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The Adventure Zone

The Adventure Zone Royale: Episode 24

14 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What happened in the previous episode of The Adventure Zone Royale?

0.031 - 5.098 Unknown

Previously on Taz Royale. Okay, I'm going to open the piano and get Duber out.

0

5.759 - 12.548 Scorpo

Hellcrimmon, thank you. I always believed that you were good. I think Scorpo is wrong about you, sir.

0

13.509 - 16.433 Unknown

You're like a nephew to me.

0

16.834 - 17.214 Loravith

Jane?

0

17.775 - 21.46 Unknown

I could tell he had sort of a menacing aura. I mean, look at him.

21.48 - 29.703 Loravith

He looks kind of scary. Fuck. Hey, it's okay. She's going to bolt. And what's that growing out of your shoulders?

30.204 - 33.691 Helgrammet

Whoa! It's a cape potion!

34.994 - 95.293 Unknown

You wish to save the ape. And rake this thing. That's my dude. This ruined world, this hellish contest, these are the wages of the eternal mind. Give them to me and I'll free you. Hi everybody, welcome back to the Adventure Zone Taz Royale, our winner take all Battle Royale 64 enter one wizard leaves season of the Adventure Zone.

95.527 - 103.36 Loravith

Do you think about, what do you think about the subtitle instead of Royale? What do you think about Sinner Take All? Oh, that's cool. It's cool, right?

Chapter 2: How do the competitors decide who to trust during the trial?

557.544 - 558.184 Unknown

Is he conscious?

0

558.965 - 568.715 Loravith

Barely. Hippocrates, Hippocrates, if I give Franklin some bit, if I give him this vial of stuff you gave me, is that gonna help him?

0

571.257 - 579.505 Unknown

I mean, I think it's an antidote. Do you have any Advil or anything for me, maybe?

0

581.105 - 585.613 Loravith

Can I see the corpse mounds? Not quite.

0

586.554 - 589.96 Unknown

It is still further down the hallway. They do not move quite fast enough to catch up to you.

590.701 - 591.843 Loravith

How far away are they?

591.863 - 620.185 Unknown

I mean, like 50 feet. Okay, I cast Wither and Bloom. Now, do you need line of sight on them? Because they are on a different floor of the house than you. It says the range is 60 feet. Okay. Does it say any creature in your line of sight? It says they're on a point within range. Okay, cool. Yeah, you can do that. You know where they are, right?

620.346 - 639.137 Unknown

And these things are moving slow enough that you can target that pretty easily. All right, Wither and Bloom. Is this a con save as well? This is, Wither and Blooms is a con save, yeah, 14. That is an 11. So they're gonna take some damage.

640.74 - 646.65 Loravith

Five points of damage and Hippocrates can use a hit dice to heal. Okay.

Chapter 3: What challenges do the wizards face as the zombie threat increases?

1072.816 - 1078.332 Loravith

I'm going to cast. lightning lure. Okay, cool. On them.

0

1078.512 - 1079.213 Unknown

Yeah, absolutely.

0

1079.433 - 1094.055 Loravith

That's my guy. This is your OG spell, right? This is your original gamut? Yeah, my OG spell. It's narratively important. Yeah, I love it. I failed so miserably at kicking the first time. Okay. And I forgot. You gotta succeed on a strength saving throw.

0

1094.295 - 1114.66 Unknown

Oh, a strength save. Okay. You whip the lightning lure down around some of these zombies and as you pull, they pull and... That is only a six. Strength save. They are not the strongest little guys. What happens next? They're now going to take 2d8 damage.

0

1114.8 - 1124.433 Loravith

Okay. Roll that for me. And I think rather than like trying to tug them towards me, he's kind of like yanking the whole pile up in the air.

1124.453 - 1141.476 Unknown

Just like chuck it. 13 points of damage. That is enough. You whip your lightning lure and it wraps around these three zombies. You fling them upwards and as they kind of fly into the air and collide with the ceiling as they come landing back down.

1141.456 - 1163.633 Unknown

uh they are uh they are completely motionless and still and this corpse mound is defeated okay and laura says i'll pop on the way and he jumps out the wind like flies out the window with the cape wait out the window or the door the door into the library or the window out to the woods

1165.334 - 1178.403 Loravith

I mean, the door, I mean, I guess I'm flying into the library. Okay, cool. Well, okay, first of all, before I fly away. I got to do a quick dig around. It's a big corpse pile.

1178.804 - 1179.305 Unknown

Yeah, sure.

Chapter 4: How does the sacrifice of a character impact the trial's outcome?

1512.215 - 1515.118 Loravith

I saved him. Who saved who? I saved him.

0

1515.138 - 1518.662 Unknown

I was trapped in a piano being assaulted by a giant zombie and he saved me.

0

1518.682 - 1525.21 Loravith

Who saved who, Doober? It sounds like you saved him in much the same way you saved me. No, he didn't save me. But you already saved me. He didn't save me.

0

1525.39 - 1527.652 Helgrammet

I saved him. Bad news, Bugman.

0

1527.693 - 1528.834 Loravith

He already has a ward.

1528.874 - 1531.677 Helgrammet

Pretty clear cut. I saved him.

1531.825 - 1578.263 Loravith

Loraveth, Loraveth, when you trigger the sigil, sigil? Sigil. Sigil. Sigil. Okay. When you hit the thing, did it, like, disappear completely? Can we turn it back on? I have a sense it was a one-way sort of deal. the hardest part of any idea, any project, any dream is just getting started, just getting moving, just taking one foot and putting it out there.

1578.283 - 1596.023 Loravith

And maybe that foot for you is going to be via Squarespace. You know, building a website can be a really good way of organizing your ideas. It can be a great way of bringing other people into what you're making and saying, hey, like I made this this idea. This is where we're at. What do you think?

1596.444 - 1616.221 Loravith

And it's going to look like someone who really knew their business made this website because it's real, real templates created by world class designers who really know their way around designing web pages. And so you're going to be looking like, hey, I really know my business. I'm looking pretty, pretty smart over here. You want to sell stuff. You want to share your designs.

Chapter 5: What strategies do the characters use to survive the zombie onslaught?

2079.225 - 2088.075 Loravith

Duber? We're both watching now. Wait, turn out your pockets. Make sure there's no bacon or anything in there.

0

2088.455 - 2095.186 Scorpo

I love a rasher with bacon. From Mama Bacon's Bakery.

0

2095.206 - 2097.951 Helgrammet

Come on.

0

2097.931 - 2110.09 Unknown

Give me a persuasion check, both of you. Loraveth with advantage because you do have a sort of pre-existing relationship. A crit would be so funny here, Dad. Not to tell you your business, but a crit would be hysterically funny.

0

2111.011 - 2112.554 Duber

A persuasion check, is that what we're doing? Yeah.

2113.074 - 2118.443 Loravith

That is a 17, dude. 17. What? I have a... That's a match.

2118.463 - 2121.107 Unknown

Oh my God. That's a tie, a 17 from Loraveth.

2121.127 - 2131.228 Loravith

That's incredible. Griffin, now that's your problem now. You have advantage. You get to roll one more, Loraveth. Oh, that's right, that's right. It's torn. Okay, so this is narratively right.

2131.568 - 2144.727 Unknown

He can't decide. I don't know. Helgram had saved me, and so I feel like I owe him one more. Oh, that's a crit. That's a crit from Loraveth. Son of a bean. Oh, wait, that's Rick that's rolled that. Why are you rolling that? Travis, there's no reason why Duber would want to go with you.

Chapter 6: How do the characters interact with the environment during the trial?

2531.035 - 2561.405 Unknown

You feel the heat from this fire sort of enrobe your hand and see the blue flames kind of begin to vanish. And in just an instant, you have sucked up the blue fire. And you are also sort of imbued with it for, what is it, your next melee attack on your next turn. You will do 2d6 extra damage of fire. So make sure you remember that because I won't. And you suck it up.

0

2561.425 - 2563.988 Unknown

Give me a dexterity saving throw, please, immediately.

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2565.52 - 2587.596 Loravith

Dexterity saving throw immediately. Yes. A quick brain update. I did zone out a little bit mid-sentence, but tuned back in for make sure you remember that. Awesome, awesome, awesome. Because I won't. So that was a fun. And my dex saving is a three minus one, two.

0

2587.576 - 2609.449 Unknown

Okay, you- Lorem has also zoned out. Yeah, apparently. You reach in, you absorb these flames, and you have a moment of satisfaction as you reach your hand in and see that you have successfully retrieved the blue fire. However, you feel instantly-

0

2609.429 - 2642.581 Unknown

As soon as that fire disappears, a painful sort of crunch on your outstretched hand, and you look down to see the undead form of Dr. Legume in one of these crawl spaces behind the fire, who has reached out to chomp your hand. His eyes appear to be sort of a faint sort of yellow. He doesn't appear to be sort of triggered by you. This just appears to be kind of a reflexive thing.

2644.043 - 2645.665 Unknown

You are going to take... Give me a con save.

2645.685 - 2646.306 Duber

So is he just playing?

2646.546 - 2647.247 Unknown

What's that?

2647.868 - 2648.489 Duber

Is he just playing?

Chapter 7: What is the significance of the colored rooms in the mansion?

3154.435 - 3170.796 Unknown

Quick. Hippocrates is going to look back at you, spread his feathers out, and just kind of chicken run out of the room. What do you do? I blast it with rare frost. Okay, make another attack roll. This one I will need you to make an attack roll because this is a candle you're aiming for. God damn, dude. 18 plus 6.

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3170.776 - 3200.361 Unknown

uh the flame on this candle grows sort of like flare bright and it starts to expand out and then contract uh ready to go supernova and in that instance you just hit the wick of it with your ray of frost and send it out i was fully ready to just nuke hippocrates here if you hadn't run fast enough or figured out what was going on fast enough uh but thanks to your heroism once again you have pulled hippocrates ass out of the fire he looks at you and says wow um

0

3201.843 - 3207.708 Unknown

Why are you saving me so much? Eventually we're gonna have to kill each other, right?

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3208.509 - 3211.011 Loravith

But now is not your time.

0

3211.892 - 3229.588 Unknown

Okay, man, thank you. And he is going to make his way back into the study. Pranklin catches up to you. You can see sort of back into the study, Rictus, that the sort of map over the fireplace only has one sort of square still lit up, which is the red square up in the corner.

3229.568 - 3255.189 Unknown

But for right now, we're going to hop back down into the master suite where Hellgrammet, Dr. Legume, has begun to climb towards you, eyes blood red. Okay. Hellgrammet turns his head a little bit to the side and speaks to Doober and says... Hey, Duber, let's fire one up. And he hits Dr. Legume with Scorching Ray. Okay, go ahead and give me an attack roll. Dr. Legume is prone.

3255.229 - 3286.981 Unknown

I'm going to say you have advantage on this attack roll. He is not in melee distance, so you do not take the disadvantage of making a ranged attack like that. And let's see. Here we go. That would be a 16. 16 absolutely hits. Give me that big nasty fire damage, please. That big nasty fire damage is a three. Yikes, yikes. Don't do that. Yikes, yikes, yikes. It is a three.

3287.001 - 3312.192 Unknown

However, it is also a six because as you blast Dr. Lycum with the fire and sort of cut a path kind of across his body, you can see where the beam kind of ripped across him. You can see sort of the mottled flesh kind of cinder and burn. However, he is going to continue his pursuit of you. Here's also what I was going for. In the movie Hellfighters starring John Wayne,

3313.184 - 3332.175 Unknown

They would have oil well fires. Beloved non-problematic figure. Do you have a non-problematic cowboy figure that you could use? No, because nobody else. Can you say like a Walton Goggins? Jim Hutton was in Hellfighters 2. I don't know who that is, but he's probably old enough to have some skeletons in the closet. Okay, well, then that works then.

Chapter 8: What are the consequences of the characters' actions by the end of the episode?

4295.461 - 4330.606 Unknown

i think um laura vith uh as you dispatch randolph uh and uh you know clear this room uh now i'd like you to give me an insight check please on on duber who still seems to be kind of stock still uh okay That is a six. You... And? How do you feel about that? Here's what I'll tell you with a six. Duber looks scared of you as you sort of reappear in this room that you've just blown to smithereens.

0

4331.367 - 4345.903 Unknown

And for just a moment, I think, you wonder, like, is it maybe because I just obliterated Randolph? But Duber looks at you and sort of composes himself, wipes a tear from his eye, and says...

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4348.027 - 4360.398 Scorpo

Randolph attacked you before anything else happened. Did you kill Randolph, Loravith? Was it you?

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4362.04 - 4375.772 Loravith

Duber, I want to answer your question. But first, I have to ask you one very important clarifying question about killing Randolph.

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4378.283 - 4386.083 Rictus

Which time?

4406.853 - 4423.984 Unknown

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