Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
What's going on, my friends? Welcome to the Ryan Lee Podcast, where we love to keep things short and sweet for you each and every week. We always wanna give you just a little nugget of inspiration that we believe is going to add value to your life. Today's episode is entitled, Who Do You Think You Are? Who do you think you are?
I want to begin today's episode by unpacking a statement and a mantra that you and I can easily fall prey to. And it is this idea that you and I should fake it till we make it. Yeah, we should fake it till we make it. But I... I actually disagree with that statement. I don't think it's fake it till you make it. I think it's believe it before everyone else does.
Chapter 2: What does 'Who Do You Think You Are?' mean in the context of personal growth?
You see, I think that the power of a personal vision is wildly underestimated. One of the biggest things that I actually see holding people back from reaching their potential is a quiet habit that we have normalized. And it's the habit of waiting. It's waiting for permission. It's waiting for agreement. It's waiting for applause before we take that next step.
We're waiting for somebody else to see something in us that perhaps we could be seeing all along. My friend, if you wait for everyone else in your life to see what you see, you are going to be waiting a very, very long time. Because vision rarely makes sense to people who are comfortable with the present. I remember speaking at a conference. I don't know what it had to be.
10 years ago, and there were over 20 speakers at this conference. And at the end, I was hanging out with the host of the event, and they had just gotten some of their data back from their survey from the app or whatnot. And he said, hey, Ryan, I want to let you know good news. You were actually voted the number one speaker at the event. I'm absolutely humbled by that.
Chapter 3: Why is the idea of 'fake it till you make it' misleading?
I thought, man, that's incredibly kind. And it was what it was, but Then I slowly but surely realized something else, and that was I was actually paid the least of all the other speakers. And in somewhat of an awkward, honest moment, I asked my friend at the time, I said, hey, man, here's the deal. If I was voted number one, why am I not paid like the number one speaker?
And here's the deal. There are reasons, fair reasons, logical reasons. You got to factor in experience and market value and ticket sales.
And are you a draw? Are people signing up and registering for this event because they see your name on the docket? It's lots of things that go into speaker selection and speaker pay. And it all made sense. But that moment forced me to wrestle with something so much deeper. Am I going to wait for them to see me the way that I see me?
Or am I going to wake up tomorrow and get back to work and figure out ways to add value to the people in my life? Whether it's a client, whether it's a friend, whether it's a family member. Like, am I waiting for somebody else to value me before I value me? And I remember there was a time where I used to be a video guy. I actually had a video business.
That was actually my background and what I really did a lot in college. So I spent a great deal of my career actually behind the camera, editing, producing. I had a job where I was actually helping everyone else look good. And then I began to begin the journey of transitioning into the speaking space. And a lot of people that knew me as a videographer, well, they were genuinely confused.
Like, hey, you speak English? Yeah, yeah. Actually, I really enjoy it. I know, but aren't you the video guy? Well, I am, but I'm a video guy today who actually speaks. And I almost found myself having to explain myself to other people. And I had to almost have this live rebrand. I'm not talking about colored fonts. I'm talking about...
I had to actually step outside of a lane that people had grown accustomed to me being in. You see, everyone didn't agree that I should be a speaker. It wasn't something that made sense to them.
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Chapter 4: How can waiting for permission hinder your potential?
But at some point, I had to make a decision that I was not going to let old categories define my future capacity. It's interesting. More recently, I wrote a book called How to Work with Complicated People. And a leader looked at me and said one day, he said, why in the world would I want my employees to read a book about complicated people? I said, hey, man, you actually don't have to.
Maybe the book's not for you. I don't think every book's for every person. It is what it is. And I said, but hey, if you happen to work with some complicated people, well, then you know what? Maybe this book Well, help. And you could just tell he he wasn't a fan of the idea or the book or whatever. And no big deal. You know, no sweat off my back. But it was interesting.
Six months later, I ran into him again and he just looks at me. He goes, your book is amazing. And I was like, oh, that's great. My entire team needs to read. And I'm just like, oh, man, you know, that's that's great. But but my friend, here's the lesson. If I had waited for his affirmation to publish it, I would have never published it.
If I was waiting for other people to go, man, I'm with you, everything in my life would be delayed. It's interesting. Sometimes the same people who doubt you today just might quote you tomorrow. But that's only if you keep going when they don't get it. Here's what I'm going to encourage you today.
Whatever that thing is that you might be waiting for somebody's permission to do or to become, don't wait for them. Don't wait for them. That's a line you're standing in that goes absolutely nowhere. So I'm going to encourage you to apply for that role that you feel underqualified for. And before you talk yourself out of it, let me ask you something.
Have you ever worked for someone who was underqualified? I'll wait. Yes, obviously you have.
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Chapter 5: What personal story illustrates the struggle with self-perception?
We all have at some point in our life. I've got a A friend of my wife and I's is actually her best friend. She calls herself our best friend. I mean, me and my wife are married. We are one. But it is really her best friend. And I just kind of chime in every now and then. But nevertheless, she's getting ready to start shooting some content.
And she's getting ready to really kind of put herself out there. And we are just extremely proud of her. But she's nervous. And she should be. Because that part is normal. But the hardest part about stepping outside of your comfort zone and putting yourself out there isn't the algorithm. It's not the camera. It's not the comments.
The hardest part is stepping outside of the box other people have quietly put her in for years. Yeah, she's never posted like this. She's never written a book. She's never stepped into the court of public opinion at this level. And when you step outside of your lane or if you decide to create a new one, a small critical voice will show up right on cue and it will whisper one question.
And that question is, who do you think you are? Who do you think you are? And that is the point of today's episode. Because growth will always trigger that question. Who do you think you are? Would you indulge me? Would you allow me just for a moment to answer that question for you? Who do you think you are? You think you are growing past old paradigms. Who do you think you are?
You think you're a leader and you might have to see it before they do. Who do you think you are? You're someone with a master's degree and you might have to believe it's possible before they do. Who do you think you are? You are somebody that woke up one day and decided you are going to make a difference in somebody else's life.
And so you might have to have a vision for yourself before somebody else does. You might have to believe it before they ever give you a round of applause. You might have to make a move before it feels safe. Who do you think you are? You're a person that's made a decision that you don't want your life to be mediocre. And I'll just tell you this. Vision does not require consensus. It's not a vote.
You don't need a board meeting to have personal vision. What you need is courage. Yeah, what you need is courage. And I just think the moment that you stop asking for permission is the moment that your life actually starts making sense.
I don't know if you know this, but did you know that Walt Disney passed away in 1966?
Which is interesting because Walt Disney World officially opened its doors in 1971. Five years before the iconic theme park ever opened its doors. The founder and visionary passed away.
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