"No Comeback For The Pinot Wahs"
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What’s the opening banter about the cat being away and the mice playing?
Well, welcome in to the Agenda Podcast. Matt Heath and Matt, big news today. Well, the cat is away. There's no G-Lane here, so the mouse shall play. We can talk about whatever we want.
Oh, that's good. What do we want to talk about?
Well, I don't know. Do you want
to talk about any... Whenever he's away, I always sort of share some kind of horrific story about G-Lane from the past.
Well, let's get straight into it. But
I think I've just shared them all.
Well, there must be one deep dark down in the wreaths of your brain that you've never shared, that you've sort of been waiting for this exact
moment. I'm not sharing that one.
You're not sharing that one? No. Now, there's still a thing he likes to do. You know, the AC, it's, I'd say, moderately successful. You know, it sits in a tranche of media brands, your likes of, you know, you've got your ZDM, your Newstalk ZB. These are heavy hitters. Yeah. And yet, when we go away, we are still forced to all sleep in one big room like we're going on like a 12-year-old sleepover. Is that still happening? It's still happening. And I think it's because G-Lane loves the yarn. He loves the stories that come out of it. He knows that if he does force us into these sort of pressure cooker situations, it'll inevitably sort of
yield some content. See, what you do is it's the Mania Heath and Mania Stewart and Matt Heath method. You just snore like a motherfucker. And then G-Lane doesn't want to sleep in a room with you anymore and you get your own room.
Yeah, it's a good option. Well, I think I had the new guy on campus treatment. We went away to Wanaka and Joe Jury and G-Lane were very happy to give me the room with the double bed. We had a little Airbnb
and there
was one room with a double bed and then one that had Bert and Ernie's situation. And they were like, you know, you go in there. You definitely go in there. And it sort of felt like a reverse hierarchy where I'm like, surely is the new man in? Aren't I given the worst? And in both, the second place we stayed in Queenstown, the Sherwood, beautiful accommodation. But there was one room, a main room with a double bed that I got. And then they slept in the lounge on sort of fold out. Yeah, right. What do they call a bed that sort of folds too? It's got some sort of slang name. Yeah, something. A bufter or something like this. It seems like a slur. And I think they've almost become accustomed to sleeping in each other's comfort zone.
What's interesting is if you tour with Jeremy Wells and there's a Bert and Ernie situation, he'll try and double Bert or double Ernie. So there'll be two beds and he'll come and try and sleep in your bed with you
and
leave a spare bed. He always says things like, well, let's use one of the beds to store our luggage on so we can access our luggage and we'll both sleep in one of the single beds.
It's
just the way he rolls. So it depends who you're with, how you end up cutting the sleeping arrangements.
But if
it's Jerry, it's two in a single. And
does he proposition this as soon as you walk in or is this when you get home from the pub late at night? Is that when he comes a-crawling?
It's just sort of an unwritten rule, but also he insists on being the small spoon, which is like weird because he's, you know, I'm probably only about 6'1", 6'2", but he'd be 6'4".
Yeah, it's shocking to hear you say you're 6'2". I said probably. Yeah, probably. If you've never measured
yourself, you could be anything. Within, let's say, within four inches.
I think that is a great move for a short man. Okay,
let's be more accurate. I'm 5'11". Yeah,
sure.
5'12". And Jerry's 6'3", 6'4". So it's quite intimidating to be the small spoon on someone that big. Well, you've just got a big face and
the back of his head must sit right at face height. That's the whole point of spoon. But it does feel good to be the little spoon, especially because I'm a tall guy as well. I'm 6'3". And if I am ever in a position where I get to be little spoon – It's a treat. Really? Yeah, you feel held, you feel safe. But apparently
like a relationship has only got about two weeks left if your partner, if she starts big spooning you.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What’s the opening banter about the cat being away and the mice playing?
0:00–7:15
2
How did the Hyrox toilet fiasco develop and why does it matter?
7:15–14:47
3
What’s new in Matt Heath’s F1 Corner and how did Max Verstappen dominate the 100‑kart challenge?
14:47–20:43
4
Will the Pinot Wahs movement make a comeback for the Warriors at Eden Park?
20:43–26:31
5
What’s the ‘Yours Please’ segment and why is it called the greatest rugby analogy in New Zealand?
26:31–34:21
6
What are the current ticketing headaches for big events and how could they be solved?
34:21–42:57
7
What’s the latest on the Eden Park upgrades and the Warriors’ upcoming match?
42:57–50:25
8
How do the hosts wrap up the episode and what final thoughts do they leave listeners with?
50:25–51:28