“I wanted to get some CI’s, but Kelly wouldn’t let me.” No one man should wield such power. But for a while, Kelly Slater did. Or, allegedly did, at least. Back in his early tour years, Taj Burrow had lined up a batch of boards from Channel Islands Surfboards. Order placed, path clear. Then, abruptly, not happening. After some digging, word came back. Kelly Slater had intervened. No rival rides the king’s horse. Why arm the threat? We seem to get the best out of our quasi-regular host, Dane Reynolds, when he’s got some shared history with the guest. Something to look back on. Taj Burrow fits that perfectly. Both studs of the mid-to-late 2000s, same stretch of tour years, Dane essentially passing through Taj’s established timeline. The two met ten times in heats, Taj taking seven. Dane three, including a Puerto Rico exchange that featured a near-perfect Dane turn but mysteriously avoided every camera lens. Fresh off his stint as the voice box of Ethan Ewing in Stab in the Dark, and a recent run on the WSL broadcast, Taj Burrow is this week’s StabMic guest, calling in from his home in the West. The panel discuss being ageing surfers and dealing with the body refuting the mind’s will, sharing private jets with Paris Hilton in Vegas, and the feeling of needing to protect Ethan Ewing from the Stab in the Dark production machine. We’re at episode 12 already. Enjoy.

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“What did the council decide on item 42?” — answered with the speaker and the moment.

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