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The Agenda

"Egyptian Heartbreak"

23 Jun 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What happened during the All Whites' defeat to Egypt?

1.769 - 30.949 José Trajano

Oh, g'day, James McHoney.

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31.857 - 49.935 G Lane

Hey, G-Lane. Coming in to us live from Canada, looking very, very sunny and bright, and you look quite relaxed as well, which is really pissing me off. Hello, Terrence. Hello, Pellet. I just farted on your face. Hey, happy World Test Championship Day.

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51.156 - 55.701 Jason Hoyte

Yeah, oh. Shammy again with the shammy. Wow. Comes in, bowls to Taylor. What? Yes!

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57.602 - 85.675

And it's going to go. for sex i think and after so much heartache after so much pain after so much suffering the new zealand cricketers are now champions of the world i'm not shaking my back

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86.212 - 88.395 G Lane

At that stage, we ripped off Jason Hoyt's top.

Chapter 2: How did the Hurricanes perform against the Chiefs in the Super Rugby Final?

88.415 - 94.422 G Lane

He got his baps out and we covered him in champagne. What a six nights that was, James McCarney, back in 2021.

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94.902 - 125.58 James McOnie

Wow, that was, yeah, I remember Jason Hoyt's baps. The whole occasion, that test match, obviously Kyle Jameson, man of the match, I believe. It was just so amazing that they finally sort of got the big – big trophy that they'd long sort of deserved and desired. And, um, yeah, it sort of erased the memories a little bit of, um, of 2019, but Hey, that was, that was a cool moment.

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125.7 - 139.219 James McOnie

And, uh, I see that you're, you're calling for the statue, uh, the Ross and Kane walking off the pitch where I think, I believe Kane, uh, said to Ross in that moment, we fucking did it, mate. And, um,

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Chapter 3: Who is in and out of Dave Rennie's first All Blacks squad?

140.482 - 143.827 James McOnie

And you want that statue at the basin, is that right?

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144.027 - 161.992 G Lane

Yeah, I think we want it outside the J.R. Reid gates there at the basin. That's what we're campaigning for. We'll see what happens. We might have to just 3D print one and put it there ourselves. We'll see what happens. But let's get into it, James, because I've got a lot of questions for you because you are over there for the FIFA World Cup.

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162.012 - 189.912 G Lane

So let's kick it in the guts live from the Export Beer Garden studio. This is the agenda for Tuesday, the 23rd of June. the agenda podcast the home of sporting nonsense and claptrap brought to you by export ultra oh it started so well didn't it james yesterday against egypt looked confident back of the net first kind of 15 minutes let it half time what what what happened what happened

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Chapter 4: What are the key moments from the World Cup match against Egypt?

191.798 - 215.275 James McOnie

Yeah, in the first half they were walking like an Egyptian and the second half they ran like Egyptians and we didn't realise they could run that way. All of our research on the bangles, obviously that song and the hieroglyphics just got thrown out the window. But I am still kind of Egyptian in the fact that I am in denial

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215.255 - 239.727 James McOnie

about the referee who was an absolute shocker, a guy from the Emirates, United Arab Emirates. So I know it's not the same country, but it's kind of like somebody from Palmy saying, no, he's not on our side, he's from Fielding. He gave one particularly bad call, G-Lane. Did you see that when Ben Old got trampled on his nutsack?

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239.707 - 243.33 G Lane

Yeah. I think that was his first ever international, wasn't it?

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243.471 - 244.231 James McOnie

It was his debut.

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244.251 - 252.559 G Lane

It was his debut game. Thanks, FIFA. You give someone their debut game at a FIFA World Cup, a debut international? It's a strange decision.

253.4 - 256.003 James McOnie

Yeah, it's always been a big problem.

Chapter 5: How did the referee impact the All Whites' match against Egypt?

256.123 - 268.735 James McOnie

And then as the tournament goes on, you'll see the crazy Italian with the staring eyes, the ball guy. Oh, yes. The cream rises to the top. But for poor souls like us in New Zealand, yeah, we've got no chance.

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268.715 - 291.408 James McOnie

Look, the two of the goals were defensive errors, the headers, but it was just mainly, there was a couple of moments that I could tell this ref was completely cooked, and that was when he gave Sarpreet Singh a yellow card for pretty much doing nothing. The guy was backing into him and Sarpreet was trying to get around him normally. And then he just goes, no, that's a yellow card.

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292.129 - 313.099 James McOnie

And Sarpreet, being a decent human, just goes, oh, you know, shrugs his shoulders. Whereas any other, let's call them any one of the sort of fiery nations would just be going, what the hell is going on here? But, you know, we take it in our stride. And then that actually happened a little bit. He did give Egypt a yellow card, but the guy didn't.

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314.142 - 325.975 James McOnie

basically kicked Sarpreet in the head, you know, he went to hit the ball and it was like, this is kind of, it's almost a red, right? It's almost a red, but it was more that Ben Old was clearly fouled.

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326.275 - 342.512 James McOnie

I mean, down that end of the pitch, you know how football's weird that the touch judge can't go past halfway, they have their area, so there's always this sort of blind spots down the two opposite diagonal ends of the pitch and that's where all that stuff went down, where Ben Old said that he had his

342.492 - 364.838 G Lane

um nuts trampled on and then had to replace his shorts and undies they're both ripped oh yeah i've got the quote here he said i've touched the ball and then i feel like he's fouled me and then as i'm going down he's fallen on my ball sack and ripped my shorts and underwear so i'm just standing there like that well it's lucky he didn't rip his ball sack open by the sounds of it

365.948 - 371.158 James McOnie

Joe, you could have got the actual audio quote off the Crowd Goes Wild. I can't believe you're not supporting.

373.563 - 381.137 G Lane

Please send it through. I'll just credit Crowd Goes Wild audio. Yeah, yeah. We tend to get shut down if we steal your audio, James.

382.64 - 385.626 James McOnie

That's only me getting pissed off.

Chapter 6: What is the atmosphere like for Kiwis in Vancouver during the World Cup?

423.213 - 444.687 James McOnie

And you know what? I didn't say it was on stuff. I probably can't even say that on this podcast. They had the footage of it. And it looked so cool. But then I was just thinking, we've got to change the name. They look like penguins, so why not call them the penguins, the March of the Penguins? I thought it was fine. We need to do something about their name. But... The vibes were great.

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444.948 - 462.897 James McOnie

The noise when Egypt scored was totally deafening, and it carried on. It wasn't just one massive cheer. It felt like three, four, five minutes of cheering. It was unbelievable. Did you see the Egyptian fan after the game going, go back to rugby?

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462.937 - 464.62 G Lane

Yeah, it was a good call, actually.

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465.241 - 475.099 James McOnie

It's not bad, but I mean, hey, go back to locking up journalists, human rights lawyers, and political opponents to the regime, Egypt.

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475.38 - 478.265 G Lane

And go back to building some pyramids.

479.507 - 495.142 James McOnie

Well, that's something they're quite proud of. Go way back to building those pyramids, mate. But no, I think... Yeah, look, it's a country of 120 million. You'd hope they'd be good at their favorite sport after squash. Squash, yeah.

Chapter 7: What feedback did listeners provide in the 'Yours Please' segment?

495.182 - 504.259 G Lane

Why is squash so big there? In my mind, Egypt is squash. Remember they did the world championships at the pyramids in the glass box?

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504.914 - 521.286 James McOnie

They're used to playing squash in pyramids and the bounce is horrendous. So you've actually got to get really good with that angle wall, you know. So once they go into the normal sort of glass cage of emotions of squash, it's easy for them, you know. They're used to the prism.

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521.266 - 535.703 G Lane

You mentioned that video that was on stuff because I did watch that of the march of the neo-Nazis. And I don't know if you watched at the start of it. There's people at the front holding a big long banner and a poor lady was trying to cross the road.

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536.143 - 556.434 G Lane

She may have been a lady who might have not had a home, but she had like a little tiny shopping trolley and she tried to cross in front of them and she got caught up in the front banner. And then they had to stop it and she had to untangle herself from the banner and gather her stuff back into her shopping trolley and carry on. It just kind of ruined the vibe of the whole thing.

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556.594 - 558.999 G Lane

But most of the people.

559.299 - 563.828 James McOnie

Sometimes people get in the way of a beautiful scene, you know, like was she a boomer?

564.314 - 570.304 G Lane

No, no, no. I think she was a homeless lady who just managed to just walk.

570.464 - 590.777 James McOnie

She thought the streets were... Well, that is sad, but for other reasons, other reasons. But I was just going to say, boomers on tour are kind of interesting, aren't they? Like, I'm convinced they've got a form of kind of Tourette's, not with the swearing, but just with blurting stuff out and slightly drunk. You know, they just... And even, you know, that sort of...

590.977 - 598.668 James McOnie

The unwritten rule that when you stand by the conveyor belt, you leave a meter gap, you know? No, no. They don't observe that rule.

Chapter 8: What are the implications of the All Blacks' squad announcement?

808.148 - 828.897 James McOnie

And then it was kind of funny when they played some of the Egyptian songs. I sort of thought, I bet you there are better Egyptian songs, but they've really just Googled most popular Egyptian song and probably whatever the government's approved. is what you've got, you know, but there must be, you go to a party in Egypt with the real Egyptians, they'll be like, no, we don't listen to that.

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829.297 - 836.748 James McOnie

We listen to this. Because they also play, have you heard when a goal's scored, it's sold a slice of heaven. Yes, I heard that.

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837.029 - 844.36 G Lane

Yep, I did hear that. So this Saturday against Belgium, it's a bit of a tough ask, isn't it? It's a must win.

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846.228 - 866.707 James McOnie

The only thing, our only saving grace is that Belgium have shat their bed plenty of times at the last World Cup they did anyway. The previous one, they were very good. But in Qatar, they were supposed to be one of the favourites and it didn't work out that way. Now, they've still got ageing players like De Bruyne sort of getting on.

867.148 - 893.078 James McOnie

Not super old, but, you know, not compared to Ronaldo and Messi, quite young. But... So I feel like that and Jeremy Doku who plays for Man City has been under an injury cloud. All of that stuff can help, I think. And probably the fact that Belgium have drawn their last two games, even though they'll be desperate as well, they were desperate in Qatar and they sort of unraveled a bit.

893.098 - 894.36 James McOnie

So maybe there's something there.

894.54 - 910.542 G Lane

Oh, so you think the pressure's on them then? We can just go and play free and easy footy because, you know, we have nothing to lose. The expectations on the All Whites are at a minimum. And Belgium, like we just said, they've drawn twice. They have to win, don't they?

911.585 - 927.369 James McOnie

Yeah, I think this whole team, I agree with that, G-Lane. We've got nothing to lose. We play with a bit more freedom. We've got this young core of players who it's really their team now. Like, I remember 2010 was Ryan Nelson's team. Yeah. And then the recent years, it's been Chris Wood's team.

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