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SmartLess

"Macaulay Culkin"

29 Dec 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What nostalgic holiday movies does Macaulay Culkin enjoy?

4.469 - 7.517 Sean Hayes

Are you good at watching the holiday movies, the cartoons?

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7.617 - 14.294 Will Arnett

I do because it's nostalgic. It makes me feel like where I put my onesie on, you know, with the feet, the whole, the pajamas.

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14.715 - 21.212 Sean Hayes

Yeah. Do you have the little, the button sort of window that drops in the back for poops?

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23.15 - 25.032 Will Arnett

Don't beat around the bush. What are you trying to say?

25.393 - 26.234 Sean Hayes

Do you have a back flap?

26.595 - 30.72 Will Arnett

Yeah, but that's not my jeans. You're talking about my pajamas.

31.241 - 35.026 Sean Hayes

Have you watched any of the holiday videos or movies yet?

35.046 - 38.23 Will Arnett

Not yet, but I'm going to. It's going to be so exciting. Do you want to come over and watch them?

Chapter 2: How did Macaulay Culkin start his acting career?

101.079 - 105.808 Jason Bateman

We were about to call Cedars because we thought, have you checked the paddle waiting room for paddles?

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106.008 - 110.316 Will Arnett

That is the worst feeling in the world. This guy's like, I'm like, what? What are you talking about?

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110.797 - 120.775 Sean Hayes

Okay, Will, let's take a couple of, oh, sorry, Will, do you want to finish chewing that? Yeah. Okay. Fucking Will Arnett, this guy. I know. Wait, how are you guys? No, no. No, not yet.

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120.795 - 122.137 Jason Bateman

You already did that? You already did that?

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122.237 - 124.761 Sean Hayes

Let's take a guess of what we interrupted in Sean's life.

124.781 - 130.37 Jason Bateman

What was going on? What were you doing? Spaghetti. No. Sorry. Well, no, it's first thing in the morning, so that seemed like the most likely.

130.39 - 133.495 Sean Hayes

He was turning the Pop-Tart over in the oven.

133.916 - 140.207 Will Arnett

I'm going to tell you right now the honest to God truth. Passed out sleeping. Okay.

140.227 - 146.259 Sean Hayes

Because you got up too early. Yeah. Shurning butter. Our surprise guest is real lippy.

Chapter 3: What was it like for Macaulay Culkin to transition from child star to adult actor?

177.688 - 180.411 Will Arnett

And I jumped out of bed. You should smell my breath.

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180.391 - 189.202 Jason Bateman

I'm good. Hey, so what's gonna, now what's the process when we're done here? Nick gets what, a phone call or you want an in-person?

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189.563 - 205.423 Will Arnett

Yeah, no. No, I'm definitely gonna ask what happened. No, I, yeah, that's it, that's it. And my niece is here with her four friends. So there's five girls staying in the house. Oh my God, it's, they're, you know, so we were up late.

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205.463 - 208.086 Jason Bateman

Let's bring them in and have them smell your breath. Can we do that?

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208.066 - 219.023 Will Arnett

So wait, this is the daughter of who? This is my brother Dennis's daughter, Elise. And I remember her name because it rhymes with niece. Oh, that's a big deal that you remember the name of your niece? Yeah.

219.584 - 223.911 Jason Bateman

Hey, Jason, this is not a road you want to go down. Right, sorry.

223.931 - 231.416 Will Arnett

Hey, so how old is Elise? Um... She's just turned 24. She just turned 24.

231.436 - 233.318 Jason Bateman

Take the sharpness out of your voice.

233.338 - 235.88 Will Arnett

Yeah, I know. He's so mad at me, but he won't show it.

Chapter 4: What challenges did Macaulay face during his 10-year hiatus from acting?

275.582 - 285.287 Will Arnett

She goes, in the middle of the thing, she goes, Oh, my God, you guys, did you hear Jesse Eisenberg is going to give away one of his kidneys to a stranger? What? I mean, that's unbelievable.

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285.307 - 287.931 Jason Bateman

And then, by the way, that's the best part. That's the whole story.

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287.951 - 295.103 Will Arnett

And then Elise comes over the top with... And then she goes, oh my God, you guys, he's so nice. By the way, I didn't know Jesse Eisenberg was giving away a kidney to a stranger.

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295.123 - 303.394 Jason Bateman

Hang on a second. Let's get back to Taylor's comment. I mean, and that's it. I mean, that's the whole story. Was she wearing that cute thing that... What was that?

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303.795 - 313.712 Sean Hayes

Hey, so wait. So Jesse, I don't believe for one second that Jesse Eisenberg is giving away a kidney to a stranger. That's not just some sort of... It was in the news.

314.654 - 331.676 Will Arnett

Really? Yeah, it was in the news. And they go, I didn't know... You guys, oh my God, Ed Sheeran didn't use a phone. And then Ellis goes, he's so mysterious. And then I'm like, and I'm like, they all really talk like that. And like, what, this is really happening. Where are they from? Chicago, Glen Ellen.

332.517 - 333.579 Sean Hayes

So they all flew in.

334.12 - 341.854 Will Arnett

Well, they all know now they, one lives in New York and they, but they all live in the Chicagoland area and they all decided to fly in for her birthday. It was nice. It's fun.

341.834 - 343.616 Sean Hayes

It's nice of you to host them.

Chapter 5: How did Macaulay Culkin navigate fame as a child?

383.254 - 384.055 Sean Hayes

No, wait.

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384.075 - 384.436 Will Arnett

This is fun.

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385.277 - 386.619 Jason Bateman

Julie. Alondra.

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387.14 - 388.202 Sean Hayes

Alondra.

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388.503 - 392.85 Jason Bateman

Alondra. Catherine and Julie, our surprise guests, just threw in the chat.

392.83 - 396.174 Will Arnett

I wish I was close. What did the guest say?

397.035 - 398.016 Jason Bateman

Julie.

398.036 - 400.82 Will Arnett

I was close. I was close.

400.84 - 420.824 Jason Bateman

Oh, my God. All right, let's get to... Who is this person? This is the most fun guest. Sean, I'm really excited that we're catching you in this. This is the rawest we've ever seen you. I'm a nerd. You can tell I'm nervous because I... No, I know. You are nervous because you just feel you're out of sorts. You're just waking up. You're raw. And I haven't seen you this raw since fill in the blank.

Chapter 6: What role did family play in Macaulay's upbringing?

502.083 - 503.726 Will Arnett

I'm never late. Yeah, it's too late for that.

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504.647 - 507.952 Jason Bateman

No, I mean, just Taylor. When Taylor gets going, and then just forget it.

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508.032 - 510.877 Macaulay Culkin

You know what I mean? Yeah, just let her off the leash, I swear.

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511.177 - 517.106 Jason Bateman

I don't know if you heard about Ed Sheeran, but it's so mysterious. Macaulay. Macaulay Culkin.

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517.147 - 518.489 Macaulay Culkin

Macaulay.

518.769 - 520.051 Sean Hayes

Where are we finding you today?

520.492 - 525.379 Macaulay Culkin

I'm in Los Angeles, yeah. Yeah? Oh. What part? I live in Toluca Lake.

526.12 - 528.123 Sean Hayes

Oh, Toluca Lake. I've done a lot of time there.

529.145 - 532.93 Macaulay Culkin

I like how you make it sound like a prison. No. I spent a lot of time there.

Chapter 7: How does Macaulay balance fatherhood with his career?

582.469 - 589.452 Jason Bateman

Yeah, in Chicago. Yeah, Sean, hang on, Sean, Sean, hang on. We just said Chicago. Sean's also done some time there.

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591.857 - 604.24 Will Arnett

Do you want to just get it over with and then we can move on to other things? So when I was a kid and I was in high school, John Hughes was making all of his movies, as you know, in and around Chicago.

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604.26 - 605.042

I remember, yes. Remember?

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605.503 - 621.09 Will Arnett

And so, so it was wild to grow. I've said this before. It was wild to grow up in the town where he was making the movies. And then when I'm in high school, those movies came out about high school. So it was all, it was all encompassed John Hughes all the time, all around Chicago.

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621.13 - 623.835 Jason Bateman

Sean, who did you identify with? Is it Ducky?

624.355 - 631.222 Will Arnett

By the way, I got called ducky all the time. All the time. Did you really? I dressed like him and everything. Yeah.

631.822 - 635.226 Sean Hayes

Did you ever see them shooting around the neighborhood, Sean?

635.306 - 641.212 Will Arnett

No, but Lucas, you know, was filmed in my high school. If you remember that movie, Lucas. Anybody?

642.152 - 645.736 Macaulay Culkin

Yes. Charlie Sheen. Corey Haim. Corey Haim, yeah.

Chapter 8: What are Macaulay Culkin's thoughts on his legacy and future projects?

673.962 - 686.96 Macaulay Culkin

Me and Brenda are taking a bite of the forbidden fruit. We're playing brother and sister. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Wait, who is? Me and my lady, yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm going to be at the premiere.

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687.441 - 690.145 Sean Hayes

Now, what animal is your character?

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690.545 - 694.792 Macaulay Culkin

We are playing cats. That meow is literal, yeah. Oh, my God.

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694.952 - 697.836 Jason Bateman

Jason, what are you? Jason, you're a fox, right? Thanks, man.

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700.7 - 701.982 Macaulay Culkin

You had that one in the chamber.

702.583 - 710.455 Will Arnett

Wait, Macaulay, you're in Zootopia, and Jason, you didn't know which character he was? To be honest, I had no idea Macaulay was in it.

710.502 - 713.827 Macaulay Culkin

Yeah, yeah. No, are you kidding me? This is animation. Nobody meets anybody.

713.847 - 725.182 Sean Hayes

They don't let anybody know anything. Willie, tell them I'm wrong. I honestly don't even know what the film is about. I didn't know what the first film was about. I didn't know until I saw it.

725.202 - 733.594 Jason Bateman

I have had those moments. This is so embarrassing. But like Jason, where somebody goes, hey, you run into someone, they go, hey, we're doing the thing. And you go, no way.

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