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The Unplanned Podcast with Matt & Abby

A messy conversation about divorce

21 Jan 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.031 - 1.974 Abby

People are just so quick to just be like, leave him.

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Chapter 2: What are the challenges of getting married before 25?

2.074 - 7.863 Matt

If I had a dollar for every comment or like on a comment for people that told you to leave me, I would have a lot of dollars.

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8.725 - 13.772 Abby

Getting married under the age of 25, you have a higher rate of divorce by up to 25%.

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13.933 - 18.279 Matt

We were children when we started dating. Yeah. But there's like pros and cons, right?

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18.339 - 20.222 Abby

Compromise wasn't exactly possible.

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20.262 - 23.688 Matt

That was like a hurdle in our relationship we had to overcome. And we did. We figured it out.

23.708 - 24.469 Abby

I got my way.

25.715 - 27.94 Matt

Are men or women more likely to cheat? Let me look that up.

28.02 - 28.301 Abby

Men.

Chapter 3: What are the most difficult periods of marriage?

28.642 - 29.043 Matt

Why men?

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29.103 - 31.508 Abby

Because they think with their pee-pee.

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31.688 - 53.221 Matt

What would you say has been the hardest season to grieve and let go of and recognize that part of our life is done? Hey, before we get started on today's episode, I wanted to ask you guys to just take a couple seconds of your time to leave a review for our podcast. It means the world to us. And if you're not subscribed to the show, if you wouldn't mind just tapping the subscribe button.

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53.401 - 71.009 Matt

Actually, the majority of the people that watch the show aren't even subscribed. According to the data, that's probably you watching this right now. So please, it takes one second. Hit subscribe. We'd love to have you part of this community. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Unplanned, a marriage and family podcast. And today we are talking about divorce.

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71.029 - 73.494 Matt

We're going to have an unfiltered, messy conversation about it.

Chapter 4: What are the largest indicators of divorce?

73.514 - 75.158 Abby

We're about marriage and divorce.

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75.178 - 82.013 Matt

Which is actually kind of funny because I had people submit some questions today and someone literally thought we were divorced, which is so sweet.

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Chapter 5: What are the most common reasons for divorce?

81.993 - 85.859 Abby

No, I feel like that's, I thought that, I was like, you're literally going to make it sound like we're getting divorced.

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85.879 - 93.091 Matt

We're not getting divorced, guys. We're just having a conversation about it, which I think is actually so important to have these conversations in marriage.

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Chapter 6: How do jobs impact divorce rates?

93.111 - 99.04 Matt

Because if you avoid uncomfortable conversations in your marriage, it's just going to grow like a disconnect between you.

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99.02 - 115.543 Abby

Okay, actually, I was like looking at what we had prepared for this episode. And the thing that surprised me the most, because I feel like we talk, gosh, we talk endlessly about young marriage. Apparently, getting married under the age of 25, you have a higher rate of divorce by up to 25%.

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115.523 - 129.506 Matt

Do you think that changes how we should advise our kids on marriage? Like if we have a kid that comes to us wanting to get married like we did when we were 19, are we going to encourage them to wait? Because then there's data that shows if you cohabitate, if you cohabitate, there's a likelihood that then you split up too.

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Chapter 7: What are the benefits of marriage?

129.726 - 133.633 Abby

We are saying that if you live together before you're married, you're more likely to get divorced.

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133.713 - 136.738 Matt

Yeah. That's what Arthur Brooks told us too. And there's research to support that.

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Chapter 8: What does 'Agree to Disagree' involve?

137.258 - 143.807 Abby

Um, I think it all boils down, maybe this just makes me sound like a hopeless romantic, but I think it just all boils down to when you meet your person.

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144.068 - 145.615 Matt

Yeah, you do sound like a hopeless romantic.

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146.86 - 148.222 Abby

Would you describe me as one?

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148.242 - 173.722 Matt

Well, here's the thing, babe. We got married freaking young, but we're also nearly a decade in almost seven years of marriage. This summer is seven years of marriage. And so we're clearly experts in the topic. I want to say it's probably... There's pros and cons, right? I feel like it's harder because we've changed so much because we were children when we started dating.

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173.802 - 174.403 Abby

Yeah.

174.383 - 177.693 Matt

But like, we also have grown up together.

177.713 - 185.457 Abby

I actually think the determining factor on whether or not you stay married boils down to whether or not you both are willing to work on it.

185.487 - 208.305 Abby

oh yeah that's good snaps like i'm snapping here's the thing you have to actually be willing to work on it because it's like and there's some i mean that that is some things you could maybe decide like i am not willing to work on this anymore yeah like that's valid but it's that's as simple as it's like are you willing to work on it yeah now there's the things that are like maybe you shouldn't work on this anymore like

208.623 - 231.441 Abby

you know what i mean i i honestly think that you kind of hit the nail on the head there and we pretty much can just end the podcast there thanks for tuning in everybody people have to be willing to like one person yeah i feel like a lot of times in these marriages where are like one person gives up one person is like i've been working i've been working on this for so long yeah and you're not putting any effort yeah so it's like what is the point anymore and i can see where you i mean

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