Should Everyone Get a Prenup?
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Why are modern couples choosing prenups beyond protecting wealth?
Hey everyone, it's Jess. Before we start, I wanted you all to know this is going to be my last week on the show for a while. I'm going on maternity leave. I'll be back early next year, but in the meantime, you'll be in good hands with my colleague Imani Moise, who'll be co-hosting the show with Ryan while I'm gone. Now, here's today's episode.
So I am a millennial and a woman, which means that one important reference for me when it comes to all things love and marriage is sex in the city.
What? Okay, this is a little unusual. He has you on a vesting schedule.
And that includes prenuptial agreements or prenups. There's one episode in which Charlotte is about to marry Trey, who's very wealthy. When he hands her a prenup before the wedding, she gets her lawyer friend Miranda to look over the contract, which lays out what would happen if Charlotte and Trey got divorced.
For every five years that you're married, you get a percentage of $500,000. I'm only worth $500,000? Over 30 years. Well, maybe that's your wholesale price.
And then this year, there was the hit divorce memoir, Strangers, by Bell Burden. Burden stopped working to raise the kids.
I really handed over my financial life to my
husband.
That's
Burden on The Drew Barrymore Show, advising more women to have that conversation. Because when her husband abruptly left after 20 years of marriage, she was surprised at how little money she was entitled to in her prenup.
Have that conversation with your partner. Like, if this ended, what would happen to me? I really kind of got very comfortable in not knowing and put you in a terrible position. It did. I was really at risk of losing my financial security.
These scenes reinforce something a lot of us may think about prenups, that they're mostly for the ultra wealthy, very rich people who want to protect their assets. But these days, prenups are changing. They're getting more popular, and they aren't just for the super rich anymore. A 2023 survey showed that one in five adults who were either married or engaged had a prenup, and Gen Z and millennials are more likely to have one.
Culturally... Prenups are becoming something that's seen more of an empowerment tool rather than a stigmatized contract that kind of jinxes your marriage.
Our colleague Erin Mulvaney has been reporting on prenups.
It's definitely changed to be more of a financial planning tool for the middle class. And that's definitely a change that's been happening in the last few years.
How did the rise of social media influence the perception of prenups?
Welcome to The Journal, our show about money, business, and power. I'm Jessica Mendoza. It's Friday, September 18th. Coming up on the show, the prenup gets a modern makeover.
It isn't romantic, but marriage is a contract. So even if you don't get an official prenup, there are still laws that would apply if you get a divorce.
In a way, whichever state you're in kind of is your prenup if you don't have one.
In that case, the state decides how your assets get split up.
So it kind of depends. Roughly, a judge or the couple themselves will do an equitable distribution of assets. Some states are more purely 50-50, and the court will basically kind of decide what's fair at the end of a marriage, given whatever the circumstances are. And that's largely will be kind of out of the couple's hands.
Now, more and more couples are looking to change that and considering getting prenups.
There's just a growing awareness about prenups just because there's TikToks, Instagram. Are prenups really that offensive or do we just not know what they are? Let me tell you a reason why you should get a prenup even when you have nothing. No assets, no money. One of my non-negotiables before getting married is getting a prenup.
Erin came across influencers giving advice under hashtags like prenup talk and quippy taglines like protect your peace, protect your bag or romanticizing financial transparency.
I think that that has definitely helped the messaging of what a prenup is.
What has led to the recent popularity of prenups, do you think?
Yeah, a few things. One, it's the people who are younger and getting these are kind of millennial, Gen Z, who a lot of them had gone through situations where their parents got divorced and saw the other end of it.
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
Why are modern couples choosing prenups beyond protecting wealth?
0:00–2:53
2
How did the rise of social media influence the perception of prenups?
2:53–6:48
3
What legal options exist if a couple skips a formal prenup?
6:48–10:13
4
Why are “stay‑at‑home” clauses becoming a popular prenup feature?
10:13–12:00
5
How do couples use online software to draft their prenup without lawyers?
12:00–15:19
6
What unexpected topics (like rings or embryos) do prenup questionnaires reveal?
15:19–18:11
7
How did Anna and Zach’s prenup shape their view of marriage and business?
18:11–18:34