Chapter 1: What makes Frank's Red Hot the GOAT of hot sauces?
Folks, I'm getting hungry. And you know my favorite part of any meal, snack, or game day app? That's right. The GOAT, or should I say the greatest of all time, Frank's Red Hot. It's got the perfect blend of flavor and heat that elevates all foods from wings to buffalo chicken dip to even ice cream. That's right. I said ice cream.
And with a roster of flavors from OG to sweet chili, you can put that shit on everything. So make every dish the greatest and eat the GOAT. This is the Dan Levitar Show with the Stugatz Podcast.
Chapter 2: How do the hosts plan to advertise at the stadium?
I want to figure out what planes to fly over the stadium. Help me fly some planes. Interesting way to frame that. Probably airspace is going to be restricted. I want to do some advertising. You don't think you can have just the planes circling around? I think airspace is going to be at a premium and restricted. So you may want to pivot. Maybe one of those buses.
No, you don't think it's funny for our logo with some joke and a banner to be weaving in and out of military planes? You don't think that's funny? No. And I honestly don't even think our logo would fly with Canes fans either. Are we a playoff team now? Probably even more polarizing amongst Canes fans than Donald Trump. In fact, I know that to be the case.
I've at least seen hats supporting him at the games. All right, look. Here we go with this. No, we can get into this because I was being heckled from the bowling alley. Greg and Chris Cody telling me what their friends are saying about how offensive the things I'm doing are. We'll get to that in a second. People are mad at you. I'm a provocateur. I've been doing this for 30 years.
Look, you broke a bottle over my chin 25 years ago because you're mad at me. Don't care. Built the empire around our program. I love it. I went to school there. Did journalism there. Don't care. Don't care who's mad about it. Didn't care about it 25 years ago. Program's been very good to me. I love it. I've always respected it, and I've always told its story well.
Yes, you have always told its story well. I think most Canes fans don't think that you respect it. And I know this from the enormous amount of fanfare that I got for yesterday's segment defending Mario Cristobal. Dan, I think here's where the confusion is. And let me try to explain this as best I can. You're a guy that has historically put on for Miami better than anybody else.
When those Heat teams were going and the entire world was against Miami, you didn't give a single flying F offensively. about who was coming your way, you do not step to this town and talk shit about it. And when there is a team for a school that you went to, a team that reflects this town better than anyone has ever had, You seem to both sides it some.
I know, look, Jeremy, it's great that we have a villain. Billy doing his shit-serving thing, that was cool. But for it to come from somebody that went to the school, who already has got a reputation working against him, people, I think, incorrectly place a lot of the sanctioned stuff on you. You know about that Pell Grant? Yeah. Yeah, you got scooped on it.
Can you say the one word there incorrectly again? No, let's give people, since we're here, okay, since we're here, look, this is a long time in coming.
I have a relationship with the school, the community around the school, speak at its classes, have loved the school, will always love the school, am wildly grateful for all of the opportunities it presented, including the stage right now, because they helped us build this thing with all the things I learned from them and their program. Look, it's been a rough 20 years.
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Chapter 3: Are the Miami Hurricanes a playoff team now?
But for whatever reason... When it comes to the Miami Hurricanes, we give the other side more than we give the pro stuff. I know I am not the only Miami Hurricane fan in this studio. I'm surrounded by them. You're a Miami Hurricane fan. You're a Miami Hurricane fan. These two guys in front of me are a Miami Hurricanes fan.
The only person that's not a Miami Hurricane fan is Jeremy, who reps UCF and Indiana and whoever Miami is playing. That's understandable. And yet, I think it's outsized and has been outsized on this show, giving voice to the dissenting opinions that it's become the opinion. And this is the reality. This is the perception of our show.
The show, outside of me, is largely perceived amongst our community... to be an anti-Miami show. Okay, and so, let me, Jesus, I didn't realize I had to explain this to the audience. Never mind that I had to explain this to you. I didn't think I would have to explain any of this specifically to you. We're doing a show. that has represented our city for 20 years through all of that conflict.
Chapter 4: What controversies surround Dan's comments about the Hurricanes?
And the story starts, okay, just so we remember what our roots are here. Before our radio station existed, I'm fighting in 90s Miami with the incumbent radio station who's killing me for 10 years while using all of my columns that are about race relations and what's going on really at the University of Miami with its players and who they actually are.
As everything that's being reported is gun charges and cocaine and Michael Irvin ran over somebody's foot near the library. For 10 years, that radio station is crushing me and using my columns for content to make themselves radio stars. While I'm coming up to that school as a Cuban Miami through the same Miami crystal ball came up through.
Can you please mention how your parents fled to this country so I can get bingo for freedom? No, I'm going to tell you the entirety of the story. I know you guys know the story, okay? Yes.
And I know you're bored by the story, but I'm going to tell the entirety of the story because of how I feel about this program and because I've been arrested around it and because I got a beer bottle broken over my face. Yeah. No, no, you're going to also tell the story because you're a writer. Tell it. And I'm the one who runs this show.
And in running this show, we've created a wonderful journalistic character that represents the University of Miami artfully and with his heart at all times. And we do a national thing that annoys people plenty with all our Miami since ESPN Deportes. And now, I am happy for everything that's happening around the program.
And I said a word yesterday, reputationally, a word, a single word is what I said to you. That Mario Cristobal, reputationally, is not trusted in the big games. And that set you off. Yeah, because it's just not true. He's 7-0 against top 25 teams, and that is indisputable. Yeah, big games do show up. But what's also not disputable is they've never won the ACC or played in its championship game.
And so the big games are few and far between. And so when you lose to double-digit underdogs, it's not unfair to say that before this recent run, he was reputationally criticized as someone who would not win these games. Poor Singh, none of those games actually close at double digits, but... I hear you. They were a Louisville double-digit favorite.
Right, but the reputation is they don't show up for these games. These are one-score losses. I think that's the part where I think there's confusion about. We talked about that yesterday. All right, it's fine. Here's where I want to get at. I understand what you're doing.
I understand, especially during some lean years, how my character could be grading and how my passion needed to have people to bump up against. When it comes to the Miami Heat, though, that doesn't really When it comes to the Florida Panthers, though, that doesn't really exist.
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Chapter 5: How does the show balance local team support and criticism?
Because why? Is it so outsized that we have to have so many dissenting opinions when this is such a great story for this community and Dan is supposed to be the Miami guy and he actually went to the school? But who disputes any of what you're saying and how is that not being conveyed by the show through you?
How is that not obvious in terms of bursts of great hurricane coverage that they can get not just here but with the own business that you started because you want to do it differently and you want to be over there actually analyzing for two straight hours the guard play? I would guess because they want 100% buy-in on this show.
Look, our show meets a moment when the team is in the championship games, right? People come here from all over the world to hear biased Miami coverage because we are a Miami show. And for whatever reason, when it comes to this program, and it's irrefutable because I have felt it, because I am often alone.
When I am touting the Miami Hurricanes, this show has an outsized representation of dissenting opinions when it comes to this program. And I understand why. And I understand why I, in particular, need a dilution. I don't understand why we need that dilution right now. I have a theory. I have a theory why. Why Dan is ā I think what you're saying makes sense.
And why Dan is like that with the Canes as opposed to not like that when the Heat are in the finals or the Panthers are winning the Stanley Cup. Is it because you actually have a legitimate tie to the school? And maybe you don't want to come off as ā like you want to actually be fair because you legitimately have a tie to the school as opposed to having a ā you never played for the Miami Heat.
Well, thank you, Zazzle. I am attempting, ostensibly, to be fair. Objective is funny because it's an illusion. Now? No, but did you not hear Nick Wright yesterday? Were you guys not listening when Nick Wright did what he did with J, capital J, wherever it is that he accused me of just sort of not being you anymore? Right. Are you just overcompensating? Because you cannot denyā
That it is different when it comes to this program. Mike, I'm simply, to our national and regional audience, I am simply also trying to give voice to whatever other side there is here in the name of fairness while everyone who's listening to this knows I love the school. Right, but you don't do that to the other teams. You don't. When they are in this spot, you don't.
Ask Jeremy how did the Heat feel about... I don't know how the Heat feel. I know as the one person. I'm hearing everything Mike is saying and saying, yes, yes, yes. On the Heat side. Recently. Because this entire show for the last three years has been an anti-Heat show. Recently. It's fair. Look, we're trying to call them a little bit like we see them. I'm not asking for 100% rah-rah homerism.
I don't think that's ever been the case. We've always had someone on the show that is either anti the local team or at least speaks for that section of the audience. I'm just saying, the pro-Miami stuff... is not a majority opinion on this show and hasn't been since probably it started. And that is the perception of the fans. You may feel differently.
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Chapter 6: What is the significance of the upcoming game for the Hurricanes?
Chris, you know what goes great with Smirnoff? Smirnoff! Yes, but I'm really talking about the game day fit. The style's got to match the vibe. Smirnoff! All right, here's the deal. Game day is everything. And that's exactly why your fit has to match the occasion. Smirnoff!
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Plus, one fan will win a Lely Mays one-of-one game day jacket. Wow. The merch will be dropped on select dates from December to January 21, and it's all courtesy of what brand? That's right, Chris. Fans 21 and over can head to Smirnoff Socials to learn how to sign up. And don't forget to grab a bottle of Smirnoff vodka, number 21, at your local retail. Smirnoff. Please drink responsibly. Smirnoff.
Number 21 vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume. The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York. Please do not share with anybody under legal drinking age. Smirnoff. No purchase necessary. Must be legal. U.S. resident, 21 or older. Sweepstake starts 12-15-2025 at 12 a.m. Eastern and ends 1-23-2026 at 11-59-59 p.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website. Don Libetard.
That's not my favorite rejoin. Context needs to be applied. I thought the context was applied. We'd like to rip that out of context. I was going for a thing. And I have a family. You're going to pretend here that you don't love Matthew Kachuk more than you love anybody you've ever loved? I don't love Matthew Kachuk more than my daughter. Stugatz. Now it's pretty damn close.
This is the Don Libetard Show with the Stugatz. Where's Tony? Let's see what Tony's doing. Tony continues to be outside. Did you grab a popsicle? Not journalism. I got it. I got it. Did not grab a popsicle, Dan, but mira que yo resuebo. Okay, I went inside, talked to the nice lady at the front. We're going inside. Let's go.
Oh!
Now we're getting somewhere. All right, so Tony, just walk around. And if you want to interact with anybody, you can. But also, just give us all your football takes as you wander around in there. Just all of them. Okay. All right. We'll start in the NFL. It's a bit of a mix. They've got costumes. They've got certain things going on here, obviously.
Tony, just plow ahead, and if there's anything you want to interact with, you interact.
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Chapter 7: What humorous moments arise during the game show segment?
But in the interim, just give me football analysis, please. Nothing else. Yeah, okay. Here's your big moment, Tony. The Rams. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Rams, I think, like we talked about, could be one of the best teams in the NFL, but they have a weird thing with the Panthers where they just kind of can't figure them out.
I don't know if it's that the Panthers have their number or if Stafford just doesn't like playing in Carolina. I don't know what it is. But now that the Panthers are out of the way, I think the Rams can go on a run. What do we think about this? Bow and arrow? It's a little cow girl situation there. I don't know. There's a lot of costumes here. It's a lot of costumes.
Ben Johnson is probably one of the biggest winners, not only of the weekend, but the entire season. Because when you have somebody who goes interdivision and then all of a sudden can do what he can do. Here, hold this for a second. When somebody can do what he can do, which is basically completely flip the I don't think you're using that right. What? Are you being reprimanded?
You're being reprimanded for just wandering around? No, I was told to not show certain things, which is fine. We're in the costume section, which is perfectly fine. No, what I was going to say was not only do you have the plus of taking away a divisional opponent's best asset, because they told me to be more quiet. There's people actually, patrons of the store, that are looking for stuff.
I don't think that that mask is supposed to go over your eyes. I think you're wearing that wrong.
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Chapter 8: How do the hosts plan to dress for the livestream event?
You look a little like the Hamburglar. What? They have a picture of people over their face. You can't just put that back. Multiple uses. Yeah, you own that now. That's yours. No, I'm not buying this. Yeah, you can't put that back. Somebody else doesn't want to wear that and be smelling your fumes in that. Oh, I can put this back in a second. What are you talking about? That's gross.
Oh, don't do that. People have been wearing that thing for 69 years. We approve it. What do you think? There's rules here? What can't you show? They told me what I can't show. He just said it's a no-holds-barred. I can't show the obvious thing. I can't show the obvious thing. I've been already told by the higher-ups. I didn't confirm nor did I. We did two shows on that a few weeks ago.
You can sell them at a CVS, but you can't show them. I think it's porn. It can't be any sex toy-related things he can't televise. No, no, it is. It is ST-related. It's absolutely ST-related. Why do you do that? Rose told me, hey, you can't do that. So, okay. Do what? All right. Let's keep bringing down the playoffs. Sex toy. Keep giving us your football analysis.
Were you done with Ben Johnson or do you have more? What is that? I have a clown horn. What is that? It's a clown horn. Who likes that? Dan, don't act like you don't know about that. Where does that go? It's $7.99. You became John Madden all of a sudden. That's such a great bit. Sexual John Madden.
Boom.
Okay, so the best thing about Ben Johnson is leaving the Lions in a lurch, going over to Chicago, saying that he hates Matt LaFleur for some oblivious reason. We have no idea why. And then beating him and then giving him the handshake of like, see you later. It's so good the Bears coach does not respect the Packers coach and came close to getting him fired with three brutal questions. Whoa.
I missed that. Because you never see that. Am I wrong or overreacting when I say that's one of the great football collapses of all time in the playoffs? Points-wise, yeah. They were up by 15 in the fourth quarter. Yeah. Paint the picture, Tony. All right. No, no. We're walking through more of a... How do I say it? A bit of more of like 50 Shades of Grey situation on this side.
If you catch my drift, which... Put something on. There's some bunny ears behind you if you want to take those for a walk. All right, one more football take. You have earned one more football take. Be careful. Don't show anybody on camera. That's Rose. Oh, that's just Rose. Okay. Does Rose have any thoughts? Does Rose have any thoughts? She can't be enjoying it in there.
I'm sure she has a few thoughts. 50% off. Dan? Dan? That's a blowout sale. Can I pique your interest? Oh, my God. Give me a couple of those. Blowout. Wait a second. Do you want the crafty witch? Dan's into this section right here. Oh, I got Dan's kit. The wizard kit. Dan, you show up in the wizard kit. You're going to dominate. I should do the live stream dressed as the sexual wizard.
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