Off Air with Jane & Fi
Episodes
Feeling limitless just north of Hatfield
08 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi’s career delusions continue today as they ponder why they’ve never been offered a professional cricket commentary career. They also ch...
Snogging the Yale lock? (with Jake Humphrey)
07 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Wednesday! Hope you're keeping warm and managing to stay upright. Besides sport, politics, corruption, and shortbread, Jane and Fi discuss using...
Girlguiding and PVC jumpsuits (with Maggie O'Farrell)
06 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Fi’s blood pressure has well and truly spiked today, so join us as we collectively try to bring it back down… Coming off the lid today, there’s ...
Never as far as Reading without a bumper pack of Imodium
05 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
It’s 2026, and Jane and Fi are back - reunited and ready to run their mouths. In this episode, they demonstrate their budding potential as high-leve...
OFF AIR…EXTRA (with Ancestry)
02 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
In this special bonus episode brought to you by Ancestry, Fi chats to The Times and Sunday Times editor Andy Silvester, and Ancestry family histo...
BEST OF 2025: Interviews - Part Two
01 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
It’s officially 2026! Happy New Year - we hope your head is OK… In this bonus episode, we revisit Jane and Fi’s conversations with Joanna Lumley...
LIVE AT CHELTENHAM LITERATURE FESTIVAL (with Penny Lancaster)
25 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Merry Christmas! You may be hiding in the pantry right now - we’re right there with you! In this bonus podcast episode, Jane and Fi are live on stag...
BEST OF 2025: Interviews - Part One
22 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Monday! Just three more sleeps until Christmas - we hope this will help you drift off soundly, or simply provide you with an excuse to step out ...
Hot under the collar over some ribbed cranberry sauce (with Chris McCausland)
18 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s the final official podcast episode of the year! Merry Christmas from all the Off Air team. Pour yourself a glass of fizz and settle in as Fi ch...
Exfoliating with a Follett face towel (with Andrew Billen)
17 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
’Twas the penultimate Off Air episode of the year, and all through the studio… it was anything but quiet. Fi chats yacht showrooms, Christmas haik...
A bustling lesbian bonobo community (with Susie Wolff)
16 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Fi’s still manning the podcast solo, with a bit of help from Eve and your wonderful emails along the way. There’s chat of double reeds, doing the ...
OFF AIR…EXTRA (with Emma Bridgewater and Thomas Fudge's biscuits)
12 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this special bonus episode brought to you by Thomas Fudge's biscuits, Fi chats to Britain's most celebrated ceramicist, Emma Bridgewater.They talk ...
The potential to be problematic (with Paul Feig)
11 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Today is a new day and the playlist is closed! Fi finally delivers her heavily-trailed lodger email, and there are accents… proceed with caution. Th...
Relieving yourself in the Christmas lunch canteen queue (with Spencer Matthews)
10 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The playlist is open and the cupboard door is closed and locked! Take a deep breath... In this episode, Fi is underwhelmed by a French B&B, she’...
Fi's secret sleeve tattoo... (with Sebastian Faulks)
09 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
There are lots of questions left unanswered in today's pod. Fi is steering the ship solo - exploring whether TV characters should say goodbye? What th...
Barely presentable and just about hanging together (with Susie Dent)
04 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
A final thank you to everyone for thanking us for thanking you… get it? Fi dives into open-water faux pas, Spotify Wrapped, early-years parenting, a...
Slightly slutty open curtains?
03 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s just Fi and her one remaining Greggs share today, with a member of production on standby to act as a bit of a sounding board. Fi covers aquafab...
Put down the nugget and listen! (with Chris Van Tulleken)
02 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's just Fi today as Jane remains in the North. Fi peels back the first door of our 'Jane and Fi Advent Calendar' and shares her favourite primary sc...
Book Club - Just Kids
28 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We've made it to our tenth book club edition! This one is what we call a mixed bag, so pop the prosecco and sit back... Jane and Fi discuss 'Just Kids...
Was marshmallow brought over on the Mayflower? (with Sally Wainwright)
27 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Gobble Gobble! Happy Thanksgiving... Jane and Fi try to clear up why Thanksgiving falls on the fourth Thursday of November - and fail miserably. They ...
You say it best when your calligraphy says 'F Off!'
26 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We bring you an email-only episode to mark today's fiscal event… Jane and Fi chat supermarket encounters, road rage, and poonamis - plus there's mor...
The Most Excellent Order of Jane and Fi
25 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane has been telling porky pies (ahem) and she’s been caught out again… Jane and Fi also cover their love of Ikea, investment, driverless cars, a...
Getting quite arsey in a Skoda Monte Carlo
24 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Please have your driving gloves at the ready - there’s plenty of car chat in today’s episode. Jane and Fi also chat replenishing the store cupboar...
Thinking bidet positive (with Tom Allen)
20 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Thursday! Feel free to suck the goodness out of this episode and spit the rest into a napkin. Jane Pongo Garvey and Fi chat manned petrol pumps,...
AI man flaps?
19 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We're in a healing mode so vasectomy chat is on pause... Instead, Jane and Fi chat driverless cars, which language you think in, and bold-faced lies.....
The joys of Tom Schafernaker's mankle
18 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why do black and white photos look so good? Who's carrying around turkey in their dressing gowns? What is it with celebrities in Suffolk? All question...
Only the finest silverware for my Monster Munch
17 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane has been released from the safe house, and she and Fi are back in the same room! They discuss cycling after the snip, their least favourite washi...
Cruising down the M5 with a parrot and the X-Factor (with Petula Clark)
13 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Public service announcement: Guinea pigs breed faster than you can say 'Pets At Home'. For more top tips, keep listening... Jane and Fi chat urinating...
A hairbrush lies tantalising out of reach
12 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to this podcast about a podcast that nobody is sure has been a podcast... Jane (in the North) and Fi (in the South) discuss Follett Land, blok...
Just one more decade out in the wild (with Louise Penny)
11 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane joins us from sheltered housing and finds herself tempted by the slow life... Fi brings her back down to earth with topics like poaching or brais...
OFF AIR…EXTRA (with Scarlette Douglas and Smart Energy GB)
07 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this special bonus episode brought to you by Smart Energy GB, Jane and Fi sit down with TV presenter and property expert Scarlette Douglas.Sca...
Can you hear the coyote repellent siren, Fernando? (with Lady Glenconner)
06 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Thursday! Jane and Fi muse over the duality of the cake slicer, imagine a youthful Jane clasping her briefcase and a Flemish train map, and cons...
Mary, mother of a Fiat Panda
05 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
From stock market advice to travel tips - we really do it all on this podcast. Jane and Fi chat good morning Cava, Emmerdale Farm, and Boris Johnson d...
Down to a fiver for the apocalypse! (with David Olusoga)
04 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Whether you're storming down the road like Fi or falling off the kerb like Jane, we hope you'll be safely seated for this episode. Jane and Fi chat ab...
Popping your hedonism in the bedside table
03 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Monday - Jane Garvey is back! She and Fi are happily reunited to discuss naming household items, the danger of the sausage roll, searching for t...
OFF AIR…EXTRA (with Lisa Snowdon and TENA)
31 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this special bonus episode brought to you by TENA, Jane and Fi sit down with model, author and women’s health advocate Lisa Snowdon.As part of Me...
Hoovering in pants and letting rip (with Richard Coles)
30 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's not Wednesday and we're not livid - hope you're not either. Jamal and Fi chat the contents of your notes, booking an Airbnb for nookie, and book ...
Joy, the corkscrew (with Jung Chang)
29 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The glass has very much been smashed on emergency Jane and she's settled in for the week. Jamal and Fi chat playing shops, influencer culture and L.A....
Don't even think about the Boxing Day trifle if you're not an EYNGP (with Paterson Joseph)
28 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Day 2, let's go! Jane G is still off so Jane M continues to keep her seat warm and get's booked on the spot for the rest of the week. That's show bizz...
A vintage year for fish fingers
27 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We said last week that normal scheduling would resume on Monday. Well, we lied... Jane has been called away for the week, so it’s Jane Mulkerrins to...
Hell hath no fury like a cardinal who's lost his Marvel (with Peter James)
23 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Fi is still in quarantine and joins us down a slightly bumpy line. Normal scheduling is due to resume Monday but, in the meantime, Jane and Fi chat th...
Two tiny halves of a big-gobbed broadcasting hole
22 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Fi is still easing herself back onto solid foods, so she joins from home. She and Jane are preparing to shortly pop off to an awards luncheon — they...
We're all as gently batty as each other (with Amy Wallace)
21 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Fi is sadly still off, so Jane is holding down the fort. There’s more Cheltenham chat, musings on omelette stations, reflections on sumo wrestlers, ...
A surprisingly fruity bunch
20 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Monday! Fi's off sick, so Robbie Millen, literary editor of The Times and The Sunday Times, is keeping her seat warm - and he attempts a little ...
OFF AIR... EXTRA
17 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to another Friday special! This week's bonus episode features an interview with one of our lovely listeners. Lesley Allen is a ghostwrite...
Your one way ticket to middle aged Glastonbury...
16 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi are bringing you all the magic of middle England in the Autumn, offering a behind the scenes glimpse at The Times and Sunday Times Chelten...
The sound of sumo flesh on flesh echoing through London (with Philippa Gregory)
15 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi consider the demands they’ll make in the near future... as 80-year-old megastars. They also discuss Big Ben’s government name, Tudor i...
Tinkle those ivories like there's no tomorrow (with Alice Roberts)
14 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
There's yet another reference to an appendage today – we can only apologise; our minds are in the gutter! After that, Jane and Fi consider whether t...
Drawing the line at penises
13 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane has an apology in today's episode... again. Once that's out the way, Jane and Fi discuss being two halves of a pantomime horse, Scottish pronunci...
Sonnets from the (Water)loo line (with Ann Cleeves)
09 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi have been at a very important breakfast meeting, and they're feeling carb-giddy. In this sophisticated episode, they muse over the art of ...
Sharing underwear is for blood relatives only (with Joanna Lumley)
08 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s Wednesday! Tomorrow is Thursday, and then - guess what - Friday! Nearly there… Jane and Fi chat the Frankfurt kitchen, knocking on wood, care...
Penning a Neolithic post-orgy thank you letter (with Elizabeth Day)
07 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you notice a difference in today’s podcast? Is there a whiff of professionalism about it? No? Never mind then... Jane and Fi are undeterred by ma...
Firmly clasping a jodhpur-clad buttock...
06 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to this elevated, culturally charged, aggressively sophisticated podcast. Jane and Fi tackle Frankfurt kitchens, Liverpool Echo obituaries, th...
OFF AIR... EXTRA
03 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to another Friday special! This week's bonus episode features an interview with co-host of the TLS podcast Alex Clark. Alex is a literar...
Very macho for a lady-house (with Ken Follett)
02 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy International Ken Follett Day to all those who celebrate! Jane has dusted off her medieval wench dress (and it was under a thick layer of dust),...
Let's not hear it for flannelette nightgowns (with Yanis Varoufakis)
01 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s Wednesday, and Jane and Fi are very, very busy. We understand that you’re also busy, but do try to keep an eye out for Swiss gags, Greek gags...
One man’s breakdown is another man’s breakthrough (with Lyse Doucet)
30 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's a “welcome to autumn” type of day, and the vibes are good! Jane and Fi discuss bike theft, pet obituaries, and the moment you knew it was tim...
I like mine when it goes boi-oi-oi-oing!
29 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Ken Follett week to all those who celebrate! Jane and Fi cover Swiss humour, Kamala's narrator skills, lady moon landings, and the male form. ...
OFF AIR... EXTRA
26 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to another Friday special! This week's bonus episode features an interview with Nicholas Pearson, editor and friend to Hilary Mantel.It's...
The Twilight Years (with Tim Spector)
25 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Down your tools and give this podcast your FULL ATTENTION! Jane and Fi chat real tennis, Bruce Forsyth's ghost, house husbands, and gravestones for pe...
Mile-high moussaka
24 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi are back together, but they've returned to some confusion about who’s who… Once they helpfully clear that up, they ponder minced-sheep...
OFF AIR...EXTRA (with Cancer Research UK)
19 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this special bonus episode brought to you by Cancer Research UK, Jane and Fi speak to Clara, who was diagnosed with blood cancer as a child. Clara ...
Moving on from your beef-cheese (with Nigella Lawson)
18 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Thursday from the past... Jamal and Fi travel through time to bring you their musings on vacuum packed sausages, beef-cheese and Be-Ro flapjacks...
A pant of safety (with Tiggy Walker)
17 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
BIG NEWS. Trump has landed and Jamal and Fi are getting a bit sidetracked... They also chat Bananarama, period pants, and over-sized bath robes. Pl...
Thinking about the Roman Empire every three minutes (with Ian McEwan)
16 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Calling all Davids! This one’s for you. Jane M and Fi dive into everything from beard-growing and cycling to hormones and being triggered in East Lo...
Exotic and Mundane (with Lady Hale)
15 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane M keeps Jane Garvey's seat warm this week, but she only just made it in by the skin of her teeth. Fi also had a slightly treacherous journey in. ...
On winking terms with the butcher (with Clare Balding)
11 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Stories of jugged hare, absolute monarchs and applicator tampons have carried Jane and Fi to the end of another week at Times Towers.And they are join...
The great cattery in the sky (with Rick Astley)
10 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi recount their visit to Downing Street last night and it sounds like the Champagne was well and truly flowing. Larry the cat was did not ma...
Chunky and perfectly formed, like me (with Miriam Margolyes)
09 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The Mayoress of Liverpool (aka Jane) has denounced Fi for her attempt at a northern accent, and has further decreed that the next Deputy Leader of the...
Never confuse a gorge with a hole!
08 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Should the teacher related to Cheddar Man become the King? Why did the Queen ride side saddle? And what wisdom will Jane and Fi dish out during their ...
The Whirligig We Carry (with Henry Marsh)
04 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s Double Tash Thursday! Welcome! Jane picks her pope of the week (no prizes for guessing who), they also cover UFO sightings, riding side saddle,...
Please God, don't act it out (with Nick Clegg)
03 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Please bear with Jane - she's feeling rather 'liverish' after a raucous Tuesday night. There's more discussion of hot tuna, parking scams, and the tru...
Boosting bosoms from the comfort of your armchair
02 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The sheltered housing for the more commercially viable is under construction, and we expect it to open its doors to Jane and Fi soon… While they wai...
Ladies of the night...
01 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Pinch, punch, first day of the month! Jane and Fi muse over significant events associated with the 1st of September. They also discuss Julia Roberts’...
Top of the Popes (with James Fox)
28 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Is anyone thinking about Johnny's sister? And what about Johnny's sister's husband?! Well, we are! Jane and Fi also think about dog DNA, cockneys, and...
See You Next Thursday! (with Ray Mears)
27 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If you've seen an appallingly large sea monster with frightening eyes and a seaweed-like mane, and it's not your husband - please get in touch! Jane a...
Headfirst into a bowl of unnecessary royal pasta
26 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Tuesday! Fi’s over summer, but it’s still hanging in there - a bit like us… Jane and Fi also get into bilingual pets, Guildford, and a che...
OFF AIR... EXTRA
22 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to another Friday special! This week's bonus episode features an interview with Rachel de Souza, the Children's Commissioner for England,...
You'll remember my flatulence with fondness
21 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Thursday! Jane is kicking off about what she deems to be an inappropriate funeral song, whilst Fi expresses her biggest fear: eating jellyfish c...
I could drive you places, you could drive me mad!
20 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In today's episode it emerges that Fi forgot to compliment Jane on her flecks of grey, so now the whole 'au naturale' plan has gone out the window... ...
On the cusp of a grain of truth...
19 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Fi returns from her holiday of doom and reunites with Jane, or should we say Mystic Garv. They discuss previously predicted big cat sightings whi...
Squirrels aren't known for their road sense!
18 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Come in Brighton? This is Garvey calling. It's Mulkerrins' last day on the pod before Fi returns tomorrow and the two Janes discuss Pride and Prejudic...
Assuming the middle-aged woman’s pose, clutching a litre of milk and a bag of rocket (with Val McDermid)
14 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Taylor Swift, if you’re reading this (and you probably are), watch out - Jane is coming for your man! Jane and Jamal also discuss A-Level results, a...
Living for an airport frisk (with Nicola Sturgeon)
13 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jamal isn't interested in Jane’s cacao nibs - sparking wistful thoughts of Fi’s return (although there's no guarantee Fi would care either...) Jam...
Fridge full of p*cky b*ts (with Celia Imrie)
12 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s Tuesday - we’re two days out from Fruity Thursdays. Buckle in… Jamal and Jane chat the Worcestershire wildcat, nature documentaries, career...
I actually enjoyed that more than I thought I would...
11 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Thank you to everyone who came to see us in North Berwick — especially those who attended reluctantly and ended up enjoying it more than they expect...
OFF AIR... EXTRA
08 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to another Friday special! This week's bonus episode is all about HRT. It features an interview with endocrinologist Professor Annice Muk...
Book Club - Leonard and Hungry Paul
07 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi are back with their ninth book club pick - and this one was our most unanimous yet! 'Leonard and Hungry Paul' is by Rónán Hession. Róná...
A partridge in a placenta pear tree (with Adrian Dunbar)
06 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The balance between cock-ups and funny bits is a delicate one - we hope we've got it right... In this episode, Jane and Fi chat Mariah Carey's denial ...
Releasing your southern-ness at Peterborough
05 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The animals may have gone onto the ark two by two, but Jane Garvey will be boarding solo! More on that... plus cruise ship balconies, the many ailment...
Is there a sex kitten in your cul-de-sac?
04 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Happy Monday! It's another week and Jane and Fi are here to tackle the big questions... Are frozen shoulders contagious? Is there a sex kitten in your...
I'm the Shirley Temple of radio! (with Daisy Goodwin)
31 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi grapple with the big questions on this rainy Thursday. How do you make the sound of snogging? What kind of audio book would Fi read? Shoul...
Take me back to the path of righteousness PLEASE (with Gary Numan)
30 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's day three of our Lionesses Euros Hangover™ and Jane is wondering whether Cliff Richard should have joined the celebrations. Fi's got some thoug...
Nothing sexy about helping Santa (with Caspar Lee)
29 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In today’s episode, Jane and Fi mull over Mariah Carey's eccentricities, whether Michael Binyon would do us a favour with a new jingle and the state...
Mystic Garv is officially UNRELIABLE!
28 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s a new week at Times Towers. In today’s episode, Jane reflects on giving grow-your-own mushrooms to former partners, while Fi shares creative ...
I want to be Lonnie when I grow up! (in paid partnership with Washington D.C, featuring Lonnie G. Bunch III)
25 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this special bonus episode brought to you by Washington, DC, Jane and Fi learn about the many experiences waiting in the U.S. capital. They chat wi...
Scrunch, fold or flatten? (with Janet Street-Porter)
24 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
There’s no judgement to be had on a deserted beach, but there’s plenty to be had on this podcast… Jane and Fi chat about topless men, 'Fifty Sha...
Greatest Tits Radio (with Max Hastings)
23 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Off the back of that dramatic Lionesses game, Jane and Fi muse over why they never went pro... They also consider scary airplane toilet noises, midges...
Late-in-life moustache experimentation
22 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This podcast episode boasts bespoke emails, quality insights (sometimes), high-spec royal musings, excellent conversation links, and editing to a very...
Getting a smear test in a Toyota Yaris?
21 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Jane and Fi are back together after two weeks apart and there's much to discuss! They cover bullsh*t merchants, Coldplay concerts, and toilet paper. ...