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The Kyle & Jackie O Show

FULL SHOW: Journalling

29 Jan 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

0.031 - 34.026 Unknown

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34.046 - 41.017 Unknown

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41.037 - 49.63 Jackie O

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50.858 - 64.546 Unknown

Jacky O. Kyle and Jacky O. The Kyle and Jacky O Show. Morning, everyone. Hello. Hello. Hey, hey, I'm sorry. I'm just going through some mail. Yeah. Oh, did I get some good things sent in here?

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65.007 - 65.267 Kyle Sandilands

Yeah.

65.408 - 66.329 Unknown

What did you get?

66.349 - 68.614 Kyle Sandilands

Remember you used to ask for money on your birthday?

68.594 - 84.254 Unknown

Yeah, yeah, yeah. People used to send in money. It was very nice of them. Little kids stapling $5 to a card. Yeah. People would say, don't you think that those kids should keep that money? I say, no. The art of giving is lovely. Well, you give this show away for free, don't you?

84.274 - 86.778 Kyle Sandilands

That's right, yes. Well, yeah. To the people. I mean, the money's good.

Chapter 2: What are the benefits of journaling?

175.15 - 194.852 Unknown

Yeah. So I built that thing. I redesigned that big monster out west. To do a walled garden like theirs? Yeah, I've got a walled garden there. Don't they have like, aren't they on chateau grounds? Why are they building a walled one? Don't they do that in just built up areas like Tokyo? No, it's to keep the foxes out and all that sort of stuff. It's a French thing. Right, Bruno?

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195.152 - 198.917 Unknown

The walled garden is a big thing in France? Bonjour, yeah, big thing in France.

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198.937 - 201.621 Kyle Sandilands

But like for what reason? Just to keep the foxes out?

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201.841 - 221.808 Unknown

The animals. Yeah, it's just also a flex. You've got a mic there? A flex? You've got a mic that might work? Yeah, that's very nice. That's a dressing gown with palm trees. Enough going through the... You look like, you know, your Elton John holidaying in Palm Springs. If you were listening to radio yesterday, you might have realised a lot of technical difficulties, a huge internet outage. Yes.

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221.828 - 237.103 Unknown

I think it shut down the Commonwealth Bank, ANZ Bank, this radio network. Apparently, if you were listening yesterday on iHeart, I was disconnected altogether from the network. from my home studio didn't work. Jackie, you were with a different internet provider, which is why your internet didn't drop out yesterday.

237.584 - 254.374 Unknown

But if you're listening on iHeart, you would have heard multiple 15-second versions of a story about the Eiffel Tower and just kept hooking it the same 15 seconds over and over and over. My husband, Damien, listens through iHeart and that's what he said. It just kept repeating. It was unlistenable. Yeah.

254.354 - 258.881 Kyle Sandilands

Sorry, everyone, about that. For how long were we repeating every 15 seconds?

258.901 - 265.753 Unknown

I don't know, but the information we got from the listeners was the story sounded great, even the 15 times it was started.

265.773 - 268.237 Kyle Sandilands

It was still better than the opposition.

Chapter 3: How do personal experiences shape our views on journaling?

344.024 - 346.348 Unknown

No, oranges apparently. Is that right?

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346.368 - 349.032 Kyle Sandilands

Yes, I heard that the other day. What part of an orange?

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349.312 - 352.317 Unknown

You know, when you slice them up like a football halftime match.

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352.817 - 354.64 Kyle Sandilands

Are you sure, Peter?

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354.66 - 358.306 Unknown

Why would they do that? Where did you hear that? Just from a friend.

358.506 - 362.492 Kyle Sandilands

And if they wanted it to look like oranges, then why didn't they use orange tiles?

363.181 - 366.447 Unknown

I don't know, but do you know they're self-cleaning as well? They clean themselves, those cars.

366.467 - 366.668 Kyle Sandilands

Do they?

366.688 - 371.116 Unknown

They do. In the rain, they're made from a very special ceramic. Whatever.

Chapter 4: What leads to the discussion about the impact of TV shows on medical knowledge?

3111.351 - 3124.267 Kyle Sandilands

But I just kept seeing it on TikTok and then my algorithm changed. And then I'm sure it came up on a SVU episode. So it's been like a whole thing. And then I was worried I was going to have another baby.

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3124.387 - 3132.216 Unknown

Oh, my. But she should fear no longer a doctor. Is that right? I really think there is unbelievably close to zero. Brian.

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3132.276 - 3132.857 Kyle Sandilands

There you go.

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3132.877 - 3135.22 Unknown

It's not going to happen. Pump away, Charlotte. Pump away.

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3135.24 - 3138.355 Kyle Sandilands

Pump away. Emma, what's your question, Emma?

3138.376 - 3144.654 Unknown

Hi there. Emma, you're on. Good morning. Hi there. What do you want to ask the doctor? Hi.

3144.835 - 3150.781 Kyle Sandilands

Quick question. So I'm obsessed with TV shows, right? So you've got shows like your Grey's Anatomy, Chicago Med.

Chapter 5: How do personal experiences shape opinions on Australia Day?

3150.841 - 3162.953 Kyle Sandilands

Yes. How realistic are these stories? Because my partner can be like, oh, babe, I'm feeling this certain way. And I'll be like, oh, hey, do you have a pain here? Do you need a fart? You know, those things. Yes. And most of the time I'm right.

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3163.213 - 3168.779 Unknown

So do I need a diploma or can Grey's Anatomy make me a doctor? Can you learn things from watching these shows?

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3168.799 - 3170.02 Kyle Sandilands

And how real are they?

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3170 - 3197.27 Unknown

Look, there's no doubt that the majority of them are going to be based on medical fact. But I'll be honest, most medical conditions are pretty boring. So when it comes to making television, we have to pick the fun bits, the sad bits. We need to exaggerate. So... There are patterns there. There are patterns there. But no, they're not overly accurate. I mean, ER, that wasn't too bad.

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3197.31 - 3200.273 Unknown

What about the new ones, the PIT and the Chicago Med?

Chapter 6: What are the challenges faced by contestants in the Gull Idol competition?

3200.313 - 3221.248 Unknown

They seem very dramatic. Yeah, look, and that's one of the reasons why I just don't watch them. Because they're mostly focusing on the relationships and the chaos that comes from them. It's the same reason I didn't watch Frasier, because they had no real idea how radio worked. And it wasn't that funny. Did you ever watch Frasier? I didn't, no. Oh, so horrible.

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3221.428 - 3223.931 Kyle Sandilands

Okay, well, there you go. Emma, Brett, go ahead. Brett, you're on.

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3223.951 - 3241.029 Unknown

Hey, good morning. Hey, morning, everyone. How you going? Good, good. The doctor's here. What's your quiz? How you going, doctor? I've got a hole at the top of my butt crack that keeps seeping every now and then and filling up with pus and that and every now and then it leaks out and it's quite uncomfortable to sit down. Where's the hole at the top of the butt?

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3241.049 - 3261.103 Unknown

So the butt crack above that, there's a little, what, a little pinhole? Yeah, just inside the butt crack there near the top and it keeps filling up with pus and blood and seeping around there. What the hell is that, doctor? What is that hole? Can I ask a question, mate? Are you super hairy? Yes. Yeah. Have you put on some weight maybe in recent times?

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3261.563 - 3281.711 Unknown

Over the last couple of years, I have put on weight, yes. And lastly, do you sit down a lot for your job? Driving around in the car, but I'm always out all day up on roofs and that as well. So sweaty, roofing, climbing, exposed, and then back on the car seat, a bit of plumpness and a hairy bloke. What's going on here?

3281.911 - 3300.312 Unknown

So we all have a small little sacral dimple area, and some people can actually have a hole there. And when people are really hairy, really sweaty, sometimes when we put on extra weight, a lot of dirt and bugs get dragged into...

3300.292 - 3326.433 Unknown

top of your ass crack bruno has i'm feeling mine at the moment don't forget my mum said oh my god bruno's put on so much weight but bruno overheard because mum was on speakerphone with me and i just ignored i and bruno's very hairy and he's like put on a few kilos yep and and what these uh bring your ass crack in bruno Oh, for real? Yeah, bring it in. Maybe he's got a hole as well.

3326.954 - 3349.806 Unknown

And these holes suck the hairs in, and then the hair just acts like a foreign body, which triggers the infection. How does that, like a black hole, it just sucks things into it? Yeah, the sweat and the movement of your buttocks sitting down all the time just sort of all gets dragged into it. Right. Pruna, why haven't you appeared in here? Is this a little sensitive for you? It's...

3350.41 - 3364.516 Unknown

I'll be honest with you, my butthole is not in a good place at the moment. Just to be upfront with you, I won't get graphic or into detail. Best keep it out there. Have you been doing things? It's not great. I told you. No in, only out. It's like a construction site.

Chapter 7: What humorous comparison is made about seagulls?

6224.541 - 6249.387 Kyle Sandilands

You need to see his face as well for that to have really landed. Half man, half bird is what I'm saying. Now you're like an anxious seagull. Now you're a depressed seagull.

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6250.953 - 6251.834 Unknown

Very good.

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6252.515 - 6253.055 Kyle Sandilands

I'm sorry.

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6253.075 - 6255.318 Unknown

They can't be faulted. Oh, that's so good.

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6255.338 - 6258.602 Kyle Sandilands

You've got the tongue thing happening as well. Yeah.

6258.622 - 6261.805 Unknown

So good. Rob. Rob. You've hydrated.

6262.646 - 6263.127 Kyle Sandilands

Mm-hmm.

6263.247 - 6267.652 Unknown

I saw you in the drink. Peter, where's his drink? Why does it take so long to do anything around here?

6267.672 - 6268.453 Kyle Sandilands

He's running now.

Chapter 8: What are the details of the Gull Idol competition?

6270.315 - 6296.166 Unknown

That's finished. Do you need a water? Yeah. Hopefully that's still water, but Pete's usually here with the sparkling. No one wants the sparkling. Unless it's black and called Coca-Cola. Yes. Okay, Robbie, you've hydrated. All right, what have you got for me? Okay, give me a frightened seagull. Okay, give me angry. Oh, not very angry. Oh, angry. Come on, angry. This is Jackie.

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6296.186 - 6299.93 Unknown

She really gets people angry. Heightened anger.

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6299.95 - 6301.632 Kyle Sandilands

What about confused?

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6305.088 - 6312.782 Unknown

A lot of those sound the same, Rob. Yeah, Rob. I love you. You're a great man. But is Rob the weakest of the three?

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6312.802 - 6317.191 Kyle Sandilands

Rob, you are the weakest of the three. Oh, Rob, sorry. And so therefore you are out.

6317.311 - 6320.376 Unknown

You will not be named gull idol winner.

6320.757 - 6330.815 Kyle Sandilands

So that leaves Jay and Adam for tomorrow. I mean, if this was semifinals audition, you can't even imagine what we have in store for you tomorrow.

6331.796 - 6349.426 Unknown

Okay, live audience tomorrow. Frankston's finest will gather around the outside broadcast. Balls will fall from the sky. You guys aren't there for that. You guys are there to win $10,000 for Gull Idol to celebrate Australian Idol starting on TV Monday night, 7.30 on Channel 7. I can't wait.

6349.646 - 6352.83 Kyle Sandilands

I'm actually so excited about just that alone.

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