"Manaia Vs Willie Mason"

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The Agenda 1h 1m 4 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 6 days ago
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What happened in G‑Lane’s shocking manscaping story?

Tony Lyall 0:00
G'day Tony. Good morning, G-Lane. How are you on this blusterous Thursday morning? I've got,
G Lane 0:05
um, I've got a, I've had an
Tony Lyall 0:07
incident. Oh no.
G Lane 0:09
So I've had an incident. Um, as you can see, I shaved my moustache off.
Tony Lyall 0:13
Yes, you have. I noticed that when you walked in, it's like seeing a teacher at the supermarket. You go, oh,
G Lane 0:18
what's going on there? So it was quite a bushy moustache, and the only way to deal to such a large Ned Flanders slug was to take to it with some clippers. Of course. Some, like, beard trimmer clippers. So when you – I know you would have trimmed your beard on trimming stuff. Of course. The hair kind of flies everywhere. Yeah. And so the best place to do it is just to nude up and just do it before you have a shower in the shower. That's my – No. So I was in the shower and had the clippers and I was doing the moustache and it was basically, it was just flopping down to the floor, all this hair off my mow. And I had the number two guard on the trimmers. Yeah. And I looked down, and I looked downstairs, and I'm like, well, I'm here already.
G Lane 1:03
Oh, of course. There was quite a few pole creepers. Yeah, of course. So I looked down, and I was like, oh, I might as well deal with the pole creepers. They haven't been down there and deforested in
Matt Chandler 1:10
quite some
G Lane 1:11
time. So got rid of a couple of pole creepers. Then I got distracted. And at some stage, the number two guard fell off. And I basically put a fire break straight through the middle of my pubes. And I looked down and it wasn't a clean one either. It... I looked down there and it looked like a homeless hamster. There was hair patches everywhere. And so I kind of had a decision to make. You got to scorch the earth. Yeah, I had a decision to make and it was like, well, I can't leave it like that.
Tony Lyall 1:49
No.
G Lane 1:50
So, yeah, I had to do scorched earth. Then I had another issue because you scorch earth it.
Tony Lyall 1:54
Yeah, you go full little boy.
G Lane 1:55
But then I'm full 12, like 11-year-old boy, but then – Where do you stop? Because then I've got my snail trail that runs up to my stomach that almost connects to my chest here.
Tony Lyall 2:04
You run a reverse fade, I think. You sort of fade up into a snail trail. I think just join the snail trail, join the others, just shave it all off. I mean, we've got a little bit before it's like summertime and you're going to be full shirt off. I mean, also, there's a few things going on here. Firstly, I don't believe you. I don't think that it just fell off. I think that you took it off. You flew too close to the sun. You were thinking, how short can I get this before it looks – Before I do go full 11-year-old boy and then you did one shave and thought, oh, fuck. Secondly, I don't think you hit the mow in the shower. I think that's – No, you
G Lane 2:36
do it in the sink. It flies everywhere.
Tony Lyall 2:38
You just sort of like lean in close to the mirror and sort of do it there. And also if you do it in the shower and you're shaving your mow, you can't give yourself a – what is this, three minutes in? You can't give yourself a Hitler. Which is the main thing you do when you cut
Matt Chandler 2:52
a
Tony Lyall 2:53
moustache. And I'd say every single listener out there has done it at least once. As you're shaving off a moustache, you just leave the middle and you look in the mirror and you go, ooh.
G Lane 3:00
Well, stupidly, I did that and I sent a photo to Joe Jury.
Tony Lyall 3:02
Yeah, never do
G Lane 3:03
that. No, and it's on his phone. You want
Tony Lyall 3:05
to see it? You were literally giving ammunition to the enemy.
G Lane 3:08
My hair is plastered down to the
Tony Lyall 3:09
left as well. Oh, no. You went full
G Lane 3:11
Hitler. Yes, I did. You
Tony Lyall 3:15
need to see it. I mean, we've all done it and looked in the mirror and thought, oh, that's a lot. None of us are like, oh, I better send a photo of this to an employee.
G Lane 3:23
No, no, no. I mean, you send it to someone that you trust.
Tony Lyall 3:26
Yeah, this is true.
G Lane 3:27
So I guarantee you, you don't do it just for yourself. You send it to one or two people that you know will go,
Tony Lyall 3:32
nah. And I guess for you, sitting at a Joe jury, it's like, what's another? He's already got a full portfolio of cancelable photos on his phone. What's another one?
G Lane 3:41
And also, you just cry AI. Or you could cry Charlie Chaplin.

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