The Two Pints Podcast!
Episodes
A Massive Surprise for Will - Bonus Episode Part 3
20 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Part 3 of our very special bonus Pod featuring Will's wife Michelle. In this episode the big questions…'What’s the best gift they’ve given ...
A Massive Surprise for Will - Bonus Episode Part 2
18 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Part 2 of our very special bonus Pod featuring Will's wife Michelle. On this episode they discuss their best qualities, who wears the trousers, who is...
A Massive Surprise for Will - Bonus Episode Part 1
16 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
A very, very special Bonus Podcast this week which you won’t want to miss. Ralf has a massive surprise for Will….hopefully he won’t be too freak...
Sex Songs - A Swift Half
13 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
A little 'Swift Half’ on a Friday for you and time for more of your questions. This week we cover Fat Gaz, Welsh Pronunciations, Strange Delive...
Sporting Bloopers - 'What Will William Tell?'
11 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
A bit of a different ‘What Will William Tell?’ this week as Will delves into the hilarious world of sporting double entendres. Got a question...
Does Size Matter?
09 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
For the first time in 7 Series Ralf has actually done some Podcast Prep, so strap yourself in as he takes us on a whirlwind tour of subjects including...
Fantasy Casting : A Swift Half.
06 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Some great listener questions this week, thanks for sending them all in and apologies if we didn’t get round to yours, including Fantasy Podcast Hos...
Monks and Mouthwash - 'What Will William Tell?'
04 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
On this week’s ‘What Will William Tell?’ our Will has been down a bit of a ‘history wormhole’ to discover tales about Enlightenment, Devil C...
Foot Fetishes and Boring Sports
02 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
This week we agree to take on a very unusual, feet based, money making challenge! Plus what is the most boring sport in the world, weird trends a...
A Free Pass: A Swift Half
27 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Who would we be allowed to have a ‘free pass’ with for a night? Plus which Supermodel did Ralf meet and who is better at Sport? Got a qu...
A Hotel on the Moon: What Will William Tell?
25 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Fancy a Trip to the Moon or a Holiday on Mars? On this week’s ‘What Will William Tell?’ Will has been investigating ’Space Tourism’ and it’...
Vabbing and Scrabbing.
23 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
This week we find out about the strange world of ’natural perfumes’ - let’s just call it that to be safe! Plus a visit to the world’...
Advice for your Younger Self: A Swift Half
20 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
It’s time for a ’Swift Half’ which means it must be Friday!! More listener questions including what advice would you give to your younger self a...
The Worst Year to be Alive - What Will William Tell?
18 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
What was the Worst Year to be Alive? Will has been digging around the history books and he thinks he’s come up with the answer. Got a question ...
Sliding Doors
16 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
A bit of a deep one this week as we chat about ’Sliding Doors Moments’ - you know, those times when you realise that life can go in two different ...
Pet Peeves: A Swift Half
13 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
It’s Friday! So that means it’s time for a ’Swift Half’ to get us ready for the Weekend. This week we’re answering some more of your listene...
Face Farts - What Will William Tell?
11 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
'What Will William Tell?’ is back for 2026 and Will has been searching the internet for more weird and wonderful stories and facts. This week a very...
Spies, Surprises and Sean Penn
09 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Now ‘Dry January' has been and gone we’re back into the swing of things with the usual Podcast on Monday, ‘What Will William Tell’ on Wednesda...
I need your Prayers.
02 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Ok, confession time. We (well the Producer) got our dates wrong and this is the last of our ‘Dry January’ episodes in….er….February! Anyw...
What the Hell do those Notes mean??!!
26 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Now this might come as a surprise to many of you but we do actually do prep for this podcast, however in this episode it became very clear that some p...
Windmilling at Wembley
19 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Ralf is still looking like he lives in a cardboard box but receives a welcome kick up the arse. While Will is wired and ready to take on 2026 with a w...
That was 2025!
12 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
We thought we’d ease ourselves into 2026 with a few shorter pods for January - just to let us get back into the swing of things and also because Ral...
Midlife MOT - Numan Bonus Episode
15 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We’re back with a bonus episode! Numan’s Dr Dave joins us to chat about all things men’s health and tackles your listener questions. We look at ...
Invisible for the Day.
12 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Our Final ‘Swift Half’ of the Year and we’ve got more of your questions - thanks to everyone who’s emailed and messaged us during 2025. As alw...
Will’s Christmas Crackers.
10 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We love Christmas so for this ‘What Will William Tell?’ Will has discovered some ‘Festive Facts’ - including why do we have a Xmas Tree, who b...
I LOVE BEEEEEEEED!!!!!
08 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Merry Xmas everyone and we’re getting into the festive spirit on this episode as we chat favourite Xmas songs and Films. Plus A.I, Robots, ‘A...
Pints or Tugs?
05 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
There’s a lot to get through in this week’s ’Swift Half’. Lookalikes, Crocodile Bollocks, Strictly, Mistaken Identity and have you had mo...
Sex, Surveys and Several Layers.
03 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
‘Behave!’, ‘I’m not having that’ and ‘That’s bollocks’. Just some of Ralf’s reactions to this week’s ‘What Will William Tell’....
Are you a Psychopath?
01 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For absolutely no apparent reason we decided to take a Psychopathy Test on this week’s pod and it threw up some interesting results! Plus shaving yo...
I wasn’t expecting that.
28 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
More listener questions and this episode went down a route no-one was expecting. Something a bit different, genuine and honest. This Episode is s...
The Dancing Plague
26 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
OK, bear with us with this one. As you know Will like’s to come up with amazing facts for his ‘What Will William Tell’ and this week’s he’s ...
Were the Moon Landings Faked?
24 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
According to Will the Moon Landings never happened - it was all fake! So this week we are joined by @SciManDan in attempt to try and convince Will tha...
Ghosts and UFOs.
21 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
‘Hello People!’ Time for some more listener questions for your Friday Swift Half. We cover UFOs, Ghosts, losing your voice, pressure and what...
Weird Museums
19 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
A bit of culture for you on this week’s ‘What Will William Tell’ as Will takes us on a virtual tour of some of the World’s weirdest museums.&n...
Technology, Teeth and Taste Tests.
17 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Battles with Technology, Teeth problems and Ralf surprises Will with some unusual snack options - how did they go down??!!? Plus hanging out with...
Upstairs Today, Downstairs Tomorrow.
14 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
More listener questions, including if you woke up tomorrow as the opposite sex what's the first thing you'd do? Plus the ’Tea and Toast’ debate ra...
Sixth Sense or Coincidence?
12 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do we have a Sixth Sense, is Deja Vu real, can premonitions come true? This probably won’t surprise you but Will and Ralf have very different opinio...
Dancing on a Pub roof
10 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will grasses himself up and reveals his past attempts to make it in a Boy Band, plus Drunk Auditions, DIY and Doctors who might not actually be Doctor...
Our last day on Earth.
07 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Time for some more listener questions and on this week’s 'Swift Half' we somehow go from our favourite flavour of crisps to Will trying to find his ...
Brains, Bangs and Jazz.
05 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Another amazing tale from Will and this week he’s delving into the mysteries of the human mind. Warning: this episode does involve us ‘perfor...
Life in 200 Years Time.
03 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What will life be like in 200 years time and what will people of the future think about how we lived our lives in the 21st century? We got out our Cry...
Stand or Sit, Scrunch or Fold?
31 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
OK, so this one went on a wild journey that neither of us could have predicted! Will overshares in a very animated and detailed way about his toilet h...
Mr Mellor’s History Lesson.
29 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s back to school and a history lesson on this week’s ‘What Will William Tell?’ . Your teacher, Mr Will Mellor, has been delving into the hi...
Little White Lies
27 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will has an extraordinary tale from his school days about how those little white lies can spiral completely out of control. Plus we warm up for our To...
Is that real or a prosthetic?
24 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Which TV show made Will shout ‘F*ck Off’ on a train and Ralf described as ‘Unbelievable’ - find out on this week’s ’Swift Half’……tha...
Vibrators, Love Chairs and The King of France.
22 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
More amazing facts from Will and on this week’s ‘What will William tell’? we somehow manage to go from Chainsaws to the World's Tallest Couple v...
Europe v America
20 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
America we love you. We love your films, music, entertainment, food, theme parks, trainers (sorry sneakers)….you name it, it’s great. However with...
What’s the Weirdest thing you’ve ever Googled?
17 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Strap yourself in dear listener because on this week’s Swift Half we delve into our Internet search history. You won’t be surprised to hear that s...
It’s not what it looks like!
15 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
More fascinating facts from Will including the man who married his car and why Will should never go on ‘Great British Bake Off’!This Episode is sp...
Wet Bread
13 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will has a surprise for Ralf and it’s fair to say it doesn’t go down well….anyone got a sick bucket!!!??? Plus anniversaries, overthinking and s...
Friendship, Families and F*cking Brad Pitt.
10 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
More of your questions, some of which took us on a turn we really didn’t expect…….from weird families to Thelma and Louise!This Episode is spons...
Tortoise Orgasm
08 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will has been delving into weird facts about Animals, and when we say weird, me mean WEIRD. You don’t get this on David Attenborough Documentaries!T...
Slow Down, you D!ck!
06 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We're back and the chat goes from Contentment, to kidnapping rally drivers, (allegedly) via bad accents, we find out that Will's about to die, and all...
What would you change about yourself?
03 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Time for some more listener questions on this week’s Swift Half, starting with What would you change about yourself? It leads to some surprisingly h...
Our Friend Ricky Hatton.
01 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Ricky Hatton was a legend, a champion, an amazing bloke and also a great friend. We can’t believe he’s no longer with us. Love you Pal, W&...
FOUR INCHES?!
29 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This Episode is sponsored by Numan.com. Head to Numan.com/twopints for 60% off clinically proven ED treatment with a free blood test that could h...
Regrets….I’ve had a few.
26 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This Episode is sponsored by Numan.com Head to Numan.com/twopints for 60% off a testosterone blood test test to check your levels....
Pluto and Pineapples:
24 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This Episode is sponsored by Numan.com Head to Numan.com/twopints for 60% off a testosterone blood test test to check your levels....
Scrotox, Oasis & Blood Tests. We’re Back…..- S6 E1
22 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
THIS EPISODE WAS RECORDED BEFORE THE SAD NEWS OF OUR FRIEND RICKY HATTON'S PASSING. WE WILL BE PAYING TRIBUTE TO RICK IN OUR UPCOMING CONTENT. RIP HIT...
Swift Half Best Bits Part 2
24 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
A few more of our favourite Swift Half funnest parts!W&R x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Season 5 A Swift Half - the best bits!
23 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
As it's the end of the season, have our favourite swift half clips in one go! See you soon, have a great Summer! W&R x Hosted on Acast. See acast....
The last episode of Season 5, Episode 16
19 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hey guys,Our last week of Season 5 is a banger, we hope you love this ep, we wrap up all our chat for the season. We'll be back in September. While we...
Episode 15 - Tour Memories 2!
14 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hey guys,Our Penultimate week of Season 5 is all about the tour, reminding you what fun we have on the tour! If you like what you hear and you've not ...
Episode 15 - Tour Memories!
12 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hey guys, Our Penultimate week of Season 5 is all about the tour, reminding you what fun we've had including this week the chat we had with our mate P...
The Best bits of Season 5 Part 2
09 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
With 2 more eps till we take a summer break we remind ourselves of their favourite bits of the season so far part 2!W&Rx Hosted on Acast. See acas...
The Best bits of Season 5 Part 1
07 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
With 2 more eps till we take a summer break we remind ourselves of their favourite bits of the season so far and Will tells us about Bring Him Home. D...
Screaming through my Funnel - S5 E13 A Swift Half
02 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Would you rather go into space or to the bottom of the ocean?Tour tickets are selling fast, get yours now www.twopintspodcast.com!W&R x🎙️ liv...
Farts that smell of Roses & Chocolate.... What Will William Tell.... S5E13
30 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Would you like it if your farts smelled of Roses & Chocolates?Tour tickets are selling fast, get yours now www.twopintspodcast.com!W&R x🎙️...
Beverley Hills to Butlin's in 24 hours... S5 E13
28 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The boys are back after a week off, EP13! Will's been to Florida, Ralf's been on the beers lots to chat about, def don't eat listening to this one (ag...
Modern Medicine - A Swift Half S5 E12
21 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
A slightly delayed 'Swift Half' due to the Easter Break and on this episode we somehow go from 'Salmon Jizz' to 'Modern Pharma' in the space of just 1...
Men are Weird - What Will William Tell? S5 E12
16 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This week Will has discovered a story that has inspired a new business idea /social experiment for Ralf. W&R xDon’t forget we’re out on Tour i...
A Girls Night In - S5 E12
14 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Ralf gets all the secrets from a 'Girls Night In', plus Potato Sandwiches, why Festivals are rubbish and Will is still wanging on about the Moon Landi...
Identity - Swift Half S5 E11
11 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Billy Bullsh*tter - What Will William Tell? S5 E11
09 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Two Blokes talking sh*t S5 E11
07 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
A Little bit of Devilment - A Swift Half S5 E10
04 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Brain Preservation and Metal Dicks - What Will William Tell? S5 E10.
02 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Monologues, Gremlins and Salmon Sperm. S5 E10
31 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Fear of the Dark - A Swift Half
28 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Luck and The Land of Dreams - What Will William Tell?
26 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Lick or Sniff - S5 E9
24 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Crypto Chaos - A Swift Half
21 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Elephants in Coats - What Will William Tell?
19 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Ralf Reveals All - S5 E8
17 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Gaffer Taping my Balls - A Swift Half
14 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's decision time for Will's plums.This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now where...
Smoke Up Your Arse - What Will William Tell
12 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We go a bit 'QI' on this episode with some tales about death, bells and arses!This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your ma...
The Method - S5 E7
10 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie. Download it now wherever you get your apps, for more inf...
A night out in the actual pub! A Swift Half
07 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Join us in the pub as we put LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, to the test, and trust us, it's a right laugh!Download it...
Too Much of a Good Thing - What Will William Tell
05 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Caramacs, Apple Pie, Orgasms....there is only so much you can have!Don’t forget we’re out on Tour in November….check out twopintspodcast.com for...
A Night at the Theatre - S5 E6
03 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is sponsored by LEBOM, an app where you bet against your mates, not the bookie, download it now wherever you get your apps, for more info...
Animals - A Swift Half S5 E5
28 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Another 'Swift Half' for a Friday and this week it's the problems of working with Animals...especially, as Will found out, Elephants! Don’t forget w...
Twins - What Will William Tell
26 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This week Will has found an amazing story about Co-joined Twins in America.Don’t forget we’re out on Tour in November….check out twopintspodcast...
Planes, Trains and .........Pocket Gardens
24 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We’re on a rant about the perils of travel, plus Will got very confused when we went on the One Show.Don’t forget we’re out on Tour in November…...
Brain Power - What Would William Tell... #2
19 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will has a story all about the strange ways our brains work. Plus what superpower would Ralf want?Two Pints Podcast November Nonsense is live www.twop...
Relationship Advice.... S5 E4
17 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Strap yourself in as we give you the relationship advice you never knew you needed! Plus Valentines Day, Parents finding your Porn stash and other emb...
Findabble....A Swift Half - S5 E3
14 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will gets a bit confused about a message on his phone, plus an unfortunate spelling of ‘Coconut’ and weird place names .TICKETS FOR OUR NOVEMBER N...
Scammers - What Will William Tell? #1
12 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We're giving you a new regular bonus episode to help you get through the mid week blues. This week Will gets on one about Scammers and Ralf has an ext...
You Asked, we delivered.... S5E3
10 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
NOVEMBER IS FOR NONSENSE.......We're going back out on the road..... All the information on our website.W&Rxx🎙️ live on a Monday,🍺 live on...
Stupid Questions - A Swift Half (S5 E2)
07 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
On this swift half we chat about the stupid questions we get asked and how we respond to them. W&Rxx🎙️ live on a Monday,🍺 live on a Friday...
Bananagate - Two Pints Podcast S5E2
03 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Will gets on one about Art.... a BANANA! We're back, again! and this season we're going to be a bit more regular 🎙️ live on a Monday,🍺 live on...