The New Man
Episodes
What’s Really Holding You Back: How to Get Stuff Done — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
18 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Why do so many capable people struggle to get things done? Learn to identify the roadblocks that hold us back and the necessary ingredients for gettin...
The Trap of Trying to Reach Your Full Potential — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
03 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Do you feel like your life is supposed to be bigger than it is? What would it mean if you weren’t exceptional? And why do so many successful folks...
I Shouldn’t Have to Ask: When Relationships Feel One-Sided — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
17 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Are you tired of being the one who just handles everything? Do you ever catch yourself thinking, “I shouldn’t have to ask for help”? Or are yo...
Staying Stuck vs Moving Forward: Doing the Hard Thing — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
02 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Is it clear that something has to change, but you’re afraid to make a move? How do you know when it’s time to throw in the towel? And how does “...
Why Being Perfect Makes Us Weak — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
19 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Whether it’s your looks, your job, or whatever — do you feel a lot of pressure to get it right? Do you ever beat the hell out of yourself for ma...
What Do You Really Want? Getting Out of Autopilot and the Prescribed Life — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
06 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Do you know what you really want in life or are you just reacting to whatever comes your way? Do you do things because they actually strengthen you o...
Are They Busy or Just Not That Into You? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
16 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you care more about the relationship than your partner does? Does it seem like something else is getting their attention? And are your efforts to...
How to Deal with Holiday Stress, Guilt, and Family Pressure — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
30 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Are the holidays a source of stress and dread for you? Do you feel boxed in by family obligations? And does the thought of doing things differently ...
The Sexless Marriage: Can it Be Repaired? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
18 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Are you afraid of being trapped in a sexless marriage? Does your partner treat sex like it’s just another chore? And what are the ways you’re ki...
Is Money Killing Your Relationship? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
04 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why does talking about money with your partner feel so loaded? Why can financial conversations turn into full-blown fights? And what if the real iss...
Too Nice? Too Smart? Too Stuck? Why Men Struggle with Power, Emotions, and Sex — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
22 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why do so many women chase the jerk but overlook the nice guy? Do you ever lose yourself once you’re in a relationship? And what does it mean when...
Macho Jerks and Neutered Nice Guys: Let’s Talk Masculine and Feminine Energy — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
08 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why does trying to be a “real man” scream insecurity? Why do so many guys turn into neutered, “yes dear” pushovers? And could all this talk ...
The Mindset That Keeps you Stuck, Overwhelmed, or Lost — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
24 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you know what needs to be done but fail to follow through? Does life constantly feel like there’s just too much to do? And are you waiting for ...
How to Spot a Toxic Person Before It’s Too Late — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
09 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you have someone in your life that, no matter what you do, it’s always your fault? Do you often walk on eggshells, worried the next thing you sa...
Success Without Soul: Dropping Comparisons and Proving — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
27 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever hit a big win…and felt nothing? Have you chased success, only to realize it was shallow or meaningless? And what happens when we fin...
Stop “Shoulding” All Over Yourself — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
12 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you have a voice in your head telling you what you should and shouldn’t do? Why does this “tyranny of should” drain our aliveness, passion, ...
When Your Partner Feels Like an Adversary: Ditch the Bickering and Disrespect — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
30 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you treat the pizza delivery guy with more kindness than your partner? Do you frequently bicker or cut each other down with biting humor? And how...
Drama Triangle: Getting out of the Blame Game — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
16 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you feel like you keep getting stuck in the same old arguments? What drains our aliveness more than work? And what if the thing killing your sex ...
Feeling Stuck and Uncertain: Moving from Anxiety to Clarity — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
01 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever feel stuck about what to do with your life, relationship, or career? What’s really going on when we say, “I don’t know what to do”...
Is It Healthy to Use AI for Therapy? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
17 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you talk to AI like it’s your therapist? Is it wrong to prefer interactions with a machine over a human? And how is our pursuit of comfort kill...
Why We’re Attracted to the Wrong People (and What to Do About It) — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
03 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why do some guys crave women who aren’t good for them? Is the “nice girl” always boring — and the “bad girl” more fun? And do we really ...
How to Have Deeper Conversations — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
21 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you get drained by small talk? Does it feel like no one else likes to talk about the things you love? And how can you have deeper conversations e...
Should You Settle in Your Relationship? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
06 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Should you settle in your relationship? Do you ever wonder if there’s someone out there who’s a better fit? And could raising the bar too high l...
Am I On The Wrong Path? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
22 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever fantasize about escaping your current life? Is fear the one setting your goals and expectations? And do you have any idea what would tru...
Dealing with Blame and Big Emotions in Your Relationship — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
08 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Is it easier to do a cold plunge than to deal with your partner’s emotions? If your partner’s in a bad mood, should you just be their punching ba...
Striving to be Set for Life — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
25 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What does it mean to 10X your life? Why are we so afraid to go “backwards” financially? And what’s really driving our desire for more, more, m...
They Cheated on You. Now What? — Adam Nisenson, A Man’s Guide to Partner Betrayal
11 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If your partner cheats on you, can the relationship be repaired? Is it your fault if your partner cheats? And how do men respond differently to bein...
Can Your Sex Life Be Saved? — Ruth Ramsay
25 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Is sex a source of frustration with your partner? Do you feel sexually rejected by them? And if you don’t push for sex, will your partner ever ini...
Struggling with Spirituality — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
11 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you struggle with spirituality? If you stay off the naughty list, does the Universe give you what you want like Santa Claus? And why can spiritua...
Randy Blythe (lamb of god) on Drinking, Death, and God
28 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you believe you need alcohol or some other crutch to function at your best? Do fears like imposter syndrome or stage fright ever completely go...
Feeling Stuck and Out of Alignment — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
13 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Is there a voice in your head that says you need to make a change? Do you experience scarcity if you’re not always making more money? And what can...
Why Finding Your Purpose is So Frustrating — Jordan Grumet, The Purpose Code
30 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Does it feel like your life is on hold until you figure out your purpose? What’s the real reason many folks are driven to be wealthy? And why do s...
Why People Pleasing is Killing Your Sex Life and Career — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
17 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is it normal for you to forget things until someone nags you about it? Do you ever wonder why your relationships seem shallow or you miss out on care...
How Being Guarded Kills Aliveness, Meaning, and Purpose — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
03 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Are you devoted to anything other than money, security, or status? Does living with an open heart make you weak? And how is staying guarded killing ...
Are You Jealous About Her Sexual Past? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
19 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Are you the best lover your partner has ever had? How could you ever be sure? What if they preferred having sex with someone else more than you? And...
Rickson Gracie – How to Find Comfort in Darkness
05 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is a lack of confidence your worst enemy? What does it mean to develop mental, emotional, and spiritual strength? And how does accepting death make ...
Am I On The Wrong Path? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
22 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do obstacles mean you're on the wrong path, or are they simply part of the journey? Is the universe conspiring against your dreams, or is it just you...
Build True Confidence by Understanding Unhealthy Self-Esteem — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
08 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
What’s the common link between workaholism, greed, and love addiction? Does your sense of self worth go up and down like a rollercoaster? And is t...
Dealing with Anger and Emotional Constipation — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
17 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
If you’re angry, is it better to bottle it up or lash out in retaliation? Do you get stuck in a loop thinking of things you should say to that jerk...
Avoiding Vulnerability Leads to Feeling Empty — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
03 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is our drive for more money, more status, or more stuff really just an attempt to fill a God-sized hole in our lives? Do you ever feel awkward when e...
Facing the Fear of Being Alone — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
20 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Are you with someone because you really want them or because you’re more afraid to be alone? Are you settling for junk food relationships that neve...
Is Therapy Frustrating? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
06 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is the purpose of therapy to just dig up junk from your past? We talk about why many folks — including therapists we know and love — find the conv...
Can a Nerd Become a Stud? Reinventing Yourself — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
23 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Can a nerd become a stud? Alyson and Tripp react to a movie called The Hitman and the topic of reinventing ourselves. This leads us to discuss pickup ...
Can You Learn to Trust Your Gut? — Mark Divine (Uncommon: Simple Principles for an Extraordinary Life)
09 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you trust your gut when making decisions? Author, entrepreneur, and former Navy SEAL commander Mark Divine (Uncommon: Simple Principles for an Extr...
Sebastian Junger’s Near Death Experience — Sebastian Junger (In My Time of Dying)
25 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
What’s going to happen to you after you die? Is death something you ignore or something you use to enjoy your days more? And are near death experi...
Feeling Pressured to Get Married — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
13 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you feel pressured to get married because you’ve been with someone a long time? Are you and your partner kicking the can down the road so you do...
Motivation, Resistance, and The Cult of Success — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
30 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is FOMO driving you to constantly be busy, busy, busy? Is it scary to admit that the hustle and grind is killing your motivation? And when is our re...
Finding Your Gold and Essence — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
14 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever feel like something is just not quite right with your life? Do you have most of what you could want but still feel like something’s mis...
Spiritual But Not Religious? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
30 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Does your BS meter keep you from having a spiritual life? Are mystical experiences just our brain chemicals fooling us to believe we have a connectio...
Is Marriage Killing Your Aliveness? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
16 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is marriage a death sentence for the part of you that is wild? Alyson and I dive into the topic of domestication. We explore how responsibilities and ...
Is it Cheating to Watch Porn? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
02 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Is watching porn the same as cheating on your partner? Alyson and I try to help someone who is at odds with his partner about porn. Instead of debatin...
Is Healing for the Weak? – Jeff Boss (fmr Navy SEAL turned therapist)
19 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Navy SEAL Jeff Boss struggled to find his way as a civilian. Self-medicating with booze and women, he believed healing was for the weak -- until he co...
How to Tell if You’re Soul Mates — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
05 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you believe in soul mates or is that just some rom com BS? And what relationship advice would have helped your younger self avoid a huge headache? ...
Going to War with Yourself — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
13 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Alyson and Tripp discuss trying to improve ourselves by going to war with ourselves. What really helps us attain the emotional peace we hope that vict...
Less Information. More Taking Action. — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
31 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you have an amazing collection of books but suck at taking action? Today’s call is with a personal growth junkie. He can easily spend hours pouri...
Commitment Issues: What Would Make You Excited to Commit? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
17 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Commitment Issues: What would make you excited to commit to a relationship? In today’s coffee date, Alyson and Tripp Lanier talk about radical hones...
Getting Your Partner to Change — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
02 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you wish you could change something about your partner? Alyson and I flounder through a conversation about commitment, refusing to be the bad guy, ...
What’s Wrong with Meditation? — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
19 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is meditation just a way to escape the discomfort and uncertainty of life? Today my wife Alyson talk about what drew me into decades of spiritual prac...
Making Sense of Science and Spirituality — Alyson and Tripp Lanier
05 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Alyson and Tripp Lanier share a coffee and discuss Tripp’s spiritual path, making sense of science and spirituality, and white guys with dreadlocks....
Needing the Approval of Others — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
21 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
What truly motivates us to be more successful? An emotional call with a guy who has a checkered past plus damage to repair with his family. We start o...
Are You Playing the Wrong Game? — Brian Johnson Areté
07 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Ever feel like you’re playing the wrong game in life? Heroic CEO Brian Johnson on his new book Areté: Activate Your Heroic Potential plus a challen...
How to Beat Procrastination — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
24 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
How to Beat Procrastination. Today’s call is with a guy who’s sick of allowing procrastination to get the best of him. He sets tons of goals but d...
The Workaholic Curse — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
10 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you feel like everything will fall apart if you don’t bust your ass everyday? A workaholic with no life beyond the office and home is tired of th...
Stop Running Away from Your Problems — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
26 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
When today's caller feels challenged he numbs himself with weed or food. This may provide temporary relief but it's making his anxiety and marital pro...
Putting Yourself Out There — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
14 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Are you stuck professionally because you’re afraid to put yourself out there? Today we talk with someone who’s limiting his opportunities because ...
Feeling Like You’re Not Enough — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
29 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
A retired entrepreneur feels like sh*t because he thinks he hasn’t accomplished enough. We explore a future where he’s no longer bullied into prov...
Fighting Resistance and Laziness — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
16 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is it okay for someone to do whatever they want with your partner, your kids or home? Today’s coaching call is with a man being pushed around by laz...
Rat Racer Mentality: When the Best isn’t Enough — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
01 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you spend more time worrying about the future vs enjoying the present? Do you fear that your success could be snatched away at any moment? This rat...
Moving from Anxiety to Confidence — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
19 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Are you wasting time on the wrong path? An ER surgeon wants to change careers. We identify the limiting beliefs killing his confidence and learn how c...
The Need to Be Legit — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
05 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
On this coaching call, a former client with too many options but not enough time. Luckily, we identify the mindset that’s draining her energy and pr...
The Pressure to Succeed — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
21 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
How do you deal with the pressure to succeed? In this call, I talk with a father who feels an immense fear of failure. We take a look at what drives h...
From Rumination to Mental Strength – Anson Whitmer (Calm/Mental App)
06 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is Huberman's approach over the top? Why should we never go "full Goggins"? And is there a better way to train our minds than the macho-achiever-bro-a...
Imposter Syndrome and Proving Your Value — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
23 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is imposter syndrome driving you nuts? In this conversation, we talk with a guy who’s convinced his success will come crashing down if he doesn’t ...
Why Goals Are Exhausting You — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
09 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is the pursuit of your goals exhausting you? Are you unwilling to relax because something bad will happen? I talk with a high achiever who’s uncerta...
Dealing with Burnout — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
25 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Are you dealing with burnout? Stuck in a "same sh*t different day" routine? In this coaching call, we see how one man reclaims his fire when he sees t...
“I’m Stuck and I Don’t Know Where to Go Next” — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
11 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this coaching call I talk with a high achiever who doesn’t understand why success isn’t as satisfying as expected. Instead of helping him pursu...
Dealing with Marriage Money Drama — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
28 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Dealing with Marriage Money Drama -- I coach a married guy facing financial challenges. We discover there's something far more toxic poisoning their r...
Fear of Failure | Why Is It So Hard to Commit? — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
14 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Does the fear of failure keep you from making a commitment? And what can the honey badger teach us about getting over ourselves? In today’s coaching...
Old is Just a Mindset – Steven Kotler
27 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is getting old just a mindset? Steven Kotler (Gnar Country, The Art of Impossible, Flow Research Collective) discusses the new science of peak perform...
Have You Outgrown Your Career? — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
15 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this coaching call, I talk with a guy who's built a successful business. The problem? It’s killing his soul. He’s lost touch with aliveness and...
Can Sexual Attraction Be Repaired? — Shana James
31 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Can sexual attraction be repaired? Shana James (Honest Sex) talks about what really opens the doors to have more frequent and better sex. Hint: it's n...
When Your Business is Choking You — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
17 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Are you meant to do something else professionally? And how does nice guy syndrome show up at work? In this coaching call, I talk with an overwhelmed e...
Mark Manson Made a Movie — The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F
02 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Mark Manson's The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F is now a movie. Mark and I discuss making the film, what makes him feel insecure, and what Will Smith t...
How to Deal with Money Fears — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
How to deal with money fears. Are you sick of your 9-5 day job? Is money a mysterious force that seems to always have power over you? In this coaching...
Phil Stutz + Barry Michels – The Tools to Defeat Your Inner Enemy (Encore)
13 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
“The Tools” guys Phil Stutz (Stutz Netflix documentary) and Barry Michels discuss building energy, overcoming your worst habits, and the danger of...
How to Deal with Nice Guy Syndrome — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
06 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Does your partner want to solve problems or win arguments? What can you do if you feel trapped in a relationship? And how can you challenge your par...
Phil Stutz + Barry Michels on The Tools (Encore)
29 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Phil Stutz and Barry Michels (Stutz Netflix documentary, The Tools, Coming Alive) on how to deal with procrastination, grudges, and all kinds of negat...
Am I Stuck in the Wrong Career? — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
22 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Are You Afraid You May Be Stuck in the Wrong Career? In this coaching call, a former golf pro now has money and stability. But something’s missing. ...
The Painful Reason You’re Burned Out — Coaching Call with Tripp Lanier
08 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Is your drive to be productive burning you out? Does the idea of relaxing create anxiety or guilt? In this coaching call, I help a man explore what dr...
Integral Theory and The Cultural Dumpster Fire — Jeff Salzman, The Daily Evolver (Encore)
01 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Bored with the whole left vs right gridlock? Could this culture war make us stronger? Jeff Salzman (The Daily Evolver) discusses Ken Wilber’s integr...
What is Mastery of Self? — don Miguel Ruiz Jr. (Encore)
25 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Don Miguel Ruiz Jr (Mastery of Self, The Five Levels of Attachment, The Mastery of Life) discusses how to stop taking things personally, scarcity mind...
Pressure, Anxiety, and Doing What You Love — Chip Conley (Encore)
18 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Chip Conley (Wisdom @ Work, Joie de Vivre Hotels, Modern Elder Academy) discusses anxiety, workaholism, finding a calling, success and making sense of...
How to Train the Brain to Overcome Fear – Jaimal Yogis (Encore)
11 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Jaimal Yogis (The Fear Project, All Our Waves are Water, Saltwater Buddha) on how to train your brain to overcome fear. Discussed: building motivation...
Should You End Your Relationship? – Alyson Lanier (Encore)
04 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
How to get your relationship on the right track, how to make a big commitment, when it’s time to leave the relationship. https://www.thenewmanpodc...
Mark Manson on Why the World is Going Crazy – Mark Manson (Encore)
27 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Mark Manson (The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Everything is F*cked, Will) slaughters our sacred cows. Also, why hope makes us fight one another, a...
How to Have (Really) Difficult Conversations – Mark J Silverman(Encore)
20 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Mark Silverman (author and coach) talks about having difficult conversations — Here’s what he’s learned after pulling back the curtain and telli...
Why Do Dolphins Get Stoned? The High Performance Benefits of Altered States – Jamie Wheal (Encore)
13 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Jamie Wheal (Stealing Fire, Recapture the Rapture, Flow Genome Project) discusses altered states, flow, and how Navy SEALs accelerate learning. https...
How to Turn an Enemy into an Ally – Bill Shireman (Encore)
06 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Bill Shireman (In This Together, Future 500) discusses how to turn an enemy into an ally, how we're played by political polarization, and finding purp...
Why We’re All Full of Sh*t – Jonathan Haidt (Encore)
30 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Jonathan Haidt (The Righteous Mind, The Happiness Hypothesis, The Coddling of the American Mind) discusses why groups get crazy, our fear of rejection...
The Way of the Peaceful Warrior — Dan Millman (Encore)
23 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Are you more afraid of rocking the boat or looking like a wimp? Do you see your current life as a diversion or as the training ground for being your ...