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The Dan Patrick Show

The Best of The Dan Patrick Show

22 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.031 - 3.763 Unknown

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human.

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5.228 - 12.618 Joe Jonas

Hey guys, it's us, the Jonas Brothers. I'm Joe. I'm Kevin. And I'm Nick. And guess what? We created our own podcast called Hey Jonas.

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12.979 - 16.464 Dan Patrick

We invented a podcast? Well, we didn't invent it. We just contributed to it.

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16.544 - 21.811 Unknown

We're the first people to do podcasts. We get to ask other people questions because we're sick and tired of being asked questions.

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22.092 - 24.675 Joe Jonas

Well, sick and tired is a strong way to put it, but you know.

24.755 - 25.356 Unknown

Tired and sick.

25.556 - 26.117 Joe Jonas

Tired and sick.

26.458 - 33.227 Kevin Jonas

Listen to Hey Jonas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Just listen. We don't care where you hear it.

33.764 - 52.397 Unknown

Another podcast from some SNL late night comedy guy. Not quite. On Humor Me with Robert Smigel and Friends, me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guests, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer Streeter Seidel, help an acapella band with their between songs banter.

Chapter 2: What are the Knicks' chances against the Cavaliers?

395.442 - 421.892 Unknown

John Starks, as Patrick Ewing said yesterday, gets a little too excited there. So I'd have to pick the fan base that's kind of my level, and that would be Sudeikis and Bateman. That would be like, this is a pretty cool experience, man. The atmosphere is pretty good. It wouldn't be like, oh, my God, Brunson's not hitting his shots. They've got to get the ball to Catmore.

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421.912 - 434.992 Unknown

Josh Hart, man, he's a glue guy. I don't want that if I'm going to a game where I'm not a true fan. Yes, Todd. And you have a sense of humor, so you'd appreciate they make little sarcastic remarks that kind of one-up each other.

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435.012 - 439.138 Dan Patrick

You can fit right in with them as everyone's people watching and just making little comments.

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439.608 - 458.737 Unknown

but you gotta be careful to try to not out funny the funny people because they're competitive And sometimes like Sandler's really generous when you're trying to be funny or Will Ferrell. You know, hopefully Jason Bateman and Jason Sudeikis would be forgiving if I was trying to be funny. Yes, Marvin.

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459.178 - 479.22 Marvin

See, this is the issue that I have with the Knicks getting further and further into the playoffs. You're getting guys that can afford the seats, not true Knicks fans. So no offense. I wouldn't want you front row because you're not a Knicks fan. No, Sudeikis and Bateman, I don't know if you guys are real Knicks fans. I know Tracy Morgan is. I know Ben Stiller is. I know Spike Lee is.

479.6 - 481.984 Marvin

Those guys should be there. So, no.

482.024 - 504.315 Unknown

I don't want to get booed on the Jumbotron when they realize that I'm not a Knicks fan. Usually you cheer everybody and you get the Zoolander look from Ben Stiller and all of a sudden they put talking hairdo Dan Patrick and people would be like, huh? Yes, Paul. So it becomes poser cam instead of Knicks fan cam. Yeah. And then you get booed. I don't want them.

505.076 - 530.678 Unknown

And, you know, sometimes we don't know exactly who is courtside. Here is an awkward moment describing some of the celebrities who were courtside last night. Brunson does it himself. Takes it to the length of the floor and lays it in. John McEnroe right there. Cedric the Entertainer is in the building. They're all loving it. Well, the problem was it was Bernard King, not Cedric the Entertainer.

530.698 - 541.293 Unknown

So that's courtesy of CBS. I'll give the announcer an A-plus for excitement, but I'm going to give him an F for courtside awareness. Yes, Marvin?

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