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Chapter 1: What happens at Emira's cowboy birthday party?
Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!
Crap!
Hello and welcome to Watch Where Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker. Joining me today, it's Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Well, hello. How are you? I'm doing just fab because we're here to talk about the season premiere. of Next Gen New York City, season two, episode one, Serving Country.
Before we get into that, join us on Patreon, patreon.com slash watch more crap and bonus episodes. We did a Real Housewives of Orange County trailer trash this week. free newsletter to all, to everyone, ad-free listening, video, all the good stuff. So join us there. And today, I mean, the kids are back. The kids are back.
And technically we were back because there was a Blink and You Miss It cameo by the two of us at the very end of the episode, which is hilarious. But next-gen New York City season premiere.
What did you think, Ronnie?
fun i was worried about the uh second season you know because it was a pretty good first season i thought wow can they keep it going pretty good yeah you know really good really good i felt like it felt more like uh like a show show in a certain way i felt like the season premiere last year the first like few episodes felt kind of like a sizzle reel a bit like there were cast members but there was sort of disjointed like um you know some people felt like they didn't even they were even part of the show until later on and the
in the run. It felt like we're just sort of cobbling together stuff. And there was like a big reliance on the parents, but this time around, it's like, okay, all the kids are here. They all have issues with each other, but all the issues are sort of like really petty and dumb. And like, we're sort of like out of the gates, uh, in a great place. So feeling really bullish.
Also got to give a shout out to the post-production team because, uh, This show has so much post-production going on, so much editing, so many little effects and throwbacks and visuals. They really went over time on Next Gen New York City. It's dizzying how quickly the show is zipping around all these different places and cutting back and forth. That seems like a real undertaking on Bravo.
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Chapter 2: How do the kids react to the season premiere of Next Gen NYC?
Makes me wonder where the F the Next Gen NYC cameras are. Where are they? Nancy Grace is like, I am on the case and I will figure out who is the head of this crypto kid.
better keep your eyes peeled yeah so uh we actually sent her on um amira and she's like amira i'm sorry amira and um she's like getting ready to get into her look she's like oh my god like the most important part is the highlighter xoxo
amira and so uh producers are like are you a gossip girl fan and she's like yeah i love gossip girl that's where like it came from by the way because her name is xoxo amira and um like they've definitely they're definitely like making her the narrator of the season last season was like we put they put brooks in the center in like the pilot seat but now it's amira
And kind of Ariana last year, like, I'm just a girl moving to New York. Yeah. This is crazy. People cross the street here without looking both ways. Amira basically does an entire episode of putting on makeup. I've never seen more glam. And I watch Housewives. Every time it's Amira, it's like getting on a different outfit and different makeup done by a glam team. It's so hard.
truly influencer it's difficult so uh now we see what everyone's doing ariana has one of those like meta is it the meta quest whatever the thing the virtual reality thing on and she's like how do i turn it on how do i turn on wait like is there an on bottom what do i do what do i do what do i do i just want to see her like crash into a wall and then georgia is walking and she's also on the phone and she's like um i mean the tariffs are not great like ow wait fuck my shoes coming out from the middle of the street thanks a lot tariffs
That cracked me up, Georgia.
Yeah, obviously tariffs not great. Ow, ow, ow, ow. Okay.
I want to know the greater context of that conversation. Oh my God, you have politics. Am I right?
So Amira's like, this group, if you can't believe it, it's gotten even more chaotic. Charlie had quite the interesting summer. Most people spent it in the Hamptons and Charlie almost spent it behind bars. Brooks is still Brooks. He randomly started baking sourdough bread.
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Chapter 3: What are the major conflicts among the cast members?
I had to film the whole process. They even wrapped my laundry basket. So you're making TikTok videos. She's like, yeah, guys today. Oh God, I got to start over. Hold on today. Oh, start over. Start over guys today. I'm going to move my pajama box.
Being an influencer, it's not your average nine to five, no matter like how my day is going, no matter how many laundry baskets they wrap up, no matter how if I feel like shit, I still have to do something because that's my way of income. So everyone who here wants to see a laundry basket with plastic around it, you're about to be shocked.
So she's like, yeah, you know, posting about the breakup. People are like, are they, you know, they're speculating about it. And so we made a decision to post on our story. I mean, I'm an influencer. So we had to make an influencer announcement. And we see a joint statement. Hudson and I have decided to go our separate ways.
These things are never easy, but we both know what's best for us right now and blah, blah, blah. So then we see a flood of the Bravo bloggers like, oh my God, Ariana made that joint statement. Ariana made a joint statement? She has broken up with Hudson. Can you believe that?
Because I'm famous.
Ariana, one of the most famous people in the world, has broken up with the fried chicken person. I want to know who was the content creator who said, my shitty day just got 10 times worse. And please tell me you were speaking tongue in cheek and they took you out of context because I can't imagine the person out there that's like, guys, I need to take a sick day.
I just found out that Ariana and Hudson broke up. I can't do this anymore. I can't. I can't.
I think this was the one that looked like an older guy, like an older straight guy, like with a beard. And he's like, my day just got 10 times worse. It's like, wow, this show has a big audience.
People really care. They're invested. He's like, I'm wrapping up my laundry basket in solidarity. Yeah. So Ariana is like, she's taking a magic eight ball to get some guidance, whatever. Be dazzled.
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Chapter 4: How does the breakup between Ariana and Hudson unfold?
And she says, it's the best. And you guys are seeing me again. And I'm in a really, really good place, which is awesome. And I grew up a lot from this. And now I'm ready to get back to my dream of starting a brutalist bowling alley called Club Club.
Yeah, it was like so hard to get better, but I put in the effort and I did. And then I got out and I heard a horrible, horrible word. Tear off.
Don't, don't, don't. By the way, this is like the first time that like a super serious issue has just been like, just slotted into a welcome back montage. Like normally this is the sort of thing that's like many scenes and very serious scenes on, on Bravo. And she's like, yeah. So I realized I had disordered eating. And so I went, I did inpatient and I'm back and I'm great.
Like on to the next thing, Ariana got a dog or something like that. It was just like, I was like, whoa, that was like a big deal.
You know? Now, the next headline is Damon Dash files for bankruptcy claiming $25 million in debt. And Ava's like, honestly, I think it's hilarious seeing what people post about me and my family. I mean, I think it's funny, but some of the things are so wrong. I mean, I'm not going to comment on it, but then other things are so right. I'm like, how the fuck did they know that? We see headline.
Up and Adam. Oh, no, we see Up and Adam, actually. And he's like, uh, today's one of the days I'm wearing sunglasses. And, like, Ava Dash got evicted. And, like, she was living in Tribeca for $9.95 million dollars a trillion quarter.
And then someone got evicted.
she's like just to be clear i was not evicted i gotta notice but i mean who hasn't am i right ava also has like a little bit of a new personality like because last season she was kind of like hi i'm ava dash but this season she's like hi i'm ava dash she's got like a little bit more pep in her step you know so she's like really trying to be like like i'm on camera yeah she's like okay i'm ava and they're like light a fire under that ass hi i'm ava it's like perfect places
So we see her out to eat with Georgia, and Georgia's like, wait, literally? I wanted, like, a seltzer all morning. Thank you so much for ordering this. And she goes, that's just regular water. She's like... She goes, um...
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Chapter 5: What are the rumors surrounding Charlie's past?
I was like, yes, Sue.
I do love the random bits of emphasis they've taught her. It's like, you never know what's going to happen.
Yeah.
Or just like the personality. Like my favorite still is when she says, okay.
Okay.
You're like, okay. That's it. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
Okay. That's how you want to do it.
I want one where it's like, okay. She also, sometimes she asks like a rhetorical, every now and then there's like a question that she'll ask and she does it in a tone that's kind of like sixth grade school play. She's like, I'm not quite sure about that. Maybe is that something you would like to look into? Why are you talking like that, Sue?
Because she thinks you're an idiot. That's her, you're an idiot voice. I'm not sure. Yeah. So now the conversation moves to Charlie and the crypto torture house, which he was involved in. He was living there two months in case people don't know what that was.
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Chapter 6: How does Amira's character evolve this season?
Well, I mean, he could be a grifter because he's like one of those crypto guys. But he could be a grifter, but he had a pretty big, nice office. in manhattan so true yeah well he's getting money from someplace so i don't know and of course this kid sees that and it's like i will take it i will be there so you can invest in my next crypto coin
And then Georgia, meanwhile, is like, by the way, I don't know if they're doing bowling or not, those guys, but it's insane that they're even hanging out. And by the way, speaking of insane, did you see Ariana and Hudson's coordinated breakup stories? And Ava's like, I know, are you like Kate Middleton? Like, who cares? Yeah, no. Kate Middleton, burn.
So Brooks is still making his bread. I don't know if it's the same bread or if it's a new bread, if it's a different day and a different loaf, like who knows? But he's like, I was really surprised to see that they like issued public statements. And Chloe's like, yeah, I was surprised too. Like it's no one's business, but opening the door to it answered. I mean, it opens people the questions like,
What do you call it if you fart under a blanket but then don't let me out? A Dutch oven. Told you. Told you.
Chloe, do you think like we should stop making this bread and wait for like mom and dad and aunt what's-her-face to come over so we can all put our hand on it before it goes in the oven? Yeah, I think that's like the right plan. But is it the oven or the Dutch oven? Whoa, that just like blew my mind.
So then we go back to Ava in Georgia, and Ava's like, yeah, the joint collab breakup announcement? I've never seen that before.
Like, I'm like, this is how you know that they're really young, because... I feel like the joint collab breakup thing is a thing that people do. Like Gwyneth Paltrow famously did it with What's His Face from Coldplay, right? Like the consciously uncoupling. I guess it's just like only old people do it and like the young people just don't. So she's like, whoa.
Was it because of how they did it? Like you'll be a collaborator on this post. It was like sponsored. Sponsored by like Four Loko. Yeah, but the main plot is, like, are they faking it for the show? Yes, of course they are. They're going to get back together. They're doing it for the show. No daughter of Zolciak is going to leave a billionaire. There's no way.
There's no way that Kim Zolciak would not be there barring the door, like you said earlier.
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Chapter 7: What is the significance of the group dynamics at the party?
So then we go back to Chloe and Chloe's like, there are going to be people that don't think it's real. And I think you should tell her that there are people that are going to think that and that she should be prepared for that. Are we talking about Dutch ovens still?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So then back to Ava and Georgia. Georgia's like, there's no way. It's not real. It's like PR. PR for the show. I don't care. I'm not going to say otherwise, okay? Until I get some bubbly water in here, I'm going to stick with my story. And Ava's like, I agree. And so Georgia's like, do you think that they used ChatGPT to help write the post?
Yeah.
I'm like, yes, obviously.
So now we go out waiting for a cab with Ariana and she's like, we're looking for a Toyota Highlander. Oh my God, I'm like Carrie Bradshaw right now.
And Ariana's like, since I was 14, I saw this boy who I loved and I wanted to help. And he always called me when he was down bad, the way billionaire children are. And he knew I was going to be there because I care about this person so deeply. And I love free chicken. And they deserve somebody to be there and to hold their hand.
And then as time went on, I kind of realized nobody was holding mine. What I thought was holding onto my hand was just an old drumstick becoming soggier and soggier.
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Chapter 8: How does the episode conclude with unresolved tensions?
And that's the thing. Like I would, I would like to clear the air. And then I also like, let's get to the bottom of these tariffs. Am I right? And it was like, yeah, I like to know where I'm at with people. Cause like we're New Yorkers. Like we want to like fucking know.
So Amira's saying we started to fall off with good drama. Ariana and Hudson broken up. Ava and Gia beefing. Me and George haven't cleared the air. And then Charlie, he's on his own little island. And then we go to Charlie, who is cool as ever, you guys. He's like, yeah, I'm Charlie. He's wearing sunglasses outside and it's dark. And he goes, yeah, yeah, sunglasses, yeah, yeah.
It's basically nighttime for me. It's basically nighttime for me because it's like dark outside. And they point to the sky like, it is actually dark.
It's amazing how that works. And then there are all these headlines. They keep showing the same shot of this video footage of Charlie at that torture house. And it's like, this is about Charlie. Allegedly, he was in the same town home where the crypto kidnapping took place. And he was in the house, the crypto bro, crypto, crypto, crypto.
And he's like, okay, I'm aware that TikTok is saying some shit about me, but I don't have it, so it doesn't affect me all that directly. Yeah, I don't do TikTok, okay? I'm a little bit more progressive.
so i really only see the positive things about myself i'm like so you're not releasing much are you and he goes the negatives they don't really like they don't know my narcissism like i'm blind to it like it's like hieroglyphics you know it's like then like compliments i'm like good with like the noise i'll be like fine i'm like you're making no sense reading through that paragraph i was like what is he saying here
He's like, my narcissism filters out the bad stuff. It's like, bad stuff looks like hieroglyphics. I only see compliments, so yeah. So then Charlie calls Hudson, and he's like, Colin, just check in. I saw that Instagram story yesterday about you guys breaking up or some shit. I'm glad it was on Instagram so I know, because I do not have TikTok.
Yeah. Hudson's like, yeah, I think it's been coming for a while. It's like, yeah, crazy news. You know, it's like, yeah, I know. It's like the streets are rippling in response to it, except maybe on TikTok, but I wouldn't know because I don't have it. It's like, yeah, it's the whole entire nation's talking about a breakup. It's crazy, man.
National attention giveth and national attention taketh away, am I right? Celebrity Bible, we're famous now. It's like the law of speakers. The producer's like, whoa, you guys are friends now? That's weird. And he's like, couldn't disagree more. I mean, I think we're like the most likely duo. I mean, you know, I got to take Hudson under my wings. He's a sweet, borderline too nice billionaire.
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