The Connected Life
Episodes
372: The Fantasy of Fixing People Pt. 3
16 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us don't set out to control people—we think we're helping. We say it's love, protection, or just wanting the best. But underneath, codepende...
371: The Savior Complex Trap Pt. 2
09 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
So many of us grow up believing that love means fixing, managing, or predicting other people. It feels safer to silence our needs than risk being "too...
370: Growing Up Codependent Pt. 1
02 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
So many of us confuse codependency with love—believing that fixing, managing, or rescuing others is the way to feel safe and connected. But what if ...
369: Emotional Immaturity in Relationships Pt.3
26 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us want to be emotionally mature—calm in conflict, clear about our needs, and kind even when we're hurting. But no one really teaches us how...
368: Emotional Maturity: Letting Love In Pt. 2
19 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us say we want to be loved — but for many of us, when it shows up at our doorstep, it stirs up panic, self-doubt, and the urge to run. But w...
367: The Key to Emotional Maturity Pt. 1
12 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us were never taught how to be with uncomfortable emotions—only how to avoid, suppress, or get overwhelmed by them. The unfortunate result i...
366: A Nervous System Reset
05 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us don't realize how disconnected we are from our bodies, our emotions, and the present moment. We live in constant motion, pushing through ex...
365: The One Thing That Changed Our Marriage Pt. 1 - Greatest Hits
29 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We've all been in situations where conflict slowly builds between us and someone else, only to find ourselves acting in ways we're not proud of. Sudde...
364: There's Hope for Your Relationship - Greatest Hits
22 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us don't realize how much of our relationship pain is rooted in old stories—until those stories start playing out with the person we love mo...
363: Love that never fails - Greatest Hits
15 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this heartfelt episode, Justin and Abi discuss the profound impact grief and suffering have on humanity, exploring how the radical love of God can ...
362: Bouncing Back from Betrayal - Greatest Hits
08 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Betrayal cuts deep—not just because of the actions themselves, but because of what they shake inside of us. We choose to trust, to be vulnerable, to...
361: Why You Push Love Away - Greatest Hits
01 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We've all experienced those people that seem hot one minute and cold the next. Their mixed signals keep us wondering if they want to be besties or sec...
360: A Guide to Expressing Your Emotions - Greatest Hits
24 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us were never taught how to feel emotions—let alone how to express them in a way that feels safe for us and the people we love. From famil...
359: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 1 - Greatest Hits
17 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us were never taught how to share pain in a way that brings connection. We were taught to explode, shut down, or stay silent—and those patte...
358: Toxic Empathy Vs Healthy Empathy - Greatest Hits
10 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Empathy can be one of the most destructive forces to connection—or one of the most powerful. Without it, relationships become cold and judgmental. B...
357: What to Do When Your Partner Won't Change - Greatest Hits
03 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Nothing is more frustrating than feeling stuck in a relationship where your partner refuses to change. Maybe you've had the same conversation a hundre...
356: When Intuition Opens the Door
27 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Following your intuition can feel confusing. Sometimes it sounds like fear, sometimes like desire, and sometimes like silence when you need it most. B...
355: How I Started Trusting Good Things
20 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We've all felt it—the pit in your stomach that says the good can't last, or the ache that whispers the pain will never end. Living braced for impact...
354: What Chronic Sickness is REALLY Like
13 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Chronic sickness can make you feel like you've lost yourself and that you're letting everyone else down too. It impacts more than just your body; it r...
353: The Key to Relational Resilience
06 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Shame is one of the most powerful forces in relationships and one of the least recognized. It hides behind defensiveness, blame, denial, and emotional...
352: The Expectation Hangover
29 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Whether it's a birthday, anniversary, holiday, or vacation—we often attach so much meaning and pressure to these moments that they end up feeling mo...
351: The Missing Piece to Trauma Healing
22 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Many of us can talk logically about our feelings and for years replay the same stories in an effort to make sense of the pain, yet never truly finding...
350: Is Therapy a Scam?
15 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In a modern world with more access to therapy than ever before, the increase in emotional health seems to be accompanied by people who are more fragil...
349: Is Emotional Health Your Religion?
08 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Justin and Abi explore how emotional health, once rooted in compassion, can begin to mirror the rigid structures of religion. They un...
348: How to Get What You Want
01 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most relationship conflict isn't about the issue at hand—it's about whose anxiety gets cared for. Whether it's parenting, money, cleaning, or how of...
347: Why Success Nearly Broke Me
25 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
When life feels overwhelming, it's easy to reach for anything that helps us escape. For some, it's alcohol or substances. For others, it's overworking...
346: When to Walk Away
18 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Some relationships help you grow—and some slowly pull you away from who you really are. So how do you know when it's time to walk away? In this epis...
345: When to Lock it Down
11 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Choosing who to commit to isn't just about attraction or chemistry—it's about alignment in values, emotional health, and the ability to grow togethe...
344: The Cure to Relationship Drama
04 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us think we're being observant when we're really just making snap judgments. Our brains are designed to make quick assumptions—to keep us sa...
343: Become a Badass at Dating Pt. 2
28 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Falling for someone is easy. But building something that actually lasts? That takes a whole different skill set. In part two of this series, Justin an...
342: Become a Badass at Dating Pt. 1
21 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Many of us didn't grow up learning how to date in a world of endless options and quick rejections, and those of us who have don't know a life without ...
341: Staying Connected When Life Gets Stressful
14 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We all hit seasons where life feels too big to carry—and often, our relationships take the hit. Stress doesn't just affect our schedules; it hijacks...
340: The Courage to Rethink Your Faith Pt. 2
07 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Ever felt like asking hard questions about your faith might cost you everything? Like belonging, respect, or the relationships you once felt safest in...
339: The Courage to Rethink Your Faith Pt. 1
30 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
At some point, many of us reach a moment when our beliefs no longer fit the reality we're living. In this episode, Justin and Abi open up about their ...
338: Hormones: The Relationship Plot Twist
23 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For many couples, navigating hormones can feel like walking through a minefield—unpredictable, emotionally charged, and often misunderstood. In this...
337: Boundaries in Romance Pt. 2
16 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Setting boundaries can sound easy in theory. But trying to implement boundaries when your nervous system is fried and you're knee-deep in a conversati...
336: Boundaries in Romance Pt. 1
09 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For many of us, setting boundaries sounds reasonable outside of a romantic relationship. But what happens once you're in deep—sharing a life, a home...
335: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 2
02 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us never learned how to share pain in a way that brings us closer. Instead, we vent, shut down, accuse, or spiral into fear—hoping to feel u...
334: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 1
26 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us were never taught how to share pain in a way that brings connection. We were taught to explode, shut down, or stay silent—and those patte...
333: Toxic Empathy Vs Healthy Empathy
19 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Empathy can be one of the most destructive forces to connection—or one of the most powerful. Without it, relationships become cold and judgmental. B...
332: Why You Push Love Away
12 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We've all experienced those people that seem hot one minute and cold the next. Their mixed signals keep us wondering if they want to be besties or sec...
331: There's Hope for Your Relationship
05 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us don't realize how much of our relationship pain is rooted in old stories—until those stories start playing out with the person we love mo...
330: A Guide to Expressing Your Emotions
28 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us were never taught how to feel emotions—let alone how to express them in a way that feels safe for us and the people we love. From family ...
329: What's Shaping Your Sex Life?
21 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most of us were never taught to explore where our beliefs about sex came from—let alone how those beliefs affect our experience of it. From purity c...
328: Fire Up Your Sex Life
14 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Let's be real—most of us didn't get great sex ed growing up, and even fewer of us learned how emotional pain, shame, and past beliefs impact our sex...
327: The Magic of "Now"
07 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
So many of us feel like we're just going through the motions of life—rushing through tasks, ignoring our bodies, and avoiding the feelings that seem...
326: Opening Your Heart After Loss
31 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Many of us have experienced moments of life that seem to unravel faster than we can hold them together. The crushing weight of our problems and pain c...
325: A Secret to Fueling Attraction
24 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Attraction isn't just physical—it's deeply emotional. When couples struggle with intimacy, it's often because unprocessed pain has created invisible...
324: What to Do When Your Partner Won't Change
17 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Nothing is more frustrating than feeling stuck in a relationship where your partner refuses to change. Maybe you've had the same conversation a hundre...
323: Bouncing Back from Betrayal
10 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Betrayal cuts deep—not just because of the actions themselves, but because of what they shake inside of us. We choose to trust, to be vulnerable, to...
322: Church Hurt: Rage, Grace, & Everything in Between
03 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For many, the church has been a place of deep wounding rather than healing. Whether you've personally experienced pain or watched destructive behavior...
321: The Silent Killer of a Great Life
24 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Denial is one of the biggest roadblocks to living a full and abundant life—but most of us don't even realize when it's at play. It's not always inte...
320: Green Flags—What to Look For in Relationships
17 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Red flags get all the attention—but what about the green flags? We're so quick to call out what to avoid, but do we actually know what to look for i...
319: Bridging Faith and Emotional Health Pt. 2
10 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Many have experienced a version of faith that prioritizes performance over authenticity, often leaving little room for emotional honesty or personal h...
318: Why We Compromise What We Want
03 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We've all had something we've wanted and found ourselves so desperate to obtain it, that we find ourselves compromising out of FOMO. In our anxiety, t...
317: Bridging Faith and Emotional Health Pt. 1
27 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For many, institutionalized faith and emotional health often feel like two opposing worlds. This separation between spirituality and emotional intelli...
316: Creating the Life You Want
20 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Life can often feel like it's happening to us. We can feel powerless to partners, children, friends, employers, and endless circumstances. We can choo...
315: The Essential Ingredient for Growth
13 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's easy to feel stuck, endlessly looping through the same life cycles, and spinning our wheels. It can seem like we're barely making progress, leavi...
314: Reclaiming Your Power
06 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
At some point, we've all felt like life is happening to us. Losses, betrayals, misunderstandings, and unexpected challenges can leave behind pain and ...
313: Stop the Resolutions and Start the Transformation
30 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
For many, New Year's resolutions are a pact to change areas of our lives, hoping that those changes will make us more worthy and lovable. Pushing ours...
312: Love That Never Fails
23 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this heartfelt episode, Justin and Abi discuss the profound impact grief and suffering have on humanity, exploring how the radical love of God can ...
311: Hope for Chronic Pain and Sickness
16 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Chronic physical pain and illness have left many of us searching for answers, forced to navigate life with limiting circumstances. The experience can ...
310: Is Your Body Hijacking You
09 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We've all had times where we feel like we've been hijacked and our actions don't line up with our values. Many of us have reactions to circumstances t...
309: Relating to Humans 101
02 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever dread talking to that "one person" at a social event? We've all been there. And, unknowingly, we've probably been that person at some poin...
308: Body Based Healing
25 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Few people imagine that their bodies play an instrumental role in the repair process on the journey to emotional wholeness. Most people see the body a...
307: Becoming Your Greatest Advocate
18 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The secret to creating a fulfilled life often seems like a mystery everyone is searching for. We travel down countless paths, hoping to find something...
306: The One Thing That Changed Our Marriage Pt. 2
11 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In part two of this powerful series, Abi and Justin unpack what it truly means to feel regulated—and why it matters in every relationship. Discover ...
305: The One Thing That Changed Our Marriage Pt. 1
04 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We've all been in situations where conflict slowly builds between us and someone else, only to find ourselves acting in ways we're not proud of. Sudde...
304: Honoring Your Capacity
28 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We're wired to seek love, approval, and affirmation—even when it pushes us to the breaking point. But what happens when life knocks you down so hard...
303: Creating Relational Safety Pt. 2
21 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In Part 2 of this series, Justin and Abi are once again joined by Johnny and Pietze for an in-depth look at secure functioning and the power of collab...
302: Creating Relational Safety Pt. 1
14 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Creating a secure, lasting partnership with someone we love is A LOT of work! It can be especially difficult when we don't have a roadmap. But don't l...
301: Boundaries with Kids
07 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The battle between parents and their children is real! In many homes, parents either feel overrun by their kids, or they rule with an iron fist. But w...
300: Just Do the Next Right Thing
30 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It's common for people to ask, "What am I doing with my life?" There's a natural curiosity within us that seeks to understand our purpose on earth. Th...
299: Great Minds Don't Think Alike
23 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
You probably know or have met someone with ADD, ADHD, or autism—or maybe you're one of those people. These neurological differences, known as neurod...
298: Loving the Fantasy of Someone
16 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It's easy to fall in love with the idea of someone. The fantasy we create in our minds is often one of very few imperfections. Unfortunately, the perf...
297: It Begins with Boundaries Pt. 2
09 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In part two of this dialogue, Abi and Justin are once again joined by Habit Coach Jenna Zint to discuss the vital role boundaries play in fostering he...
296: It Begins with Boundaries Pt. 1
02 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Boundaries has been a buzz word for a while now. As with any popularized emotional health tool, there have been wild misuses and misunderstandings of ...
295: The Compassion Cure
26 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you want to know a vital key to making your life better? It's probably not what you think it is. Most of us believe that judging ourselves and othe...
294: How to Win at Marriage
19 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Nobody that's been married will deny that it's difficult. When we get together with another person, we're faced with communication breakdowns, differe...
293: The Power of Facing Yourself
12 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We all impact the world around us for better and for worse. It can feel difficult to take an honest look at ourselves and how we affect others, but wh...
292: Revolutionize Your Relationships with Honesty
05 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Conflict isn't fun for most of us. For many of us, we'd rather avoid it altogether. Since many of us haven't seen it modeled well, it can often lead t...
291: I Hate These Emotions!
29 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Whether or not we're aware of it, we all have emotions we don't want to feel. Some of those emotions are so intolerable that we'll do anything we can ...
290: Restoring the Masculine Soul
22 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In today's culture, masculinity has two predominant expressions on opposite ends of the spectrum. One expression is the dominant protector that views ...
289: Create Healthy Connection with Your Emotions
15 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Emotions are an inescapable part of the human experience. As kids, these emotions are often judged, shut down, ignored, and stuffed until they can't b...
288: Reparenting: Healing and Growing as Adults
08 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
As adults, most of us can reflect on our childhood and recognize that there are things we needed from our parents that they couldn't provide. Some cho...
287: Identify Your Trauma Response Pt. 2
01 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In an ever growing culture of emotionally fragile people, it's vital that we have conversations about the human condition in a way that's educational ...
286: Identify Your Trauma Response Pt. 1
24 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We're often quick to believe that messy and destructive actions stem from poor character. Our judgments of ourselves and others usually lack curiosity...
285: How Masculinity Affects All of Us with Danny Silk
17 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The mandate on masculinity is to protect, provide, and connect. However, modern culture has slowly deviated from the path to becoming a man, creating ...
284: The Fantasy of Fulfillment
10 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
An idea etched into the minds of many of us is that finding the right person will make us complete. From a young age, entertainment, religious traditi...
283: Marriage: What We Wish We had Known
03 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Marriage is not for the faint of heart. As two become one, it can feel more like two worlds colliding in unforeseen, catastrophic ways. Without health...
282: Developing a Healthy Sense of Self
27 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We're all looking for acceptance, love, and connection. It's no surprise that for many of us, it's easy to suppress our opinions, beliefs, and desires...
281: Creating Stability in Uncertainty
20 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
There is very little in life we can be totally certain of. The certainty we do have is often an illusion, much like control. When that illusion is sha...
280: Making Peace with the Dead
13 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It's easy to bury the past, and the dead, in our hearts, but left unprocessed things can start rotting. The loss of those we loved, reviled, and were ...
279: Believing in a Good God in Trying Times Pt. 2 of 2
06 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In the messiness of humanity there is a world of pain and suffering all around us that we can't deny. For some of us, reconciling that there's a good ...
278: The Healing Impact of Reflecting on a Loving God Pt. 1 of 2
29 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In part one of this deeply emotional and impactful two-part series, Justin and his best friend Marcus share stories of a radically loving God. Reflect...
277: Steps to Conquering Codependency
22 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Creating connected relationships where we feel like we're authentic and thriving can seem difficult for many of us. Underlying issues that we don't un...
276: Navigating Relational Losses
15 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We've all lost relationships at some point in our lives. Whether we created the disconnection, they did, or we both played a role, those losses can be...
275: Identifying and Overcoming Spiritual OCD
08 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
For many of us, our beliefs around spirituality and faith can lead us to heightened levels of anxiety and mental torment, without even realizing it. O...
274: Attachment - A Guide to Human Connection Pt. 2
01 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Connection is tricky. For some, distance in a relationship seems terrifying, leaving us feeling abandoned and alone. For others, a consistent sense of...
273: Attachment - A Guide to Human Connection Pt. 1
25 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Creating functional and healthy relationships can feel like a mystery. It's easy to believe we're broken and don't do connection well. But what if und...