Why “We Do Not Care” became a rallying cry for menopausal women
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What does 'We Do Not Care' mean for menopausal women?
What you're about to hear might sound like a joke at first, but for millions of women, it landed more like a truth bomb.
Hello and welcome to our new and existing members of the We Do Not Care Club. I started this club for all women in perimenopause, menopause, and postmenopause.
That's Melanie Sanders, the creator of the We Do Not Care Club. Hello and welcome to USA Today's The Excerpt. I'm Wendy Noggle, USA Today Executive Editor of Entertainment. What started as a meme has exploded into a cultural moment. We Do Not Care has become a rallying cry for visibility, for setting boundaries, and for rejecting expectations women, specifically perimenopausal and menopausal women, are told to quietly carry. Melanie's new book, the official We Do Not Care Club Handbook, is in bookstores now. Melanie, we're excited to have you here today on The Excerpt.
Thank you so much for having me.
I wanted to start off, you're the mother of three boys. Most of them are grown, so they know what's happening on social media right now. How are they reacting to this phenomenon that you created and seeing their mom out there in this way?
I think they are probably just as shocked as I am, but also the attention can be away from them and more so me focused on the book and the movement.
How did Melani Sanders start the We Do Not Care Club?
So they're benefiting greatly.
And your videos have become so much more than social media posts. They really are this rallying cry across zip codes, across demographics. How do you see the We Do Not Care Club impacting conversations beyond social media when you're talking to so many women?
Within the WD&C, the We Do Not Care Club, this has become... a sisterhood and just being able to support each other and being able to have the conversation of what perimenopause, menopause and postmenopause looks like. The familiarity of just everyone rallying together and just say, we do not care much anymore.
And when you've talked to women across the country, what stories have impacted you the most? I mean, you've gotten this incredible outpouring of feedback. How has that changed you in your life?
Me being able to, from one simple post where I was just fed up with Melanie, to now look at this as a movement, it has really, really made me understand my value and my worth. Also to just know that in that moment, I was enough.
I was watching the Golden Globes and there was a moment that really made me think of you. Chloe Zhao was accepting her award for Hamnet and she referenced a conversation she had had with her star, Paul Mescal.
What impact has the We Do Not Care movement had on social media?
And there was something that he told her that really resonated with me. And I'm going to quote this. Learning to be vulnerable enough to allow ourselves to be seen for who we are, for who we ought to be, and to give ourselves fully to the world, even the parts of ourselves we are ashamed of, that we are afraid of, or that are imperfect, so that the people that we speak to can fully accept themselves for who they are. Does that resonate with you?
Yes, for sure. Like when we can just just release and it takes the pressure off, you know, once, especially in perimenopause and beyond, we are at capacity. And I say that often we're at capacity. And so many of the pressures and stuff from the everyday life is like, I can't worry about that anymore. Like I can't be OK with it being vulnerable. Just letting go. Who cares? You know, I was trying to decide what I was going to wear today. Oh my goodness, I'm going to be on TV. I have to wear this or do this or do that. And it's like, Melanie, girl, go put on a shirt and some pants and be okay.
How does the We Do Not Care Club foster sisterhood among women?
Because we do not care much anymore.
And you're talking about connecting on a more authentic level as well. I mean, we are in a very tumultuous time right now. There's so much going on in the news. How do you describe what people should care about and what they should go ahead and say we do not care about? How do you draw that distinction?
I think many times we focus on what looks good more so than what feels good. And I think we need to really dial it back some and say, what feels good to me?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What does 'We Do Not Care' mean for menopausal women?
0:04–1:28
2
How did Melani Sanders start the We Do Not Care Club?
1:28–2:54
3
What impact has the We Do Not Care movement had on social media?
2:54–3:56
4
How does the We Do Not Care Club foster sisterhood among women?
3:56–4:57
5
What are the most impactful stories shared by women in the club?
4:57–5:52
6
How can younger women benefit from the conversations about menopause?
5:52–6:45
7
What challenges did Melani face while writing her book?
6:45–7:39
8
How does Melani choose which brands to work with?
7:39–9:50
Speakers
3 identifiedMore from The Excerpt
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