The “Girl You Don’t Need to Worry About” Problem

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U Up? 1h 22m 3 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 4 months ago
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Is it normal for partners to try breast milk?

Jordana Abraham 0:02
Hello and welcome back to the UL Podcast. I'm Jordana Abraham.
Jared Freed 0:06
And I am Jared Freed. It is so good to be back here with you, Jordana. How are you? What's going on?
Jordana Abraham 0:13
I am good. I was very confused this morning because I took the Long Island Railroad and there were like, this is like the peak commute time, and there were like a ton of kids on the train.
Jared Freed 0:24
Okay.
Jordana Abraham 0:25
And Mike was like, why are all these kids here? I don't really understand. And then we Googled it.
Jared Freed 0:31
Why are children on the train?
Jordana Abraham 0:32
How do you Google? Like, what is today something?

What should I do if my partner helps a coworker who makes me uncomfortable?

Jordana Abraham 0:35
Or, like, whatever. I don't know. He Googled it, and he was like, apparently it's take your kid to work day. Oh, my God. Right? Which used to be take your daughter to work day, but I think now they changed it to take your child to work day.
Jared Freed 0:47
So all these little kids, what, like, have their, like, suits on and professor glasses and, like, briefcases? Basically. Yeah, they're on the train with their parents. It seems like that's the worst version of a day off from work.
Jordana Abraham 1:00
Oh, yeah.
Jared Freed 1:00
You still have to go.
Jordana Abraham 1:01
You have your kid.
Jared Freed 1:03
You can't really work. But you also can't really say no.

How do I handle love bombing and sudden changes in plans?

Jared Freed 1:07
Right.
Jordana Abraham 1:08
Yeah.
Jared Freed 1:08
I would say no. You would say no. You wouldn't do it. To me, this is one of those things. I got bad feedback from my take on paternity leave. But this is another thing that I'm like... a little bit old man-ish on. Did you ever go with your dad?
Jordana Abraham 1:23
No, stay the fuck home. I gotta go to work. Did your dad ever take you to work? Maybe, yeah. When we were kids, it was take your daughter to work day to get women in the workforce.

Is saying 'I'm bored' in a long-term relationship rude or honest?

Jordana Abraham 1:30
Now we're here enough. We did it. Yeah, we did it. We're good. We don't need to do that.
Jared Freed 1:36
The whole issue's solved.
Jordana Abraham 1:37
You never went?
Jared Freed 1:39
I'm sure I did. I just don't remember it being take your kid to work day reasoning.
Jordana Abraham 1:45
Right. It was more just like I need to stop by somewhere to go.
Jared Freed 1:50
Yeah. I went to my dad's work. Did you go to your dad's work? Did you go to your mom's work?

When is it okay to tell a date I'm attracted to someone else?

Jared Freed 1:54
Yeah, I did.
Jordana Abraham 1:55
I went to his office. I mean, I used to work in my mom's office.
Jared Freed 2:00
You'd be like what? Like the secretary?
Jordana Abraham 2:02
No. My grandma was actually the secretary in my mom's office. Wow.
Jared Freed 2:06
That must have been quite a gynecological experience. To walk in and have your mom be the doctor and the grandma who's like... A family business. And they're talking to each other like they're having grandma-mom fights.
Jordana Abraham 2:21
Oh, my grandma would be yelling at my mom. She'd be like, Patience, you've got patients in the room. Stop being on your phone.
Jared Freed 2:28
Actually, my grandma was... The most stressful...

How can I navigate dating that feels like a job interview?

Jared Freed 2:32
Like you're in there like, I gotta get a pap smear. Oh my God, this is gonna be a horrible day. And then like, you got patients. Yeah. Get over here. You're always late.
Unknown 2:41
Look what you wore today.
Jordana Abraham 2:42
Lisa, people in the room, let's keep going.
Jared Freed 2:45
I love how much I knew exactly how horrific this would be for the patient.
Jordana Abraham 2:50
This is pre-Yelp reviews, pre... Thank God, because I don't think they would have been great. My grandma was one of the scariest women that ever lived. I loved her. She's very funny, no bullshit. Right. But she was very cutthroat in that way.

What advice should I follow when dealing with jealousy in relationships?

Jordana Abraham 3:09
And she managed the office. She managed all the finances. And she was obsessed with the Holocaust. So she used to play Schindler's List in the waiting room. And my mom would be like, mom, I think, you know, like maybe we could, you know, make something a little bit more like neutral, pleasant. She'd be like, they need to know.
Jared Freed 3:29
How about Friday the 13th?
Jordana Abraham 3:30
Let's put on like a horror movie.
Jared Freed 3:33
That'd be a little bit better.
Jordana Abraham 3:34
Yeah. That's crazy. That's what I'm saying. She did not, there was no.
Jared Freed 3:39
Well, it's funny on the, on the subject of like kind of over corrections, like take your daughter to work day. Then we're like, we're done.

How do I assess if a comment about attraction is a red flag?

Jared Freed 3:45
We got to do take your kid to work day. it's similar to this where like someone's like, I hated going to the doctor. Like, like growing up it was like the most horrific experience of my life and yeah of course it was it was some mom and daughter duo screaming at each other the magazines are old like and then they're like well now you can just do it from home and like you know these web therapy sessions you're like well i still kind of want to leave the house how about we just not have an 80 year old woman yelling at her adult child who's your doctor

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