The Moon And Sixpence 15.7

I have alwaysbeen a little disconcerted by the passion women have for behaving beautifullyat the death-bed of those they love. Sometimes it seems as if they grudge thelongevity which postpones their chance of an effective scene."But now-- now it's finished. I'm as indifferent to him as if he were a stranger. I shouldlike him to die miserable, poor, and starving, without a friend. I hope he'llrot with some loathsome disease. I have done with him. "I thought it aswell then to say what Strickland had suggested."If youwant to divorce him, he's quite willing to do whatever is necessary to make itpossible. ""Whyshould I give him his freedom?""I don'tthink he wants it. He merely thought it might be more convenient to you. "Mrs. Stricklandshrugged her shoulders impatiently. I think I was a little disappointed in her.I expected then people to be more of a piece than I do now, and I wasdistressed to find so much vindictiveness in so charming a creature. I did notrealise how motley are the qualities that go to make up a human being. Now I amwell aware that pettiness and grandeur, malice and charity, hatred and love,can find place side by side in the same human heart.I wondered ifthere was anything I could say that would ease the sense of bitter humiliationwhich at present tormented Mrs. Strickland. I thought I would try.女人们总是喜欢在她们所爱的人临终前表现得宽宏大量，她们的这种偏好叫我实在难以忍受。有时候我甚至觉得她们不愿意男人寿命太长，就是怕把演出这幕好戏的机会拖得太晚。“但是现在——现在什么都完了。我对他就象对一个路人似的什么感情也没有了。我真希望他死的时候贫困潦倒、饥寒交迫，一个亲人也不在身边。我真希望他染上恶疮，浑身腐烂。我同他的关系算完了。”我想我不妨趁这个时候把思特里克兰德的建议说出来。“如果你想同他离婚，他很愿意给你制造任何离婚所需要的口实。”“为什么我要给他自由呢？”“我认为他不需要这种自由。他不过想这样做可能对你更方便一些。”思特里克兰德太太不耐烦地耸了耸肩膀。我觉得我对她有些失望。当时我还同今天不一样，总认为人的性格是单纯统一的；当我发现这样一个温柔可爱的女性报复心居然这么重的时候，我感到很丧气。那时我还没认识到一个人的性格是极其复杂的。今天我已经认识到这一点了：卑鄙与伟大、恶毒与善良、仇恨与热爱是可以互不排斥地并存在同一颗心里的。我不知道我能否说几句什么，减轻一些当时正在折磨着思特里克兰德太太的屈辱。我想我还是该试一试。

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