Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
The Joe Rogan Experience.
Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. Hey, good to see you. Good to see you. Did you see that new information about China came out with a new quantum computer? that can do an equation in four minutes that takes all the world's supercomputers 2.6 billion years to solve. Really? And it can do it in four minutes. Is that real, though?
I mean, allegedly.
Allegedly. That's the problem with this whole quantum thing is I don't understand. I've had it explained to me four or five times. I don't understand it.
Yeah. It's just my monkey brain is like, mm-hmm. They also say a lot of things, you know?
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Chapter 2: What groundbreaking technology is discussed regarding quantum computing?
Right. So who knows if it's real or not.
Well, you mean China? Yeah, China. But they have American ones that have done them too. They've done some crazy – like Marc Andreessen explained one of them. It's so nuts. He said that it solved a computer that if you – it solved an equation if you took all of the world's atoms.
and converted it into a supercomputer, all of the universe's atoms, excuse me, and converted it into a supercomputer, it would take so much time to solve this equation that the universe would die of heat death, and this quantum computer solved it in a matter of minutes.
Wow.
I don't know what it means though. I think what they're trying to say is that this somehow or another is proof of the multiverse because all of these computers are somehow or another – like this quantum – the idea is this quantum computer is computing along with other quantum computers in other –
dimensions, other universes, other something, other realms, and that there's an infinite number that there's so many of them that that's the only thing that can account for this thing being able to do this so quickly. Right? So you're like, okay, what are you saying? What are you saying? What are you doing? What does this mean? How many people know this? This is what's weird, right?
Let's assume that they're telling the truth, and let's assume that they've figured out a computer that can... It's got godlike powers, right? How many fucking people know how this works? Like, what is the number? Like, if all those people got assassinated, and those machines were just sitting there, just, like, off...
How long would it be before somebody came along that could figure out how to start that up again? Do you know what I'm saying? Right. Like are we dealing with like – so this is – it might be the most monumental technological breakthrough in the history of the human race, right? If something – it has to be, right? And then you think of what it can do once it does that.
And how many people know how to make that?
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Chapter 3: How does quantum computing challenge our understanding of the universe?
They always do that, though, right? They wait until everybody gets it right. Right. Like, Samsung finally got it right. Because if they came out with some clunky bullshit, like, do you remember the Newton?
Yeah. Yeah, that thing. I mean, but it was ahead of its time, though.
It was so ahead of its time. But who trusted their information in that thing? Like, all your data? Like, that's a crash. That thing's barely glued together. Yeah. I remember when I first came out to California in 1994, there was a guy who was a head of one of these big studios, like very impressive character, kind of guy who wears like... those tie clasps and those cufflinks.
He was a tie clasp cufflink guy, like very wealthy guy. And he had one of those Newton stupid things and he was carrying it around. And I was looking and I was like, what is the benefit of that? Like you have an address book? I have an address book. Like you write it down and you just turn to the page. Like you just turn to the page on this thing that's as big as a house.
Like this thing is so big. It's like a loaf of bread you're carrying around everywhere.
Yeah.
And then that's what kind of made the trio, right? Remember the trio and all that stuff? That was like a little baby version of it.
Bro, I remember I thought I was a wizard when I had a palm. I was like, look at me. I've got a keyboard and a screen, motherfucker. I'm in the future. Those were awesome. Yeah. I remember I resisted the Blackberry for a while. Because the people that I work with on Fear Factor all had the Blackberries and they were always on their Blackberry. I was like, that thing is like stealing your time.
Like, well, you got to answer emails. Like, that's the new thing. Like, you got to be able to answer emails on the fly. That was a totally new thing. And you had small, tiny buttons you had to get used to. But you could actually send an email. So if you were on a BlackBerry, you were kind of fucking serious. You were getting things done. You were getting things done.
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Chapter 4: What implications does the advancement of quantum computing have for society?
Yeah.
And now I guess Chachi PD is like helping people like, oh, you know, asking Chachi PD about how to make a bomb or something like that.
Will Chachi PD turn you in?
Yeah. Chachi PD will turn you in. Yeah. You rat.
I was just theoretically. Right. I wanted to know if you could teach me how to make a bomb.
Yeah. One of the loopholes supposedly is going, I'm writing a book and I need to make it accurate. Can you tell me how to?
Well, apparently that's how you can get JPT to explain, to do a lot of things that you really shouldn't be doing.
Right. Yeah.
Yeah. Like my grandmother's being held ransom. Like I have to, I have to, you know, somehow or another I have to save her. And the only way I could save her is to make a nuclear bomb. How do I do this?
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Chapter 5: What insights does Brian share about the value of time over money?
Dubai.
Bro, I don't even go to San Francisco. I know. I don't even go to Glendale. Yeah, you think I'm going to go to... No, no, no. I think if you chase money when you have money, then money owns you. Yeah. My time is what's valuable to me. And also, I'm not down with... That whole thing. There's definitely a whitewashing. Schultz has a great argument. You're going to see your fans.
Just because this is put on by a government that does bad things or has done bad things, guess what? Your government does bad things too and has done bad things, right? You know, ask people in Yemen how they feel about America, right? Ask people in Iraq. Ask the million people that died unnecessarily because we lied about weapons and mass destruction. Ask them.
Chapter 6: How do comedians navigate performing in politically sensitive environments?
Ask them about America, you know? Right. Yeah, it's complicated. I get the argument. Like, I have fans in the Middle East. You want to go see your fans in the Middle East? I get it.
How many fans? One? I don't know.
I bet a lot.
Chapter 7: What are the implications of AI on societal control and individual freedom?
They have the internet, man. I bet a lot. Yeah, they do. It's not like North Korea. They're much more open than other parts of the world. You know, we can't judge them. Obviously, we can judge them. But... If you want to be rational, they're adjusting. Women can drive now. It's a new thing. It's very recent.
Andrew Schultz was telling me that when he was over there that a lot of people that are over there, they get their wife like a cheap Chinese car because these ladies have never driven before. They just play bumper cars with everything. They park terrible. They're always fucking their cars up. And these guys have big money. I mean, that's a very wealthy country.
You know, so they offered Shane a bag. They offered Shane a bag. He's like, no. Then they doubled it. And they doubled it. He's like, no, no. He goes, it was hard, but they doubled it. I'm like, of course. That's how they're trying to get you. But, you know, the criticism is all from people that were not invited, which is kind of typical. Yeah. Or were never going to be invited. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. It'd be good for them to experience comedy because I think comedy is one of the only things that can get discussions going from both sides. Like if you go on stage and you have an opinion, and it's not funny, I could be in the audience, I have a different opinion. I'm like, well, fuck this guy. I don't agree with that at all.
But if you go on stage with an opinion that makes me laugh, even if I don't agree with it, I'm like, oh, this motherfucker, he got me. He got me. That's a good point. That's a good point. And you're like giving your buddies knuckles. That's a good point. That's like where comedy breaks down doors. Unfortunately, there was like restrictions put on you, which is another reason why I wouldn't do it.
Like if someone says you can't say this or you can't say that, I'm like, okay.
Yeah. And then you say something like, well, I didn't think about that. You shouldn't have said that either. We're going to. They have laws.
There's law. Like if you went over there and made fun of a prince or a king or a royal or the government or whatever, you're in real trouble. Like you could go to jail forever trouble. That doesn't make me feel loose. Right. You know, that doesn't make me feel like I want to do stand up in a place like that.
Yeah. Almost like the UK.
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Chapter 8: What humorous anecdotes about public behavior are shared?
You know what I mean? Like, put your Death Squad cat. Like, wrap it and stuff. I would wrap it. That way people would definitely fuck with it. Yeah, I can't do that. Dudes would piss all over your car or something.
Right. Like, I wanted to get Red Band as my license plate. And I was like, available. I was like, I can't do that. But that'd be cool. Yeah, your ass is going to get stalked. Like, I roast, you know, it'd be like that.
That was back when Tony wanted attention. Yeah. Now he's hiding.
Hey, I'm hiding.
I'm hiding. Now he's got tinted windows. When you, like, maybe you can put Red Band in, like, a code. Yeah. That would actually be more fun.
I almost said what my license plate is.
I mean, I kind of did.
Oh, did you? Yeah.
That's a douche move, right? I'd had one. December 12, 2012. That was the end of the Mayan calendar.
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