We begin the season by delving into Sophie Hartman’s 2016 memoir about her time in Zambia, Crowns of Beauty, where we learn about how a young woman from Michigan came to be the adopted mother of two Zambian girls by the age of 25. We learn about Sophie’s deep roots in evangelical Christianity and her state of mind prior to and during the adoptions of M and C; examining the way she portrays herself as both a martyr and savior. We’re also joined by Chad Goller-Sojourner, a performance artist and transracial adoption coach, to help listeners understand the complexities of transracial adoptions. *** Links and Resources: Chad Goller-Sojourner’s Sitting in Circles with Rich White Girls: Memoir of a Bulimic Black Boy will be adding show dates in spring 2025. Click HERE for more information. More information on Chad’s background with transracial adoption: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1q76t_IpbJil2vWQVsNnw7f8Ms8p_lstK/view Preorder Andrea and Mike’s new book The Mother Next Door: Medicine, Deception, and Munchausen by Proxy Catch Andrea and Mike at their Seattle Book Launch Event: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/andrea-dunlop-and-mike-weber-the-mother-next-door-tickets-1097661478029 Learn more about our featured non-profit and mutual aid organizations: https://www.nobodyshouldbelieveme.com/nsbm-supports/ Check out You Probably Think This Story's About You: https://brittaniard.com/podcast Click here to view our sponsors. Remember that using our codes helps advertisers know you’re listening and helps us keep making the show! Subscribe on YouTube where we have full episodes and lots of bonus content. Follow Andrea on Instagram for behind-the-scenes photos: @andreadunlop Buy Andrea's books here. To support the show, go to Patreon.com/NobodyShouldBelieveMe or subscribe on Apple Podcasts where you can get all episodes early and ad-free and access exclusive ethical true crime bonus content. For more information and resources on Munchausen by Proxy, please visit MunchausenSupport.com The American Professional Society on the Abuse of Children’s MBP Practice Guidelines can be downloaded here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 2: What challenges did Sophie face during the adoption process?
You will find that I have loved you, Lord. I have loved you hard and with abandon. My eyes are on you, locked in. I'm gazing. You will find me fully and wholly in love with you. I will drink this cup, this double agony, this double grief, this searing pain, this deep anger and this hatred of injustice because of them. And I will love you wholly as I drink this cup, sowing in tears.
Sowing in tears. Sowing in tears.
In her memoir, and when she speaks to the media about her daughters, Sophie refers to the two young girls she brought home from Zambia as orphans. And there's an important cultural nuance here. In the United States, when we say orphan, we usually take this to mean a child whose parents are dead.
However, because of the differences in family structure, the word orphan has a pretty different context in Zambia, according to Zambian journalist, Glory Mishingi. Children become orphaned when they lose their parents, but parents are not seen as the only primary caregivers in a Zambian family. Zambians embrace the extended family system.
So the adults that we would refer to as aunts and uncles are also considered parental figures and often referred to as mom and dad as well, especially in traditional village settings. Similarly, cousins are referred to as sisters and brothers, etc. So when someone loses their parents and can't live on their own, the other adults in the family automatically take over custody of that, quote, orphan.
In a few circumstances where families are too poor or too abusive, the orphans will be taken to an orphanage, where they will remain until they are able to be reunited with family or in cases where that's not possible, come of age and go out on their own. So while in the U.S.
we may think of an orphanage as a place where abandoned children await adoption, orphanages in Zambia can serve as more of what we think of as a foster home for children. Because of the vagueness and frankly the strangeness of Sophie's writing, it's hard to get a grasp on what she was doing day-to-day in Zambia prior to meeting and adopting her older daughter Em.
Largely, it seems that she was in the business of saving souls. There's a lot of talk about saving women and children and being a quote, mother to them. But the particulars aren't clear other than various mentions of proselytizing and Bible study and occasional mentions of meetings with various healthcare providers. And Sophie doesn't appear to have any specialized training.
However, as well demonstrated by the book, she sure does seem to know a lot of scripture. There's a lot about Jesus in this book. I would say at least a third of the text is Sophie in rapturous conversation with him. Now, as for any of the earthly men she encounters in her time in Zambia, Sophie has nothing good to report.
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Chapter 5: What are the complexities of transracial adoption?
True Story Media. Before we begin, a quick warning that in this show, we discuss child abuse, and this content may be difficult for some listeners. If you or anyone you know is a victim or survivor of medical child abuse, please go to munchausensupport.com to connect with professionals who can help.
There is a family in Renton that I want to introduce you to. Mom, Sophie, went on an inspiring trip to Zambia in her college year. She's since adopted two girls. One of them has an incredibly rare disorder. Doctors say it's a one in a million chance.
The audio you just heard is from a news story that aired on King 5 television back in May of 2019. This story wasn't on my radar, but I had a lot going on back then. I had just had a baby and had a new book coming out. And this was around the time that Munchausen by Proxy was really entering my work life.
The month that this story aired, I'd done my very first interview about my own family story for Vanity Fair. And this was followed by an appearance on a local station about my third novel, We Came Here to Forget. This was all taking place amid the second investigation into my sister for Munchausen by proxy abuse of her children.
By the middle of that summer, the courts would return my sister's children to her. And a few months after that, the prosecuting attorney would make the decision not to file charges against my sister, Megan Carter, despite the horrifying and voluminous evidence against her. But back to Sophie. In general, seeing stories about sick kids in the news is upsetting for a bunch of reasons.
So family friends are banding together. They're trying to raise money. And this is something that is, you know, no little ask. We're talking about like $60,000 for a vehicle for them. So we just wanted to put their positive energy out there.
Of course, there are the particular fears and questions that I bring to it, given my experience with my sister. Is this mom telling the truth? What if this child isn't a victim of a rare disease, but a victim of the person purporting to care for them?
Even when there are no red flags for abuse, which is mostly the case, these stories are pretty dystopian because they illuminate a tragic failing of our country's healthcare system.
The horrible reality that families, many of whom I'm sure would prefer to keep their children's health private, are forced into a situation where they have to perform their trauma publicly in the hopes that kind strangers might step in to relieve the skyrocketing medical bills that could otherwise bankrupt their family.
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