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New Rory & MAL

Episode 120 | No Soap On Sundays

18 Nov 2022

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

0.031 - 3.575 Unknown

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human.

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4.536 - 14.927 Rory

Hey, you Dallas Cowboys. This is Rory. This is Maul. And we are coming to the Southside Music Hall November 19th. We hope that you get your tickets now. And I hope somebody bring me some vegan barbecue, Rory.

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14.967 - 19.072 Maul

Yes, unfortunately, as much as I love Dallas, I don't want to go there when the Cowboys are good, but here we are.

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19.392 - 31.246 Rory

The Cowboys are indeed playing very well so that nobody will be depressed. So let's come out and celebrate the Cowboys having a winning season for once in the last 57 years. Get your tickets now, please. See you, Cowboys, Cowgirls, and Cowdays. Houston.

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Chapter 2: How does the discussion about the Dallas Cowboys unfold?

31.266 - 37.034 Rory

We're coming to the Houston Improv November 20th. NewRoryInMall.com now. Get your tickets. Rory, this is like a homecoming, like you said.

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37.135 - 48.09 Maul

Yeah, we might need to be there for a week. Yeah, I think we need... I was thinking a month. I'm going to do some pop-ups at some hookah spots. Strip club. Work, of course. All work. For the pod. I want a pod at Onyx. Write it off on the taxes as a meeting. It's a work meeting.

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48.13 - 52.496 Rory

You can find me at camp for free. Houston Improv November 20th. Get your tickets now.

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52.736 - 54.118 Unknown

NewRoryInMall.

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78.415 - 84.122 Rory

Oh yes! Yes, yes, yes. Welcome to a new episode of the new Rory and Maul podcast.

84.142 - 89.527 Maul

I am Maul. I'm Damaris. The Maul side is becoming a thing, I think, to start these episodes. The Maul side?

89.547 - 101.458 Rory

Yeah, you kind of... It's kind of like when Wayne flicks his lighter. Yeah. Kind of like the same thing. I get it. You know what I mean? It's kind of like just letting people know where they're at, what they're listening to, get ready for this audio journey. Yes, the Jordan shrug, more or less.

101.478 - 109.485 Maul

Again, I don't want to get you... The LeBron powder. Oh, God. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't want to get you triggered. No. But...

109.87 - 115.884 Rory

Rare? What did I do in Atlanta? Let me think. Okay, yeah, I was in a strip club. That's rare.

Chapter 3: What triggers the debate about Michael Jordan's greatness?

268.173 - 268.413 Maul

I get it.

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268.734 - 278.269 Rory

I understand why he's the one talking on the records. I understand. I see what Lake is there for now, and I understand why Don just is never on camera or never on a microphone.

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278.249 - 285.917 Unknown

I get it. Don likes one and a half artists. Yeah. One and a half. It's only an artist and a half that he absolutely likes ever in the history of music.

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285.937 - 311.486 Rory

Cannon hates his own music. Is there anything in life that brings you joy? He has this insane ability to make you feel like the one artist that you just love and adore has zero talent. Yeah. Absolutely none. Has zero talent. I'm talking about, I was sitting there to the point where I was like, He might be right. This dude really might not be that good. He might not be that talented.

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311.506 - 333.367 Rory

And then I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not letting him do that. I'm not letting him do that. He made classic records seem like classic albums. Classic artist class. He made it seem like these guys have zero talent and that we've all been fooled. That's a talent to have that ability to speak like that and influence that type of feeling over somebody.

333.387 - 341.77 Rory

It's like if somebody just says, yo, no, it's not. The sky isn't blue. The sky is brown. You don't see it. And you're just like, you know what? You might be right. It might be brown.

341.75 - 352.508 Maul

I feel like Wack has taken the crown of Clubhouse. It'll never happen because Cannon will just be quiet unless you catch him in those rooms. He's not going to say these thoughts. Cannon would own Clubhouse.

354.091 - 369.118 Rory

Cannon would own Clubhouse. He'd give Wack a run for his money. He would be the greatest potter in history. Like, the shit that he says and actually makes you feel like he believes. And follow through with all of it. I would never repeat what he said. Same.

369.278 - 381.882 Rory

But when we were talking about who has bars and who doesn't, and he brought up that one bar, me and Terrence looked at each other like, there's no way he's trying to solidify his argument with that bar he just said.

Chapter 4: How does the conversation shift towards Grammy nominations?

989.246 - 996.895 Rory

Knock on wood. Hey, yo. I was supposed to go out with... So we had B. Simone and Meg at the show. Yes. In Atlanta.

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996.915 - 997.896 Maul

Thank y'all for coming out.

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998.637 - 1015.099 Rory

Did we recap that or no? Yeah, we recapped it in Atlanta. Days are blurred. I'm sorry. So B. Simone had hit me when we were at the studio. And they were trying to plan a dinner, her and Meg, me, you. They wanted us all to just go out and get some dinner while we was there last night. Okay. But then, you know, they were tired. They were staying home.

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1015.319 - 1036.239 Rory

I texted, I said, listen, we don't have to force it. Like Rory and I are not that pressed to go to dinner. Like it's okay. Were they going to pay? Um, I'm sure B and Meg would have picked up the check. They have no problem doing that. Oh man. Um, I was like, listen, because I just love the debates we were having. I canceled on two cool women. I was like, listen, Rory and I are fine.

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1036.62 - 1054.949 Rory

We don't need to go out to dinner. We're good where we're at. B was so happy to hear that. You can feel when somebody doesn't want to go out, but because you're in the city they live in, they're like, listen, I'll get up and go out, get dressed and meet y'all and we can go to dinner if y'all really want to. I'm like, listen, Rory and I, we're completely fine with not going out to eat.

1054.989 - 1055.65 Rory

It's all good.

1055.63 - 1068.713 Maul

I'm so good at being that person now because a lot of people are scared to say that. When you can tell in a text message when you're like, well, we could do some other time, like no pressure. Let's not do this. Yeah, we don't got to do this. I'm always the person that'll break all the tension. Who wants to say it first?

1068.733 - 1082.676 Rory

I can read the room. I know how to read the room over the phone. I can tell when you're in your home and you're comfortable on your couch watching TV, doing nothing, just chilling and like, damn, I got to get dressed. It was cold as fuck in Atlanta. Yeah. She would have had to shower. Yeah, she would have had to shower.

1082.696 - 1095.83 Rory

God knows, you know, if B has to get in the shower and wash that ass, she ain't going nowhere. And it wasn't a Thursday. Yeah, no, it definitely wasn't a Thursday. And Thursday's her shower day. Yeah, it was Monday. Sorry, B. You don't want to break her routine. But, um... So, me and B... Would have fucked up her whole shower schedule?

Chapter 5: What are the Grammy nominations for Best Melodic Rap Performance?

2795.735 - 2811.868 Maul

Because I think Jay fucking performed on that. So best melodic rap performance. Like rap song, I would say Churchill Down or Heart Part 5. And then save Drake, Future, and Thames for best rap melodic song. Just my opinion. Okay.

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2813.569 - 2828.183 Maul

Best melodic rap performance, Khaled, Future, SZA, Beautiful, Underrated Record, Future, Drake, Thames, Jack Harlow, First Class, Kendrick, Blast, Die Hard, Lotto, Big Energy. I think Harlow wins that melodic rap performance.

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2829.479 - 2835.882 Unknown

I mean, yeah. First class? Wait for you? No, I know. Wait for you is fire. Don't get it twisted. I love that.

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Chapter 6: How do the hosts feel about Jack Harlow's chances at the Grammys?

2835.902 - 2840.929 Unknown

And the definition of melodic. Jack is winning one of these. He has to win. Jack is winning one of these. Oh, for sure.

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2840.969 - 2846.816 Rory

He's either winning best rap song, best melodic rap performance, or best rap album. I'd give him melodic. He's winning one of those.

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2847.057 - 2859.072 Unknown

I can't. I mean, they could. The album might be too much smoke. I don't know. The Grammy deals with backlash. I mean, listen. They could sneak him one of these.

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Chapter 7: What are the implications of Kodak Black's response to 21 Savage?

2859.172 - 2861.916 Unknown

The melodic or the rap song. I think he wins melodic.

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2862.065 - 2866.933 Maul

I mean, not for nothing. First Class. Lotto Big Energy. If that won too, I wouldn't be mad.

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2867.013 - 2875.487 Rory

Bro. That wasn't one of the best melodic rap performances? I'm not saying it wasn't. But First Class and Big Energy over Wait For You is blasphemy.

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Chapter 8: What tragic event involving Virginia football players is discussed?

2875.788 - 2878.753 Rory

I think Wait For You is number one that should win that. We not doing that.

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2878.773 - 2881.838 Maul

But First Class, I'm not mad at that winning best melodic rap performance.

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2881.918 - 2886.165 Rory

I'm not mad either. But I'm just saying, over Wait For You? Watch it happen.

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2886.5 - 2887.601 Unknown

Look, it's... It's going to be crazy.

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2887.621 - 2891.685 Rory

Wait For You is either going to win... Wait For You is one of the best songs we've heard in the last few years.

2891.705 - 2908.943 Unknown

Oh, yeah. It's an honor song. Let's just be honest. To Rory's point, though, it is a melodic song. Yeah. So I could see it winning that, beating First Class, but on rap song, I could see Churchill Downs taking it. That's crazy. Over the Heart Part 5, over Wait For You, they're not going to give Wait For You both. Yeah. Yeah, they're not going to give it.

2908.963 - 2922.646 Rory

So eliminate Wait For You from one of these categories. Churchill Downs being a better rap song than Wait For You or fucking... Even Push and P. Well, look, you got to think logistically. Push and P was crazy.

2922.867 - 2926.637 Maul

Mo, Churchill Downs is a better rap song than Push and P. I'm not saying it's not.

2926.677 - 2929.886 Rory

I'm not saying it's not, but we're not going to just ignore Push and P, though.

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