off. And that is why I'm such a huge fan of Athletic Brewing Co. They make the best NA brews on the planet. You can find Athletic Brewing Co. 's best-selling lineup at grocery or liquor stores near you, or, best option, get a full variety pack of four flavors shipped direct to your door.
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Thank you. I've been a listener since 2020. I have one pretty important question that you are well qualified to answer. Would bringing back carnage traffic light parties solve the declining birth rate? I mean, it's got a shot. It's got a shot because we've tried everything. Hungary, Taxes for mothers, tax breaks for mothers, that didn't work. I think it's got a shot.
Look, for the people that don't know, Carnage was a t-shirt bar crawl that I ran for a long time. It was the first franchise that I owned in the UK when I was running nightclubs. And you wear a sticker, green sticker on you means good to go. Orange sticker means thinking about it, I'm not sure. And a red sticker means I'm taken, right? So like single, considering it, taken.
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Chapter 8: How do you handle backlash from controversial episodes?
So there you go. Chris Williamson, no, chriswillx.com slash books. mhalla78, I would love to hear your thoughts on alcohol. I see in your latest video that alcohol is a part of your life. In the past, you've been a strong advocate of the benefits of not drinking. That's true, yes. I went sober for a good while. I did a thousand days sober.
I did a bunch of six-month sobers starting about a decade ago. It doesn't sound very revolutionary now, but back in the day when I did that as a nightclub promoter in his 20s, that was...
fucking unheard of right especially being in newcastle which is kind of the capital of drinking in the uk and it was really beneficial and i made a lot of progress and then i did a video about what i learned from a thousand days not drinking and it was super helpful that being said anybody who says the alcohol can't make a night out better hasn't had a good enough night out like it absolutely can improve your experience
problem i had was when it felt like i was obliged to do it or like i wouldn't i couldn't have a good night if i didn't do it and i didn't like that i didn't like being at the mercy of some that's the same reason i did a thousand days sorry i did 500 days without caffeine because i didn't like the idea that i didn't have control over my energy levels without needing to artificially inseminate it with something else and
I was on tour around Australia, New Zealand, and Bali. I'm going to have a beer. I'm going to have two beers. After I finish, I'm going to have a Corona. I'm going to celebrate with the guys. I was in Nashville for the 4th of July two years ago. Like 100,000 people on Broadway. The whole street's closed down. There's a drone show and fireworks and an orchestral band playing.
I'm going to have a beer. You can make a night out better like that. The problem is when you don't have control over it. And it wasn't even I didn't have control. I did have control. I just knew that it was limiting the progress that I was making because I was hanging out of my ass once every two weeks. And that would mean that my diet got reset and I wasn't training for, you know, three days.
Slowly get back up. Fourth day training session kind of sucks. And then maybe I'll do some meditation. I'll journal and then I'm back up to speed. And just as I'm back up to speed, I reset back to the baseline. So... A lot of people, the progress that you're looking for is at the bottom of the glass that you're drinking. It's not a part of my life. I think I drank 10 times, 20 times last year.
I've drank 20 times so far this year. I'm halfway through the year and it's two beers. I'm still a strong advocate of the benefits of not drinking, but I'm not like an absolutist on it either. Paul Bishop 5999. What happened to the merch? It's right here. Look at this.
This.
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