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The Couples Therapist Couch

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Episodes

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085: The 5 Stages of Relationships with Leanne Clarkson

07 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode Leanne Clarkson talks about the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy which was created by Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson. This is one...

084: Men and Masculinity with Joseph Losi

30 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

There are very different ways that men and women are socialized in our culture. Often, this reality is unspoken and creates challenges for relationshi...

083: Keeping it Real with Couples with Jasmine Foulkes

23 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, Jasmine Foulkes talks about her journey in becoming a therapist and what has been helpful for her in her work with couples. She has a...

082: Wendy Behary on Working with Narcissism

16 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

When working with clients in therapy I often wonder if someone might be displaying aspects of narcissism. I often question myself and my reality. It i...

081: Healing from Heartbreak with Chautè Thompson

09 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

    For many people, one of the most difficult times in their life can be going through a breakup or divorce or experiencing some other brokenness i...

080: Lori Gottlieb on Normalizing the Human Experience

02 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

So often, the individuals and couples we see in therapy feel alone in their experiences. As therapists, art of what we can to for them, is make them a...

079: EFT and Attachment Injuries with Leanne Campbell and David Fairweather

26 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We have had a few episodes about emotionally focused therapy (EFT) lately and for good reason. EFT is one of the most well respected and widely used m...

078: Stan Tatkin on Understanding Your Partner's Brain

19 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

After years of studying couples, neuroscience, and attachment, Dr. Stan Tatkin knows what is necessary for a deep, enduring relationship. In this epis...

077: EFT and Trauma with Kathryn Rheem

12 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It is becoming more and more evident over time that incorporating aspects of trauma work into couples therapy is incredibly beneficial. Using Emotiona...

076: Couples Retreats with Rachel Zamore

05 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Couples retreats and intensives are getting more and more popular and for good reason. It is a very good way of making a lot of progress in a short am...

075: Using Mindfulness in Couples Therapy with Rob Fisher

19 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

When working with couples in therapy, it can be easy to get lost in their story and stay focused on the content of what they are talking about. This o...

074: Lisa Ferentz on How Trauma Impacts Adult Relationships

12 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode Shane interview Lisa Ferentz, who is an expert on trauma and has trained and educated hundreds of therapists on how to work with traum...

073: Navigating Stepfamily Situations with Karen Bonnell

05 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Bringing two families together can be one of the most difficult things for couples to deal with. Whether both partners have children, or one partner h...

072: Psychodrama with Couples with Walter Logeman

29 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Using psychodrama in therapy has the capability to help people unlock neural pathways in ways that they wouldn't otherwise be able to with typical tal...

071: Hedy Schleifer on Creating Transformation in Couples Therapy

22 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, Hedy Schleifer and Shane go deeper into the ideas created by Hedy in her method of working with couple...

070: Bill Doherty on Marital Commitment vs. Individual Happiness

20 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Never before in history has there been such a movement towards individual happiness. For a long time people have had a strong sense of commitment to t...

069: Tammy Nelson on Sex and Couples Therapy

13 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode with the amazing Couples and Sex Therapist, Dr. Tammy Nelson, we talk about the importance of therapists being comfortable with talkin...

068: Emotionally Focused Therapy Training with Jill Fischer

06 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This episode is with Jill Fischer who is a leading Emotionally Focused supervisor and trainer. She provides listeners with a fantastic overview of EFT...

067: Rebecca Jorgensen on EFT and Therapist Development

30 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

When couples come for therapy they are usually aware of anger, frustration, and lack of connection. As humans we are very good at figuring out who to ...

066: Allison Puryear on Building a Fantastic Couples Therapy Practice

23 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As therapists we get lots of training and do an amazing job of serving our clients in therapy. What most of us don't learn and need help on is how to ...

065: Connectfulness with Rebecca Wong

16 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

For so many of us we don't have a strong sense of what we want in our lives. We spend a lot of time doing what we think will make us happy or what we ...

064: Black Belt Husband with Quentin Hafner

09 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Because of the way that men and women are socialized differently, there are particular challenges that men face when it comes to relationships. For th...

063: A Couple Educating Couples with Dr. Jameson and Herdyne Mercier

02 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Often people try to please their partner and lose sight of what they want for themselves. It is important that we speak up for what we want in our rel...

062: The 5 Core Issues from Pia Mellody and RLT with Kim Ploussard

18 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Babies aren't born with the ability to have a healthy self-esteem and good boundaries with others. As humans, we learn these things from our parents, ...

061: EFT vs. RLT Debate with Figs O'Sullivan

11 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, Emotionally Focused Therapist, Figs O'Sullivan, conceptualizes a case from the standpoint of working from the EFT perspective. Relati...

060: Relationships 101 with Signe Simon and Simone Humphrey

04 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In the last few decades there has been an amazing amount of progress and movement towards freedom for individuals in many societies. While this freedo...

059: Emotionally Focused Family Therapy with Gail Palmer

28 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As couples therapists, most of use have heard of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), but the same foundations of this model are being used more and mor...

058: The Five Losing Strategies in Relationships with Shane Birkel

21 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Get your free copy of The Comparison of 7 different Models of Couples Therapy. This report compares Emotionally Focused Therapy, Relational Life Thera...

057: Tiffany McLain on The Money Mindset for Therapists

14 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As children, we grow up with money messages that we don't even realize are being implanted in us. We often have a hard time knowing how to explore or ...

056: Gottman and Infidelity with Jennifer Lagrotte

07 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

There is so much to consider when working with couples after an affair. The partner who feels betrayed is having a traumatic experience. They feel lik...

055: Attachment vs. Differentiation Debate with Nathan Hardy and Adam Fisher

31 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This conversation explores the debate between differentiation and attachment. This episode is with the authors of an article entitled Attachment vs. D...

054: Love Worth Making with Stephen Snyder

24 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As Couples Therapists we know that most people just don't talk about sex. Because of this, when people face sexual issues it can feel overwhelming, an...

053: Money Conversations and Couples with Kiné Corder

17 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

When couples come to us with issues related to money they often feel completely stuck. One partner might want to save for the future and one partner m...

052: Harville Hendrix on Imago Couples Therapy

10 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This episode explores fundamental questions like why do we fall in love, why do couples fight and how can couples work through conflict? Harville Hend...

051: How to Have an Amazing First Couples Therapy Session with Shane Birkel

03 Jul 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As Couples Therapists we all know that Couples Therapy is much different that Individual Therapy. It is easy to get off track and wrapped up in conten...

050: Ian Kerner on Treating Sexual Issues in Couples Therapy

26 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Some of the most popular episodes on the podcast have been about working with sex in the context of Couples Therapy. There are so many dimensions to e...

049: Ellyn Bader on The Developmental Model of Couples Therapy

19 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This episode is packed full with advice for how to do good couples therapy. Some of the topics covered are the 6 types of confrontation, rethinking 1s...

048: Kinky Folks and Non-Traditional Couples with Heather Garner

12 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As therapists there is a lot we can do to make people feel more comfortable and safe to open up. Doing our own work to challenge biases is an importan...

047: George Faller on Pursuers and Withdrawers in EFT

05 Jun 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Many couples fall into a predictable dance that neither one of them want to be in. They end up being stuck in this pattern and can't seem to free them...

046: Millennials and Gen Zs in Love with Shadeen Francis

29 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Expectations for relationships are changing faster than ever. What was considered "normal" for our grandparent's generation is being challenged and ev...

045: Multi-Heritage Couples with Melvin Escobar

22 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

When we assume that someone is right and someone is wrong, we are already setting ourselves up to be frustrated in the conversation. Instead of provin...

044: Building an Online Presence through Social Media with Dr. Julie Hanks

15 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Most therapists don't like the idea of being in front of dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of others. We feel right at home with one or two people i...

043: Beyond Mars and Venus with John Gray

08 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

50 years ago men and women were more likely to know what each of their different roles were and feel competent to fulfill their partner in the relatio...

042: Katherine Woodward Thomas on Conscious Uncoupling

01 May 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Going through a break up, separation or divorce is one of the most difficult things people ever have to face. In this episode, Katherine Woodward Thom...

041: Alexandra Katehakis on Sex Addiction and Healthy Sex

24 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

When looking at sexual betrayal, many people in our society simplify it down to the fact that the betrayer is bad, wrong, and should be cut off. This ...

040: Polyamorous Relationships with Jonathan Burstein

17 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

There are more and more people who might be defined as sexual minorities and it is as important as ever for therapists to be educated and sensitive al...

039: Lynn Grodzki on Building Your Private Practice

10 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In grad school we learn all the essentials to become a great therapist. Unfortunately, most therapists come out of that experience lacking any sort of...

038: Terry Real on Relational Life Therapy

03 Apr 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Traditional therapy has done a great job of providing clients with a warm, loving, compassionate environment to heal. Unfortunately, it falls short wh...

037: Janis Abrahms Spring on Healing After an Affair

27 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

How do unfaithful partners typically respond differently than hurt partners after an affair? What constitutes an affair - intercourse? Instant messagi...

036: Co-Parenting through Divorce with Karen Bonnell

20 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Some of the most challenging couples we see in Couples Therapy are those who are no longer even in a relationship. When children are involved, it is n...

035: Stan Tatkin on A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy

13 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Stan Tatkin says that being a Couples Therapist is like being a good Jazz Musician. With a jazz performance, the musicians follow the flow and play in...

034: 10 Ways to Make More Money in Your Private Practice

08 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This is the 6th edition of the bonus business episodes that are released the first (or second) Thursday of each month. This is a solo episode with Sha...

033: EFT and Attachment with Anabelle Bugatti

06 Mar 2018

Contributed by Lukas

People often have a hard time feeling heard and understood, especially in their relationships. In this episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, Anabell...

032: How Parenthood Impacts Relationships with Elly Taylor

27 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In our society, we do a terrible job of preparing new parents for what is to come in their relationship with each other. 92% of parents report increas...

031: Premarital Counseling with Mayi Dixon

20 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As couples therapists we know how important a good foundation is. Educating couples about relationship skills right from the beginning can set them up...

030: Helping Couples Cope After Infidelity with Terri DiMatteo

13 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Everyone knows someone who has been impacted by infidelity. It is such a prevalent reality in our society, yet there is still so much taboo and limite...

029: Love Your Paperwork with Maelisa Hall

08 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

*Bonus business episode. We all have trauma from being in school and getting a big red X on a paper. When people mention the word paperwork it can def...

028: Exploring EFT with Jim Thomas

06 Feb 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) is one of the most well regarded models being used by couples therapists today. In this episode Jim Thomas o...

027: Harriet Lerner on Apologizing

30 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

A meaningful apology can transform a relationship. A lackluster apology can just as easily lead to major problems in people's ability to connect.  Fo...

026: Less Conflict, More Connection with Figs O'Sullivan

23 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

All couples get stuck in emotional interactions and patterns that lead to them feeling hurt and wanting to be loved at the same time. It can feel very...

025: Love is a Verb with Bill O'Hanlon

16 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

When we think about problems in our relationships we often want to place blame on our partner and attack their character. When this happens it makes p...

024: Couples and Autism with Janeen Herskovitz

09 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

There are specific things for therapists to think about when working with a couple who has been impacted by autism. It could be a child of the couple ...

023: Ernesto Segismundo on Creativity, Video, and Social Media

04 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

As therapists, we have so much to offer people, but we are often afraid. Whether it is a case of imposter syndrome or just getting stuck in the day to...

022: Gay Couples with Alapaki Yee and Salvatore Garanzini

02 Jan 2018

Contributed by Lukas

In the field of Couples Therapy there has been very little research on gay couples. Fortunately, more and more is being done all of the time. It is im...

021: True Love is not True: Relationships Take Work

26 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This is the first solo episode on the Couples Therapist Couch. Shane Birkel talks about how love changes over time and normalizes how different it mig...

020: How to Ask About Sex in Couples Therapy with Martha Kauppi

19 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Most Couples Therapists understand the importance of bringing sex into the conversation in couples therapy. Unfortunately, most feel unprepared to kno...

019: Hedy Schleifer on Encounter-centered Couples Therapy

12 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Hedy Schleifer has developed an deep and rich model of working with couples based on her decades of experience as a couples therapist as well as using...

018: Amber Hawley on Building Your Business Community

07 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

This is the third Bonus Business episode in a series that is release the first Thursday of each month. Being in Private Practice can be lonely and the...

017: Using Gottman Interventions to Enhance Intimacy with Laura Heck

05 Dec 2017

Contributed by Lukas

In order to guide couples to greater intimacy it can be helpful to have a framework that is backed up by decades of research. Laura Heck talks with Sh...

016: Joy Harden Bradford on Being Open to the Conversation of Privilege

28 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Lately in our country it seems like race and privilege are at the forefront of the media. From police shootings, to Donald Trump, to kneeling during t...

015: Lori Gottlieb on Writing to Help Relationships

21 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

In therapy we participate in the conversation with people as they explore the potential for their lives. As a masterful therapist, Lori Gottlieb knows...

014: Addiction and Couples Therapy with Bob Navarra

14 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Addiction and substance abuse are significant issues that affect a huge number of relationships. Unfortunately, many therapists feel incompetent to wo...

013: Law Enforcement Couples with Cyndi Doyle

07 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

When working with couples where one partner is a first responder there are specific issues to be aware of that can help make the work in therapy much ...

012: Building an Instagram Following with Silvy Khoucasian

02 Nov 2017

Contributed by Lukas

There is a growing movement of therapists who are using various social media platforms to connect with the people who need them. In this incredible in...

011: Pragmatic/Experiential Therapy for Couples with Brent Atkinson

31 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

When we think about relationships, we often minimize how much work it takes to maintain the happy, healthy connection with our partner. We often feel ...

010: Parenting Issues in Couples Therapy with Mallory Grimste

24 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

One of the main issues that couples bring up in therapy is disagreements about parenting. The way people parent is often related to the way they were ...

009: Clay Cockrell Talking Online Counseling with Couples

17 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

When it comes to doing online counseling a lot of therapists feel overwhelmed by everything there is to consider. On this episode, Clay Cockrell does ...

008: Nazanin Moali on Sex in Couples Therapy

10 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Sex is such an important part of couple relationships and comes up all the time in our work. Dr. Nazanin Moali gives couples therapists tons of insigh...

007: Joe Sanok on Building a Successful Private Practice

05 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

When it comes to making money in private practice, Joe Sanok is on the forefront of leading therapists to reach their potential. In this episode he ta...

006: Acceptance in Couples Therapy with Andrew Christensen

03 Oct 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Integrative Behavioral Couples Therapy is the model that Andrew Christensen developed for working with couples along with Neil Jacobson. In his extens...

005: Race and Privilege with Mercedes Samudio

26 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, Shane interviews Mercedes Samudio about race and privilege both in society as a whole as well as how i...

004: Discernment Counseling with Rachel Zamore

19 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Sometimes couples aren't sure whether they are ready to work on their relationship or not. When this happens it isn't appropriate to do traditional co...

003: State-dependent Couples Therapy with Kerry Lusignan

12 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to the third episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, a podcast by couples therapist, Shane Birkel. This is the podcast for Couples Therapists,...

002: Bringing Couples Closer with Mark Moses

12 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to the second episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, a podcast by couples therapist, Shane Birkel. This is the podcast for Couples Therapists...

001: The Art of Couples Therapy with Margaret Thompson

12 Sep 2017

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to the first episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, a podcast by couples therapist, Shane Birkel. This is the podcast for Couples Therapists,...

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