#684 - Bad Haircut
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Why does Theo describe his haircut as the worst ever?
All um Fuck. I don't know how to you you ever just don't even know how to start the day or a sentence or A relationship or anything. Does he does anybody else ever d do you have that? I don't I just like Yeah, that's how it I'm just having that day. It's like I don't know Okay, yeah, yeah. Just yeah, I don't yeah, so So when you can't start something, it's kinda weird. You just kinda have to just like It's almost like if you were watching a a guy at a b bat batting at in a baseball game, he's in the batter's box and he just runs straight to second base. And people are like, Okay Then that's how it's gonna begin. So and that's how we're gonna begin today, guys. Uh Without a beginning. Cause that's where we are. Um, it is the year twenty twenty six.
Uh I got a bad haircut. Not sure if anybody Can even tell to be honest with you, I'll show it to you. You can see it. It's just You know. It it looks southern Amish, it's kinda I think it has kind of a southern Amish energy, which is you know. Yeah, it's like, oh you you know, you churn your own butter and you you churn your own sister, don't you? It's just like, you know, I think it can be alarming to people. It's alarming to me. That was it. And I think some people are like, Well, dude, your hair, you know Your hair generally looks like shit and that's fine, you know. But it's my it's like I don't know, the guy cut it away that I didn't want it. And so N just You know, I'm I'm okay if it looks like shit if it's the way I want it to look li if it's
I if as long as it's the way I want it to look like shit. You know, I'd set uh uh and he was a nice guy, right? But I'd said like I'd want a half inch off and the first thing he does is just rip two inches off of everywhere. And you're if you're a guy like me who d you know, does is Isn't overall familiar with a lot of inches. You notice when you su suddenly lose two of them bitches, dude. And so I was just like I was in New York City and you know, it's a time where I was like gonna be out and about and walking around and like Yeah, I just got into like just haircut shame, dude, and frustration. I felt like even the birds wouldn't look at me. Do you ever have like that? Were you just like, even the fucking birds won't even
Like even a stream, like if we're walking through a park, even the stream kind of flows the other way. It just like that's the effect it had on me. I just like I I'm okay if I look like shit. It just I wanna look like the type of shit that I want to look like. And it freaking pissed me off. It frickin' pissed me off, dude. And I don't get that angry much, but it pissed me off. And I just wanted to honestly do I just wanted to pull my wiener off and fucking And just Fucking just hum it into a into a crowd of people. Just fucking skip that bitch. You know how people skip it across a lake. I just wanted to just skip that bitch right off the top of a crowd. Just spink, bing, bink, bing. just hit a fucking bunch of people, even hit a fucking guy in a wheelchair or whatever.
I don't give a shit. That's how that's how I was feeling, dude. I don't care if it hits a f hits a fucking woman or a native American, I don't care. I don't care if or just somebody with braids. Let's just say that then. But I just I I don't know. It just like I don't know. Now I'm feeling upset that I'm upset, but So I but for like a week I was just dealing with like haircut shame, you know. And sometimes when I get angry, I wish my w cause like all my Like my angst, it just somehow it end there's this feeling and I wanna detach this sounds crazy, but I wanna detach my wiener and just hum that bitch out into a chorus or a crowd of people just singing in the street. And one of them just gets they get clipped right in the jaw with it.
And they're like, What was that? Like, that's a D sharp bitch, okay? Get on tune, cu.
You just wanna throw your wien I don't know why my wien I just wanna throw my wiener at somebody. Yeah, and I'm sorry if I and I'm sorry if that's offending some P or I don't f I don't care today, dude. I do not care today. I do care, but
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
Why does Theo describe his haircut as the worst ever?
0:01–11:54
2
What went wrong on the broken‑down camper road trip?
11:54–22:59
3
How does Theo react to the Macklemore/Gaza controversy?
22:59–34:40
4
What advice does Theo give to Jamie about supporting his middle‑schooler?
34:40–46:15
5
Is it ever okay to break into a house to steal a religious artifact?
46:15–58:23
6
How does Rick stay sober while dealing with cancer and family stress?
58:23–1:07:15
7
What coping strategies does Theo share for feeling overwhelmed?
1:07:15–1:11:47