33 Questions: Attachment and Identity
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What is the purpose of the 33 Decluttering Questions series and how does week three differ?
Hello and welcome to the Art of Decluttering podcast. I'm your host, Amy Revell. Welcome to week three of 33 Decluttering Questions. The idea is around equipping you with questions that you can ask to help you decide whether something stays or something goes. Every time I've recorded these three episodes, I want to sing like, should it stay or should it go? And then I think, Amy, just don't do that because you'll embarrass yourself. But that's what's going on in my head. I hope it now is like an earworm in your head as well. It's been really helpful, I think, to thinking through questions. So in every episode of the podcast, you'll find that there's questions that we ask. But in order to have it encapsulated within 33 specific decluttering questions, I think is helpful.
You can see all 33 in the show notes today. We've gone through four categories in the episodes leading up today, ranging from what our priorities are, how we think about the future, what our money is and functionality within the home. Today, we're talking about emotional attachment and identity. So the first ones were kind of practical. Then we talked about like mindsets and how we make decisions. And now it's really about the heart. It's really about, so we did head, so we did home and then we did head and now we're doing heart. It is really important that these questions have space to float around for you, that you can have them to ask because sometimes they're questions that you may not even think about until you're working with a professional organizer.
But what I want to do is equip you so that you can ask yourself these questions. If you've gone through all these 33 questions and you're like, I'm still overwhelmed or it just feels too much. Like, as I say often, like our services are available to you wherever you are in the world. I provide virtual sessions. I've got a client in London. I've got a client in Michigan. I've got clients around Australia. So wherever you are, I'd love to be able to help you. And if you're in Melbourne, Australia, we've got team on the ground. We can be with you in your home. So let's get started. We're going to talk about emotional attachment first. And this is one that is deep. So you can go as shallow or as deep when you're asking yourself these questions as you like.
The first one is, am I keeping this because I genuinely want it, because I feel guilty letting it go? And that guilt might be self-imposed guilt where you're thinking, well, you should have thought about that more carefully before you bought it or now it's just going to go into landfill and, oh, my goodness, the world doesn't need more landfill and so you've got some environmental concerns. It might be that you can hear a family member in the back of your head being like, Where is that thing? I gave that to you. I intentionally bought that for you. That was special. Why did you get rid of it? Maybe it's just that you just feel guilty. The kids have given you some random present from a Mother's Day stall or from a Father's Day stall.
And you're like, I don't even like it. But you feel guilty getting rid of it. Not because... not because of the item itself, but because of the relationship that you have with the person. And so my reminder to you is that you can keep the item and still love the person and you can get rid of the item and still love the person. So whether you keep it or not is not the defining factor of the relationship you have with someone. The next question is, if the memory could stay without the physical item, would I still want to keep this? If the memory could stay without keeping the physical item, would I still keep the physical item? Now, some of you would say like, yes, but that's not possible because the way that I am triggered, the memories are triggered is because of the actual item.
And so let's get creative. There might be other ways that you can do that. You might have a whole dinner set that reminds you of your mother-in-law. And I'm talking about a client situation that happened about 10 years ago.
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