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Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's The Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual, amazing relationships. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality, number one best-selling author and host of The Dr. John Deloney Show on the Ramsey Networks, is my co-host today.
We talk about your life, and he does as well, including relationships and boundaries and family and money. And we're going to do it all today. And we're going to talk about you right in front of you. The phone number is 888-825-5225. The advice is free, and some say it's worth what you pay for it. 888-825-5225.
One week from yesterday, John's new book hits, and that means you've got just a couple of days to get the Buying a Non-Anxious Life book. Building. Building. I'd like to buy one. Buying the building. I'd like to buy one. Buying the book, Building a Non-Anxious Life. I'm trying to get all these in one sentence here. It's running on. And so there we go.
The book is coming out, and if you buy it on a pre-sale, you get $75 in free bonus items, including the e-book, the audio book, and one of John's talks. Instant access to that Smoke, Fire, and Freedom that he did at one of our SMART conferences. So jump in and get all of that before the book actually comes out next Tuesday. You don't want to miss this. And...
We are seeing record numbers of these books come out. I was just in a marketing meeting this morning here, and it's the number of you that are thinking that he may have something to say intelligent about this subject is amazing because he does. And the good news about this, it's not a psychology book that will put you to sleep. It's actually on the shelf where everyone can reach it.
Yeah, that's important for me to, um, you know, we've, we've got a world now where Stanford medical school professors are able just to crank out a podcast and talk to each other, some really high level stuff, some amazing insights into the human mind. And I often leave some of those exchanges like thinking two things. Wow. That's amazing. And what I need to do right now. Right.
And so this book is, I handed it to my, my 13 year old and said, well, can you read this, go through it? And he read it and he said, dad, I'll give you two stars.
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Chapter 2: What insights are shared about managing finances in a marriage?
Whoa! That's brutal. But it's designed for everybody to be able to access it and read it and then to, more importantly, implement a plan on how to make your life better.
Because anxiety is not the problem. As it turns out, it's the alarm saying there's a problem.
Right.
And that problem might be that your body has scanned the environment, recognized you're lonely. It might be that you have tied yourself to a bank and they're telling you what to do tomorrow. It might be that your marriage has fallen apart. It might be that you've been trying to hold up the universe all by yourself for a long, long time. And there's several things that will set your alarm off.
And we have an entire world designed around the idea that the problem's over there, the problem's over there, the problem's over there. And I'm challenging people to go look in the mirror and say, what can I do right now in my home or with my family, with my community and start making these things better right now? Yeah. Wow.
Wow.
Good stuff, folks. Check it out. Go to RamseySolutions.com and get it while it's hot. Building a non-anxious life. $20. It's a deal on a book. Today, I was looking at some data the other day. Our publishing guys were bringing me. The average hardback book right now in America is $32.
Really?
Yeah.
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Chapter 3: How should couples approach financial disagreements?
We've been together for 15 years, married for almost 13 of those. We love each other very much and we'd love to stay married, but we feel like we've tried everything when it comes to managing our finances and we just can't seem to agree. The last step that we have not tried is divorcing our finances. So I'm calling to ask if we should divorce our finances.
What would that get you?
Well, let me give you a little bit more background. So we met at 21 and 24, respectively, and had equal amounts of student loan debt. So we both had about $20,000 each. So we decided the easiest thing to do would be combine our finances. We were young. We didn't have any assets. So it just made sense. So, however, we both come from very different financial backgrounds. And...
I tend to be on the offense and he tends to be on the defense. And we both feel like we're pulling each other and dragging each other along on a path financially that we don't want to be on. He was pretty steeped in FIRE, the Financial Independence Retire Early Movement, and would prefer to spend less and retire very early. He's 39. I'm 36, first perspective.
He'd like to be retired tomorrow if he could. And I prefer a slower burn. I'd rather make smart decisions, found investments, and work harder and earn more to achieve our goals and lead maybe a more comfortable lifestyle.
So if he retired today, what would he do with the rest of his life?
Well, the things that he enjoys. He'd probably still make money, but that's always the question that I have asked him.
So he's built a life he doesn't enjoy?
Not necessarily. He just doesn't like to work.
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Chapter 4: What are the implications of separating finances in a relationship?
Great. What I'm telling you is this isn't about money.
hear me say that it's not about your money it's not about your finances one of the key things we learned in studying 10 000 millionaires was none of them said i drug my spouse into this kicking and screaming almost all of them said i had a unified plan with my spouse that caused us to be able to achieve these goals You are dreaming. This is not going to happen. It's bad relationally.
It's bad mathematically. It's bad financially. You're wrong. Don't do it. This is The Ramsey Show. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. John, in quotes, that's not his real name in other words, from Louisville, Kentucky, not his real place, in quotes. Big secret call coming in. So, John, what's your question? Yes, sir.
Well, about two years ago, I won one of those multi-state lottery drawings with a group of coworkers, and I haven't told anyone besides my wife. And besides one sibling, no one knows. How much? My question for you, after taxes, it was about $22 million. Holy crap. Wow.
Holy crap is the understatement of the century.
Yeah. How old are you? It was a lot. I'm edging up on about 50 years old.
Okay. Okay. And so you haven't told anyone, and I've got some guesses, but why?
Why?
Well, the first thing I did when I found out that I won was research. And it said that you get to read all those one in five people lose their lottery winnings or go bankrupt within 10 years.
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Chapter 5: What are the emotional and mental benefits of being debt-free?
Right. And get the elephant out of your dadgum living room, which is the living room, by the way, ironically. Yeah. And the way we said it before we had John with two PhDs to help us understand it was if your house is paid for, take your shoes off, walk through the backyard, the grass feels different. You breathe different. And you won't work at a toxic place anymore because you have to.
You're not stuck anymore, folks. And so the solving for this is, you know, when I first started teaching this stuff, I thought, well, if you got rid of a house payment and you invested a house payment, you can turn that money into a million dollars pretty quick. And that's the math part, the financial part.
But there's an emotional part, a spiritual part, a relational part, a medical health, a mental health part. You know, someday it'll be done. I don't know that I'll ever get around to doing it, but a study of the medical condition and the life, quality of life and longevity of life of people who are debt-free versus those that aren't.
Chapter 6: How does downsizing impact financial freedom?
They're quietly starting to leak out into the world where people are doing mental health and emotional health and debt and starting to use that correlative data. It's pretty frightening. I've talked to some doctoral students who are interested in doing their dissertations on student loans and people with debt versus the mental health of those who don't owe anybody anything.
And if you think about this, think of all of us have had the moment in our career when we think, Oh, man, I got to go have a hard conversation with my boss. I may not survive this one. Imagine your wife or your husband can put your face in their hands and look at you and say, hey, we're going to be okay.
We got plenty of money. Go tell the truth. We got plenty of money. We got no house payment.
Go tell the truth. Go be you. And we don't have any house payments, man. Like, that's a different conversation. There we go.
This is The Ramsey Show. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. Spencer and Jordan are with us in the Ramsey Solutions headquarters lobby on the debt-free stage. Hey, guys, how are you?
Hey. Pretty good.
Welcome.
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Chapter 7: What key lessons can be learned from the journey to becoming a millionaire?
Where do you all live? Terre Haute, Indiana. Terre Haute. I love it. Very good. Good to have you. All right.
How much debt have you two paid? We paid off $150,000. We sold our house. Wow. Wow. How long did all this take? Well, selling the house took a couple months, but we lived in the house three and a half years, and we downsized from 3,000 square foot to about 1,200 with the family of five. Whoa. But hey, no mortgage payment, so it's worth it. Hardcore. Wow.
So are you all renting now?
No, we bought it with cash or what we made from our other house, so... Yep.
So you bought a house, so you don't have a mortgage.
No mortgage.
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Chapter 8: How do personal experiences shape financial decisions?
You're debt-free, debt-free.
You sold the house, bought another house with the equity, no mortgage of any kind. How old are you two?
I am 31. 32.
But in order to do this, you moved into a tiny little place.
Yes, sir. No regrets. No regrets.
I love it. Okay. And you don't have to be there forever. It's a step. Yes, it's a step. And you're 32 years old. And what's this house worth that you're living in?
130 135 I'd say we actually just cash flow to remodel on it too so okay so it's pretty nice okay and we can live there for a few years and then move up easy easy easy and so okay again so this whole experience has really did gone down pretty quick right Yes, sir.
But, uh, we actually, uh, grew up in, in, you know, Ramsey, um, uh, foundations, right? We, we have family members who have followed the, um, baby steps and pass that on to us. Um, Jordan actually has a great story with the total money makeover.
Yeah, when I was a junior in high school, my parents saw that I was not great with money and they were like, we'll pay you $20 to read the total money makeover. So great $20. It did not stick until I got married.
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