Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
This is a Global Player original podcast.
I feel terrible, but I couldn't think of anything worse than going to a pink gig.
I can't stop myself. If I see a new sauce, I'm getting it. That's where the Loch Ness Monster lives in Jon Hamm's pants.
Chapter 2: What unique nail choice does Amber defend this week?
Just because you hear something shady and shit about somebody doesn't mean that it's absolutely true. Leave fucking one-eyed Willie out of this.
oh jesus christ the excitement there's nothing wrong with my nails it's called fashion yeah i'm sure anna winter would really give them the thumbs up i won't be going camping are you okay no thank you very much i'm pregnant hello and welcome to vogue and amber the main Oh, sorry. That's okay.
I think you're actually turning into a mean girl.
You are. No, you're turning into a mean girl. You're the image of Gretchen Wiener. Amber, are you getting a discount, a discante on the nails? What the fuck is that color? Jesus. She's getting a discount. There's no. I like this color. She's. Why are we cycling through the primary colours, Amber? Why? What is wrong with you? Imo, how dare you?
Chapter 3: How did Vogue adjust to life after the holidays?
Show me your nails. Hold on, let me put my glasses on. Let me see. Exactly. Nothing, Imo. No effort, nothing. We'd rather nothing than have your scarred nails. Disgusting nails. This is called fashion. It is royal blue. Look it up. Unbelievable. I had to get the fucking yellow ones on before we recorded again. I had enough abuse. There's lots of people coming to my defense on that, by the way.
That is not true. No one came to your defense. Stop just making up stuff. Who? I want to see, as Alex Earl would say, or Alex Cooper, give me the receipts.
Chapter 4: What controversial dish does Amber create that divides opinions?
I don't believe you. Well, I'm back. Yep. Back here. It's back and she's still in holiday mode. Doesn't know what day of the week it is. Do you know what I will say to you guys? You're a pack of moaners. There's absolutely nothing wrong with the weather over here. It's warm. I was in a jumper today and I said, too hot actually. Bit too hot for the jumper. Bit too hot.
And it was beautiful outside. I have brought myself home. Eden Rock, you know where you go somewhere that there's a scent? Just doesn't feel the same back here. Doesn't feel the same. I've been spraying it all over the house and I'm like, doesn't smell. Cashel Palace. Cashel Palace. Oh, with their stuff that you're just going to let go off because you won't use it.
Amber got sent a gift from Cashel. You don't. She got sent a gift from Cashel Palace and we were trying to show off when Spenny's parents were over so we put the gift down in their room and they were staying. It was like a word to shampoo and conditioner and then she goes looking for it back. Fucking right I did.
That shit's expensive.
I haven't even used it yet. Straight back in with the L'Oreal.
Don't be slighting L'Oreal. They won't sponsor the part.
Take that back. There's nothing to slight about L'Oreal. Everyone uses L'Oreal shampoo. It's the go-to. Do you know what I do like the smell of? Pantene. Pantene Pro V. No, I used to love herbal essences. I remember all those sweet ones. What was that brand that had the really sweet ones? I don't remember. Oh, God.
We had to use special shampoo and conditioner, if that's what you can call it, in the jungle. Because it obviously goes down jungle drainage, which is basically just back into it. So it has to be like very organic and very nice.
And my God, was it shite.
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Chapter 5: What drama unfolds between Alex Cooper and Alex Earle?
I'm not going for his personality. I think I would rather. The ugly person, saying that about his bird. She has an ugly, what is it? An ugly bird personality. Sorry. Shut the F up. I would rather look like your man from the Goonies and have a good personality than look like David Haye with his personality. Leave fucking one-eyed Willie out of this. Ah, come on. He's fictional now. He's fictional.
I don't know where to go from that now. I was just trying to... I was trying to have Gemma's back because I think she's having a real hard time. I like her friendship with your man.
He seems like a really, really nice bloke. Are you watching the whole thing from start to finish? Tiki-taki.
TikTok, yeah.
Well, Gemma Collins, at least she's staying in this time because it's not easy. Last time she left after like a day, no? Ah, she's really having a hard time. It's, it's, it's hard. No one, I was like, someone was like, you should speak to somebody who went in. I was like, no, I'll be grand. She did Bear Grylls. But I fucking, Jesus Christ, that was harder than Bear Grylls.
I've never been so hungry. In Bear Grylls, at least we got sneaky Gatorades and I took up smoking because I was so hungry.
Yeah.
No, you took a smokey in the jungle. I took it up everywhere. Anywhere there's a chance of hunger, I'll smoke. Like Leah sent me this thing. Oh, I can't wait for us to go camping. I said, no, no, I won't be going camping. Are you okay? No, thank you very much. Not for me. I would go to Bear Island to have this. We went, I think it's called Wilder. Oh yeah.
And they had like, they had a woman that comes over to cook. It was the nicest food. It was stunning. The island has like one shop and one pub and it was just, it's amazing.
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Chapter 6: How does Justin Bieber's Coachella performance compare to others?
And then by the time she finally softens and lets you have a crisp, they went off three months. No, that's not true because Vogue has my brother's kids. My brother's kids are over. And then I see the little fellow going around and he's going around with a fucking share pack of Doritos, like hot Doritos. I was like, they're my dipping chips. Why does he have a full bag?
I was like, who gave you them? I said I could have them. I was like, oh, take them back.
Quickly wrap them up, put the clip on the back of the cupboard. That's enough for you. How much have you eaten?
My mom was like, cause I was telling my mom about the cupboard. She's like, oh, you're very like me, Ambie. I was like, mom, you had stuff from like the 1990s in that fridge. Yeah, mom is like disgusting. And they keep, they're trying to entice me to basically clean out their basement in Ireland because they're like, I think the Christmas decorations are still in there.
And then they know that I'm not able to control it. And they're like, whoever cleans it out can have the Christmas decorations. And I remember the decorations because I always admired them as a child. And now that they're on possible offer, I'm like, well, I clean out an entire basement just for a decoration.
It's not that bad down there. It's not that bad. I called her last night and she goes, oh,
And Bianca, I'm going to have to call you back. We're watching Emily in Paris. Neil's watching that? I said, mom, this, mom, this is bad. When she, when she fucked off to Rome, I couldn't deal with her. I thought, no, go back to Paris or something. But like, even like the fella that she fancied.
I thought you were talking about mom. I was like, what?
No, when Emily fucked off to Rome, I just thought, God almighty, this is bad. And then your man who she used to fancy in Paris, like, oh God, imagine having to go out with a man like that. No, thanks. I'm happy to say I have not watched it. I'm watching Friends and Neighbours with Jon Hamm, who I love, and it's very good. Have you ever seen him going around in trousers? Yes.
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Chapter 7: What are the implications of a missed lottery win?
And it's just like, I didn't think I could find you more attractive than any wanders around. Do your ears hang low? Some people do say that he's a bit of an a-hole, but I don't know. Allegedly, as Imo likes to say. Everyone has their a-hole days. Should I look at you half the time in this pod? A-hole. Imo, too much. I have a bit of news. I'm pregnant.
I am at a point where I can no longer hide it. It was like hell on earth trying to do it to like be in some bars because some bars have these like these ninja paparazzi. Now, in fairness, I saw him in a bush one day. I did spot him and I wasn't sure. But then like when you're on the beach, like trying to suck in at the
stage I'm at is just impossible you just but I wanted to keep it I wanted to keep it for as long as I could but to be honest with you I had my own reasons for wanting to keep it a secret to keep it a secret because I was nervous about what was going to happen and everything like that and like I even didn't want to announce it I'm announcing it tonight we're recording this on a Thursday
Because I wanted to go see my doctor first because I was like, I just need to make sure everything's okay again before I do. But like the amount of people that I know, it's like, it's a really exciting thing. But like the amount of people that have been asking me about it, like that I don't know. And I'm like...
Yeah, someone put it on that post about your wart, asking when she's going to announce the pregnancy.
I know, I just think it's just, it's like, you shouldn't do that to people because like, although you might like, like, would you do that to your friend if they hadn't told you? Like you kind of, I always feel like it's really important to just, some people will say it when they're ready to say it and need to say it.
And there's obviously reasons behind people not wanting to say it as I had my own reasons. And I felt like, I just felt like a lot of pressure when I was away because like, obviously you could, my boobs are like, Amber's boobs now, they're massive. Everyone's like, oh, she's had a boob job. Oh, it's a bikini. I'd be hiding the bras. But now it's very exciting news. The fourth and final.
That's, that is it. I don't, I don't even believe in you when you say it's the final. Amber, I'm not being that person. No, I've hit four. No one wants to invite you anywhere anymore. Perfect. And once you get to five, people are like, she's not well. Fucking Brady Bunch. She's not well. And also, she might not have been pregnant.
She could have just maybe just become a bit too fond of the sauces I have in the fridge. They went straight to the boob.
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Chapter 8: What exciting news does Vogue share about her personal life?
Oh, well, you know, there's like six Daves in my office. Well, I wasn't planning on naming the child Dave. I'm just making an observation.
Jesus, it was a valid observation in relation to the conversation.
I was thinking of doing something like bringing back the old school names, like Gary and Ian. Like, they're gone. Neil. I couldn't. And I couldn't. I couldn't be so nice to name it after. What about Kevin Kitty? Kevin Kitty. And we have Kevin Kitty coming up the rear end of the... We get too much mileage out of that man. No, I couldn't call it Sandra or Neil. I just couldn't. Or Dave or Jane.
Sandy would be cute.
Sandy. So the next question. What's the worst fuck up you've had whilst cooking?
Wow. The plastaca. Where do we start? I made spaghetti moussaka, which he wanted. I wouldn't touch off because it's got aubergines in it. But it was his favorite meal ever. And I was like, you know what, I'm going to... And I went and bought myself a blender and everything like that to blend up the onions and make it all delicious. Anyway, took fucking ages. Ages.
I never again, and I haven't done it since... And so anyway, we're eating and I was like, this is a bit weird. So I hadn't taken the plastic out of the new blender and I had blended up the onions with the plastic and all of it went into the Plastaca. And yeah, it was all ruined. And I thought that is...
that was like when our nanny used to cook for us and she was way too old to be cooking for us and she put the gravy in this like she put the gravy in this in this plastic jug and obviously when you're having a roast you love gravy and I poured it all over and I was like it was all melted plastic I was like and we had to eat it obviously dad sat beside me he fucking didn't even didn't even blink blink you know
And I was literally like, oh, I'm going to die here on the microplastics. I mean, that's what you get for being a fucking glutton. Oh, I like the one that you get to spend a day with your younger self. What age would you pick? I would pick 18 when I was an absolute mad joke and I just would go out partying and have a great old time with all my pals.
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