Valuetainment
“The Happiness Formula” - Longevity Doctor REVEALS Why Money Won’t Make You Happy
19 Feb 2026
Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: How does a negative upbringing impact happiness?
I came from a very low income, nobody was winning, family, divorce, finances, we had nothing, you know, food stamps. My dad was a cashier at a 99 cent store and I read a book called The Genius in All of Us that said, you know, the average low income kid is raised in a family that is rejected 600,000 times from 0 to 18 years old, more negative affirming than positive affirming.
Then it was middle class was 100,000 more negative than positive, and then upper class was 100,000 more positive than negative, right? So you have to reaffirm yourself to beliefs of power of positive thinking, and you read these types of books to kind of elevate yourself and read the right affirmations. How does one...
goal, if you're raised in an environment that there's so much negativity around, ah, that'll never happen to us, oh, we don't have a chance there, and you want to make it out of that environment, how does one do it?
Yeah, so, I mean, that, obviously, I'm not a psychologist, so I wouldn't say that I'm the right person to really answer this question. You would probably talk to someone like Dr. Arthur Books. By the way, you should.
Chapter 2: What role do affirmations play in overcoming negativity?
He's amazing.
Yeah, I read his book, The Road to Freedom.
The Road to Freedom.
I don't know if you've read it or not.
I haven't. 2012. I skimmed both books.
I couldn't put it down, Road to Freedom. When it came out, I told everybody in my office, you guys got to read it. Phenomenal book.
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Chapter 3: Why is purpose more important than money for happiness?
Please continue.
You know, so, I mean, I think there's, people respond differently to that type of negative, like you were talking about negative background where you're never going to be able to achieve something or like it's a very, what's the term for it? Where you basically, it's like you're defeated, you know, where you're just constantly defeated and it's almost like this self-fulfilling prophecy, right?
I think that it depends on, You know, you have to kind of like train yourself to like realize that you actually can do things. And I don't know if it's an affirmation you do every day. Exercise is something that also helps with that. I think positive thinking where it helps you kind of just get out of that negative thinking where it's not going to work out.
But you also have to realize that worshiping things like power or money or or fame, I mean, these things are also trying to fulfill a void, that happiness void, right? So like, there's plenty of people that are very successful, very wealthy, very powerful that are not happy. You're right. Why is that, right? Because it doesn't bring happiness. It doesn't bring happiness.
And I think that most of us out there that do know people like this, or we see like, look at Hollywood actors. I mean, their marriages are constantly breaking apart, right? I mean, they're wealthy, they're famous. They have, by anyone's standards, would think, oh, they have everything. But there's always this treadmill of it's not good enough.
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Chapter 4: How does reflecting on mortality influence life choices?
It's not good enough. I need more. I need more. And it's a very, it's a slippery slope to get on that, you know, that, that treadmill of, let's say you start to get some success, but then you're comparing yourself to everyone else. Then you need more. And so you're not happy because you're not getting those things.
And I think that's what comes back to, you know, those macronutrients of happiness that Dr. Arthur books talk about where it's, it's the, it's the enjoyment in the relationships, It's the sense of purpose. Like, what is it? You have to have that sense of purpose. Are you a mother? Are you someone like me who I love helping and educating people to live healthier?
I feel like that's a purpose, my sense of purpose. And you have to have satisfaction, right? Satisfaction of doing something, accomplishing it. Whether it's a 10-minute workout in the morning, you know, whether it's reading a book, you know, finishing reading it, whatever it is, you have to have the satisfaction of doing that challenging thing.
And all these things help you maintain happiness and have happiness. And I think that's...
I love it. Yeah.
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Chapter 5: What are the key components of long-term fulfillment?
You know, in 2008, when the market crash happened the next year in 08, 09, I don't know what the study was. There was more books. They measured what word it was. Every, there was more books, 2000 plus copies, I believe where the word happy or happiness was in it. Cause everybody wanted to find out how to be happy. So think about this run that we have, man. I just want to be happy.
And then you realize, you know, even happiness is temporary. It's fulfillment. It's what am I doing that there's a deeper purpose to what I'm doing. The deeper part, you know, you go through the survival phase. I'm just trying to pay my bills. Then maybe you get some status or look at me. I'm a doctor. I'm a professor. I'm a I'm an entrepreneur. I'm making six figures. I got an MBA.
I got a master's. I got 100,000 followers on Twitter. I'm somebody. Then you go to, you know what? I want to be free. Then you're free. You have some money in the bank. Then you're like, now what do I want to do? And then eventually it comes back to what you were talking about, the purpose. And you feel it when somebody is in pursuit of something bigger than just money.
And somehow, somewhere when you're in the pursuit of purpose, money shows up. I don't know why. Money tends to show.
You know what was something that I did? And it was funny because after I talked to Dr. Brooks about this, I realized it's something that the Tibetan monks and people like Buddhists do. I was dwelling on more mortality, my mortality. I know it sounds morbid, but I think it's actually a good practice and experiment for people to try.
Because when you think about life being, you know, it's finite, right? You are going to die someday. And when you are in that phase of, you know, the end of your life, What is it that's going to be important to you at that moment?
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Chapter 6: How do relationships contribute to overall happiness?
Is it going to be another 100,000 followers? Can't take those with you. Is it going to be another million dollars? Can't take that with you. Is it going to be another podcast? No. What is it going to be that's meaningful to you? And for me, it was the time I was with my family, the experiences that –
they're you can't put any value to them and and it's something that if you again if you it's called mortality dwelling but I mean if you think about it because for me I as a high achiever being being a parent I mean my productivity went down and I struggle with that for a while and and it wasn't until I really started thinking about what was most important to me and again I think
People can really tap into that by thinking about their death. And when you think about it, you'll find what's important to you. And it's not going to be the money. It's not going to be the fame. It's not going to be the followers. It's going to be. the memories and the experiences and those treasure moments with your people that you love, your family, your kids, your friends, your parents.
Those are the moments that are so precious. And, you know, that also brings me back to, like, a lot of people – Like they're searching for this higher power, right? Like there's like God or something spiritual, right? And for me, I was raised Catholic. So I had a baseline to go back to. And as I got older, I kind of drifted and became a little bit too analytical.
And it wasn't until I became a mother that I found God again.
Why?
Because the love I experienced... becoming a mother and the love I had for my son, not that I didn't love my husband as much, because I definitely love my husband too, but there's something about having a child that, this, your overwhelming sense of love.
And I, and I would go on these long runs and think about it and think about my, think about my mortality and never seeing my son again after I die. And I think it just can't be possible. You can't experience the bonding and the closeness and the love that you do as a parent. And then it just go away. And, and for me, I found God again.
And, and, you know, for other people, it might be something that's very traumatic. Sometimes there's, you get to your lowest point and that's how you basically can find God or whatever your spirituality is. But for me, it was becoming a mom and the love that I had for my son and thinking that it can't just be gone. Like it's too powerful. It's too powerful.
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Chapter 7: What practices can enhance a sense of purpose?
And I think part of that component is is finding your spirituality, whatever your religion is. Some people find that through meditation and eventually find God. But I think it's all part of happiness and people do sort of seek that out.
Did that also get you closer to mom and dad?
Everyone. It got me closer to everyone that I love. Everyone that I love. And it also helped me prioritize those relationships because it's so easy for people that are high achievers to get caught up in the, you know, productivity loop. I have to, I have to work. I have to do a podcast. I have to go give a presentation.
I have to do this work and get that satisfaction of like achieving and accomplishing those things. And there's a little bit of ego there and you have to separate that. And I realized that, no, I'm going to take time to do the family vacation. I'm going to take time to spend, you know, a few hours with friends that I care about.
I mean, you have to put in that work and that effort, but it's so rewarding. And this is the year, like as I was doing a podcast prep for Arthur, Dr. Arthur books, I know I've come to some of this realization on my own, but reading some of his books, like skimming some of his books and his material, everything was like, it was like this moment where it was like, this is so true.
And I really need to focus on it. You know, you need to make the effort to really be, happiness doesn't just come to you. I think a lot of people are sort of, it's like they have this misconception that happiness is something that you just experience. It just happens to you. No, it's just like a good diet. You have to like give yourself the right components. You have to work at it.
You know, it's work.
Have you read Outwitting the Devil?
No, I need your book list.
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Chapter 8: How can spirituality influence happiness and fulfillment?
I'm like, oh, my God, what a powerful book. How so many different institutions when we're kids use the concept of fear to scare the crap out of us. and were raised in such a confined, you know, no, I can't do, no, no, I can't. And then you finally realize, no, no, that's a business model. And you have to kind of let it go.
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