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Chapter 1: What causes panic attacks and how can they be managed?
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Everything here is spontaneous, real, and genuine. Just honest conversations about what it means to be alive. I'm Javier Chicharito Hernandez, and listen to Learning to be Human on iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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Chapter 2: How does anxiety manifest in personal relationships?
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Accutane? Which is literally like, do not drink alcohol. Your liver will be fucked. Are you out of your mind? That's crazy. Yeah, that's called an addict. It's called an addict. So then once I got sober, I was like, I don't know that I need this medication anymore because I think that my anxiety and depression was coming from drinking excessively.
I have not been on medication since then. Everything was very, very manageable because my whole thing is... if it's manageable, like we all have emotions and we can work through them. I'm not telling anyone what to do. Don't drop your medication. For me, that's what I felt was best. And then all of the sudden in the past year, I have just felt like I have an elephant on my chest.
I'm like, I'm going to die. Like, I feel like this is how I die. Yes. Yes. So I'm not on a medication, but I do beta block. So you never experienced anxiety when you were younger? Like as a child? Yeah. I'm sure that I did, but I feel like it was situational anxiety. Like a test is coming that gives me anxiety. Right, right. You know, it wasn't just like waking up and feeling it.
But I also feel like it's a hormonal thing. Cause I'm like, why am I not sleeping? Like I slept in high school. I could sleep until 10, 10 a.m. Straight cruising. I could stay in bed and not feel guilty about it at all. No, I know. And now I'm like, what happened? It's like, well, life, because you're a grown adult who can't just hang out in the bed until one.
Yeah, no, I feel also too with my kids being older, I feel this extra pressure not to show them when I'm dysregulated as a human, which my kids have seen me cry a handful of times, like mom's upset or, you know, they'll just like see me in my room and I'll just say like, I need a minute. But... They feel that stuff. And so now it's like that extra pressure of not to be anxious around them.
Right. Do you think that that's a good or a bad thing? Like there are times where I go back and forth where I'm like, my kids need to see someone who's strong. But then on the flip side, they're going to get older and experience those emotions too. And if they have nothing to kind of relate it to.
Yeah.
Where they can go, oh, like this is what happens when you get older and there's pressures. Like I've seen my mom, like my biggest thing when I look back is there were moments where I saw my parents argue. But the important part that I took with me was that I saw them make up their mind. Right?
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Chapter 3: What are the signs of a codependent relationship?
Yeah. So nothing in my house was really hidden. If my mom was fucking mad at my dad, like the whole house was going to fucking know about it. Oh my gosh, 100%. Now, depending on who you ask, it's like you don't do that in front of the kids. You do it behind closed doors. But then when your child gets older and they're like, wait, arguments happen? I've never experienced this before.
It's like, yeah, arguments happen. How are you going to deal with it? Well, I saw my parents make up, so. Yeah, as long as people aren't like chucking shit across the room. You know what I mean? Do you find that anxiety, when it shows up, it shows up in your relationships or when you date someone? Since I have started putting myself out there with men, my peace has been so disrupted.
Which, by the way, is my own problem. That's my own issue. Obviously, when you're putting yourself out there and your heart... you're going to have moments where you're not at ease, right? But I have to be able to deal with that. Like there was a period of time where I could not even be mentally present with my children. It was like a week straight where I was with them, but I was not with them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were in their head. Yes. And then I get angry at the person. I'm like, it's not their problem. This is me. I am in full control. I can't control you. I can control me. But usually I would say that's never going to happen again. I'll date when my kids are older. I'm not putting myself out there because it's not worth it.
Now I'm understanding that I have to go out into the world and put the tools that I've been working on to use. You have to. Otherwise, all of the tools that I have are going to be shiny and pretty and they will have never been used. Just like I must continue to put myself out there and learn from each experience.
But the guy who caused all of this, Amber told me last night, because it's been a back and forth. And she goes, is he still in your phone? And I was like, no, I deleted his contact. And she goes, no, you need to block him. He should not be allowed to contact you any longer. All night long, I tossed and turned. I was having dreams about him doing shitty fucking things.
And this morning I literally woke up before my alarm went off and I was like, I am blocking him in every aspect. I never want him to contact me again. I walked into our workout today. so mentally free. I feel like I cut the cord. Woo. Yes.
It felt so good.
I was like, why do I feel like I just like threw up and shit everywhere and feel awesome. So light. Yeah. It's the best feeling in the world. It is the best. You know what anxiety is? Someone told me this recently, which I love the anticipation of suffering. Oh, that's brutal. And it's true. Wow.
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Chapter 4: How do personal experiences shape our understanding of anxiety?
Like I'm the opposite. Like you tell me like, no, you can't have that. I'm like, watch motherfucker. I'm going to get it. Yeah. But that, that 2008 recession, it was very hard to get. I mean, everybody like tightened the what purse strings. Is that what they, it was intense. And what's sad is I didn't even experience it the way most people did. Like my mom's parents had passed away.
She got inheritance that we lived off of. My mom continued to go to work. But I mean, in that moment, I watched my dad's health decline significantly. We lost him at the age of 64. Yeah, it's stress. It was the stress of just that time on, everything had changed. Do you ever find yourself in positions where...
you're in high pressure moments and you actually are able to use your anxiety to actually perform better in like a positive way. What's wild is my personal stressors in personal life, dealing with men. Those moments take me out mentally more than high pressure in like a business setting.
Like when I feel that pressure, I'm like firing off text messages, making phone calls, harassing people, like making sure yesterday.
Yeah.
Hi. Yeah. Let's fucking go. There's money in the world. I've seen it. I wonder what the difference is and how you can, when I say you, I meant the universal you, like how do you navigate that? Like how do you flip that narrative where like in personal, because I guess business wise, it doesn't, it doesn't hit your heart. Whereas when it's romantic relationships, it hits your heart. Right.
Which my heart has not been exercised in a very long time. Yeah. It takes practice. A lot of practice. Yeah. Because even with our ex, my heart was invested in ocean, nothing else. So even that was a different kind of heartache. Mm-hmm.
Heartache when it comes to I'm giving myself intimately and mentally fit all of the things as well as my friendship to a man, that part of me has not been exercised, used in probably 10 years.
Mm-hmm.
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Chapter 5: What coping mechanisms do people use for anxiety?
They would close the door and I'm like, let me off of this plane. It's like the oxygen for me is being sucked out of the air. I get dizzy. Is it because you think something's going to happen? It's, I can't, I feel claustrophobic. I'm extremely claustrophobic. And so when they're, when it's hot and there's a lot of people and I feel like there's no place to escape. Like I can't run off this plane.
Like I'm stuck here. Oh God, you're giving me a whole set of new anxieties. I never even think that way. I'm like, if there's a little turbulence, put me right to bed. The turbulence doesn't always bother me. But when I fly into Denver, which is a complete bitch, the turbulence is like, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.
No. And then you're like sliding.
You're like on a slip and slide on a plane. You're like, oh, shit. Like, I really hope those guys up there know what they're doing. You hope he's like a sully.
Like he's fucking landing on the Hudson.
I hope he's fucking awake and sobering. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotb, host of the podcast Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb. Okay, if you know me, you know this. I'm always searching for inspiration, for support, and useful tools to help maximize joy. So this podcast lets us uncover all of that together.
We're going to have these meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people, like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges that she never saw coming. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartum depression.
I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Olympic champ Shawn Johnson revealed why she had no choice but to be a gymnast. There was something about gymnastics that was intoxicating to me. It's given me a belief that we all have one of those treasures inside of us. We just have to find it. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
My first guest is Paris Hilton, Shakira, Luke and Yerin, Samira and Gracie. I'm so excited. On the bouncy bed.
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Chapter 6: How do medications affect anxiety and depression?
Love it. Meds. Meds. Yeah. Working out. The best. The best.
I just can't get there.
But working out and breathing. You got it like. It forces you to breathe. It always comes back to the breathing. This person says my vibrator. Yeah, that's true. I've noticed that lately. Well, if I'm having a panic attack and I'm numb from the waist down, there's nothing that's going to do. No, but if you're having a bit of anxiety, like it's like having a migraine.
Have you ever had a migraine and then had sex and then you have an orgasm? It goes away in two seconds. I've never been with anyone. No one's been next to me when I've been fighting a migraine. And usually I just want a dark room, silence and a heating pad. No, but it does work. Don't even get me started on vibrators. My drawer, I just got like 10 new ones. My drawer is filled to the brim.
Oh my gosh. I probably have them, unless maybe sex workers have more of a full drawer. No, why would they have, why would a sex worker? Just fun toys. You can use them on men. Oh. And men can use them on you. Like it's fun to throw in a little toy. No? I've never done it. Amber, with all the sex you have, you've never used toys? How dare you say that about me? All right. Not a bad thing.
It's a good thing. Not taboo. I have not had a lot of sex. Having lots of sex is good. I have not had a lot of sex, but I've experienced different partners over the last three years, and I've never used a toy. Okay. I've had a lot of sex and I've used a lot of toys and not used a lot of toys. And you prefer using toys. I just think having toys is fun, whether you're solo or with somebody.
Because also when you're with someone multiple times, like you don't just want to be doing, I don't know. I don't know. Just a little fun. No? Yeah. She's looking at me like I'm weird. No, I'm not. I just have never experienced that. So let me try. This is the difference between fucking 26-year-olds and not. You know, you got to teach him some things. All right. All right. Well. Microdosing.
How do you say this word? Psilocybin? Psychedelics. It's a psychedelic compound found in over 200 species of fungi commonly referred to as magic mushrooms. I've heard this works. I have too, and I'm not mad about it. And to be honest- I think I would rather, even in my sobriety, have someone give me micro-dosing mushrooms over that. I agree. I agree with you. I agree. Actually, I agree.
I really think that that is a good option. Prozac. Prozac. That takes away your sex drive big time. I've been on that. Okay. I scream. You go for it.
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Chapter 7: What are effective techniques for managing anxiety in daily life?
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Everyone sees me as a football player, but before anything else, I'm human.
Every single day, I'm still learning how to live with problems, mistakes, relationships, emotions, ever since I was born. And I still have so many questions. Where do we come from?
What happens after death? How do you deal with cancellation, Cristiano or Messi? Do aliens exist? What is love? Real Madrid or Barca, from everyday and ordinary to the deep and extraordinary. This isn't a normal podcast. Everything here is spontaneous, real and genuine.
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Chapter 8: How can breathing techniques help with anxiety relief?
Everything here is spontaneous, real, and genuine. Just honest conversations about what it means to be alive. I'm Javier Chicharito Hernandez, and listen to Learning to be Human on iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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