there are a ton of hurt people in our generation that decided to wreak havoc on others as a means of coping to what happened to them.it may have happened to you, but it doesn't mean you should inflict it onto other people. that isn't fair to them, and it isn't fair to you.being hurt is a two way street. taking accountability means true freedom.sending you all lots of love and peaaaaaaaaaaaace!https://stan.store/thezurkieshow
Full Episode
She broke me. She made me think that all women were going to treat me the way that she did. And so there's no point in dating. And the only thing I'm left to do is to be spiteful of any woman that ever comes into my life. But I learned that that was a flawed way of thinking. And I learned that the person who actually hurt me was me. And it always was me.
And that I will never, I will never let an individual instance and an individual experience basically define the way I see a whole gender, a whole group, a whole population of people. Because that's foolish. But she still hurt me. She still hurt me and I had to go to therapy and I had to realize that there were certain things that were not good. That were major red flags. But I ignored them.
Zerky Show, I ignored them. And so who hurt me? Who hurt you? I think the answer is both of you did. Both of you did. It's not a binary thing. Because I think hurt is a two-way street. And it's a little more nuanced than that, but in a lot of cases, there is someone who is hurting us and there is a part of us that is allowing ourselves to be hurt.
Whether that is the fact that we are naive, we don't know any better. Whether that's the fact that we kind of like it. I liked it. Getting hurt. I did. Because it was comfortable. Because I knew I always had a scapegoat. I always had somebody I could blame my problems on.
And what wasn't comfortable was realizing that I had to drop that kind of thinking if I wanted to go on with my life and live my life for myself. And when you actually have to acknowledge that like I am kind of letting this happen to me a little bit, it then makes you realize how many times you've allowed yourself to be hurt when you didn't need to. When you didn't need to. Who hurt you?
Who was it? Was it even the relationship or was it something before then? Was it something from childhood? Was it something you did that you felt embarrassed by or you were shamed for? Was it an instance where you got picked on? Was it an instance where you felt less than? Who hurt you?
It's such an important question to ask because we often look at the relationship first and we don't go backwards and think, where did this person...
basically get let in because it's not it's not right now it's probably years in the past my worst relationships came from the fact that I from a kid had to be a people pleaser there were certain family dynamics that basically made me a middleman and I had to I had to appease both sides for some of you that sounds pretty familiar There's a lot in that.
There's a lot in what goes on from your childhood or from your early adolescence that then dominoes into the rest of your life. And it does seep its way into relationships. It does. You don't want it to, but it does. And that's why you have to be conscious of it. And when I was hurt, when I was the most hurt, I had to basically, consciously...
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