To love is to be brave | Kelly Corrigan (re-release)
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I landed as a nanny for two kids, four and seven, who had just lost their mom. The heavy lifting was left for the truly brave, a man who organized his emotions and answered the hardest questions, questions like, what is cremation? And what happens to us if you die?
That's author and podcaster Kelly Corrigan. In her powerful archive talk from 2024, she explores why navigating family life often requires extraordinary bravery and why she wouldn't want it to be any other way. From the daily challenges to surviving unexpected crises to moments of unimaginable grief, Kelly offers profound wisdom, seven key words, and a sprinkling of humor along the way to help you focus in on what matters most.
That's how the brave shine. That's all they do.
What personal experience shaped Kelly Corrigan's view on bravery?
They say, tell me more. What else? Go on. Even if they're scared of what might happen next, even if they have no training or experience to prepare them for this moment.
That's all coming up right after a short break.
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And now, our TED Talk of the day.
This is for my mom, even though when I called her to say, hey, have you heard of TED, T-E-D? She said, oh my God, Kelly, it's not another virus, is it?
LAUGHTER
As a 21-year-old, I was drawn to the word brave. I had a soft spot for ripping yarns and the people who could tell them. So, odyssey on the brain, I went out adventure collecting. Without knowing how to spell starboard or which side it referred to, I got on a 46-foot boat, and I sailed from Malta to Tunisia to Sicily. I traveled 11,000 miles over 13 months, to seven different countries without a plan or a phone or a credit card.
How does Kelly define bravery in family life?
Just $3,800 in traveler's checks, which, if you're under 30, was like a little booklet of ... perforated ... I don't know. And some expired antibiotics my mom made me bring. And then, running out of money, I landed as a nanny for two kids, four and seven, who had just lost their mom. I moved into their house so I could cover things. On the three days a week, their dad worked as a flight attendant for Qantas. I smeared sunblock on their noses and Vegemite on their toasts. I read them to sleep at night, I cleaned the counters. The heavy lifting was left for the truly brave, a man who organized his emotions and answered the hardest questions such that his kids and hers could feel a modicum of safety in a patently unsafe world.
Questions like, what is cremation? And what happens to us if you die?
What profound wisdom does Kelly offer about facing crises?
And so it is that I stood witness to the unphotographable, unmeasurable bravery of some guy named Jim in Sydney, Australia. And over the years since, I find I just can't stop cataloging these Olympic achievements in family life. The really big things often come with a game plan and a team of experts and enough adrenaline to lift a school bus over your head. But inside every crisis you think you might be ready for are 100 dirty surprises that are not in the playbook. I had stage three cancer in my 30s, and I can tell you that following the chemo schedule didn't take nearly as much courage as admitting to my husband that sex felt less sexy after my boobs, which were once a real strong suit for me,
were made weird and uneven by a surgeon's knife. Here's a surprise. My friend's father, in his final days, addled by dementia, chased her around the second floor with a fork he hid in his pajamas. They tell you there will be loss. They don't tell you you will be required to love your dad even as he's coming for you with silverware.
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