Off Air with Jane & Fi

Does S&M include much chilli sauce? (with Sarah Beeny)

31 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane G has been trying out a hot wings challenge, while Jane M was trying to escape Three Bridges Station.They're joined by property TV presenter Sara...

Will I be additionally bonkers tonight? (with Maggie Alphonsi)

30 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Jane are talking caravan holidays, howling at the moon and actively helping the environment by eating chips.They're joined by Maggie Alphonsi...

Drinking neat Campari at midday

29 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In the absence of 'wee Fi', Jane G is joined by Jane M, and will only be reading emails from people named Jane this week (just kidding).They discuss h...

Am I allowed to speak now? (with Sheela Banerjee)

17 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are reuniting decorative milk bottles with their international owners.They're also talking step-parents, sombreros and spellings.Sheela Ba...

No bobble was strong enough to contain the Garvey locks!

16 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are gearing up to turn their 'out of office' on but they've still got a show to do! They reveal who will be replacing them in their r...

That's another nut going down (with Deborah Meaden)

15 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are recovering from an almost on-air crisis that nearly happened but didn't. They're joined by Deborah Meaden, to talk about her new book ...

I long to squeeze one of those tomatoes (with Fats Timbo)

14 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi is doing her best to cheer Jane up after a 're-shuffle' at her other job. They chat TV recommendations, hopeless babies and weeing on the collar of...

Fingers in the cream (with Sharron Davies)

10 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's a sporty special today: Jane laments her full time job getting in the way of her golf progress, Fi has an apology to make about netball and they'...

Wimpy and the queen's funeral

09 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi have been in touch with the creator of the taxidermy sensation: Stoned Fox. They also ask the big questions: are man buns sexy? And what h...

You know me, I like a chunk (with Laura Whitmore)

08 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi talk family bathroom politics and delve into more taxidermy horrors. They also compare two on screen sensations: Barbie, and Greg Wallace'...

See attached half giraffe

07 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi discuss whether taxidermy can grow on you, or if it belongs in the family freezer. It's also the end of the penny farthing (for now...)The...

Spiritual blockages

03 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi discuss whether they would stuff their cats, and reflect on some sad aquariums and zoos. They also reveal the next book for their book clu...

Two fillings and a smear test

02 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi reflect on owning your success, trapped wind from both ends, and delve into more family holiday horrors. They're also joined by music jour...

My long suffering pac-a-mac

01 Aug 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi chat about the highs and lows of family holidays, their desire for a hand cream amnesty, and terrible raffle prizes. They're also joined b...

It's been ages since I measured mine (with Anna Richardson)

31 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi chat about a certain person's miracle meat, the ongoing issue of Jane's trapped wind, and family holiday politics. They're also joined by ...

Book Club - Fresh Water for Flowers

28 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The first book club has finally wrapped and Jane and Fi can't quite come to an agreement... Join them as they respond to your emails, Instagram messag...

Capers in the basement

27 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi discuss the contents of Jane's basement and try to work out why Rear Admirals are called Rear Admirals. Answers on a postcard please. They...

A couple of large fries stuck in your cleavage (with Carol Kirkwood)

26 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane's got trapped wind and Fi's rather upset about it, Fi checked her carbon footprint and the results are revealed AND more animal PR... Plus, ever...

Ladies' fluff (with Eddi Reader)

25 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are pondering why beavers have such good PR, whether they would consent to being micro-chipped and if Jane should put the heating on. They...

To lick or not to lick?

24 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi reflect on the highs (and licks) of Latitude Festival, and England's somewhat lack-lustre win over Haiti. And they are STILL talking Penn...

Live from Latitude Festival (with Richard Curtis and Emma Freud)

20 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are live at Latitude and they talk air-con and licking Mary Berry. Richard Curtis and Emma Freud join to talk about their Suffolk the...

He had three nipples and a lisp (with Lisa Jewell)

19 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi discuss great-great uncles, ongoing extreme heat and Jane reminds us how busy she is, actually.Plus, author Lisa Jewell joins Jane and Fi ...

Tapestry on the Northern line (with Katriona O'Sullivan)

18 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi chat about University Challenge and the prospect of sharing a bed.  Katriona O'Sullivan joins to speak about her memoir Poor, an...

Nothing against Harrogate

17 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi is back at Jane's side after a week away. They talk about her trip to the Cotswolds, Michael Ball (again), and recalling a Yorkshire visit where th...

Penny-farthing watch (with Diana Bird)

13 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It’s the final episode with Jane squared and they chat about the play Aspects of Love and bourbon balls. RAF Squadron Leader Diana Bird joins t...

Back-to-back Ball (with David Tennant)

12 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's another instalment of Jane and Jane. They're chatting trips to Las Vegas, more Penny-farthing sightings, and seeing Michael Ball in the West End....

Swifties unite! (with Katherine Faulkner)

11 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Jane discuss Taylor Swift ticket jeopardy, surprise Sunday morning visits from Showaddywaddy and Penny-farthing related journey delays.Sunday...

A three day streak (with James May)

10 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi is off on her holidays, so it's a dose of double Jane - with Jane Mulkerrins in the hot seat all this week. They chat about getting your steps in, ...

The pinnacle of their podcasting career (with Caitlin Moran)

06 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's the last podcast before Fi goes on holiday, and she's 'slipped slapped up' a bit in a hot pink jacket (as a tribute to the forthcoming Barbie mov...

Don’t do a Madonna (with Kate Mosse)

05 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Today Jane agonises over her trainer socks, Fi is worried about appearing on The Weakest Link and they discover that the herb dill hangs about all day...

On the front line of bants (with Ruth Jones)

04 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi chat throughFi is a vision in burnt orange and Jane doesn’t have drool on her but you wouldn’t know that as they aren’t in front of ...

The fun bus of feminism (with Wes Streeting)

03 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are reunited after a week apart, and to celebrate, the podcast is being filmed. They're discussing Jane's decolletage, if anyone has ever ...

Pelvic floor exercises on the radio (with Rob Rinder)

29 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi and Louise (The Minch) Minchin are back with a final episode of Off Air together before Jane returns next week.They cover when you should do your p...

Tech is my rage place (with Daisy Goodwin)

28 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi and Louise are being very brave using a new studio... next door to their usual one.They cover awkward interviews, why it matters what side of the s...

Profane and profound (with Wendy Mitchell)

27 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi and Louise have shaken up the routine and recorded this episode of Off Air before they've done the live show (no one tell Jane we let them do that,...

The Pavlov's dog of Times Radio (with Louise Minchin)

26 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Louise Minchin joins Fi for today's episode of Off Air, while Jane is off enjoying her holiday (in her own words, 'splurging on Elton!').They cover re...

Every picnic needs a tart (with Karin Slaughter)

22 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi have decided they bring out the worst in each other, but they're here nonetheless to talk about horror films, more erotic novels, and fail...

Comparing your manhood to a chipolata (with Peter Andre)

21 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are having 'all the fun of the fair' at work today as they talk about what women want on television, what to call an erotic novel, and how...

Does nobody speak their mind in the South of England?

20 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi glide through today's episode, touching on all the important bits - from the decline of local newspapers to the waning tradition of thank ...

Why do we keep 'putting off' talking about the care system? [With Emily Kenway]

19 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi roll through a host of different topics on today's episode - from holiday luggage to men's underwear, Fi's love of Coldplay and Britain's ...

A urine-soaked bus-stop and a Londis (with Richard Coles)

15 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are about to head off to their belated Christmas dinner... in the middle of June.But they're here with another bumper episode of former Pr...

She's got her iced buns out (with Sally Gunnell)

14 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are very excited about their recent desk move - but they've just about got time to speak about general elections, Miriam Margolyes in a gl...

I'm actually quite cynical about everybody (with Bob Harris)

13 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The heat just keeps getting to Jane as she becomes borderline delirious in this episode. They also chat Jane's intentions to get in the House of Lords...

Can you hear the sounds of Elephant and Castle?

12 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The heat has got Jane and Fi in a bit of a tizzy! They discuss 'self appointed characters', hating Coldplay and Fi provides another uncomfortable beep...

Not many people have actually walked into an oven… (with Judy Murray)

08 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are talking about Jane’s gift of the second sight, getting angry about idioms, and asking why we can hear the British couple shouting at...

It is odd that he didn't have any genitalia (with Sathnam Sanghera)

07 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi talk cat wounds, mint chocolate buttons and sliding into DMs...They're joined by journalist and writer Sathnam Sanghera to talk about his ...

The Archers is to you what Succession is to me (with Diana Evans)

06 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi chat male contraception, London's transportation system and syphilis... as you do. They’re joined by novelist Diana Evans to discuss he...

I've got these huge knickers, do you want them? (with Gareth Thomas)

05 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are very excited because they've launched an instagram account! You can get involved by following @JaneandFi. Plus rugby legend Gareth Th...

Am I potty-mouthed?

01 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane is looking for a trucker's tan and a couple of burgers, while Fi is singing a little song about boob separators... They're joined by Ukrainian wr...

Never ending dance floors of heaven (with DJ Fat Tony)

31 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi get stuck into some award winning journalism and discuss the afterlife, being a bridesmaid, and some 'frin-tastic' emails.They're joined b...

I don't believe in jet-lag (with Sir David Omand)

30 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane has just about recovered from jet-lag after her trip to Glasgow a month ago. So much so that she considered a trip to B&Q this bank holiday M...

A vigorous seesaw manoeuvre

29 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are busy sunning themselves this bank holiday Monday but they took the time to record an email special. From Joe and the Juice to over-plu...

The cheese calls to you (with Alvin Hall)

25 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Buckle up for an extra existential episode, because Jane and Fi are asking if life would be easier as a sherbet fountain? Or maybe a two-fingered slot...

Maybe they were just drunk (with Gary Kemp)

24 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Is a tabard a housecoat? Is a housecoat a tabard? And what's a dressing gown? Jane and Fi are asking the big questions in today's podcast. They're jo...

What kind of tog is your summer dressing gown? (With Jo Nesbø)

23 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi grapple with the difference between a house coat and a dressing gown and Jane shares the savage lessons she learnt from the time she strok...

Another day, another buttock (with Stephen Mangan)

22 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi have swapped chairs for today's episode and it's causing chaos. They attempt some serious questions about flatulence when they're joined b...

A calming, cold flannel of a person

18 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are talking about pet insurance that's a trifle suspicious, the little moments of joy in raising toddlers and, of course, sex. They're joi...

Head first into an absolutely delicious meal...

17 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi's shower is juddering and Jane reckons we should get the plumbers in to have a look...Plus, Claire Powell finally joins them ‘Off Air’ to discu...

Let loose on Noddy (with Jacqueline Wilson)

16 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Once Fi's finished eating her tuna sandwich, she and Jane get to work planning their twin room in the News UK Retirement Home for the Complex and Dema...

I've blinked twice...let me out! (with Annie Mac)

15 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, Jane & Fi take you through the mechanics of shopping in John Lewis, the tricky dynamics of sex in a long-term relationships, and ...

An orgy in suburbia

11 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Following an afternoon of slightly challenging radio performance, Jane and Fi bring you an all email special. There's plenty to discuss - like what ex...

These enormous knickers are on and they stay on (with Joanne Harris)

10 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Another joyous episode and this time Jane and Fi are talking the joys of naked swimming, elasticated clothing and the controversial twirl.Plus, they'r...

Helping Grandma into her girdle

09 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi plan their re-enactment of the coronation and make their apologies to Jane's late cat Mittens, who is definitely an 'Off Air' fan. They're...

Covered in Coronation glitter and glitz (with Emma Bridgewater and the American Viscountess)

05 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

One more sleep until Coronation day, and Jane and Fi are struggling to contain their excitement. So, they're bringing you an extra special coronation ...

Someone alert Westminster council that the clock face is broken!

04 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It’s the final episode before the Coronation on Saturday and hopefully you’re not sick of it yet because Jane and Fi come to you live from a balco...

Strangled by our robot carers (with Julie McDowall)

03 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane explained why she won't be throwing a Eurovision party, they talk anxiety inducing meetings and softy civil servants.Plus, they’re finally, fin...

All the ingredients for a Christmas hit (with Philippa Gregory)

02 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

What’s putting a pep in Fi’s step? Why isn’t Jane a bestselling author? Have you ever swum naked and not smiled? Plus, Jane and Fi come up with ...

Beat me on the bottom with a Woman's Weekly (with Alex Jones)

01 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are full of coronation chicken sandwiches and ready to talk about everything from nuclear war to safe sex. They're joined by The One Show ...

Oh I'm not discreet at all

27 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane continues to fear for the end of world but its not over yet.... we've got a podcast episode to do! Jane and Fi run you through some top radio jar...

A sip of Kylie's Cava and a gulp of Beefy Botham’s Sauvignon

26 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane’s having tummy troubles but Fi’s by her side offering kind words of support (as always), plus coronation plans commence but Fi has banned Jan...

I don't mean to immediately degrade the podcast (with Matt Baker)

25 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi are battling on despite technical difficulties to talk about longevity, whether you can ever really own a pet and when is the best day for...

It's one of my little icks (with Larry Lamb)

24 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Once the effects of half a paper cup of Kylie Minogue's Prosecco have worn off, Jane and Fi discuss school prizes, knowing your limitations and corona...

Jane to the power of two - with Lorraine Kelly

20 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Jane talk poetry, self esteem, and poor Brian's goolies. They're joined by Lorraine (yes, all the names on this podcast have to rhyme today) ...

I'm full of good bacteria - with Angela Hartnett

19 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane is ready to ramble as she's flying solo today. Michelin star chef Angela Hartnett stops by to talk about the latest series of her podcast 'Dish'....

A moment to think about little Brian's balls - with Curtis Sittenfeld

18 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi discuss small talk at parties and school dinners whilst poor Brian awaits collection from the vets having parted with his manhood. Pl...

Actually, just call an ambulance - Professor Tim Spector

17 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane is back, but has she brought Fi any presents from her holiday? Who can help Jane fix her satellite? And can a cool, successful man ever be a keep...

I was a binge smoker... - with Stig Abell

13 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's the last day of Jane’s absence but the wonderful Jane Mulkerrins, associate editor of The Times Magazine, has filled the Jane-shaped hole in ev...

I can't cope with your youthful success - with Cecelia Ahern

12 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Ed Vaizey, who's sitting in for Jane today, is impressed by Fi's youthful success - Fi's trying not to be offended.Ed's also kicking himself that he d...

I've crashed the junction - with Jenny Eclair

11 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane's away and, in her absence, Fi is teaching Ed Vaizey all the radio lingo. What's the difference between a bed and a jingle? What's "crashing the ...

Just another manic Monday

10 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi is still under the weather so joins via zoom, meanwhile, Jane’s away on holiday so Ed Vaizey is sitting in… what could go wrong?Plus Suzanne He...

It's a two-patch kind of day

06 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi is still under the weather so Jane's on her lonesome again this episode, but she's making the most of her "splendid isolation".Pre-ailment, Jane an...

Jane goes it alone - with Christine Flack

05 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi isn't feeling well so Jane's flying solo for this episode. Christine Flack speaks to Jane about her daughter, the TV presenter Caroline Flack, who ...

A handbag full of vomit

04 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

After a long day of arts and crafts in the newsroom, Jane and Fi discuss the pros and cons of a 'pimped up M&S hot cross bun'. They're joined by A...

My inner philatelist is a-flutter - with Elizabeth Day

03 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane's asking what people did in the old days on a Sunday afternoon when all the shops used to be closed, while Fi's mangling adjectives in her sleep....

Countdown to The Coronation

31 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

For this special Friday episode, Jane and Fi are joined by two royal experts to count down to The Coronation of King Charles III.They also discuss whe...

We're a little bit raggedy around the edges

30 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Can the production team fool Jane and Fi with an AI generated email? They're joined by Nigerian writer Ayobami Adebayo about her second novel 'A Spell...

Pithy with a twinkle - with Mel Giedroyc

29 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The pair take a glimpse down memory lane and reminisce over maypole dancing, and look to the future as they decide what they'd spend their lottery win...

De-moulding a jelly rabbit

28 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi's friendship may be over after a terrible Kent-based ant-breeding company name suggestion. They're joined by journalist and food critic Ji...

Daddy pig really is a useless lummox

27 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi's pitching her latest invention to help women to avoid bathroom queues, and Jane wants Russell Crowe to come around and give her an exorcism.They'r...

Où est Greggs? - with Eddie Izzard

23 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi soldier on through a printing nightmare. They cover everything from daytime TV to French oral exams, and still find time to discuss Greg W...

Some very frank details about prostate examinations - with Tony Robinson

22 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane is considering speed-learning the lute, while Fi wonders whether we've lost the art of cooking with a mould.They're joined by actor, writer and p...

We must keep a veneer of showbiz

21 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

There's no time for shilly shallying or dilly dallying on today's episode... Jane is on the run from her dream tortoise and Fi's promised everyone bis...

Haphazard on a conveyor belt

20 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We've got a new theme tune, a new moisturising regime for Jane and a new supermarket checkout career for Fi.They're also joined by Asma Khan, UN World...

Live at WOW Festival

17 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In this bonus episode of Off Air, Jane and Fi are live from WOW - Women of the World Festival at the Royal Festival Hall in London.They're joined onst...

We're here because we're authentic - with Anneka Rice

16 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Fi discusses her former ambitions to be a professional oboe player, and Jane claims Barack Obama is actually a bit of a 'cold fish' in real life.They'...

'Jane, get your dad to call me.'

15 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi make cultural comparison and dissect the perplexing nature of a Boots...Also, they're are joined by Roma Agrawal, the structural engineer ...

Let's park Gary Lineker and talk about toasters - with Spencer Matthews

14 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The dial on the side of the toaster has inspired a critical debate - could this be the most important experiment of our time?Also, Jane and Fi are joi...

Rich people in the public eye - with Dan Snow

13 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi pitch a device to help short people feel more comfortable in the bath.They're also joined by historian Dan Snow, who chats about his lates...

A cosy festival of hunker-downer-dom

09 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Jane and Fi start a fond and long farewell to the podcast music, and Jane gives her latest theatre review. They're also joined by Pulitzer Prize winni...

‘Get Off Air…’ - with Donna Leon

08 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's International Women's Day and Jane and Fi are busy empowering. Plus Jane and Fi consider what to name their dating platform...And crime novelist ...