Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Welcome to the Big Suey, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there.
That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it. And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar. This episode of the Dan Levitt Art Show is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours. It feels that America is a little unsafe in a number of different places. And Diana Rossini is joining us now and before.
Today, I believe that the most dangerous situation that Diana Rossini found herself in was being hit by a car while she was walking with Mina before a hit on our show. But Diana Rossini is joining us now and she is fresh from having witnessed a robbery. She was in the.
Yes.
Yes. She's in the in the middle of chaos. What happened, Diana? And welcome to the show.
Hi, guys. Yes, I'm in the middle of a danger zone in suburbia, New Jersey. I was not expecting this. So I had to run into Walgreens real quick to just go pick up some whatever the heck I was, some cleaning product. Important. Not important. And I'm just kind of, you know, I have my phone, I'm about to walk in, and this guy comes flying out.
And these two other men behind him are like, that's him, that's him, he's going, he's going. And the man that stole the items got into the Tesla.
uh and sped off and they're like he stole you know i don't know what he stole um i found out later it was razors but at the moment i swear i was gonna say razors everyone's stealing razors why why i don't know like why are the razors held behind the lock and key i don't know
Now, to be fair, I do use my husband's razor all the time because the men razor, the male razors are just better than the women ones. But that's a different story. I don't I guess I do steal it from him, but I don't steal from Walgreens. So anyway, so this is all happening. And by the way, this is like three o'clock at school pickup. So there's just cars everywhere.
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Chapter 2: What robbery incident did Dianna Russini experience?
But that being said, yeah, look, I think it's coming. I don't know for a fact right now that they're making the switch. Obviously, Brian Dable is pretty weird about it on Monday. That is the first time he just got... bizarre in his press conference. And usually that signals they're having conversations behind the scenes. But the time is coming. This offense isn't doing anything.
They can't win a game. Brian Dable, Joe Shainer on the hot seat. It's no secret. So I wouldn't be surprised if they make that switch. The only
The only argument that's being made right now, Dan, which I'm sure you guys have talked about on the show already, is if you're the organization, do you want Jackson Dart's first game to be against a red-hot Chargers team that looks like one of the best right now in football? Or do you want to wait one more week and allow him to start against a Saints team that is just okay, you know?
Dana, it just occurred to me, I think that you're wasting your fame because you would be an incredible accomplice to like crimes. You just have to show up at the tail end of the crimes and everyone forgets that the crime happened and they start asking you questions about football. Razors, who cares?
I think you need to kind of start testing this and just do small scale things like pharmacies and stuff like that, maybe donut shops, whatever. And then you make your way up to like a bank and you have like jewel heists. And then you just show up at the end. You're like, yeah, Diana Rossini is here. Any questions about fantasy or NFL? And then they'll just flock to you and ask you questions.
And then you just kind of split it with the person after.
Yeah, and just talk football, distract the police officers.
Yeah, of course.
Distract security that's at the Walgreens that was running around.
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Chapter 3: What does Dianna think about child drop-off versus pick-up?
That's actually the way that you get away with the crimes is you go into it and you're like, oh, what is this? And you just start touching everything. So then your DNA and your fingerprints are on everything anyways. And they're like, oh, Diana was just touching things.
Like, I'm sorry. I was just here. Exactly right. I didn't know I was just an innocent bystander. I mean, look, this was probably like the biggest thing that happened in my town anyways, like just someone stealing razors from the local Walgreens. But that concept of I call it getting stuck, unfortunately, sometimes answering football questions, but it happens at daycare pickup all the time.
Like there's like these three dads, all three Giants fans too. And I think they wait for me. Like they know my car and their kids are already buckled in. Like there's no reason for them to get out of the car. And they'll see me pull up and then all of a sudden they like have to pick a flower or, you know, pick up a piece of chalk from the sidewalk. You know, they'll so die.
You know, what do you think?
What are their names? Let's call them out right now. Jeff's dad. What are their names? Hey, Jimmy. Mr. Mr. I don't know. Whatever. Sanchez. Stop hanging out. Creep.
Yeah. The daycare pickup, even so, I it's funny we're talking about this because I asked Kevin to switch with me. I'm like, hey, can you do the pickup and I'll do the drop off because usually people are rushing in the morning. Then I don't get stuck helping people with their fantasy lineups. You know, meanwhile, Kev's like, I'll help them. I'll do it like I have great ideas.
I'm like, no one wants to hear from, you know, no one wants to hear your roster, which would be filled with Philadelphia anyways.
What's your move to avoid it? Do you like act like you're on the phone?
No, I'm pretty good about it. Because, I mean, these are the most important people in my life, right? They're like the parents of Mikey and Joey's friends. I'm going to probably have to be around them forever, right? So I have to be kind of nice.
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Chapter 4: Why does Dianna prefer Gatorade from a can?
Diana, before we move on from the good teams category, Colts. Good? Not buying it yet. Where do you stand?
I'm buying it. And I'm buying the cults more than I'm buying Daniel Jones, right? Because I do think it's kind of two separate conversations. I think we're all waiting for Daniel to turn back into a pumpkin. But... You know, you look at the way the team is built right now and set up. He's got protection. He's got a good run game.
Jonathan Taylor is perhaps maybe one of the more underrated running backs right now because he's always injured, so it's like we forgot about him. Then he's out there, and you're like, wow, this guy's Saquon Barkley. And they've got a great defense, and you've got Lou Adarumo as the coordinator there. So, look, maybe Daniel Jones doesn't have to be perfect every game, and that may be okay.
That may be good enough for the Colts, which, guys, I did not see this coming at all. I heard some good things in the summer, but you know how it is. Like everyone thinks everyone's good in August. But, you know, people kept saying to me, like, Daniel can play like he's good, like our defense. And yeah, we'll say, well, we're saying so is that punter who's not doing much.
Put it on the poll, please. Are we all waiting around for Daniel to turn into a pumpkin at Levitard show? All right, kicking things off with Smirnoff, the official vodka sponsor of the NFL and the number one vodka in the world. Chris Cody, you're here. Smirnoff! Wow, you're on the money with Smirnoff.
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Plus, one fan will win a Lely Mays one-of-one game day jacket. Wow. The merch will be dropped on select dates from December to January 21, and it's all courtesy of what brand?
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Chapter 5: What are the latest NFL updates shared by Dianna?
And based on what I'm seeing, put him on offense. Just let him be a receiver and make some things happen. Because when him and Trevor Lawrence are making it work, he can be dynamic.
He can't drop the ball as much as their other receivers do.
Yeah, I don't know what's going on there with that. Look. Maybe they just have the yips. I'm not sure how that works, but that's not good. There's been a lot of drops, though. That's September. Like, everyone's dropping. How many fumbles do the Patriots have? I mean, inside the five-yard line?
That was wild.
That was five turnovers. That was horrendous.
Don Levitard.
Are you on the fan right now? Did Mike Greenberg call you yet? Are you ever going to go back to ESPN? People think it's so weird you're a writer now. All those years on TV, all those years, and now you write? Who reads that?
Stugatz.
Why did you take a job at the Atlantic? Mom, I work at the Athletic. What? You're on YouTube?
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Chapter 6: What are the implications of Jackson Dart starting for the Giants?
He loves watching lions win a fight. He doesn't like lions losing a fight, but he has an algorithm that's filled with lions winning fights. Oh, yeah, lion in the wild, man. If it's chasing down an antelope, and jumping on an antelope and bringing down an animal twice its size and killing it with a bite to the neck in a matter of seconds. Turn on. Woo! Everyone knows Miles. What? Turn on?
Turn on? What? Turn on? Those make me sad. It's the wild. Things happen in the wild. Don't admit that. Turn on? Things happen in the wild, man. You just admitted something weird. You said it's a turn on? So your algorithm is... I don't mean sexually. I mean, where are you... What other turn ons do we have? Go ahead. Define turn on. Turn on... It excites me, but not sexually.
Two-minute Mayfield over here. Diana, have you ever wanted news to break at a different time more than you do right now?
Two-minute Cody.
Which one?
Which I think would be good for him.
I mean, people, animals in the wild kill each other. I mean, I hate to like... And it turns you on. It excites me when I see a lion. I wrote a book about a lion. Revelation.
What do you feel? Like, does blood pump through your body?
Yeah. It's exciting. It fires you up, Greg. That's what you should have said. It fires me up. It fires me up. It's exciting to see the power and majesty of the king of the jungle in action. And it's good. Isn't it usually lionesses? But you don't want to watch, for example, a lion can rarely bring down a giraffe.
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Chapter 7: How does Dianna view the current state of the Giants' offense?
There are no bad boys. There's just bad choices, Diana. Put it on the poll. Is that what you use? Is a two-year-old capable of empathy? Because I believe you're asking too much of Joey there. Yeah, terrible twos.
So tell me about, have you guys tried the Gatorades in the can? Yeah, they're great.
Back in the day. I haven't recently, but I used to love them.
Chris, they're back. So I just ordered a case of them. Why is Gatorade better in a can than in a bottle?
Put it on the poll at Levitard Show. Is Gatorade better in a can than a bottle? To me, it feels like sacrilege to have it out of a can. It feels wrong. I'm not saying it tastes wrong, but it feels wrong. It tastes good. I'm just I felt unfulfilled when I had it because it was only 12 ounces. So like I was at the zoo and that's how they had it. So I bought a Gatorade in a can.
I chugged it and it was gone way too quick. Like Stone Cold Steve Austin?
Literally, that is how I knew the cans were back. I was at the zoo with the boys. And it must be a zoo thing. And I got a can of the green lime or the lemon lime. And I was like, this is the most delicious thing. But I was just thinking in my mind when I was drinking it, is it because of the nostalgia that we grew up with canned Gatorade? Or is it just actually better?
And I've had a bottled Gatorade since. Not as good.
I think it just feels colder, too. Like it tastes colder, if that makes sense. Yes. The best was when the Gatorade was in like the big glass. That's the best way to drink it. That's the best. It was in like that glass jar. We're too young for that. We don't know what you're talking about. At Levitard Show, does it feel wrong to drink Gatorade out of a can? Yes or no?
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