Chapter 1: What is the concept behind 'Strangers on a Bench'?
hello sorry to bother you um can i ask you a slightly odd question um i'm making a podcast um called strangers on a bench where essentially i talk to people i don't know on benches for 10 or 15 minutes um are you up for that do you want to give it a go Do you have a favourite day of the week?
I like Mondays and Thursdays because they're the days I come to Hampstead Heath but some of the other days I spend a lot of time writing and I like those as well so
I think they're all lovely for you.
Yeah. I mean, I'm retired. So if any day isn't lovely, it's down to me.
I like it. Yeah. You're taking full responsibility of your days.
You have to, don't you?
So why would you come to Hampstead Heath on a Monday and say not a Tuesday?
I like to give my week a shape. Like on Wednesday I receive the grocery order and on Tuesday is the day I finalise the grocery order. I do a stock check of our food.
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Chapter 2: How does the guest perceive the value of different days of the week?
When was the last time you made a wild decision on there? Do you go, I'm just suddenly going to get this?
Hmm.
maybe a month ago, when I decided to buy some Biscoff biscuits.
This went wild for the Biscoff?
Well, for no reason that I could imagine, I suddenly remembered what Biscoff biscuits tasted like. And I thought, I haven't had those for years.
So what were you doing that made you think of Biscoff? Did you see an advert for Biscoff?
No, no, there was no advert. Just some stream of consciousness.
Fantastic. And when you finally tasted the biscuits, did it... Yeah, they tasted exactly as I remembered.
Yeah, when they arrived, I cut open the packet and ate one. And then I ate another one.
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Chapter 3: What wild decisions does the guest reflect on from their past?
Because they're the kind of biscuits that one isn't enough.
That's true. I'm very naughty. I end up eating the whole pack. I can't stop myself. But you can.
I don't eat the whole pack. Well, eventually I eat the whole pack, but not in one sitting.
So Mondays on the Heath, what are we doing on Mondays on the Heath normally?
Well, I do the same walk each time. It sounds boring, but it isn't because I'm looking at the same thing time after time. I notice all the little changes.
That's lovely.
Which at this time of year, there are a lot. Because it's spring.
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Chapter 4: How does aging impact the guest's perspective on life?
Yes, because it's spring. But I mean, even at any season, there's always something is different. The route is designed so that I do one hill, which I think I need for exercise. And I used to do three hills years ago.
And now we're down to one. Down to one. We're still going strong. We've still got this one hill. Yeah.
I mean, the three hills was before I had sepsis and was ill for quite a long time. And when you get old, illness isn't like it was when you were young. When you're young, you take a few days off and you're back to where you were. As you get old, where you end up after the illness is not where you were before.
How do you feel about being old? Do you count yourself as old?
Chapter 5: What experiences shaped the guest's view on family and relationships?
Yes, I do.
In about three months, I'll be 80.
Well, happy birthday in advance. Let's make it a birthday party.
I mean, that is old, isn't it?
Well, you know, you've still got your hill.
I've still got my hill.
As long as you've got your hill, you've got a semblance of youth. How are you going to celebrate on the day? What are you going to do?
I don't know. I probably won't do anything much. I'll probably do what I would do anyway.
No, no, I'm not going to allow you.
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Chapter 6: How does the guest describe their journey with gender identity?
Yes, I suppose. What do you dream of doing? What would be a thing you haven't done that you might like to do?
What haven't I done in my life? There's a lot of things I've done in my life that I'm glad not to have done. But I really don't know. I'll have to think about it nearer the time. Is there anyone you'd like to share your birthday with? Well, yeah, maybe...
my sister i used to have three sisters and a brother now i've got a sister that's one of the things about going old the people you used to know are dead a lot of them all gone well no i've still got one don't forget there's one sister you get on okay the sister Yeah, yeah. I don't see her all that often because we don't live near to each other.
So you grew up with lots of siblings?
Yeah, yeah.
What was that like?
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Chapter 7: What challenges did the guest face in their professional life?
Well, I was born just after the war and I had three siblings who were born before the war. There was a big age gap. Well, my dad was Hitler's guest. He was a prisoner of war. Oh, right. So it was like my older siblings were...
grown-ups well they weren't but to someone as young as I was they were so they were on a bit of the same team yeah I mean one of my sisters wanted to mother me one wanted to ignore me and my brother wanted to bully me well did bully me but did your brother stop bullying you at some point Not really. Oh dear.
He's dead now. Okay, well, at least he can't bully you now. No, he can't. How did you feel about it when he died?
I didn't really feel anything much. Maybe a little bit of relief.
Chapter 8: What reflections does the guest have about their future and personal growth?
Did anyone come to your rescue during the bullying times? Did you feel like you were kind of on your own with it?
I felt I was on my own.
Why was that, do you think?
I don't know. I mean, my mother should have intervened, but she didn't. I think my mother liked my brother better than she liked me. That's complicated, isn't it? I think I was her least favourite child.
Why do you say that?
Well, if she had stuff to pass on to her children, I would be near the end of the line. Did you get anything from Mother? Well, I mean, sort of birthday and Christmas presents. I guess I got a wedding present. I can't even remember what it was. I can remember what some other people gave me, but not what my parents did.
As a wedding present? As a wedding present.
For when you got married? When I got married. When did you get married? I got married at the age of 30 in 1976. How did that go? Not brilliantly.
The wedding day or the marriage?
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