Alex Cooper

Is there a moment as a kid that you like acutely remember being like, oh, something is off with her or was it just always a constant?

And what would you like?

Would you ask your father and he wouldn't share?

Well and I think something Cara that is so weird as adults that you have to we have to start to realize which I have a lot of conversations people about is like we love our parents and we also were like that was a weird fucked up thing that happened in my childhood and I think it's hard to grapple with like you can still say that

things did not feel right in your childhood and both things can kind of exist.

And I think it's an odd feeling because it seems like you've kind of made amends with your family and you guys are like on great terms.

But also a child's perception is everything.

It doesn't matter if you were seeing it slightly different than maybe your father was seeing it.

That was your reality.

And so the fact that you were saying, I literally thought my mom was dead.

I had no idea where she was.

That's like your...

you're in shock and you're going through grief and all of those things at a really young age and you're just alone.

And like, it seems like you didn't really have anyone to talk to.

I just didn't have the tools to talk.

Well, I think also because like you just said, like then you just kind of go on the run and you're like, I've got to figure myself out.

I've got to get through this.

And you don't, no one has time to fucking like think about their childhood until you finally can breathe a little bit and be like, what happened back then?

Yeah.

And it's also like to your father's credit.