Abbie Chatfield

It's a nightmare sleep.

It's a, oh, my God, I don't want to wake up sleep where you're like, oh –

peace at last.

And then you wake up and you go instant anxiety.

Like I'm at the stage where like, before I even open my eyes in the morning, when I have that first, like waking up thought, like, you know, like you're asleep and you're going, and maybe the first thought you have is like, I wonder what time it is or whatever, you know, before you even opened your eyes, you could keep sleeping in theory.

Every single morning it's at like four o'clock, four 30.

It's like,

It's like I wake up and the first thing is a rush of adrenaline and a rush of cortisol.

It feels like it.

And then I think, what the fuck is going to happen today?

What's going to happen today?

And my mind runs through every possibility of what could happen in that day that would go wrong, what media they could run, what stories they could concoct.

I run through what I've said on the podcast or guests we've had on.

And I think, well, how could they twist that?

Like, what are they going to do?

are they going to do a story about a video that I've done and twist it and change it?

Like, am I going to get another onslaught of abuse because some random right wing freak makes a video about me?

Like, as I do every day, by the way, I go, guys, I literally like, how is there this much content about me?

I'm like, you're fucking obsessed.

It's really strange.