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Chapter 1: What is the significance of President Trump's State of the Union address?
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Chapter 2: How do the hosts prepare for the State of the Union coverage?
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Chapter 3: What predictions do the hosts make about the speech's impact?
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By the time this is over, Andrew Klavan will be dead and Matt Walsh, his beard will be gray and he will have no hair. So, you know, a lot's going to happen in the next few years because that's how long we are slated to be together. Basically, we are now doing the extended director's cut of all three versions of all three movies of Lord of the Rings, because that's what tonight is going to be.
So we have with me, of course, Matt Walsh, who is suffering, and Andrew Klavan, who is likely to suffer with me even more. Somehow Matt begged out of part of the show, which I got to say, that's smooth move. Yeah, I know. I'm also confused as to how Matt is able to pull rank, and I'm stuck here all night with you, Klavan. as we go wall to wall on this coverage. It's a full-scale disaster.
Folks, this is why you should subscribe for this kind of sparkling commentary.
Chapter 4: How do the hosts react to the Democrats' behavior during the address?
So I'll begin with Walsh because I'm going to get my money's worth out of Walsh. He usually speaks in these Friendly Fire episodes. I should get like, I don't know, 15 words out of Walsh in a typical Friendly Fire episode. So we have to get all 15 of them in. before the actual State of the Union address, which is to begin at 9 p.m.
So, Matt Walsh, how pumped are you to be here for yet another State of the Union address? And can we expect your excitement levels to achieve the highest form of excitement, or will your soul leave your body in excitement? How excited are you here?
Well, I don't have a soul to begin with, so it can't leave my body. What I'm excited about is that when you guys come back to talk about and analyze the State Union, I'm going to be fast asleep in bed. I don't know what story I gave them, but I'm just going to actually be asleep. That's the truth of it. Let's just be honest about it.
Look, I mean, you know, I feel the same way you do, Ben, about the State of the Union addresses, that obviously they're mostly pointless, and if there's any kind of movement in the polls, it will last for five seconds and it won't matter anymore. So that's generally the case.
Chapter 5: What are the highlights of Trump's speech regarding immigration?
I do think that... If I were to predict that anything out of this, or if anything makes an impact out of this speech, I would guess it's likely to be less what Trump says in the speech and more the antics of the Democrats. And I guess there's going to be fewer of them in the room now because a lot of them are boycotting, they're doing competing events.
They've got their own competing State of the Union. I saw someone mention on Twitter, it's literally the office. It's like something Michael Scott would do, and that's what they're doing now. I expect that we heard about some of the illegal immigrants that are going to be attending Ilhan Omar and others along with her.
But I expect that the Democrats in the room, they're probably going to get a lot of antics out of that. And so if anything really makes an impact, it's going to be them embarrassing themselves. And I think we're kind of at a point. Look, I mean, the State of the Union has always been pointless. I think we're all on the same page. He should just send an email and be done with it.
But if there was ever a time when you could, when there was any sort of function of the State of the Union, which I guess is supposed to be, you've got both sides that are there and they're kind of unified and we're hearing the vision for the country going forward and there's supposed to be a little show of kind of like unity and togetherness and some decorum and,
I think that's kind of the point of it, the pageantry.
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Chapter 6: How does Trump address economic issues in his speech?
But that's out the window now. We can't do that anymore. Those days are long gone. And so it just makes it all the more like, why are we even still doing this with the State of the Union? We're at a point now where the Democrats cannot even pretend to have any basic respect for the other side at all. They cannot do it. They refuse to do it. And so I imagine they're going to humiliate themselves.
I agree with that. And I think it'll be amusing to see what sort of antics they play. Will there be juggling? Will eggs be hurled? Will they bring illegal immigrants into the chamber that was mentioned by Cabot? I had not heard that. But again, I think it would be fabulous if Tom Homan just started muscling his way through the Democratic caucus with handcuffs and started dragging people away.
Chapter 7: What personal stories does Trump share to connect with the audience?
That would be the best version of this. Matt and I were actually in the room for this last time. And so, again, I'm jealous of Matt that he gets to, you know, go to sleep this evening. Andrew Klavan, I want to get your commentary on this because it will be your last commentary on this earth.
Because while Matt's soul is likely to leave his body out of excitement, yours is likely to leave your body out of, you know, death. But first, I do want to talk to you about the fact that you are still alive. And I feel like one of the reasons you are still alive is because you've been eating your fish. That's why. So I need you to tell me about Wild Alaskan.
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Chapter 8: What conclusions do the hosts draw about the future political landscape?
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I mean, you're allowed to eat fish, right, Ben?
Yes, I am allowed to eat fish. That is the thing that I'm allowed to eat. But honestly, the person in my office, because of kosher reasons, who has been enjoying the fish is producer Phil, who's looking fit as a fiddle and ready for love, as they say. Well, apparently it is sustainably sourced, wild caught from Alaska.
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Yes, Ben. That's correct. I also enjoy fishing. It's one of my favorite things to do. And when I like to catch fish, but I can catch fish, but I prefer to have them sent to me. It's a lot easier that way. And I don't have to prepare it either.
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Okay, so, Andrew, I was calling on you, and then I immediately shifted into the way that we make money, of course, which is our ads.
So I'm going to throw it back to you because as the hours tick down on your life and you realize that you're going to have to spend the next several hours with me listening to an interminable address interrupted 1,273 times by applause, what are your last thoughts on this earth?
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