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New Rory & MAL

Episode 445 | Send Help

22 Jan 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.031 - 21.018 Unknown

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. I'm Daniel Alarcón, and this is my friend who's much more famous than I am. I wouldn't go that far, but I'm John Green, co-host of the podcast The Away End with my old friend Daniel. On our podcast The Away End, we'll share with you the magic of international football, all leading up to the 2026 World Cup.

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21.178 - 41.968 Unknown

Together, we'll find out why, of all the unimportant things, football, soccer, is the most important. Listen to The Away End with Daniel Alarcon and John Green on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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43.906 - 64.061 Rory

All right, a little bit of a rolling start. We had a guest cancel due to some things I totally understand. Yeah. Getting jammed up with. Had a guest canceled. That's why Baby D's not here either. But I mean, let's shoot the shit and have an episode. I love shooting the shit with you, Rory. Yeah, man. Let's get to know each other. Welcome back. Middle of the week. Yes, yes.

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64.081 - 67.507 Mal

We are powered by Boost. I love the middle of the week, Rory. I don't know why.

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67.667 - 68.749 Rory

You're a hump day guy?

70.552 - 89.164 Mal

Yes. I was trying to find a joke in it somewhere, but yes, I am. I am a middle of the week type of guy. Why? I don't know. It's kind of like, you know, when you like, on a flight or a trip somewhere, and you go take a nap, you wake up, you look at the little map, see where you're at, and you're halfway there, you know that feeling you get? That's what I get on Wednesdays.

89.524 - 107.325 Rory

It's only a countdown from here, more or less. Like this, man. We almost through. Tuesday and Wednesday are pretty much the most useless weeks as far as excitement goes, but I hear you. I mean, unless you're in New York City where they try to make every night some special club. Tuesday is ladies' night. New York is really good at just making days that don't matter matter.

107.305 - 116.69 Rory

But speaking of naps, I mean, I think this is the best topic to start with. You said you took a nap for the first time in a decade. I took a nap for the first time. Not a decade. Learning so much about you.

Chapter 2: Why is managing artists more challenging than expected?

116.77 - 130.542 Rory

I took a nap for the first time in almost two years yesterday. Incredible. With a kid, man, any type of free time I have, I'll take it. Well, yeah, people with kids. I'll take a 10 minute nap standing up. Like I'll nap in our lounge.

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130.562 - 148.028 Mal

I'm talking about like one of those naps where like you get like over like two hours. Okay. Like I had one of those. I had one of those yesterday, man. But I got up early. I had to get up like really early yesterday and move around a little bit. Then I got back home around like three. Okay. Four o'clock. I was done. I woke up. It was like eight o'clock.

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148.97 - 158.587 Mal

I woke up before that, but then, like, I got out of the bed at 8. And then it's like, what do you do now? Like, what do you do at 8 p.m. if you already took a nap? You're walking around, no kids. Like, what do you do at 8 p.m. if you just wake up to an empty house?

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158.888 - 181.181 Rory

Yeah. I mean, I'm getting fully on Amara's schedule now. Like, when she's down at 8.39, I'll usually knock out right at that time. It's been tough for me to stay up past 10 lately. Yeah. Like... in a crazy way. What is sleep anymore to a parent though? Like what is, does sleep exist? Well, I mean, tomorrow will be three in a few weeks. The first year there was nonexistent.

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181.201 - 201.589 Rory

I don't even know what that, I don't even know how human beings function as parents in the first year. I don't even know how I got through that. Now it's, it's, it's regular now. It's just back to a schedule when you were younger. Like you just on your kid's schedule. So it's not that crazy. I did go out last night though. Where you went? I went to the... Yo, you be secretly outside, man.

202.193 - 212.225 Mal

You be trying to act like it's just daddy daycare. It is. You run out the door when we're done recording to go pick up Amar. But you don't ever talk about when you drop Amar and put Amar to bed.

212.646 - 223.019 Rory

You definitely back out of the driveway and hit the streets. So I have been very honest about my one day being Sunday. Yesterday wasn't Sunday. I'm aware. Can I finish? I feel like I'm being attacked.

223.039 - 225.602 Mal

I feel like I'm in family therapy right now. Yes.

225.582 - 250.476 Rory

this is what therapy feels like um so usually i have sunday and then we record mondays but sometimes i'll have like monday after work yeah that shift got switched that kia did with a tuesday one so whereas remember i had to run out of here at like 3 30 yesterday had to get out of here so tuesday i had free time when i usually don't because kia was off on a tuesday when she's usually not yeah so okay

Chapter 3: What does a pod glamping trip entail?

287.264 - 309.656 Rory

And I texted Neil. I said, Hey, I see it sold out. Is there any, um, tickets available? He said, yeah, just send me, send me names. I said, okay. I'll be by myself. And he's like, all right, cool. I get to the front door where the list is. And she goes, name, please. I said, Rory Farrell. She goes, looks through, said, okay, Rory Farrell plus zero. Plus zero.

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310.237 - 332.422 Rory

Let everybody know you have no friends. Well, I swear to God, I even, I even texted Neil. Plus zero. I texted Neil. I said, uh, Her saying plus zero did wonders for my self-esteem. I almost told her, yeah, but I have friends. You can't find anybody. He said you should have just paid the $10.

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332.623 - 336.387 Mal

You can't find anybody to go with you to a top secret.

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336.407 - 356.61 Rory

It was, it was so last minute, like doors were at seven 30. I texted Neil at like six 15 or something like that. So I wasn't going to rush to try to get someone. I mean, comedy shows, you can watch those by yourself. Like you're not like talking for sure. For sure. And it was cool. It was cool to kick it with Neil and Andrew and everyone. No, it was a good time. It was a good solo date.

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356.63 - 374.488 Rory

And they started the show at 8 o'clock. I was in bed by 1030. So they're there working on new material. It's all. They were like literally reading off their phones of like shit they jotted down that day. Like, you know, starting out bits to see what something. And they'll literally be like, well, that didn't work. Let me erase that. It's like watching them do the early process. That's dope.

374.508 - 386.683 Rory

It was like really interesting. Is that something that they've always done in comedy or is this something new? I don't think new material night is something that's like brand new, but I haven't seen it really advertised in New York like that, but I could be wrong.

386.743 - 401.703 Mal

I've seen comedians like tell the audience, like I'm trying material tonight. Like I've seen that, but like a night dedicated to comedians, literally like reading off a paper, stuff that they just jotted down and wrote. Like, I don't know if I've ever heard about that.

401.903 - 423.309 Rory

Yeah. And I mean, it was definitely like the NYU crowd. I think they even had a student discount or whatever, but yeah. It was nice to see like younger people not on their phone. Like nobody was, I've been to shows where like they literally lock your phone in the back. I've been to the Chappelle shit at Radio City and those are the best shows because they have no worries about anything.

424.711 - 434.285 Rory

Some of the kids had phones and shit and nobody did anything. I was so happy to see that. Like they respected what was going on on stage rather than trying to catch a moment. Yeah. Because they were saying some wild shit.

Chapter 4: How does being stranded affect sexual desires?

667.625 - 671.851 Rory

Everyone has a common goal there. And, I mean, if they'll have us, I'm down to go.

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672.192 - 691.165 Mal

I can't tell you. It's funny you said that. I can't tell you how many times people have just in conversation approached me about, yo, why you and Rory don't, like, curate parties and DJ and manage? They want us to manage. Like, why y'all don't have artists that y'all manage? Well... See how you just laughed? Same reaction. Me managing.

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691.265 - 705.344 Mal

So I'm like, yo, bro, it has to be a person that has just, first of all, they have to be a grown adult. Like you have to have some type of like adulthood about yourself. I'm not managing no young artists because that's babysitting. You know how that goes.

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705.364 - 713.215 Rory

Yeah. Well, I mean, starting with the party and event thing, I did that for a decade at its highest level period. And I know.

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713.235 - 717.12 Mal

You don't miss it? P, you don't miss it?

718.028 - 742.264 Rory

every day all right you have to be more specific yeah ask me what i missed okay all right that's fair what do you miss what i think p is speaking to is probably what i'm speaking to as far as like i miss it every day yeah what do you miss about about uh palooza uh

744.522 - 759.66 Rory

Probably the camaraderie, which some of it ended up to being a false sense of camaraderie, but I still will honor the moments and what they were and what I thought they were at the time and still look at them with love. See, that's therapy. You don't even see, you don't even understand. You don't even know how that goes. I'm waiting for the real answer.

759.68 - 762.543 Rory

It's not going to take away from the memories that I had. Yeah.

762.583 - 765.687 Mal

Don't live like people, but you know that.

Chapter 5: What are the implications of a Matt Damon vs Ben Affleck Verzuz?

798.034 - 818.961 Rory

Like, we were just hoping to break even and have as much fun as we possibly could and have create the most memories that we could. And that I miss that shit for sure. Yeah. Of just like, all right, we got one, we have one show in Houston on Saturday. How about we go in on Tuesday and leave next Thursday? Yeah. Love setting it up like that. Love routing it like that. Yeah.

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819.061 - 838.924 Rory

Like that, that stuff I do miss. And just like, you know, a group of 12 people, um, you get 12 different stories from that weekend. Like everybody went different perspectives. It's just in regrouping when you get back home of like, yeah, I miss that type of, of shit for sure.

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839.245 - 861.469 Rory

But as far as like throwing events and the stress of that, like we, speaking of Houston, when Drake says that line, when he went to warehouse, like, uh, is bun coming? Is anybody coming? Yeah. Like the, the stress of that in, in new markets and like, dude, that stuff is, Again, we weren't out there trying to make a lot of money, but I wasn't trying to lose money. I was making fucking...

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861.837 - 886.894 Rory

75 grand at Havas living in New York city and like dumping money into that. Like, yeah, there were, there were days like, well, this fails. We better hope that that Coney Island, uh, like lets us eat for the next month. So that stuff I don't miss. And it's stressful with the liability. It's just a lot with events and it's a young man's game. Yeah. I couldn't do that shit in my thirties at all.

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887.154 - 912.06 Rory

It's, it's fun. That should be for younger people too. to handle for sure. Now the management side, I mean, EO is, is emotional orange is, is easy for the, for the most part. They're, they're so self-reliant and like, it's so in-house, like they, they're a dream. If I could have 10 emotional oranges, I would manage way more, but that's not how the case is. Management, I wouldn't want to

913.087 - 932.783 Rory

I wouldn't wanna sell an artist short because it's their life at the end of the day. And you're managing their livelihood, their dream, everything embodying what they're trying to do with their brand. And that's not something you should take lightly if you wanna be a manager. You're fucking with somebody's life at the end of the day. And if you can't fully put your life into that,

933.404 - 940.653 Rory

you're doing them a disservice and yourself a disservice. Like management needs to be all in. You can't half-ass management. Yeah.

940.693 - 957.713 Mal

That's one reason why I always stayed away from it. Cause I know what it takes. Like, and you know, I obviously watched my brothers do it all these years. Like it consumes you like your every thought every day. Like no matter, even if you're not, you know, and I say it even with us, like even if we're not in the studio, we're working, we're on a call, we're on an email.

Chapter 6: Which two artists would create a dope joint album together?

957.733 - 962.258 Mal

It's like, so now imagine if you have that, then you have artists careers that you're responsible for.

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962.618 - 987.925 Rory

Yeah. But then I am just a hypocrite because everything I just said, I, I go against that. And my friend Jay Electronica is like, yo, you want to manage me on some of these projects? But again, that's more friendship stuff. And Jay is going to do what he wants to. I'll work when you're ready to work type of thing. Whereas younger artists where you're kind of in like that early grind.

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988.125 - 1017.604 Rory

You need to, I'm locked up. You need to be on the ground with them everywhere. We need to go everywhere. Jay's a different example there. Jay's not trying to be outside. Jay's not trying to run with brand deals. He wants to put out music, and I can assist in the logistics of that type of stuff. But the younger artists, I don't have the bandwidth. I'd feel like... I was doing wrong towards them.

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1017.624 - 1038.403 Rory

If I was like, yeah, I'll manage you. You'd be this low on my priority list. And it just, yeah, I can't do that. And I think people really think managed. Cause I get a lot of people just DM me artists. That's they don't even know, like, not like, yo, this is my mans, but like, yo, this person's really dope. You should manage them. I'm like, I just don't think you understand what that means.

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1038.483 - 1064.026 Rory

It's not me co-signing it on the pod. Like, listen to this. That is like this big in that entire thing. And, Also, cosigns on the pod are kind of whatever because we always try to highlight music we like or listen to every episode. That cosign shit behind the scenes, I only have so many certain favors with certain people. Like when I put a stamp on something... all right, I got you on this one.

1064.487 - 1083.609 Rory

They better be night. Like that's also a risk when you're playing the politic game as a manager, you can't, you can't just come with some shit that may, may work. Like they are, they cool, but they're not taking their self, their self as serious. Like they got a good record, but I could tell in the studio, they don't have good work ethic. Like they're not going to follow up on this.

1083.669 - 1112.62 Rory

Now I'm wasting favors. Like that's a whole nother politic game with, with management. That's just rough. Yeah. Like, Yeah, I don't know. And listen, 10 to 20%, artists are starving with 100% of their money. Yeah, that's a lot of work for a small percentage of what you're getting at if this is something that you feel is still unproven. Like, I don't know, but I mean, you should do it.

1112.6 - 1140.463 Mal

with that being said give it a shot nah I'm cool Roy you know I don't have the patience for that but I do help you know certain artists wherever I can but I don't put yeah I don't the whole managing I don't want that like if you need something and I'm able to you know use my resources and access to help you then I'll do that with no questions asked but as far as like day to day being your actual man I just that sounds scary like even with EO and like the beginning stages like

1140.832 - 1166.449 Rory

I'm going to fucking Staten Island with my own $10,000 in cash, pulling up on Ghostface and COVID. Like I don't have, that's at 35 and everything I have going on. I don't have that type of mentality for a new artist at this point. Not the, not the passion is still there, but I'm not, I'm not doing that. Yeah, nah. Like, I'm not staying in the studio until 4 a.m.

Chapter 7: What are the benefits of invite-only events?

1348.41 - 1353.535 Rory

Yeah, like nature. But that's something that happens when you travel.

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1353.635 - 1373.718 Mal

When you're fortunate enough to travel and visit different places and things like that, that's what sparks that mindset. Like, You start going, like, wait, hold up. You start seeing how people live and, you know, how they don't need all of the things that you feel like you need once you live in New York City. It's like they're comfortable, they're happy, they're peaceful.

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1373.758 - 1387.436 Mal

Kids are going to great schools and being productive in life. That's when those things start to manifest. But if you don't, if you're a person that doesn't travel outside of where you grew up and where you're from, you really don't know life outside of, you know, where you're from.

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1387.576 - 1412.802 Rory

And even in like my early adulthood life, on my own being here, I fully understand anyone outside looking in. I see in the comments of real estate videos and everything, like, why the fuck would you live in a closet for $3,500? You guys are right, but I would never ever trade anything for my 20s in New York City in those closets for that price.

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1412.822 - 1417.888 Rory

There's no dollar amount that could compare to what that was like. I would never...

1417.868 - 1447.774 Rory

ever take any of those moments back or change anything in that regard now going into my 40s yeah it's different fuck no yeah but it is still the greatest place on earth it's an experience that no if you spent your 20s outside in rural shit i respect it and do whatever makes you happy but i could never have that experience in my 20s i needed this for the first part of my life yeah second half listen man i listen i might open a beach bar in key west who knows

1449.779 - 1473.029 Rory

But I'm getting the fuck out of here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel you, man. I'm with you on that 100%. And I just... Which we briefly talked about probably more off the mic. Forget the New York City mentality. Just the American mentality that we share of like how nuts it would be to just leave... the U S and how dumb of a thought that that is.

1473.55 - 1491.934 Rory

Meanwhile, anyone that grew up in Europe, I will live in Spain for a year. Like you just move around different because you don't have that mentality that you were taught that this is the greatest place you have to stay here. You'd be nuts to everything's here. When you, it's only inconvenience when you leave, they try to market it that way. And that's nuts to me. Yeah.

1492.575 - 1507.998 Rory

Like the thought of taking your kids and be like, no, I think they should, do elementary school in Europe is a foreign thought to people with money in the United States. Now we're only staying here. That's something that I'm starting to grow out of too. Like I don't have to stay in the United States. You don't have to.

Chapter 8: How do personal experiences shape views on parenting?

1871.057 - 1888.993 Rory

Sit by the bonfire. See, this is the, y'all are joking. I'm not, this is some shit that I like. I brought it up. I said, this is what I want to do. I'm not joking. No, but not just to pot about it. Like, this is something I would like really want to do. That's, bro. I want to live like that. We told him I want to do that. Like, I don't want, I want to live like that.

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1889.133 - 1902.825 Mal

Yeah. That's what I'm saying. He's parking his camper in front of my driveway as we speak. Living the life, man. Free. Yeah, man. We should do, we got to do that. We got to make that happen, man. This year, 2026, we making a glamping, glamping pod happen. Um,

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1902.805 - 1929.508 Rory

I'll find the one that, that I did for Christmas, but that one was great, but I feel like maybe we could find one that would be more suitable to, to potting, but it was definitely a cool, cool experience. Uh, Bay's almost died a thousand times, but what happened? Basically is not really cut out for the cat skills. She doesn't, she doesn't have the cat skill legs up on it. She's a cat.

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1930.629 - 1949.459 Rory

It's not even a dog. That's a cute ass cat. Yo, your dog doesn't know how to handle the forest. Cause no, you really in the casket. And it's right on a lake. There was a waterfall, which was, we had a cabin right next to the waterfall. I do rain noises at night for me to go to sleep. Didn't need that. You don't need that up there. Fucking beautiful. Yeah.

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1949.98 - 1961.837 Rory

Nah, bays on, cause you right on the mountain. It was winter time. There's ice. Yeah. Baze had a rough time. That's so funny. She went from the excited dog that she was to like, I'm going back to the cabin.

1961.877 - 1967.406 Mal

Yeah, I'm hearing shit. I'm smelling things I never smelled before. It's a bear close by.

1968.227 - 1984.703 Rory

And she's usually exploring. When I was on the grill, she was on my leg like you... living on my leg. I was like, yeah, no, you're a beautiful snack to everyone out here. Like if humans didn't exist, multi-foods would like, they should thank us every day. You would be a snack in a heartbeat.

1984.723 - 1991.537 Mal

That is so funny, man. You got to take, you got to take a pit bull up there. Can't take a multi-pool to the forest. I mean, even a pit bull would do that.

1992.648 - 2012.662 Rory

some of the shit out there would have, would have some trouble. Oh yeah. A hundred percent. Um, I don't even know how we got down, down the glamping path, but, um, I know Woodstock has some like areas like that out there. Oh, I mean, that could be fun. Yeah. Do you know the band Phony People from Brooklyn? I know some phony people from Brooklyn. I don't know the band. Great band, Phony People.

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