Chapter 1: What identity crisis does Killian experience on TV?
This show is part of the Headstuff Podcast Network.
Have you gone to the gym this morning, boys? Yes. Yes. Did you? I went last night.
Oh, last night?
Oh, yeah. Wow.
Last night, I went. You went to? To the gym. To the gym? Yeah. Cillian, you were a bit young. You don't know that, like, The Strokes was enough. That album was... was enough for like, that could fuel your whole identity, your every night out, your getting ready, your afters. You just had to put on that album and that was enough. Your clothes, your hair.
Oh God, remember I used to be able to do things with my hair. That's all you could do. All you did. I'll tell you, if there's any young men listening, do stuff with your hair. I have such deep regrets. You know Mike Rice had the bleach hair? I'm like, hot. I'm like, do it. Do stuff with your hair. Shave it off. Don't do crap stuff, but do stuff with it.
Shane is like Tom Hanks at the end of Saving Private Ryan. Earn this. Do it with your hair. He's like a wispy Tom Hanks.
I'm just thinking about it a lot lately. I understand that joke, Tony. Live the life that I wish I could have lived. Yeah, yeah.
It's the fabulous Tony Cantwell. I'm talking about Shane Daniel Burner.
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Chapter 2: What funny incident happened during the sauna visit?
It was better being in front of your eye.
Yeah.
So that you could push it away from being in front of your eye.
See, it's funny. With the strokes, because I remember interviewing you.
I think you were having a stroke just there. Did you think that, Cillian Sunderman?
What's the first sign? Funny thing about stroke is... I actually don't remember what's the things, the letters. He doesn't remember. The first sign is ask them if they know.
Face, arms, speech, time to call an ambulance.
Because I remember having you on my podcast and I interviewed you and I asked, and one of the questions that I was going to ask all my guests was, what kind of subculture did you belong to? And you were kind of like the first one to make me realize. And then I asked everyone else, I had Ali Fox, she's like, nothing, you know, like that was not a thing for everyone.
But how big you are into the strokes, I'm surprised you didn't make that.
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Chapter 3: What neighborly conflict is discussed in the episode?
And you shifted, Terry. I shifted with somebody that night, but we didn't get married.
Oh. What?
Didn't have two kids? You didn't follow through? We don't have kids. I don't know. I still know him because in gay land, you can do that and you're still friends. Oh.
When you say gay land, I just pictured. Yeah, it sounds like a magical place. You know, candy canes. No, it's really sick. It stinks. It stinks of poppers.
The whole place stinks of poppers. We kissed, but I'm not even mad at you anymore.
Yeah, we just can't be friends. Very gay.
You can be friends. On Dildo Mountain. On Dildo Mountain. I don't need... Cillian, I have a question for you. Question? Does the name Kevin mean anything to you this week? Why? Yes, it does. Because... So there am I sitting waiting for you guys to arrive to the Pod Crail studio. And I see a clip of Fanula J talking about that I'm a celebrity thing. And I was like, what is that?
What happened with that big fight and I'm a celebrity? And then I saw beside her on the couch was Cillian. I was like, oh, how fun. Yeah. So I was watching the clip intently, hoping for Vanilla J's analysis as a pop culture journal.
You shouldn't be bringing this up.
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Chapter 4: How did the Lidl heist unfold?
Did you hear that?
Did you hear that?
What do you think, Kevin?
What do you think, Kevin? And I mean, my heart does go out to him because that's the kind of thing that can just happen. I know. And he has someone in his ear and he has an iPad in his hand and he has an autocue and he has real life people that sometimes an accident happens. Can I say the energy of those two was amazing. They were really, really good.
But then they were interviewing me about my TV show, Show Kids. And they said, how was Showtime? I was like, you just called me Kevin, and now I'm on Showtime?
Fast. Did you say this?
Fast. No, no, I didn't. Because, I mean, it's a high-pressure situation, and I don't want to come off like an asshole. But then I kissed Brian Dowling. Oh, lovely. Because I was talking about my, I think, I Can Speak Your Language sketches, and they were like, and you kiss people in it. And I was like, yeah, I just kiss people in it, and blah, blah, blah. And then Brian was like, let's just kiss.
And then I was like, oh, yeah, okay. And then I went up and kissed, and... It was very obvious that he was going for the cheek, but I hadn't. I was like, oh, I traditionally do this on the lips. Yeah, yeah.
And you got to flog those tickets.
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Chapter 5: What unexpected event occurred during the TV show?
You never have a story where you're like, yeah, it was fine. I was a bit tired. Maybe I will when it happens. Maybe I will when it happens.
Sending off zingers. Sending off zingers. It's like someone who's never succeeded.
You understood storytelling. This is the point of the story where the person thinks things are going great and then... Oh, okay. So things are going great. I'm like, pang, pang, pang. Smash that, smash that. Were you sending off zingers? Sending off zingers. You see the sort of gun hand, finger thing?
I see what you're doing, yeah. For the audio listeners.
It's going great. And then they said, they started talking about the Michael Jackson movie. And I was like, oh, God. Hope they don't throw it to me on this one. And then they're like talking about it. They're blah, blah, blah, blah. And then they're like, and Kevin, do you think you'll go see the Michael Jackson movie? And I was just like, no. And they're like, really?
And I was like, yeah, I mean, and I made the mistake of being like honest on live TV. Yeah, I mean, to be honest, I don't think anyone should go see that film.
Yeah.
Okay, yeah, cool, okay.
Nice.
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Chapter 6: What are the challenges of confronting difficult people?
Black Panther. Kevin. Wakanda forever. Black camper. We woke up. We've had some notes on the van. You woke up. It's a posh street we live on. Wealthy people. They've got their big, huge, fuck-off Jeeps that they seem to think are tiny, even though we've measured them with a measuring tape, and they're about a couple of inches shorter than our van.
We get notes on our van saying it's too big, it's blah, blah, blah. But then they've stopped and everything's fine. And, you know, we've started to feel like maybe we're part of the community. That's so weird. Your van is too big. Fuck off. Yeah, too big, apparently.
If I saw someone measuring my car, I'd probably call Special Branch.
Well, I'm just measuring the pavement next to the car. I'm not measuring the car. Ah, very clever. So it's illegally. Anyway, we woke up, went for a morning walk, because that's what all the podcasts and social media things are telling me I'm supposed to do, get sunlight on my face. Talk to your dad. Talk to my dad. You know, I was just like walking around.
Someone on the television had called me Kevin the night before, so I was kind of having a tough thing. Still reeling from that. And I go to my van, and this note is on it. Please take this junk to Hammond Lane scrap. Oh my God. Written on a diary, page a day diary here. Yeah. The 16th of... No. It's the 29th of... I don't know.
Look, I can't... Over 60. That's an old person who wrote that. That's an old person. The name of the skip is over 60.
Handwriting.
That's someone who doesn't use Google Maps.
That's a man because he knows where the scrap is. And men know where scrap is. It's a man over 60.
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Chapter 7: How do the hosts reflect on their experiences with humor?
I was going to photocopy the note and put it in the windscreen of every single car on the road.
Very good.
I was like, this is what I'm going to do. I would love that. Everyone was like, no, you're going to escalate. This is what the person wants. They want some sort of reaction. Tell you what I would do. I would get a megaphone and on Saturday morning, and most people are going to be home, I would do, whichever coward wants to write notes, come out and talk to me right now.
I would do that right now because it's also an old guy. You've got to be able to take him. And I would do it. I would go, whose note is this? Or I would knock on every door and go, hi, did you leave this note in my car? I would do every, I would really not be able to stand this. No, yeah, well, you see, the thing is they want an escalation. That's what everyone has told us. Can I go around?
I'll fucking give it to you. Then I was going to knock on the door. It was Monday morning. I was going to knock on every single door.
with Anna and Anna was like I was like I was angry and then I told Anna and I was like I suddenly became the calmer downer I was like but she was like we need to do something about this and we were fuming ruin our day it's very mean like it's really mean it's a horrible thing to do take this piece of junk it's your own home though camper van you live there this is your own home so you'll have a van if you want to have a van
No, do you know what? It's the same thing as when the light goes green and I have it immediately taken off and someone beeps. You just hit the slow down button because I'm going to be the slowest person pulling out from the screen because of that beep. You have just now, this is a double down camper van. He still has your phone, Cullen. Tony still has your phone. No, I'm curious.
Double down, don't move it. No, look, this is from a diary, okay? So this is from a 2015 day planner.
I know, that's the kind of people they hold onto.
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Chapter 8: What insights do the hosts share about community interactions?
We're pretty sure which house it is. So I kind of make sure I park it outside of that house. That's punishment. Every single day. And it ruined our day. And I remember saying to Anna, I was like... And, you know, that note has ruined our day. But take comfort in the fact that we ruin their lives every day. Yeah, that's very true.
That's very good. That's very good. So that's what we do.
But my next thing was I wanted to spray paint on their house. I hate poor people because we have like a white transit van. Like it's like a classic kind of working class looking van.
That's what the problem is.
That's what the problem is. Like, that's what they don't want on the street. They don't like that. Even though their house is like full of work that people have done. Like, they don't like the idea of that being visible or something like that. And so they're like, get this piece of junk. Even though it's a good working van.
It's nice.
But yeah, so that kind of ruined our day. And we're trying to, I don't know, I was thinking maybe I could get the A story to kind of think of ways that I can respond to this. I mean, this slight against not just me. Shane and Tony and our entire community also it's a class war it's a class war as well yeah it's a class war on a global scale that's from Michael Jackson's Black and White
No, I was trying to bring it away from that.
He was on to Epstein. What do you think, Kevin? Do you know what you do? Let's ask Kevin.
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