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Shameless

We've got beef with alter egos

29 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What happened at the inaugural Enhanced Games?

0.031 - 1.012 Zara McDonald

The worst has happened.

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2.515 - 3.096 Michelle Andrews

What's happened?

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3.656 - 10.126 Zara McDonald

Well... Are we on? We're on. This week, as you know, I rely on Siri a little too heavily.

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10.166 - 15.454 Michelle Andrews

Yes, you do. You text... When you say you rely on Siri, you text from Siri 24-7.

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16.055 - 37.407 Zara McDonald

When I'm in my car. Yes. So when I'm in my car, I will put Siri on or like Apple CarPlay or whatever and I'll say, text Zara McDonald. Only this week... For maybe the 10th time in my life, it did not send a text to you and one of our other friends like I intended. It sent a text to you and someone I did not want to communicate with.

37.668 - 60.079 Michelle Andrews

No. Someone I'm not on good terms with. So it is true. It's actually funny. Yesterday, also, let's see how my voice holds up today. Forgive me in advance. Sorry, I'm just really getting comfy in this pregnant minute. Yesterday you were like sitting on the couch at work with me and you were like, just some friendship feedback. And then you proceeded to give me feedback.

60.099 - 72.971 Zara McDonald

And if anyone's curious, my friendship feedback for Zara is she is not forthcoming enough with news and events of her own life. I have to stumble upon interesting happenings in the life of Zara McDonald because she does not nominate them to me.

73.432 - 79.718 Michelle Andrews

Your friendship feedback is genuinely stop using Siri and just use the time to like look out the window.

79.698 - 84.622 Zara McDonald

But I live further away from the office than you do. No, that's true. And Siri is handy.

Chapter 2: What are the controversies surrounding celebrity alter egos?

720.032 - 740.401 Zara McDonald

That's basically like it's not the size of the Shameless Media team, but it's not far off. God, I could have won these swimming races. Genuinely, we should have entered. Just gone as clean. Drugged ourselves to the hilt. So some names included the Australian James Magnusson, Ben Proud, Fred Curley, Cody Miller. Why are you saying any of these names? Belly put them in our notes.

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740.621 - 744.586 Zara McDonald

James Magnusson, I recognise. He was an Olympic swimmer.

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744.946 - 746.448 Michelle Andrews

Oh, yeah. He was one of our best.

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746.508 - 748.09 Zara McDonald

Did he ever win an Olympic medal?

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748.23 - 748.851 Michelle Andrews

Yes, he did.

Chapter 3: How do predictors of divorce relate to personal relationships?

749.391 - 749.512 Zara McDonald

Oh.

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750.092 - 751.053 Michelle Andrews

She says, guessing.

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751.794 - 755.258 Zara McDonald

Oh, yes. He's won a silver and two bronze medals.

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755.39 - 775.441 Michelle Andrews

Yeah, so when it comes to James Magnuson, two years ago, he told the Hello Sports podcast he would 100% participate in the enhanced games only if, and I quote, they come to the party with a million dollars. For the world record. For the freestyle world record. It has to be for that big money, though. Without it, I'm not putting my body through that. I'm semi-serious.

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775.561 - 784.9 Michelle Andrews

I will juice to the gills for the right price. I will juice to the gills for the right price. I mean, there are a few things I'd do for the right price, but juice to the gills, I'm not sure.

784.94 - 788.609 Zara McDonald

And importantly, this is not $1 million Australian, Zara.

788.629 - 794.104 Michelle Andrews

Thank you very much. It's $1 million USD. I'm going to need a water break. You're going to have to take this away.

794.168 - 820.952 Zara McDonald

Okay. One million USD. So where am I picking up from what Zara put down? Just the next top point. According to an Enhanced Games commentator named Brian Johnson, when James first went into the water for protocol, he, and I quote, this is the quote from Brian Johnson, actually started sinking in the pool. James got very, very, very buff. He did not get very, very, very fast.

821.05 - 834.026 Michelle Andrews

Well, I saw this great tweet that said, and I wish I had the username in front of me, but I just remember it at the top of my head because I thought it was very funny at the time, where there was a photo of James Magnuson about to dive into the pool. And it was like, you can see his back from his front.

Chapter 4: What recommendations are shared for listeners this week?

834.526 - 837.249 Michelle Andrews

That's how huge his muscles at the back were.

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837.29 - 840.994 Zara McDonald

They couldn't find a swimsuit to fit his body, apparently.

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841.134 - 847.682 Michelle Andrews

Yeah. Unfortunately, he didn't swim quickly, though. He swam slower than when he was clean.

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847.983 - 863.443 Zara McDonald

He came last. Sorry. I don't mean to laugh. Well, you are competitive. I'm laughing at a fellow countryman. He came last in both the 50 metre and 100 metre freestyle swims. He got paid $50,000.

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864.024 - 876.701 Michelle Andrews

Sorry, not enough to be juicing your body to the gills. So when it comes to the world records at the enhanced games, at which there was that very lucrative $1 million USD on the line... There was one that was broken, Michelle.

877.142 - 900.136 Zara McDonald

Yes. But it was the final event of the night. So the Enhanced Games, a lot of their marketing was around, like, we will be smashing world records. We will define sporting history. Every event trickles on by. No world records even come close to being smashed. And then the very, very last event of the enhanced games comes up.

900.176 - 908.314 Zara McDonald

And before I tell you what I'm about to tell you, everyone, we need to give you some context because it's not like the enhanced games cares much for rules, Zara.

908.564 - 912.952 Michelle Andrews

Well, no, because they're drugging them. Drugging, yeah.

912.972 - 934.029 Zara McDonald

So as per The Guardian, the extent organisers were prepared to rip up the rulebook became clear after Canada's Bodie Santavy failed to lift more than the world's snatch record on his three permitted lifts. At that point, the PA suddenly piped up. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a surprise for you. We're going to give Bodhi one more chance. One more go.

Chapter 5: What insights are shared about the Enhanced Games' performance?

1401.637 - 1410.435 Michelle Andrews

He has, I think, a fake British accent. He's done ads with brands like Chipotle. Okay. Do you want me to play a clip of him speaking so you get the vibe? Yes, please.

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1410.856 - 1419.431 Unknown

I've just woken up with about a billion ideas pounding me from all directions. There's a bright light shining in my face.

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1421.074 - 1422.136

But I love it, baby.

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1424.319 - 1426.343 Unknown

Back on topic, Mr. Fantasy. Come on now.

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1427.943 - 1433.496 Zara McDonald

What does Mr Fantasy do? Like, as part of this narrative, what is his purpose in life?

1433.616 - 1437.966 Michelle Andrews

Well, he sings. Mr Fantasy has music. I was playing it at my desk yesterday.

1438.567 - 1439.128 Zara McDonald

Is it any good?

1440.211 - 1441.674 Michelle Andrews

Unfortunately, it wasn't bad.

1441.694 - 1442.656 Zara McDonald

Does KJ have music?

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