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Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Tom's Mom Joins OnlyFans | Your Mom's House Ep. 794

22 Jan 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What surprising new chapter is Charo starting?

25.329 - 44.586 Ad Sponsor

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46.687 - 50.569 Unknown Speaker

Okay, let's go. Sounds like we're ready.

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50.589 - 57.732 Christina Pazsitzky

What's normal?

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57.832 - 62.174 Unknown Speaker

We're normal. We're more normal than most people in the world.

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Chapter 2: How did Charo become the star of the vacation?

62.194 - 63.935 Christina Pazsitzky

Honestly. You put the headphones on. Yeah.

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71.701 - 72.482 Unknown Speaker

I think it should be better.

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72.562 - 75.364 Tom Segura

Churro, do you want to button your sweater so that your tetas don't?

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77.225 - 78.446 Christina Pazsitzky

That's a good part of me.

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78.506 - 85.832 Tom Segura

I think you should button it. Oh, shit. What do you want me to button? Button your sweater. Button it.

86.453 - 87.914 Christina Pazsitzky

Oh, I thought I was showing something.

88.174 - 89.815 Unknown Speaker

No, she thinks it looks better buttoned.

89.855 - 92.417 Tom Segura

I'm telling you, as somebody who, you know, you just want it.

92.798 - 93.198 Unknown Speaker

Yeah.

Chapter 3: What are the reactions to Charo's OnlyFans idea?

94.499 - 100.944 Tom Segura

If you want the show to have class and good scenes. No, we don't. What do you think of my drawing of Tom?

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102.938 - 103.498 Christina Pazsitzky

I can see it.

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103.518 - 103.978 Unknown Speaker

I love it.

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104.258 - 108.919 Christina Pazsitzky

I love it. And this one? You did that? She did that. Get out.

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109.459 - 110.58 Unknown Speaker

Do you think that looks like me, though?

111.62 - 111.78 Christina Pazsitzky

No.

112.36 - 112.66 Unknown Speaker

Okay.

112.8 - 121.562 Christina Pazsitzky

But it's a good story. Thank you. I'm working. It's so weird.

121.882 - 122.102 Unknown Speaker

No.

Chapter 4: What hilarious TikToks did they react to?

149.927 - 152.67

Welcome! Hey, hey, hey, hey!

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154.902 - 158.624 Unknown Speaker

You're Austin's newest celebrity resident. How does it feel to be here?

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159.004 - 172.629 Christina Pazsitzky

Oh, my God. Where do I start? The fact that just being here close to you guys and be able to see each other every weekend, it's just glorious. I don't know.

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172.829 - 175.65 Tom Segura

I don't know. What's wrong with you?

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176.41 - 178.331 Christina Pazsitzky

Are you okay?

178.591 - 183.573 Tom Segura

I think that headphones on your cheek and not on your ear. Can you push it back to your ear?

184.073 - 185.294 Christina Pazsitzky

Is that what you're laughing?

186.054 - 186.415 Tom Segura

No, no, no.

186.435 - 211.632 Christina Pazsitzky

Careful with the mug on the thing. Okay, okay, okay. So, um... Yeah, friendly.

Chapter 5: How did the LA wildfires impact the episode?

258.531 - 261.272 Unknown Speaker

Always?

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261.372 - 293.89 Christina Pazsitzky

Not him, the song. Ah, que demonita. Which one? Oh, he's here. No.

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295.712 - 295.872 Unknown Speaker

Yeah.

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296.032 - 320.64 Christina Pazsitzky

No, no, we're just, we're not supposed to talk during that whole time. But, okay, let's get into it. First of all, did you like that clip? No, you did not like it. I don't remember the clip.

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320.82 - 321.24 Unknown Speaker

The guy.

321.26 - 350.021 Christina Pazsitzky

What? No. You don't think he's cute? I think he's really cute. Yeah, he kind of looks like me. A little bit. Look to both of you. Christina. I think he's hot. Christina, you can have him. Okay, I don't know if Tommy is attracted to you because if you like that guy and you like Tommy, maybe with Tommy she sees similarities. I do, I do. I see similarities myself. Actually, you have the glasses.

350.341 - 354.164 Unknown Speaker

I have the glasses, I have the beard. I have the chest hair and the hair.

Chapter 6: What is the deal with Charo's coffee preferences?

354.224 - 360.709 Christina Pazsitzky

And the nose is spot on. Yes, and then you feel like you're so cool and you open the robe.

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360.769 - 362.891 Unknown Speaker

It's sort of like my brother's out there somewhere.

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363.391 - 363.732 Christina Pazsitzky

Yes.

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364.052 - 364.873 Unknown Speaker

Wait, is this my brother?

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364.913 - 365.573 Christina Pazsitzky

Or are you faking?

366.234 - 366.874 Unknown Speaker

Is this my brother?

367.194 - 374.057 Christina Pazsitzky

No. That's when I used to inflate you and put it back in there. I did it. I did it.

374.377 - 374.897 Unknown Speaker

What did you do?

375.578 - 376.038 Christina Pazsitzky

Change you.

Chapter 7: How did the conversation shift towards psychedelics?

432.916 - 444.46 Unknown Speaker

That was funny. I'm sitting here like this. She's sitting behind me, right? And she's holding on. And she'd go, slow down. I was like, we're good. And she'd go, you are good.

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444.6 - 450.583 Christina Pazsitzky

And then intentionally, Christina, no. Then he would go like, you know. But you were good. Yeah.

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450.643 - 452.764 Tom Segura

But you didn't like that he was going too fast.

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452.924 - 456.226 Christina Pazsitzky

No, he was going extreme. In fact, he kept accelerating the more scared I got.

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456.526 - 456.826 Tom Segura

Yeah.

457.307 - 460.669 Christina Pazsitzky

And then, I don't remember. And then what?

460.829 - 496.882 Unknown Speaker

She doesn't remember. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Can't lift the cup. How's the coffee?

497.952 - 499.874 Christina Pazsitzky

Delicioso. Un poquito frio, pero delicioso.

499.894 - 500.294 Unknown Speaker

You want more?

Chapter 8: What funny clips were shown during the episode?

502.036 - 503.617 Unknown Speaker

You want a hot one? We'll bring you a hot one.

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503.837 - 504.058 Christina Pazsitzky

Thank you.

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505.079 - 510.604 Unknown Speaker

Please. Okay, now back to the microphone. We were just talking about how great the vacation was.

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510.944 - 513.426 Tom Segura

And really it was because of your positive attitude.

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513.887 - 516.489 Unknown Speaker

And you also ate more shrooms than anybody. Remember?

516.509 - 539.143 Christina Pazsitzky

I want to talk about the real thing. It's a stupid story. No, I'm serious. Serious is what I'm going to say. Number one, you could not dream for any human being with billions and billions in total to have a better gift of this vacation with you guys. It was above and beyond any expectation in my short life.

539.683 - 561.617 Tom Segura

And also, might I say you've embraced, at your age, if you might, it's okay saying you're 80 years old, 80 years young. and that you've embraced, I would say, such a cool lifestyle, the lifestyle I want to have. You're into all kinds of things. May I say? Yeah. You're into edibles now?

561.877 - 562.698 Unknown Speaker

Yeah, psychedelics.

562.778 - 563.459 Tom Segura

Psychedelics?

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