The Daily Dad
Episodes
This Is the Secret to Your Hardest Job
30 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It doesn’t matter if you’re the president, a doctor, or an internationally touring musician—they all agree that the hardest job is being a pare...
There Is No Party Line
29 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Should you let your kids have screen time when they’re younger? How young is too young to give them their first phone? What about sugar and process...
Make Life More Promising When You’re Around
28 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"F. Scott Fitzgerald lived a glamorous life and then he cracked up. All his talent. All his money. All the beauty and the passion evaporated. His wife...
It’s Hard to Be Them
27 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It would be nice if the world was nice. It would be nice if it was easy to be a kid. Unfortunately, it isn’t. It’s hard to be the smart kid. As S...
This Is the Tricky Balance
24 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"School doesn’t matter. It just doesn’t. Have your grades from elementary school ever come up once in your life? Even a Harvard GPA is unnecessary...
Your Bond Should Grow
23 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Every father is different, yet when we hear the descriptions, or see the portrayals of fathers on film, it can feel like we’re the only one who is ...
There Are Better Forms of Motivation
22 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"When you look at champions—in sports or politics or business—it’s hard not to detect a theme running through a lot of their motivations. Many o...
Show Them What You Love (But Don’t Make Them Love It)
21 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"You have been looking forward to this for so long. The opportunity to turn them onto your favorite bands. To watch your favorite movies. To take them...
This Is a Chance to Learn
20 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"There is nothing that can prepare you for being a dad, as the cliche goes. No book. No class. No amount of seeing your own parents or siblings do it....
You Gotta Give Them Access
17 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"We want to make sure our kids have opportunities in life. We want to make sure that they’re not excluded or kept out. We work hard—try to make mo...
Try Not to Give Them Anything Extra
16 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"We all have issues. We know that. Our goal as fathers, as we’ve said, is to not pass them on. To stop the cycle of dysfunction. It’s a low bar, t...
Look for the Double Opportunity
15 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"The jogging stroller lets you exercise… while spending time with your kid. The drive to school, or to soccer tournaments… is a chance to have tha...
This Could Be That Day
14 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It was just another day on vacation for the Roosevelts in 1921. FDR spent the morning sailing around Campobello Island with Eleanor and his two older...
You Guys Should Do This Together
13 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Each morning, Hugh Jackman and his wife Deborra-Lee Furness, get up early and, after they meditate, they read together. Actually, they read aloud to ...
Remember the True Value of an Education
10 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"You send them to great schools. You make sure they do their homework. You drill them on their flashcards. You are saving for college. You are not goi...
They Deserve to Be Sheltered (Somewhat!)
09 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"How much should we shelter our kids from the scariness of the world? How much should we protect them from knowing about the day-to-day events of the ...
Don’t Teach Them What to Think, Teach Them How
08 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It’s tempting to tell them exactly what they can and can’t do. It’s tempting to tell them what you expect them to do, or explain how the world ...
You Are Being Reminded
07 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It’s been a rough couple weeks. You watched your retirement accounts lose as much as 30% of their value. You’re watching businesses disappear lef...
See If They Can Understand This
06 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"You probably heard the story of the ugly duckling growing up. Or perhaps you remember the story of Solon and Croesus. Both stories—one about a duck...
Keep Their Life Normal
03 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"We’ve talked before about how children born into privilege or power or a well-known family can easily become spoiled. Marcus Aurelius was an except...
This Is How To Get What You Want
02 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"We’ve talked about so many things in this email over the last year, so many goals we have as parents. We talked about treating fatherhood as a seco...
They Shouldn’t Have To Earn This
01 Jul 2020
Contributed by Lukas
In today's Daily Dad Podcast, Ryan tells the story of a young Lyndon Johnson and how his mother's adulation would turn into something worse, something...
Don’t Force Your Interests On Them
30 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
You had all these ideas about what being a father would be. You looked forward to fixing cars together. Or watching your favorite movies. Or taking th...
You Have to Take Care of Yourself, Too
29 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"We’ve talked before of the crossfire hurricane that is becoming a father. When you first become a dad, your whole life gets turned upside down. As ...
They Are Meant For This
26 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Maybe you remember when your kids were really young—or maybe they still are really young so you know this even better—what you could do to magica...
You Must Give Them This Gift
25 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Theodore Roosevelt lived an incredible life. He was an author. A naturalist. A rancher. A police chief. A cowboy. A hunter. A governor. A soldier. A ...
Seldom Should Be Heard a Discouraging Word
24 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"If you’re not paying attention, it’s easy to slip into a habit of almost invariable negativity: Stop doing that. Don’t touch this. No, you can’...
Be Spartan With Your Wealth
23 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"The emperor Hadrian never had a son so he devised a very specific succession plan. He adopted a fifty-one-year-old man named Antoninus Pius on the co...
What Are Your Rules?
22 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"You’re a parent, so you have rules. What are they? No, not rules for them. Rules for you."Ryan talks about the most important rules that a parent c...
It’s An Honor to Do This
19 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"They say that the reason people have long shaken hands with their right hands was to signal that we came in peace and we’re not dangerous. They say...
Show Them Their Hometown
18 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Maybe you don’t love where you live. Maybe if you had more money or a different job, you’d live elsewhere. Maybe it is too liberal or too conserv...
This Should Be What You Teach Them
17 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"If you haven’t watched the TV series Friday Night Lights since you’ve become a father, you should watch it again. There’s a reason that Coach T...
It’s Wrong to Ignore What You Know Is Wrong
16 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"There is so much on your plate. So much you have to worry about as a parent... So it’s understandable if you’ve been distracted, and you’ve mis...
Here’s How to Tie Your Family Together
15 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"You want them to listen. You want them to respect your rules. You want them to do what they’re supposed to do, the things that will make them succe...
You Are On The Front Lines of This Fight
12 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"One of the most insidious and toxic forces in the world is the belief that some races are naturally better than others, or that one sex is inferior t...
Be A Towering Example
11 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Cato didn’t write any books. He never taught classes. He never gave interviews. He liked to say that he only spoke when he was certain that what he...
Can You Accept You’re Not In Control Anymore?
10 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"The first thing becoming a parent teaches you, as we’ve talked about before, is that idea of “unavoidable reality.” Each new father, David Broo...
This Is How They Will Learn
09 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It was said for all the genius that Socrates possessed, Plato, and Aristotle, and all the sages who learned from him 'derived more benefit from the c...
We Have To Care. We Have To Care.
08 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Ryan discusses an issue that we as fathers cannot ignore, on today's Daily Dad Podcast.***If you enjoyed this week’s podcast, we’d love for you to...
Teach Them to See the Big Picture
05 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Most of us are old enough to remember coming down to find our father at the breakfast table reading the newspaper. It was simply part of the routine,...
This Is the Kind of Coach You Have to Be
04 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"A father is a provider, a protector, a rule-setter, a friend. They are an educator and exemplar. They are also—whether their kids play sports or no...
Teach Them These Four Virtues
02 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Aristotle worshipped them. The Christians and Stoics too. Four simple words. Four essential tenets for living:Courage. Moderation.Justice. Wisdom....
This Is What We Are Fighting For
01 Jun 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Because of the fiery trial of the Civil War and what it came to represent, Abraham Lincoln is, to most of us, a figure of moral guidance. This natura...
This Is How To Teach Them to Be Understanding
29 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"One of the wonderful benefits of reading fiction, studies have begun to show, is that it helps cultivate empathy... It also happens that fiction—th...
A Dad Must Ask For Help
28 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"If your kid was struggling, you’d want them to tell you, right? If they didn’t understand something in class, you’d want them to ask the teache...
Leave It At The Door
27 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"All day at work you experience stress. You witness other people’s stupidity. You are the victim of their moods and emotions. Your phone pings const...
It’s Time To Tap Into Their Energy
26 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"If you talk to any of your friends right now, you’ll hear stress. You’ll hear fear. You’ll hear anger. You’ll hear the fatigue in their voice...
You Have to Let Them Struggle
25 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"No father wants to see their kids suffer. It’s almost more painful for you than it is for them to watch them trip over their words, to scratch thei...
Show Them What’s What and Who’s Who
22 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Richard Feynman’s father took pains to show his son—usually by their photo in the newspaper—who was worthy of respect or not. He didn’t want ...
Don’t Let Them Dislike Themselves
21 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"One of the more vulnerable moments of Pete Buttigieg’s pioneering campaign for president (as a front-running, openly gay man) came in South Carolin...
Here’s How To Calm Your Kids Down
20 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Why are your kids so crazy? Why is everything so stressful? Why aren’t they doing better in school? Better at listening? Better at focusing?"Find o...
Pain Is a Part of Life
19 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Oh how you wish you could make sure they never suffered. Oh how you wish you could have prevented these last couple weeks. You don’t want them to b...
You Have to Face Your Flaws
18 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Each of us picked things up in childhood. Because of how our own parents were. Because of the experiences we had. Because of things we did... or didn...
Books Are Door-Shaped Portals
15 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"A while back, we gave you Kipling’s poem “If.” Well today, you have another job, to read some of Margarita Engle’s poem about books."Listen t...
This Is Something to Be Glad About
14 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It can be hard to express your feelings as a father sometimes. Not so much because men are expected to bottle up their emotions, but because the emot...
What Is Your Anxiety Doing to Them?
13 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"You’re anxious. You’re stressed. You want them to be safe. You worry about what they’re doing when you’re not there. You worry about their fu...
Help Them Become Who They Are
12 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Bruce Springsteen has three children: Evan, Jessica, and Sam. One of them is an Olympic-level equestrian (which can not have been a cheap or easy int...
Don’t Let Your Kids Be Worse
11 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Arthur MacArthur was a vain and conceited man. He was a war hero at age 18 at the Battle of Missionary Ridge. From there he went on to become a colon...
What Legacy Are You Providing?
08 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Harry Truman was not a good businessman. The clothing shop he opened with a friend was a disaster—and he was paying off the debts through his senat...
What Will They Learn From This?
07 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Right now, you and your family are stuck at home. Or you trying to dig yourself out of the wreckage of a situation that wasn’t your fault, that is ...
These Are Also Magical Words
06 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Last week, we talked about some words that become magical when you become a dad. Although “I love you” is always powerful, suddenly, when you hav...
It Feels Good to Get Them Things
05 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Sometimes it can feel like being a dad is just an endless series of errands. It’s the call from the bedroom that they need a glass of water. It’s...
Can You Teach Them to Give It Their All?
04 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"We talked before about Kipling’s poem “If,” which was written as advice for Kipling’s son, John. It’s a beautiful poem about toughness and ...
Show Them What They’ll Get Out Of This
01 May 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Most schools and most parents teach reading all wrong. They bully kids into doing it. They pressure them. They tell them, 'Reading is what smart and ...
These Are Three Wonderful Words
30 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Before you had kids, 'I love you' was that powerful three word phrase. You said it to your future wife or your future husband and you loved hearing i...
You Have to Listen
29 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"...As parents, we tend to do a lot of talking. There are all the things we tell our kids. The things we remind them about. The lessons we try to teac...
Now Is The Time For Wisdom
28 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"It doesn’t matter how old you are or how old your kids are. You have more experience than them. In some cases, that’s a couple decades. In other ...
Lift Them Up, Don’t Hold Them Back
27 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Family is wonderful. None of us would be here, the writer Aaron Thier once put it, if people hadn’t taken care of us when we were small. Somebody b...
This Is the Main Lesson
24 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"There is so much we want to teach our kids—so much that fathers are expected to teach their kids. How to ride a bike. How to swim. How to throw a p...
Character Is Fate. Never Forget That.
23 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"These are challenging, uncertain times, no question. What’s at the root of it? How did we get here? And what can fathers do about it?The answer com...
How Will You Use This Time?
22 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Right now, most of us are stuck with what you might call dead time. We’re trapped indoors. We’re working from home… or not at all. Kids are out...
You Have To Treat Them The Same
21 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
"Does your dog’s gender matter to you? Like have you ever once thought about whether they were capable of this task or that task because of their se...
Never Make Fun Of Them For This
20 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Your kids will do all sorts of ridiculous things. They will trip and fall, and yes, you will sometimes laugh. You will tease them about this and that....
They Must Learn How To Compete
17 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
It wasn’t until many years into his coaching career that Pete Carroll really settled into his philosophy—the system by which he built his teams, a...
You Must Find The Stillness
16 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
This change we’ve made, this decision to become dads—it has uprooted everything. It’s like we were hit, suddenly, with a crossfire hurricane. Th...
Why Don’t You Know?
15 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
By now, you’ve almost certainly lost count of how many questions you’ve been asked by your kids. From the moment they can talk, that’s what fath...
It’s Your Fault They’re This Way
14 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
F. Scott Fitzgerald knew the long term damage of being spoiled rotten. Not only was he a prime and painful example himself—as we’ve written about—...
They Need You To Be Calm
13 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
The world is a scary place right now. Your retirement accounts have taken enormous hits. Events are getting cancelled. Government officials are failin...
What Will You Regret?
10 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
On their deathbeds, fathers think about a lot of things. They think about the world they’re leaving to their sons and daughters. They think about ho...
Teach Them Early, Teach Them Often
09 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Each of us, no matter how old or successful, has things we wish we knew how to do. We wish we could speak another language, or change the oil in our o...
This Makes Us Crazy
08 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Sometimes it’s good to acknowledge our biases. And one of the biggest biases in our lives is our kids. Not just a bias in the sense that we prefer t...
What Do You Never Want Them To Think?
07 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Imagine that you’re gone and able to look down now and see your kids from above. Or imagine that somehow you had magical powers and could see inside...
You Come From A Strong Tradition
06 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
If you’re in your 30s, then your parents raised you through the global financial crisis, SARS, the bursting of the tech bubble, and 9/11. They saw t...
You Have One Job Today
03 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Your job today as a father is to do one thing. It’s to read this poem, which dates back to 1895, and then to think about how to incorporate its less...
What You’re Doing Is Important
02 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
These are strange times to be a father. Fathers have never been expected to do more—around the house, in their children’s lives. This is wonderful...
Imagine What This Is Like For A Kid
01 Apr 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Seeing your own parents now, as an adult, is stressful. There’s a great Ram Dass line that the comedian Pete Holmes has used in relation to his own ...
Here’s The Only Silver Lining
31 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
People are freaked out. Events are cancelled. Schools have been let out. You’re working from home, or, at least, not going out like you used to. Mon...
Tell Them of Cincinnatus
30 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Do you know the story of Cincinnatus? He was a Roman general who had retired to his farm until he was called to rescue his country from an invasion. M...
Your Job Is To Keep Them Safe
27 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
It’s in moments like these—a pandemic or a hurricane or a terrorist attack—that we fathers are thrown back into a more primal role. Yes, there a...
You Have To Help Them Discover This
26 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Almost every talented and successful person can remember their introduction to whatever it was that became their thing. In Mastery, Robert Greene expl...
Nobody Wins in a War of Attrition
25 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
Because you’re in charge, because you’re so much bigger and stronger and smarter, it’s easy to get trapped into a battle of wills with your kids...
If They Don’t Get It From You, Where Will They?
24 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
We know that our kids want to feel good, feel safe, feel loved. We know they want to feel that someone is proud of them, that they’re talented, that...
It Is Always Scary To Do This
23 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
There has never been a father—a good one anyway—that did not at least occasionally look at what was happening around them and question the world t...
You’ll Want Them To Come To You With Problems
20 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
When your kids mess up, what’s your reaction? Do you freak out? Or are you calm? Do you make the situation better...or worse? Can you actually liste...
What Are They Learning From How You Carry Yourself
19 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
From his dad, Bruce Springsteen learned about shame, about broken pride, and struggling with demons that you can’t quite conquer. It’s an all too ...
They Feel Bad Enough Already
18 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
It happened again. Your kid screwed up. They did something stupid—from drawing on the walls to getting caught drinking. They hurt someone or they li...
Give Them Access To This Wisdom
17 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
For thousands of years, humans have been expressing wisdom to each other through fables. Whether it’s Aesop or the Bible or Leonardo da Vinci or Han...
You’d Trade Anything For This, Yet…
16 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
When Kobe Byrant took off in his helicopter from downtown Los Angeles on January 26th, he was a 5 time NBA champion. He was a 2x Finals MVP. He was a ...
The Trade Off Is Worth It
13 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
These kids have changed your life. There are so many things you used to do that you no longer can. Traveling with no notice. Staying out all night. Sl...
If You Feel Upset, Do This
12 Mar 2020
Contributed by Lukas
You’re upset because you just blew it in that meeting. You’re kicking yourself because you meant to get up early and ended up sleeping through you...