Untoxicated Podcast

Ep352 – Sexual Consent and Emotional Intimacy with Amanda Dames

15 Jun 2026

Contributed by Lukas

When asked about the impact on a relationship when an intoxicated partner begs for or demands sex, and the coercion works because the drinker’s ...

Ep351 – Benefits of Emotional Safety for the Recipient and Provider

08 Jun 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Sheri and Matt have covered the ways emotional safety improves relationship dynamic for the person on the receiving end: nervous system regulation, pe...

Requisite

04 Jun 2026

Contributed by Lukas

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addict...

Ep350 – Jane is Lifting Heavy Things to Deal with Heavy Things

01 Jun 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Jane is an Echoes of Recovery OG who taught us to call our growth and healing work, “Discovery,” because there is no going back. After six...

Exorcising the “F” Word

28 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addict...

Ep349 – Emotional Safety and Raising Kids

25 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

When it comes to parenting, there is no shortage of generational trauma cycle breaking to be addressed. Sheri and Matt talk about the two-generation c...

Humans. Am I Right?

21 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addict...

Ep348 – Ask Lara for Her BEST Relationship Advice

18 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Lara Hammock is back for another quarterly segment full of probing questions and thoughtful, helpful, well illustrated advice! Lara is a mental health...

This Is Why She Doesn’t Trust You

14 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addict...

Ep347 – I Don’t Want to NEED to Be Strong

11 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

It is not the compliment you think it is when you tell the partner of a heavy drinker how strong she is. And when you tell her that you’ll help ...

Never Quite Measuring Up

07 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “Never Quite Measuring Up” I did the math in my head. If the sales revenue generated on the opening d...

Ep346 – Relapse and Divorce with Kim Augustus

04 May 2026

Contributed by Lukas

On Untoxicated Podcast Ep206, Kim Augustus thought her family had made it out of alcoholism and into solid recovery. In this next chapter, Kim’s...

Big Birthday Revolution

30 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

My dad’s birthday was a couple of weeks ago. I didn’t send him a card. I called him on his birthday, but I got his voicemail, so I left a message....

Ep345 – ADHD and Alcoholism with Annette and Jason

27 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

For Jason, alcohol provided clarity for his fuzzy thoughts and lack of clarity. His medicinal drinking helped him thrive at work. But his drinking cau...

Rose, part two

23 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “Rose, part two” Confused about the sources of her anxiety, and incapable of confronting Chris for th...

Ep344 – Be a Happier Parent with Alex Trippier

20 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Does the distribution of household workload cause stress in your relationship? Are your parenting roles unclear as women excel in the workforce and me...

Rose, part one

16 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “Rose, part one” He took a cube of cheese right out of Rose’s mouth. It was the move a parent makes...

Ep343 – The Five Love Languages with Monica Tanner

13 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

“You know my love language is physical touch, and yet you withhold sex, and that’s why I drink.” Relationship and Sex Therapist Moni...

She IS Stuck in the Past

09 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “She IS Stuck in the Past” “You said we would only be there for a little while. A couple of beers, ...

Ep342 – Divorce Like a Boss with Diana

06 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Diana Romanov practices family law in California, and she believes in client education and harnessing the power of technology to partner with her clie...

Jen, part two

02 Apr 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “Jen, part two” (Click here to listen to part one.) Old academic papers on the impact of alcoholism o...

Ep341 – Embracing Emotional Masculinity with Hammer

30 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Mike Hamm is the partner of a drinker in recovery. He really relates to many of Sheri’s experiences. As a man, he also shares struggles with Mat...

Jen, part one

26 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “Jen, part one” Mindfuckery. That’s how she described the cognitive dissonance of sitting in the wa...

Ep340 – Dual Diagnosis: What’s Behind the Alcohol?

23 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Dual Diagnosis is a medical term for when someone experiences a substance use disorder and a co-occurring mental health concern. Sheri and Matt expand...

It Won’t Matter

18 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: “It Won’t Matter” I wish I could deliver a message to my younger self. Many messages, really, to...

Ep339 – Watch Your Mouth

16 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Are you an alcoholic, or are you a gray-area drinker? Are you avoiding confrontation, or do you have topics that you might find benefits from addressi...

The Family Scar

12 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from the Evolution Series from our Untoxicated blog: “The Family Scar” Before they served us our farewell dinner, our ne...

Ep338 – Relief

09 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Sheri and Matt explain the relief that the partners of drinkers experience in different scenarios as relationship status and possibly drinking status ...

Evolution Series: Consequences of Confrontation

05 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from the Evolution Series from our Untoxicated blog: Consequences of Confrontation Confrontation has long been hard for me, and I hav...

Ep337 – From Surviving to Thriving with Jen

02 Mar 2026

Contributed by Lukas

This is one of the most extreme cases of an incredibly normal experience. What started for Jen as social drinking with a new boyfriend eventually buil...

Enough

26 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Our latest essay from our Untoxicated blog: Enough Is having enough about getting more or needing less? I was at a casual lunch meeting with six peop...

Ep336 – Ask Lara

23 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

In this quarterly session with licensed clinical social worker and mental health therapist, Lara Hammock, Sheri and Matt ask Lara listener questions a...

Sober and Unashamed: Shameful Awakening

19 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Shameful Awakening” We hope you will engage. Please read and leave a comment about where you are in your process o...

Ep335 – Midwest Resentment Stuffing

16 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Trigger warning: Epstein and power addiction (to skip graphic discussion, please go to 17:45). Do you recognize this cycle: Conflict, huffiness, a per...

Sober and Unashamed: Catastrophism

12 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Catastrophism” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, ...

Ep334 – Intimacy Coaching with Dan Purcell

09 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Dan Purcell is an intimacy coach and the host of the Get Your Marriage On! podcast. Sheri and Matt ask Dan about taboo subjects around sexuality, saf...

Sober and Unashamed: Soft Pillows

05 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Soft Pillows” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, g...

Ep333 – Dueling Instincts: Self Care or Nurturing

02 Feb 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Sheri talks about breaking free from an instinctual and conditioned compulsion to prioritize Matt’s needs over hers. Her transformation has not ...

Sober and Unashamed: Cold Hands

29 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Cold Hands” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, gro...

Ep332 – No More Wasted Days with Sara

26 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Sara Kaufman-Bradstreet got sober, along with her husband, six years ago, and she talks with Sheri and Matt about triggers, parenting, the alcoholic l...

Sober and Unashamed: And I Thought Alcohol Addiction Was Dangerous

22 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “And I Thought Alcohol Addiction Was Dangerous” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex a...

Ep331 – Alcohol has No Relationship Value with Amy Lombardi

19 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

In her 25 years as a couples therapist, Amy Lombardi, LPC, has worked with thousands of people, and can think of zero clients for whom alcohol has enh...

Ep330 – Dating After Alcoholism Roundtable

12 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Kelly, Melanie, and Tess make a return visit to the podcast, this time to share their hard-earned wisdom about their pitfalls and successes in navigat...

Sober and Unashamed: Million-Dollar Endorsement

08 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Million-Dollar Endorsement” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underl...

Ep329 – 10 Forms of Emotional Abuse

05 Jan 2026

Contributed by Lukas

Emotional abuse doesn’t leave visible bruises. Emotional abuse is always one weak apology away from being brushed under the rug. But trust and p...

Sober and Unashamed: The Cruelty of Addiction

31 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “The Cruelty of Addiction” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlyin...

Ep328 – Lingering Holiday Trauma Post Alcohol

29 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this second episode of a two-part series, Sheri and Matt talk about how anxiety, depression, and nervous system activation continued into the first...

Sober and Unashamed: Evolution Series – Christmas Card

24 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Kelly from the Evolution Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Christmas Card” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, se...

Ep327 – Impact of Holidays and Alcohol

22 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this first episode in a two-part series about the impact of alcohol and the holidays, Sheri and Matt tell stories of Matt’s active addiction,...

Sober and Unashamed: Elephant Around the Christmas Tree

18 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Elephant Around the Christmas Tree” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy...

Ep326 – Becoming Our Own Worst Enemies

15 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It is widely believed that we are harder on ourselves than anyone else will ever be on us. How did we get this way? Is the societal conditioning diffe...

Sober and Unashamed: Parents Crushing Kids’ Emotional Grit

11 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Parents Crushing Kids’ Emotional Grit” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and...

Ep325 – Addiction Tsunami

08 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Addiction is a spectrum disorder, and the overwhelming abundance of access to dopamine in our culture means awareness is our only hope. Listen to help...

Sober and Unashamed: Masculinity that’s NOT Toxic

04 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Masculinity that’s NOT Toxic” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy...

Ep324 – Study Results: Kindness and Emotional Safety Top the List

01 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The results are in! More than physical features, more than financial resources, people are looking for Kindness and Emotional Safety in potential part...

Sober and Unashamed: 3 Things I Love about Friendsgiving

27 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “3 Things I Love about Friendsgiving” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and inti...

Ep323 – The Cost of Marriage

24 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It is easy to calculate the costs associated with dissolving a relationship, but when people fight to stay together, they often fail to analyze the co...

Sober and Unashamed: Emotional Safety is a Dying Fad

20 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Emotional Safety is a Dying Fad” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy...

Ep322 – Ask Lara

17 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Introducing our new quarterly series with listener questions answered by Lara Hammock, licenced clinical social worker and mental health therapist wor...

Sober and Unashamed: I Wish She Would Die

13 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “I Wish She Would Die” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlyin...

Ep321 – The Complexity of Grieving

10 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Humans are complicated, and when we lose someone, or separate from someone, we have to reconcile the good memories and the bad. Yes, there is relief t...

Ep320 – Finding My Voice in Recovery

03 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

"I made myself small to cope." This is a sentiment expressed by the loved ones of alcoholics who get used to walking on egg shells, and also the alcoh...

Sober and Unashamed: Atrophied Intelligence

30 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Atrophied Intelligence” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underly...

Ep319 – Love is Not Enough: 11 Dysfunctional Reasons Couples Stay Together

27 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

When relationships deteriorate, as frequently happens in an alcoholic marriage, partners often stay together clinging to the romantic fairytale or bec...

Sober and Unashamed: The Divorce Rate is Too Low

23 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “The Divorce Rate is Too Low” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, un...

Ep318 – Evolving Masculine Instincts

20 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In order for relationships to evolve to meet the demands of consistent emotional safety, many of us need to first understand the assignment. On this e...

Sober and Unashamed: Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 2

16 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 2” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimac...

Ep317 – Sex is Not an Entitlement

13 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Sex in a committed partnership should never be considered obligatory. Sex should be earned, and on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the sequence o...

Sober and Unashamed: Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 1

09 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 1” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimac...

Ep316 – Partner Abuse with Lundy Bancroft

06 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Lundy Bancroft is the author of the world's best selling book on domestic violence titled, "Why Does He Do That?" He has spent the last three decades ...

Sober and Unashamed: Progress

02 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Progress” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, gr...

Ep315 – Emotional Masculinity

29 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Our society has changed dramatically in the last century, and the gender gap has been almost completely eliminated. But our culture still has some cat...

Sober and Unashamed: Yummy Summer of Turd

25 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Yummy Summer of Turd” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlyin...

Ep314 – Pressure that’s Crushing Our Kids

22 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

From high school through young adulthood, the pressure felt by people in their teens and 20s is unlike anything experienced by preceding generations. ...

Sober and Unashamed: Rubber Stamping a Toxic Culture

18 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Rubber Stamping a Toxic Culture” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy...

Ep313 – Blame Assigned or Blame Prevented

15 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

There is comfort in assigning the blame for relationship dysfunction and emotional abuse on the alcohol or the addiction. But what if we could make a ...

Sober and Unashamed: Senseless Urgency

11 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Senseless Urgency” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying i...

Ep312 – Complain Constructively with Lara Hammock

08 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Lara Hammock is a licenced clinical social worker and mental health therapist working with both individuals and couples. She is creative and inventive...

Sober and Unashamed: A.B.D.

04 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “A.B.D.” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, grow...

Ep311 – Restriction Leads to Rebellion

01 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Even when done with loving intent, restriction and control does not lead to the desired results of obedience and conformity: restriction leads to rebe...

Sober and Unashamed: Good Morning, Gorgeous

28 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Good Morning, Gorgeous” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underly...

Ep310 – Questions for Sheri, Part 2

25 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Sheri answers listener questions about everything from her rock-bottom moments that resulted from Matt's alcoholism, to what she would do differently ...

Sober and Unashamed: Dudes on the Struggle Bus

21 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Dudes on the Struggle Bus” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, unde...

Ep309 – Evolution and the Impact of Men’s Sexual Power

18 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Evolutionary Psychologist Dr. Menelaos Apostolou does research around this unfortunate historical fact: Until sometime in the past 100 years, men had ...

Sober and Unashamed: Courtesy Flush

14 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Courtesy Flush” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issue...

Ep308 – We’re Not Rooting for Divorce, We’re Rooting for You

11 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We're not rooting for divorce, we are rooting for people to be treated with respect. And in the absence of respect, we are rooting for people to extra...

Sober and Unashamed: (Un)Lone Bone

07 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “(Un)Lone Bone” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, se...

Ep307 – Fear of Resentment Processing

04 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Maybe people don't need more instruction about how to do resentment processing. What people need is an acknowledgement of their fear of resentment pro...

Sober and Unashamed: Bitch

31 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Bitch” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and in...

Ep306 – A Unique Recovery Approach with Amber Hollingsworth

28 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Amber Hollingsworth makes her fourth appearance on the podcast to talk about how she developed her innovative approach to addiction recovery that invo...

Soberlink Endorsement from Amber Hollingsworth

25 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Amber Hollingsworth is a licensed addiction counselor who has been working with individuals and families struggling with addiction since 2004. She hos...

Sober and Unashamed: Marriage Rash

24 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Marriage Rash” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, se...

Ep305 – From Stubborn to Support

21 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

"There's always a but when you're dealing with an ass." Sheri explains Matt's reluctance to seek sobriety support for his active alcoholism. If you he...

Sober and Unashamed: Keep My Food Out of Your Mouth

17 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Keep My Food Out of Your Mouth” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholi...

Ep304 – Putting Confidence into Action Roundtable

14 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Live from the 2025 Echoes of Recovery retreat along Bear Creek in the Rocky Mountains our roundtable discusses the challenges of putting their confide...

Sober and Unashamed: Do You See What I See?

10 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Do You See What I See?” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underly...

Ep303 – Questions for Sheri

07 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Unfiltered and unprepped, Sheri answers a wide range of emotional and tactical questions about how she navigated Matt's alcoholism and sobriety, and w...

Sober and Unashamed: Insignificance

03 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Insignificance” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, unde...

Ep302 – Breathing Room Roundtable

30 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We talked about the decision to stay or to go on Ep69. Ep214 and 217 were both roundtable episodes with people who had separated and divorced. On the ...

Ep301 – Foreplay in Alcoholism Recovery

23 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Foreplay is often thought of as erotic touch intended for sexual stimulation. Sheri and Matt have conducted research with thirteen couples recovering ...