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New Rory & MAL

New Rory & Mal: Best of 2025 | Part 1

26 Dec 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

0.031 - 14.05 Unknown

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. The Volume. Wait, now, hold on, because I have a, we have our first voicemail submission for the Valentine's Day.

0

14.931 - 21.219 Damaris

Really? Oh, we starting out the gate? I thought we were going to play them all on Valentine's Day. Should we give a little, just a little tease for people to still submit?

0

21.239 - 22.882 Unknown

You want to play them all on Valentine's Day?

0

23.262 - 25.465 Damaris

Well, no, we can tease this one.

0

25.799 - 53.68 Damaris

because there's still another week really good and like like we just gonna not like consider it for like no it could set the tone that everyone that comes after this is trash okay i like this could set the tone now you're using your fucking this could be a promo i'm with that for the first one but you guys do still have shit two weeks almost yeah to submit no it ends you have until february 11th yes okay february 11th so you have some time you even have a weekend right you have a week

53.896 - 71.284 Unknown

Yeah. Got a week. I got to write my freestyle. Y'all can write y'all shit to take me and Marl out. They were upset. I wrote one of the rules that we came up with is that, you know, you can't try to shoot. There's only one submission per person. So you can't try to shoot at me and shoot at Marl. Like the buys, they can't try to get both of us.

71.585 - 73.588 Damaris

Yeah. You have to pick a gender. Yeah.

73.828 - 74.79 Unknown

I said pick a struggle.

76.002 - 76.923 Damaris

Pick a struggle.

Chapter 2: What are the rules for the Valentine's Day submissions?

151.079 - 181.104 Unknown

This is a serial killer. A nice Merlot. Okay. And this is a poem entitled Merlot for Baby D. Okay. Is it me or is it the place where we amidst fields of plum and oak shimmering texture bends with agility as you dance subtly I spin you watching earnestly.

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181.324 - 182.105 Damaris

You say supply?

0

182.266 - 206.179 Unknown

Lay except low from origin, finishing at eternity. Your bouquet's fragrance and the anticipation of your taste moves man's palace to thirst. Eager to draw your full body closer to me. He said he was eager. Ride my tongue, sweetness. He went left.

0

209.281 - 217.876 Mal

I am... Yeah, the cops just raided his house. Maul. They kicked the door in. Maul.

0

222.264 - 223.766 Damaris

You wasn't feeling his wine tasting?

224.708 - 225.049 Mal

Yo.

225.069 - 226.952 Damaris

Damaris is the vineyard in that...

227.708 - 251.202 Rory

you didn't catch the he sent my bouquets fragrance yo come on now yo man oh my god baby i was crushing grapes i will never let baby d go anywhere with that man are you kidding me stop no because i do want people to send in good poems baby d i don't want people to send good poems or two that wasn't a good poem yes it was it was a good poem it was the delivery made me what was good about that poem

252.397 - 261.533 Damaris

He had some entendres, but let me check my pedophile app. What? What's his name and address? Because he's definitely on that shit.

Chapter 3: How does the voicemail submission unfold?

271.39 - 299.388 Rory

He had a wet dream. But he was awake. Ride my tongue. So he nutted. Ride my tongue. Eight piece clip that. Ride my tongue, sweetness. Ride my tongue. Is this Bubba from Forrest Gump? Ride my tongue, sweetness. Sounds like junk coffee. Yo, it's some sick niggas in the world, man. I'm telling you.

0

299.408 - 301.994 Unknown

You can't make fun of the, people aren't going to want to submit.

0

302.314 - 304.88 Rory

All right, I'm sorry. Yo, that was amazing, dog. You got to send like.

0

305.221 - 316.428 Damaris

If we genius that and like get the lyrics, he was talking some shit. It's just how he presented it was a little creepy. All right, so that's what I'm laughing at. I don't think it was creepy. He called a voicemail.

0

316.448 - 330.396 Rory

Baby, this is how you end up on the 10 o'clock news because you don't think this shit is creepy. Well, we, how, no, this is what I'm saying. You're going to walk right into it. Okay, what time you want to pick me up? Whoop, right upside your fucking ass. Now you in the trunk in a fucking glad fucking garbage bag.

330.376 - 335.323 Unknown

Well, he's not. What I'm saying is it wasn't like it was uninvited. We told him to write a poem.

335.343 - 336.204 Rory

Yeah, with some Riz.

336.224 - 341.231 Unknown

With some Riz. If you want to take me out. He called the number and did what we asked him to do.

341.271 - 349.903 Rory

Yeah, but we didn't actually put that filter on there. That's his voice. Ride my tongue, sweetness. What is that shit? Ride my tongue, sweetness.

Chapter 4: What themes emerge from the voicemail content?

411.6 - 417.255 Rory

Who going to be riding my tongue? Who going to beat that? He on time and he got straight to it.

0

417.857 - 424.649 Damaris

And if you've been to a winery, there was some wordplay there. He went kind of crazy. He called her Plum and Oak.

0

425.03 - 425.772 Rory

Plum and Oak.

0

426.233 - 438.533 Damaris

You know what I think this is? I think this is hate. Because I don't think I've went through the voicemails. Is there any for Maul yet? They're all for Baby D. Not any for Maul yet. You can't even get these chicks to rhyme. Yo. Thank y'all. Appreciate it.

0

438.774 - 440.818 Rory

Appreciate it.

440.838 - 442.562 Damaris

Yeah. You can't even get the fellas to rhyme for you.

442.582 - 444.346 Rory

I'm cool. Thank you. This is America.

445.148 - 449.398 Damaris

Will you listen to any of the poems that the fellas sent for you though?

449.418 - 452.505 Unknown

For the merch. It don't gotta be a date, but for the gift.

Chapter 5: What are the challenges of meeting a long-lost child?

2323.755 - 2331.889 Rory

Like a daughter, your daughter being 25, that's the first time you meet her. I think that's way more awkward than a father meeting his 25 year old son for the first time.

0

2331.869 - 2334.153 Unknown

Are you afraid you're going to be attracted to her?

0

2334.193 - 2343.769 Rory

No, no, no. It's not that. It's just... It's like, yo, she's a grown woman. It's kind of like she... You know, women are different. Like, y'all have y'all... Once y'all reach a certain age, it's like y'all are who y'all are.

0

Chapter 6: How does the dynamic differ between raising sons and daughters?

2344.57 - 2361.874 Rory

With a son, it's like you can kind of, you know, talk to him differently, give him different advice. With a woman, it's like... Why even try to give a woman advice, right? No, but her mom, look, you look great. You got a good job. Mom did a great job. Like, I don't, what do you mean? We could try to develop a relation, but it's going to be awkward. It's your offspring.

0

2361.954 - 2363.375 Rory

Like, that's your, that's part of you.

0

2363.576 - 2372.787 Unknown

I don't think, I don't, yes, obviously it's going to be awkward, but eventually awkwardness goes away once you get to know her. Like, y'all might have things in common. Y'all might like.

0

2372.807 - 2377.035 Rory

Yeah, but like, what if I find her Instagram page and she a thot? You should have been a fucking father.

0

Chapter 7: What are the implications of social media on family relationships?

2377.436 - 2378.8 Unknown

I didn't know about this girl.

0

2378.82 - 2384.475 Rory

Like it's her mother. This is the result. Her mother kept her secret. I did not know. That's not on me.

0

2384.495 - 2385.096 Unknown

Okay.

0

Chapter 8: How do personal experiences shape perceptions of celebrity culture?

2385.116 - 2390.988 Unknown

It's not on you. But if she's a thought, then you can understand why. And you can still get to... That's crazy.

0

2391.048 - 2394.513 Rory

Yeah. She's been trying to replace you in all the men. So still it falls on me.

0

2394.773 - 2404.308 Unknown

No, it's not that it falls on you, but you can just understand. You're like, what if she had thought, okay, well, you can understand why she is. But also, why does that matter? She's still a human being who's your child.

0

2404.429 - 2417.747 Rory

Yeah, but I don't know. If I meet my 25-year-old daughter for the first time and... And we developed a relationship. Like, yeah, no, I seen your page, your podcast. Like, follow me. I'm like, okay. Follow her on Instagram or whatever. And she got like an OnlyFans on her link.

0

2417.827 - 2420.095 Unknown

Okay, well, you shouldn't be following her then.

2420.243 - 2437.174 Rory

I'm just saying, I just followed her IG. I see the link tree. So you have to go to the OnlyFans. I'm like, my daughter might, she might be putting an album out. Let me click the link tree. You were looking for her Amazon list. No, if it's a link tree in the bio, okay, let me see what my daughter got going on. If I see the OnlyFans symbol, I don't know if I'm speaking to her anymore.

2437.454 - 2438.176 Rory

Let me just be honest.

2439.558 - 2454.592 Damaris

Okay, what if your son is flooding the neighborhood with fentanyl? That's cool. Who's the supplier? We could play catch. I might know somebody with their numbers up. You could take her to get morning tea because you missed all her tea parties. Like that could be a cool. Yeah, I think that'd be dope.

2454.612 - 2467.552 Rory

Go get tea every morning? She might be cool. I would hope she's cool. Yes, I hope so. I'm saying in an event that she's not and she's a thotty and she's out here reckless and it's like, then how do I navigate through that relationship?

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