Beyond the Manosphere: What Boys Actually Need
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What is the purpose of The Masking Tapes and who is the guest Johnny Cole?
Like what does it mean to work on myself at the same time as maintaining relationships with my family and with the world? There are men who would with if I could call them, they would go to Ohio right now and like take care of my mom and my sister.
How have you seen AI show up in the young people's lives that you've worked with? You are constantly being rejected all the time without even knowing it. Like someone else on their phone while you were sleeping was swiping left on you. Do you have any like hot takes when it comes to the manosphere? Welcome to season two of The Masking Tapes. I am your host, Carolina Hidalgo McCabe, and I'm so excited to continue on this journey with you all. Welcome Johnny to The Masking Taste. How are you?
I'm doing very well, Carolina. Thank you for having me.
As you know, The Masking Taste is a podcast where we talk about manhood, masculinity, especially across the gender divide. And Johnny, you are an incredible creator, mentor, teacher, educator, and especially around healthy masculinity. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself?
So I create Manosphere alternative content across social media platforms so that men and boys have something to look for outside of what they're currently being fed through the algorithms on social media. And outside of that, I also do this thing called men's work, which is any gender-specific activity for men or masculine identifying folks to work on ourselves, whether that's connecting relationally, working on our emotional skills development, being vulnerable, opening up or having these critical conversations. About what it means to be a man or boy in today's day and age. And through that work, I have founded a company called Hey Brother Co. I try to see myself as kind of like a digital br brother figure for as many people as possible because I think we're at a time in history where people want like some some brotherhood, you know, some guidance.
You know, some guidance.
How did you get into this work? How did you get started? And and many people would be like, that's a very tall order to be creating manosphere alternative content. Like how that's a lot of pressure. How do you deal with that? How do you deal with that?
It is a lot of pressure. I got into it out of necessity though, kind of this idea of if not me, then who? Because I grew up in a domestic violence household with a really turbulent relationship with my father, who I currently have no contact with and haven't for about seven years. And I didn't have that sense of brotherhood or that sense of like eldership or guidance. I didn't have a positive male role model who is encouraging me and uplifting me. And as I got older into about college age, I started to notice this extreme deficit in my life. Like I was yearning for a type of connection that just I didn't see modeled for me. Modeled form. So then I learned about this thing called men's work a couple years later and decided like none of the organizations out there doing men's work really suited me.
A lot of them relied on like Jungian archetypes or the hero's journey or the mythopoetic men's movement. And they just didn't resonate with what I I thought of as the type of man I wanted to be. So I started my own organization to bring men together from around my life and now beyond to have these critical conversations and to form a brotherhood and that's that's what I have.
Wow, that's incredible. And who were the models for you that helped you create that new vision of what it meant to be a man beyond what you were just seeing online and in these existing workplaces or or organizations?
Some of the primary models I would say are Ashanti branch of the Ever Forward Club and the work that he does with boys in Oakland, California. The Man Enough podcast and everyone there, Liz Plank, Justin Beldoni, Jamie Heath. Um, that was a really huge turning point for me, that that piece of media. And I also really admire um a lot of the folks in the Mankind project. So one of the directors, Boys in Hodgeson and Gareth Higgins, and there's a couple other folks involved with MKP that I really look up to.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the purpose of The Masking Tapes and who is the guest Johnny Cole?
0:00–4:34
2
How did Johnny’s childhood trauma shape his mission to create Hey Brother Co.?
4:34–11:43
3
Which mentors and community projects inspired Johnny’s vision of healthy masculinity?
11:43–14:44
4
What practical steps does Johnny recommend for young men to find role models and build brotherhood?
14:44–21:27
5
What does Johnny say is the hardest part of being a man today – emotional competency vs. selfishness?
21:27–37:41