Chapter 1: What humorous story does Mal share about crossing the Canadian border?
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I saw when they brought Lil Nas X. to that.
Oh, that was a great clip.
I thought that was great because that song is positive. Wait, where did they bring Little Nas X? It wasn't like he was an assless chaps.
He went to a grade school, like a fifth, fourth grade classroom.
The way Little Nas X dresses now, he wouldn't, I don't think he would dress that way.
What? No, he wouldn't do that in front of kids anyway.
Yeah, I don't think he would dress like that. And even if he was out, I highly doubt he was going to tell all his kindergarteners.
No, he's not going to do that in front of kids. Assless chaps.
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Chapter 2: What issues arise when trying to cross the Canadian border?
Now, if you've ever crossed the border, Whenever they say, go over here. You should just do a U-turn. Yeah, like you should get out the car. Go to your original destination. Run back to America, right? So I'm like, all right. We pull over. So it's me, my mom, my sister, my cousin, and my nephew. So we pull over, whatever. So no big deal, whatever. They search the car really quick.
So the officers see, like, oh, you were in the global entry lane. He's like, well, do you know that that's an infringement? You can be fined for that. My sister was like, no, when I called and got my global entry done, they were saying that anybody that I'm traveling with can also come with me through global entry. So he was like, oh, well, if you're flying...
you can have you and maybe a companion can go through. Yeah, not a car full of people. Not your entire family. That makes more sense to me, though, if the driver has global entry to go through than if we're flying together. Yeah. I think the car should allow a full carload of people. You would think so, right? So, whatever. They search the car. Of course, there's nothing in the car.
They take our passports. They go inside. So they say, hey, we only need one of you to come in. Like, everybody else can just wait in the car. So I go in. I'm like, all right. So my sister, my cousin, my mom, everybody, my nephew goes back in the car. I go inside the whatever you call it. I go inside the building. The guy reeking of the reg. Yeah. I go inside the building.
So when I go inside, the guy says... is that your mom? So I was like, yeah. He was like, yeah, I need your mom to come in. So I'm like, is he treating me like a child? Like I'm not, I can't like, you know what I mean? You look great for your age. So I'm like, okay. You have to be accompanied by an adult. So I go back to the car. I'm like, hey, I feel like such a loser.
I'm like, hey mom, they say you have to go in. So she's like, all right. So my mom doesn't want to go in. She's like, all right, I'll go in. She goes in. So we can see my mom from outside when we're in the car because it's like glass. The whole building is basically glass. So we see her in there. She's talking to the officer.
you could automatically tell in my mom's body language, something is not right. So I'm like, what's going on? My mom has crossed this Canadian border at least 50 times. So I'm like- That's the problem. Yeah. I'm something like, all right. She a runner. I'm like, she's a mule. They think my mom's a mule. So I'm like, all right. So whatever. They're about maybe five minutes of talking.
You'll see the officer walking away. My mom's still trying to talk to him. She was probably wearing Griselda merch. That's what threw it off.
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Chapter 3: What unexpected problem does Mal's mom face at the border?
She actually looks like Griselda. So automatically I'm thinking like, what the hell, what could he be talking to my mother about? So as my mother's coming out of the building, I see her face and she's crying. Oh. Never fun. So I'm like, so now, you know, I'm going into a mode of, what the fuck did this dude just say to my mom that she comes out of the building and she's crying?
So I'm like, what happened? She's like, they said I can't go. I can't come into Canada. I was like, what? I was like, why not? Like, what happened? Something on my name, on my file, is that I had an assault back in 1973. Happy 50th anniversary to hip hop. I believe that is the year that hip hop was born. I believe the assault at Kool Herc's party is what they were referring to.
Your mom shut the party down. Yeah, I'm like, 1973? I'm like, what are you talking about? She was like, I don't have no idea. My mom has never been arrested. She had no idea what this officer was talking about. She was like, somebody probably used my name years ago. We thought it was my aunt. My aunt, rest in peace. She was wild in the streets. So she probably got arrested one night.
Didn't probably have warrants and wanted to get out of it and gave the cops my mother's name. This is what we're thinking. Yeah. So I'm like, oh, my God. I hate that person that doesn't have the fake name ready and gives someone else's name.
Well, another family member.
Well, it's my aunt. Her and my mom obviously look alike. So, you know, back in 1970, I'm not sure what the technology was. If pictures would pop up on a computer, if they even had a computer at the jail. I don't know. So we're thinking like this had to be my aunt. My mom has never been arrested. She has no idea what this officer is talking about.
So I go in and I'm like, well, let me try to talk to this guy just to see what's going on. Because like I said, my mom has crossed this border plenty of times. So I go in there automatically. He doesn't even want to talk to me. He's like, I'm not at something, something to disclose that information.
I'm like, wait, that's my, I'm not coming in here asking about somebody else that's trying to get through the border. I'm talking about my mom that's in the car with me. Like, why is she not being allowed in? So then my mom comes in and she was like, this has to be a mistake. Like I've never been arrested, whatever, whatever, whatever.
So now I'm thinking like we just drove all the way to this border. Now we're going to have to drive all the way back to the city. You're having PTSD and deja vu. Of when me and my cousin tried to get through the border. So I'm like, oh my God. 0 for 2 with Montreal. This is crazy. So we go back to the car. Going to get you an exposed jersey.
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Chapter 4: How do the hosts react to the story about the border crossing?
They don't fuck around at the Canadian border. They do not fuck around. The most nerve-wracking time is going to Toronto for me. The UK, and I don't have anything but maybe unpaid parking tickets is the most I have in my record period, but I just know how Canada gives it up. They'll find any way to send you back to Buffalo Airport.
I was surprised the last time I went to Toronto how easy it was going through customs. Because now sometimes you don't even have to go see the agent. When you scan your passport, it does its thing. It does its thing and it lets you through and you just walk through and get your luggage. That was the first... I had never experienced not talking to an agent trying to get into Canada.
When I went to... Where was it? Was it France? Same day. It was weird. I was like expecting to talk to someone and like have to explain.
When we went to London, I don't think I went to London too. I was pissed. You was the only one that had to talk to an agent. No, no, I didn't.
I didn't get the stamp. In London, we didn't get stamped. I got stamped. I never had a UK stamp.
That's what it was. So did you get stamped? No. I didn't get a stamp either. I was so upset. Okay, that's racist, number one. I'm the only, because I'm the darkest guy here. Wow. I had to go see an agent. Yes, we walked together and then mine went through and the doors just, you know. Come on, whites. Like, they just opened up. Welcome home, lad. Welcome home, slave. We got you now. Welcome back.
We put a chip in you years ago. We knew you'd find your way back. Go tinker over there. It's weird that their railroad system is called the Underground. That's shit. But, uh... So your aunt is a liar is what the family was thinking. So my aunt, she passed away, but she definitely was wild. So we just threw it on her.
We just assumed that she had got arrested one night and gave the police my mom's name. Because like I said, my mom had never been arrested. I don't know how true the story is because my cousin is a liar. He lived in St. Louis for a lot of his childhood. There was a producer. I think his name was J.E. that produced for Nelly. Okay. I'm pretty sure Nelly used to shout him out.
I could have his name wrong, but I'm pretty sure it was J.E. Yeah, you're right.
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Chapter 5: What are the implications of allowing artists like Sexyy Red to perform in schools?
All she's doing is visiting the school. I'm not even putting this just to a woman that's singing about her vagina. I don't think male rappers that are talking about shooting people should perform in high school. Male rappers talking about shooting people and her talking about her asshole are two different things.
I love that there's no gray area.
Chapter 6: How do societal standards differ for male and female artists in schools?
There's a gray area somehow. Assholes and bullets.
Assholes and guns. Look at the culture. That's hip hop. That's not hip hop. That is hip hop now. Incredible entrance. It's a double bird. Yeah, double bird with the big blood with the big bees. I guess that's what she threw up. I don't know. I only say that As a response, because that's what people were saying.
Like, oh, she can't sing about her pussy, but the guys can go to high schools that sing about shooting people.
Chapter 7: What is the impact of mental health on today's streaming culture?
I'm saying all of it is bad. I mean, all of it is not the greatest thing ever, but like... She then said she donated a bunch of... like prom clothes and makeup because she didn't have that. She remembered, which I thought was great. That's awesome. I think that should be the story. Yeah. Great. That should be the story. Yeah. Don't perform. Oh, come on. Go to school.
How are you not going to have her perform? And you would want, I'm not even going to make it gender specific.
Chapter 8: How does the discussion of marriage and divorce relate to personal fulfillment?
You would want your kid at 14 years old to go into their high school and have a woman singing about her booty hole and her vagina and after leaving health class when you're going through puberty? If my kid can handle it, yes.
The kids are listening to this anyway. They're going to listen. This is going to come up on TikTok no matter what.
I'm with you, but why in school? This is a special treat for the kids, yo. Let me show my age. When I was in high school, if George Washington Carver would have made peanut butter. No, but seriously, if Snoop would have came to my school.
Okay.
and started, so my bitches ain't shit, but hoes and tricks. That's awful. My mother would have called the principal the next day.
What's different about her pussy and her booty hole?
It's still pussy and ass.
She ain't talking about it.
I get the theme is fucked up. It's just the content. It's like, I don't want my kid to, you understand what I'm saying? It's just like, I know my mom would have flipped out if Snoop came in and told him out.
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