Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Morning, Matt Heath. Morning, Meshie. Boys. Gotta cook it up. Come on and cook it up. Breaking news.
Chapter 2: What is the breaking news about NZ Cricket and the NZ20 franchise?
Breaking news. Well, it's already broken by the time we put this podcast out.
Chapter 3: What were Mashy's Top 3 Moments from the Super Rugby weekend?
But New Zealand Cricket, the board has made a decision. Good God. And they have decided in their infinite wisdom to support the T20 NZ20 league franchise option. Wow. That's a great result. It took them a while to get there, didn't it? Yeah. Didn't I just announce the other day that we're going to take ages to decide?
Chapter 4: How did the Black Caps perform in the 4th T20 match?
Yeah. I think they've copped so much grief from everyone. But the thing is, this is the statement. It says, New Zealand cricket will pursue the proposed NZ20 franchise league as a preferred option for its domestic T20 competition. But here come all the caveats. The New Zealand board has made an in-principle decision to support the establishment of the new league.
Could someone have a pair of testicles anywhere near the organisation? It's subject to satisfactory resolution of key commercial, structural and governance matters. So basically everything to do with the league. For it to happen in time, don't they have to just go balls to the wall to get it done? Hang on, there's more caveats here. While not a final commitment, Oh, my God.
Chapter 5: What are the latest updates on the Warriors' performance?
The decision allows NZC to focus resources on advancing discussion toward a potential license. There is so much fluffiness in this. And a binding commercial arrangement with the NZ20 League. NZ board chair Diana Puketapu-Lyndon said recognising NZ20 as a preferred option was a significant step in the process. That is the most pathetic thing I've ever heard in my life.
She said the boards thoroughly debated the choice between potential expansion of Australia's Big Bash. addressing all central issues involved.
Chapter 6: What feedback do listeners have about the show?
He quoted, there was extensive discussion on the merits of these proposals, but the board concluded that now's the right time to revitalise our 21-year-old Super Smash competition. Wow. What's a 21-year-old? This followed broad consultation, particularly within our cricket network. and careful consideration of a wide range of information and advice, including the Deloitte Report.
The next steps include working with NZ22... Can I just say, can I just stop you there and say the fact that they got consultants in when they're a board and supposed to be in charge of cricket, and then they cowardly got some consultants in? This is several changes to the original NZ20 proposal needed to be negotiated before a final decision was made.
In particular, we want to work with NZ20 to ensure it incorporates and supports the women's domestic T20 competition, that it maintains a level of prominence and visibility consistent with the New Zealand cricket's strategic commitment to the women's game.
That's what I like to hear.
Ensuring regional representation. She also noted the NZ brand carried significant global value. So? bolstered by the impressive performances of its national teams in the ICC. Yeah, okay, whatever. This is an exciting time, blah, blah, blah. We owe it to everyone to negotiate an outcome that best serves the interest of the game here. And we're confident.
Just have some guts.
Just actually do something. If you want it to succeed, you have to go hard against the odds. Everyone's swimming in the same direction to get something done. to save the game that you guys have driven into a cliff. And you release that. That says, if you're Peter Volandes, if he was in that boardroom, He would have said- Well, he would have said, New Zealand without NZ20 is not New Zealand.
It said, you guys are a bunch of idiots. If you want this to work, you're just going to have to go hard. Yeah. You can't be pissing around with your stupid chat GPT, 58 ways to get out if you don't do it bullshit.
There's so many caveats now.
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Chapter 7: What are the challenges faced by NZ Cricket in the new T20 league?
But no, that says that they're going to waste as much time as they can on bullshit that's got nothing to do with making it work. Hey, hey, hey. No, they're not. They're going to spend time on key commercial, structural, and governance matters. Chat GPT is a terrible drug. It's a terrible drug. Yeah, Copilot has written this. It said, can you write a press statement?
We're not to suck the life out of any hope of this actually happening. We want to slow it down as much as possible, but I want as many outs as I can so I can never be blamed for anything that ever happens. So can it say nothing whilst protecting me completely? It's all right. I love how all these statements always say, in capital, ends at the end.
It's like, okay, I know it's ended because you finished it with a sentence at the end.
What is the job of the board of NZ Cricket if it's not to make a decision? So they've outsourced their research or whatever it must be to Deloitte.
Yeah, fantastic.
They've now gone to co-pilots to write their press release. What are they doing? So their job is to just pull the handbrake slightly on it. I think so.
Do they not know how hard it is for something like this to work? Yeah, I know. And if you start throwing caveats around and you're looking for outs and you're clearly signalling that you're a wimp who's too scared to actually do anything... then how are you going to succeed? I'm happy that they're going this direction. Are they going in that direction? They kind of are.
Because the other thing, they had never been invited into the bloody Big Bash anyway. It's like deciding whether they go to a party or another party and they haven't received an invite to the other one.
Yeah, on a similar analogy, it's a little bit like my missus inviting me to a family Christmas that she's not even that excited about. And it's like, well, hang on, if you're not excited about it, how am I supposed to be excited about it?
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Chapter 8: What humorous anecdotes about seagulls and their behavior are shared?
I don't know if you boys saw the Crusaders-Moana game. It was a shitter of a first half.
Oh, it was 16-14 or something?
Yeah, and it deserved to be about six points to five, if anything. And then the Crusaders got up and Rob Penny ended the game with a smile on his face.
His sidestep was the most hilarious. I think he was more surprised than anyone. When he ripped a step out and actually beat the player, you could see his face go, oh, shit, there's a gap there. I love when props do that, eh? Yeah.
I love those old big boys having a step. Second moment of the round. You would have loved this one, Matty, Heath, and so would have you, G-Lane. It was Angus Gardner. Oh, yes. Getting clipped.
He got... Yeah, well, I believe Cameron Five has probably been served a cease and desist order because it was getting a little problematic how much he was zooming in on the... Oh, Angus Gardner. Oh, Angus Gardner's down. What's going on? Oh, no. They're playing on the riffs, not there. There was so much going on. Hugh Renton. Did you see any of this, Matt? No.
Hugh Renton, who's the big number eight for the Highlanders, the big giant Jono Pryor. He basically brushed Angus Gardner, like literally just brushed his shoulder, and then he went down like a sack of shit. like face first into the grass, and you can hear him here whimper and go, oh, I'm down, I'm down. It's like he's practising in a simulation. Listen to this one again.
You can hear it in the background. I believe camera five has probably been served a cease and desist order because it was getting a little problematic how much he was zooming in on the... Oh, Angus Gardner. Oh, Jesus, Gardner's down. What's going on? Oh, no. They're playing on. The ref's not there. Oh, no. Anyway, he shook it off. It took him a while, though.
They had medics out there holding his neck and everything. They were going to bring the helicopter in. Right. And then he stood up and worked out, I go, I'm actually right. Okay, so I'm not getting a penalty here? Nah. And then also, the fact that... Like the reserve ref went and got wired up and everything and he came out. Yeah, let's spare a moment for that.
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