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The Hauraki Breakfast Podcast

📻Pastafarian - The Radio Show

22 Jun 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What does Jerry think about changing your birthday?

0.25 - 17.403

The Hauraki Breakfast.

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17.723 - 20.689 Manaia Stewart

Get your insulation jobs sorted with Bunnings Trade.

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21.462 - 24.385 Jeremy Wells

Sherry and Minaya, the Hauraki Breakfast.

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24.405 - 43.082 Manaia Stewart

Welcome along to the Hauraki Breakfast, Tuesday the 23rd of June, 2026. My name's Jeremy Wells, this is Minaya Stewart. I'm back in the studio, made it back, made it out of Christchurch. Gotta be honest with you guys, I'm not proud of it, man enough to admit it. I have chapped lips once again. Christchurch has claimed you'd another victim. I don't know what it is.

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43.802 - 58.341 Manaia Stewart

And it's funny because I grew up down there, although Christchurch always had such a dry climate. But I refuse to climb into the pocket of big blistex. Good on you. And what's going to happen as a result of that is that your lips are going to go hard. They're going to shed a layer.

Chapter 2: What are some funny travel stories from the hosts?

58.501 - 74.824 Manaia Stewart

And then the new beautiful lips are going to come through the bottom of it and you'll be fine. Now, if you keep going with blistex, you'll just hang on. You'll hang on to your old lips. You'll hang on to your old lips. And eventually it'll come off anyway. Don't want to hang on to your old lips. You prolong it by about four days. Always said that.

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74.804 - 95.395 Manaia Stewart

A good deep soak in one of the massage beds, massage chairs at the airport yesterday as well. I think they might have listened to the show and turned them so that they don't face the security check out because they used to just face straight at it. So everyone that was coming through getting their bag scanned was just staring at you jiggling in the seat. Gave you a little bit of privacy.

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95.375 - 98.839 Manaia Stewart

I didn't ask you, but did you end up changing your flight? Did that work out? Couldn't.

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Chapter 3: How did the All Whites perform in their recent match?

99.6 - 117.099 Manaia Stewart

Couldn't. I could probably explain it, but it was quite a convoluted situation. I spent a fair bit of time trying to do it. Oh. But yeah, it was... Someone else has booked your flight for you. Someone else booked my flight under someone else's name. So I was like, if I go and try and change this, and they go, hang on, you're not actually the person you're purporting to be, terrorist, get out.

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117.339 - 144.422 Manaia Stewart

Oh, that sounds illegal. Yeah. So no. Well, welcome back. Two hours sitting in the airport. Well, yesterday we were talking to Jason Pine, Piney, who was over in Vancouver watching the Whites up against Egypt in the FIFA World Cup, and he said something special is about to happen today, fellas. Something special. So I watched the game, and nothing special happened.

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Chapter 4: What are some humorous claims to fame shared by listeners?

144.883 - 158.086 Manaia Stewart

The All Blacks lost to Egypt 3-1. They went up 1-0, though, in the first... After about 15 minutes, I think it was, when centre-back Finn Sermon, he headed a powerful corner kick from Tim Payne.

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158.507 - 168.43 Joanne McNally

Towards the end, the header, and New Zealand have the opening goal. A set piece, undoing Egypt, and Finn Sermon finds the back of the net.

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168.41 - 189.445 Manaia Stewart

And then we parked the bus for the rest of the half. Yes. And then Egypt came out in the second half and absolutely smashed us. We were rear-ended by being parked in a bus lane is what happened there. We were parked in the bus lane. We weren't a bus. And that's the problem. If you're going to park the bus, you've got to be in a bus. You park a car in a bus lane, you get cleaned up.

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189.465 - 190.847 Manaia Stewart

And we got towed in the second half.

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Chapter 5: How does Jerry handle his birthday celebrations?

190.867 - 211.735 Manaia Stewart

Yeah, we did. By a much better, more skillful team. Yeah, I only saw the second half. I had landed, my flight back from Christchurch landed and as soon as we touched down, everyone was checking the score and someone stood up and said, oh, 1-0. I was like, who's 1-0? Where's 1-0? Okay, sweet, sweet. Uber home, get to watch the second half just in time for the drubbing.

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211.755 - 233.798 Manaia Stewart

I feel like, sorry, let me put the football analysis headband on. Well, you do have it beside you there. Yeah, I do. And I was actually, I'm just trying to wrap my head around I just feel like the... Sorry, do I look like I've got more football credibility now? All of a sudden, I'm really looking forward to what comes out your mouth now. I know that the... As opposed to before.

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Chapter 6: What unexpected items do people bring on flights?

234.018 - 242.815 Manaia Stewart

The all-fights were... They were a little bit frustrated with some of the calls that were not being called. And I even noticed that the commentators mentioned it too, thanks to TVNZ.

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242.997 - 258.61 Joanne McNally

And the referee's decided that wasn't a free kick. The referee's let a lot go today. He's been a referee that wants the game to flow. And here is Salah cutting in from that right wing. Plays the one-two. Gets it back. And now Salah scores for Egypt.

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258.893 - 279.568 Manaia Stewart

Yeah, it was like, and they're trying their hardest, because it's a World Cup, they're trying their hardest to be impartial and objective. And so even the commentators go, oh, they're going to let that go. That was them saying, well, they've missed one there. Yeah. The most egregious one was, so our man Ben Old, he went off at one point.

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279.548 - 282.273 Manaia Stewart

And it was like, oh, it looks like an injury, but he looks like he's okay.

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Chapter 7: What are the humorous aspects of modern technology?

282.293 - 297.924 Manaia Stewart

Can't really tell. Then he swapped his shorts and came back on again. We were playing with 10 men for part of that second half because he was ordered off the pitch to go and put some new shorts on. And he said after the game, I've touched the ball and then I feel like he's fouled me. And then as I'm going to fall down, he's fallen down on my ball sack and ripped my shorts and underwear.

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297.944 - 314.684 Manaia Stewart

So I'm just out there standing like that. So he got his ball sack underwear and shorts ripped. You've got the football credibility headband on. Are you allowed to rip someone's ball sack with your boot? No, you're not allowed to rip ball sacks with boots. And that's always been a rule. Okay. I think we got our own back because we knocked that dude out at the end. Did you see him?

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315.485 - 318.348 Manaia Stewart

Man, footballers are not prepared for injury.

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Chapter 8: What is the AI-generated script for an airline safety video about?

318.368 - 339.842 Manaia Stewart

They don't deal well with injury. He got smoked in the head and he had his eyes shut. And he was rolling around like he was about to bloody cark it. Yeah, she was all go. But yeah, so what does that mean now? I think we can technically still go through. Hey now, hey now, don't dream it's over. We need to at least draw the next one and then I think maybe do we need another result to go our way?

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340.583 - 364.469 Manaia Stewart

What we really need is to beat Belgium on Saturday at 3pm and I think so we're 85th in the world and Belgium are like 9th or 10th so that should be fine. We've moved up. Have we? We're 78th. Hey, good. From that draw the other day. Yeah, closing in on Belgium. And then, so Belgium and Iran, they had a draw. Yes. And we had a draw with Iran. This is the frustrating thing about this.

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364.529 - 381.137 Manaia Stewart

You watch the first half of both these games we've been in, and it's like, we definitely could have won them. We're good enough. We're good enough. We're just going to put it together for the full 90. I don't know about that. Well, you wouldn't because you don't have your headband on. Well, I don't have a headband on right now, and I didn't have a headband on when I was watching.

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381.417 - 399.362 Manaia Stewart

Oh, that's a good point. But I thought that Egypt were way better than us. And what they did was different than Iran because they realized that instead of just letting us kick the ball around to each other and then defending up the field a bit more, Now, let me say this. I don't have a headband on. No, this sounds ridiculous to start with a headband on.

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399.903 - 418.762 Manaia Stewart

Instead of doing that, the Egyptians actually put pressure on the guys, our guys at the back, kicking the ball around. And as a result, we struggled. Yeah, basically in that second half, they were like, hang on, we're ranked 60 places ahead of these guys. Let's just put an insane amount of pressure on. They can't stop all of them. And a couple of them go through. And they did in the end.

419.263 - 441.649 Manaia Stewart

The floodgates really opened. We couldn't hold on to the ball. No, but look, again, they're ranked 60 places ahead of us. They've got far more professional level players and one of the greatest players of all time in their squad. And he went good too, Mo Salah. So, I don't know. I'm still looking hopeful. When is the next game? Saturday at 3pm. Belgium. Look out, Belgium.

441.669 - 451.525 Manaia Stewart

We're coming for you with some football credibility headbanging. Actually, not enough headbands on the pitch, too. No, there weren't, actually. From the All Whites? Can you get that thing over to me?

451.545 - 456.512 Jay Reeve

The All Whites? The All Whites?

456.733 - 468.851 Manaia Stewart

So, football-adjacent story, actually, that I was reading about yesterday. So, Rod Stewart, he was in Utah, and he had to put a pause on his concert and get the oxygen tank on. Oh, is that right? Yeah.

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